Warning: NSFW content ahead.
Break was a surprisingly good teacher. Not only in terms of... skill... but he kept to his word and took things slowly so as to not overwhelm his student. Every time they met after that day, Break had made it a routine to kiss Gilbert at least once without fail.
Naturally such a brazen action was unadvisable, considering they mostly met in the workplace or in the park – people would eventually notice and wonder why Gilbert always returned red-faced after meeting with Break. But whether it was a greeting kiss, parting one, or even just one for the sake of teasing the younger man, Break made it a routine to never miss an opportunity – or make one if needed.
When Gilbert no longer looked as though he would faint from a single, somewhat innocent kiss, Break decided it was time to initiate the first proper lesson: how to kiss back. He insisted it was fairly simple, but not surprisingly, this was a great challenge for the younger male at first since embarrassment lead to clumsiness. There was a brief period during which Gilbert nearly gave up completely, insisting he had reached his limit. Yet in the end he persevered, spurred on by Break's relentless reminder of his missing Master and the threat of the Nightrays.
It was not long before Gilbert proved himself to be an astonishingly quick learner, and eventually he was able to move perfectly in sync with Break. The latter almost felt pleased if it weren't for the disturbing fact that Gilbert's swift improvement was triggered only after the long pep talk Break had given him to stop him from giving up.
So, that was the very basics down. They might've moved on if Break hadn't noticed how tense Gilbert always was during their lessons. It was a slight effort but the ruby-eyed man somehow coaxed Gilbert into relaxing more. Strangely, Gilbert was more likely to do so if Break acted like his usual, irritating self. Apparently, the raven-haired male was not used to a serious Break (which was just plain rude, even Break could be serious when he wanted to), thus became more self-conscious than usual.
Eventually Gilbert no longer tensed, which was a sign for Break to move onto the next step. Gilbert had received quite a shock when Break one day decided to introduce tongue into the mix. As soon as he felt Break's lips part and the man's tongue sliding across his lips, his body stiffened just like that day when it all began. That's when Break decided to pull back.
Break could clearly see that Gilbert was nervous, which was okay because admittedly, he felt a bit nervous himself. This kind of kissing usually escalated quickly and Break wasn't sure if either of them was ready for that. So, Break had instructed Gilbert to relax and simply let him lead for now – but if he could, try to do what felt natural.
The younger male gave a tentative nod, after which Break resumed from where he left off. This time when he licked the seam of Gilbert's lips, the latter slowly parted his lips by a fraction. It was just enough, and when Break slipped his tongue past it earned him muffled gasp of surprise from Gilbert. At first he did absolutely nothing apart from stare wide-eyed at Break, whose own eye was closed as he slowly, gently explored his partner's mouth…
"Just do whatever feels natural. Understand?"
...But after a while Gilbert allowed his eyelids to slip shut, and he reached up to clutch at the lapels of Break's coat. The feel of Break's tongue gliding over his own was almost frightening with the way it set his body alight with a foreign emotion. And his heart was pounding so loudly in his ears that he wouldn't be surprised if Break could hear it to. All the strength had deserted Gilbert's knees and if it weren't for Break's arm around his waist, he would have surely collapsed by now.
It wasn't long before instinct took over and slowly, tentatively, Gilbert began moving his own tongue against the foreign one in his mouth. Break's eye shot open in response; he hadn't expected Gilbert to react so soon at all. The man really was a quick learner... In fact, in a startling moment of realisation it dawned upon Break that once he taught him everything he knew, Gilbert would probably grow to be a professional in such things, just like – if not better – than that damn sewer-rat brother of his.
The kiss didn't last long at all since Gilbert ran out of breath quite fast. When they parted, Break openly smirked at that fact, ending their day's lesson with by saying, "We're going to have to work on your breathing, Raven. You barely lasted a minute!"
That only earned him a smack on the head by the impressively large pile of paperwork Gilbert had been sent to deliver from Reim before he stomped out of Break's office, red-faced. When he was gone, Break started laughing at his own silliness.
"A professional? Maybe. But he'll always be the same old useless Raven no matter what."
Their new lessons took longer for Gilbert to master than originally expected, but eventually it came to the point where Gilbert would no longer tense up or react exaggeratedly to Break's advances. Suddenly being pinned to a wall and having the breath kissed out of him while walking down empty corridors was starting to become the norm for the young adopted Nightray. He was even able to keep up with Break's pace at one point, and that's when Break knew it was finally time to kick things up a notch...
But he couldn't do it.
He didn't know why, but he simply couldn't. Perhaps it was because of the daunting fact that Gilbert had never, ever initiated any of their kisses. Not even once. It was always Break who made the first move, even when they would be completely alone together with no chances of anyone stumbling upon them. Gilbert knew that those were perfect conditions to 'practice', but he would never even suggest it. Instead he would wait. He would wait until the last minute, when either he or Break had to leave which was when the red-eyed man had to take matters into his own hands.
He would never ask Gilbert to correct such behaviour though.
Because to the adopted Nightray, that was the ultimate betrayal of his heart.
Although Gilbert seemed collected and determined on the outside, Break knew very well the pain he was concealing within his heart. The young man had never wanted any of this, so to take initiation on his own… he couldn't bring himself to betray his feelings for Oz like that. They both knew deep down that Gilbert couldn't keep up such an attitude forever. But for now at least, Break would respect this one wish.
That was why, for something like that... Break felt as though he needed some kind of permission. Or rather, an invitation from Gilbert that would allow him to take things further, even though Break was the one leading.
Then one day, it came.
It had been the last thing Break would have expected from Gilbert on a day like that one. The only indication he would have ever received was that Gilbert didn't seem like himself that time. Break pondered, after that day, what could possibly have led the young Nightray to become more emotional than usual. Eventually he could only assume that the man might've been plagued by dreams of his Young Master the night before. What kind of dreams? He couldn't be sure.
One evening, Gilbert visited the Rainsworth mansion in order to pass on some urgent Pandora-related documents to Break. But his short visit became prolonged when a heavy storm erupted during their tea time, preventing him from leaving until the skies cleared. It was well past midnight when they finally concluded that the storm wasn't going to subside any time soon. So before retiring to her room for the night, Sharon had instructed Break to show Gilbert to a guestroom before going to bed himself.
Gilbert simply nodded at Mistress and servant – all his words and actions that day had been quite minimal – before quietly following Break with an expression of badly concealed melancholy.
They walked down the long hallways in frosty silence, Break leading the way while the young Nightray lagged behind. There was something about the aura Gilbert gave off that discouraged Break from trying to cheer him up with his usual antics. Even Break had the sense to deem when tomfoolery was inappropriate. But it deeply bothered him that Gilbert didn't even try to hide his troubled state of mind, so Break pondered the entire way to the guestroom on how to take the other male's mind off his worries.
Eventually he could think of one thing only.
Break made sure to silently lock the door behind him after ushering Gilbert into the bedroom. The last thing he needed was for any of the night-duty servants to interrupt them now that they were finally alone.
Gilbert shed off his coat and cast away his cravat and hat, tossing them all on the dresser, oblivious to Break's lingering presence or the click of the door lock.
Then he turned around, and Break was on him.
The shock was evident in Gilbert's eyes, yet strangely Break found this to be a good sign. It was the first time Gilbert had shown any emotion other than misery today, so he was relieved to see that the younger man still retained his sense of self.
But then it was Break's turn to be surprised when Gilbert relaxed beneath Break's looming figure and snaked his arms around the elder's neck, closing his eyes while parting his lips readily. Break had been fully prepared to face Gilbert's wrath and be sent crashing into a wall for his behaviour. This kind of reaction could only mean that the young Nightray was either very used to Break's advances or he had been expecting it. Or perhaps even both.
It was almost always Gilbert who broke their kisses which served as a sign for both men to stop before things got any more heated, but on that particular night it went on for longer than usual. Break didn't notice however, soon becoming lost in the moment and unconsciously allowing his hands to roam. This had happened a few times before, but either he himself would notice and stop or Gilbert would pull away, uneasy.
But this time he was stopped by another reason entirely.
It was muffled, but unmistakable. Gilbert had moaned.
Break's eye shot wide open.
"Wait... Don't tell me...?"
It wasn't that unusual for Gilbert to make quiet sighs and whimpers when they kissed like this. In fact, sometimes Break would deliberately try and get the other man to release those sounds for his own personal satisfactions. But this time it was clearly different.
He instantly separated from Gilbert and stared at him, only to have his worst suspicions confirmed.
Gilbert sported a dark blush that went up to his ears and radiated an impressive amount of heat. His eyes were half lidded, but the lust they were glazed over with was unmistakable. He was panting slowly, clearly having a harder time than usual at catching his breath.
It was then when Break noticed how their bodies were pressed up against each other. At some point Break must've pinned Gilbert's wrists above his head with one hand without realising it, preventing Gilbert from pushing him away. One of his thighs had also wedged itself between Gilbert's legs, nudging apart. That inadvertently allowed Break to feel something else pressed up against him
"Oh my God... He's so..."
Break's usual confidence suddenly abandoned him.
"When? When did this happen? Why didn't I notice earlier? Why didn't he-"
He was yanked out of his thoughts with a gasp when he felt something rub against his growing erection. Gilbert had started to move his hips back and forth unconsciously in a desperate attempt for some friction, biting his lip hard to suppress any sounds.
"B-Break..." groaned Gilbert. Just the way he said Break's name alone made him feel an unnecessary amount of heat rush down south. "I... I need..." What did he need again? Gilbert suddenly couldn't recall. His mind felt hazy, clouding out all other thoughts except the intense desire for… something.
But Break knew. And he could hold back no longer.
It all happened in the blink of an eye. Break dived in and captured Gilbert's lips in an open-mouthed kiss. The latter's mind was far too clouded with need to think straight anymore, and he eagerly responded to Break's kiss with another moan. Break let go of Gilbert's wrists and allowed his hands to roam more freely now, and although Gilbert tensed a bit, he didn't resist nor push the hands away.
Something had to be done about Gilbert's shirt, thought Break as they parted for air, and so he made short work of the shirt's golden clasps. Rather than pulling it off completely, he simply slipped it off the man's shoulders and allowed his hands to memorize ever contour of Gilbert's well-toned body.
"The body that I helped shape..." though Break absentmindedly, being the one responsible for putting the Raven-wielder through many hellishly vigorous training sessions.
Gilbert was rolling his hips more openly and frequently now, letting out breathless gasps against Break's lips after particularly rough thrusts. Noticing this, Break decided to ease his suffering by speeding things up. It was a shame though, since it would've been nice to take this... whatever this was… nice and slow while savouring each moment of it.
Break's hands slowly travelled down from their current position on Gilbert's shoulders, lightly brushing the tips of each fingers down his chest, stroking his sides with his palms, before pausing on the man's hips.
"I'm going to be his first..." realised Break, though it was a little belated considering how it all began and how they reached to this point. "No one else has ever seen him in this state. No one else has ever put him in this state. Not even… not even his Young Master."
For some reason, that thought gave him a strange sense of accomplishment.
"This perfect, unmarred body... I shall be the one to taint it."
Finally, Break let one of his hands slide lower… until it rested upon the source of Gilbert's troubles. The man immediately responded with a sudden jerk of his hips and a low groan. Break slowly began massaging him through his pants, storing each and every delicious sound of approval made by Gilbert in his memory. Break could feel him getting harder and soon he noticed the slight look of pain on Gilbert's face, brought on by the strain of his constricted pants.
With his other hand, he discreetly undid Gilbert's pants and pushed them aside, then proceeded to slide his underwear down. Gilbert yelped in embarrassment and for a moment Break thought he would push him away, so he quickly distracted the younger man by capturing his lips in another deep kiss.
Gilbert responded right away and with his attention diverted for now, Break uncovered the former's throbbing erection and lightly stroked the length with the tip of his finger. Gilbert trembled at the touch and his eyes fluttered shut, letting out a long sigh of satisfaction at being freed from the restraint of his clothing. Break repeated the action a few more times before gently enclosing his hand around the shaft, then started to pump his hands up and down at an excruciatingly slow pace. A shudder ran down his spine at how big and hard the other man already was just from some kissing.
Gilbert moaned into the kiss and bucked his hips, encouraging Break to speed up the pace. The latter used his thumb to rub the tip, prompting Gilbert to break the kiss and bury his burning face against Break's neck to muffle a cry of pleasure. Gilbert was panting heavily at each firm stroke and his face burned even hotter when he felt Break tease his slit, smearing the precum that was starting to gather there. Every now and then his hips would jerk forward shakily, and when this became more frequent, Break stopped completely.
There was a better way to satisfy the young Nightray.
Gilbert whined in disapproval at the lack of stimulation and attempted to glare at Break, but to the latter it seemed more like a pout than anything else. He couldn't hold back a chuckle at that and lowered himself until he was on his knees, shooting a sympathetic smile up at Gilbert.
"You don't think I was going to leave you unfinished, do you Gilbert?"
Said man felt a mix of embarrassment and annoyance at the way Break oh so casually spoke what was on Gilbert's mind, especially in such a smug manner. But before he had a chance to retort, Break reached up for Gilbert's hard-on with both hands before enclosing his mouth over the head, causing the young Nightray gasp breathily.
Slowly, Break managed to take the entire length into his mouth until it hit the back of his throat. His face flushed with a hot blush when his pants started to feel tight from experiencing just how big Gilbert really was, but he did his best to ignore it. Then, just as slowly as before, Break pulled back until only the tip was left in his mouth before pushing forward again, repeating this again and again until he established a steady rhythm.
Moans were spilling past Gilbert's lips one after another. The sensation of Break's hot, moist mouth gliding up and down his dick was clouding his mind with intense pleasure, making it harder and harder to cling onto a rational mindset. The lewd sucking noises Break was making wasn't helping either.
Moving one hand against the floor and the other around the base of Gilbert's erection, Break hollowed his cheeks and began sucking hard. Gilbert cried out in shock, clamping a hand over his mouth immediately to suppress any more loud noises. As hazy as his mind was, he somehow managed to remember where exactly they were and how late it was.
Gilbert cracked open an eye to gaze down at Break, whose face was quite flushed. Whether it was from embarrassment or from the effort, he couldn't tell.
"B-Break..." breathed Gilbert, but he was cut off when Break teased the slit of his dick with his tongue, making his breath hitch and brow furrow. "S-stop... Mmmh... Y-your mouth... That's… a-aaah...!"
Break opened his eye to look up at Gilbert, just as he sucked particularly hard while squeezing the base of his cock simultaneously. Gilbert immediately threw his head back and released a wanton moan, thrusting his hips forward instinctively. His hands snaked their way into Break's hair and gripped the silky silver locks firmly, doing his best not to tug too hard.
Seeing this as a sign of encouragement, Break picked up the pace. He rubbed his tongue against the throbbing organ in his mouth, pushing it deeper into his mouth until it hit the back of his throat. There was a sharp cry of pleasure from above and the hands in his hair tightened almost painfully as Gilbert felt himself approaching his end.
Gilbert was certain that there was no way he would last any longer if Break continued to do such amazing things with his tongue. A hot coil was tightening in his abdomen and his toes curled from the onslaught of pleasure. He was completely lost in the feeling, no other thought in his mind except the overpowering desire for release.
"Break!" gasped Gilbert, eyes flying open after one particularly hard suck. "I-I'm going to- haah..!"
Break hummed in acknowledgement, the vibrations from his voice emitting a breathless cry from Gilbert who was at his limit. He fisted Break's hair tightly, torn between pushing him away before he came or pulling him closer and having the man swallow his load…
Gilbert's eyes widened.
The very thought of releasing into that hot, wet mouth was Gilbert's undoing. He came with a hoarse cry of Break's name, hips jerking forward spastically as he rode out his orgasm. Gilbert's entire frame shook from the intensity of his release, mind going blank as a slate for several blissful seconds. Break held Gilbert's hips down to avoid suffocation and did his very best to swallow all the white, warm liquid flowing down his throat, but some of it still managed to spill onto the spotless carpet below.
Gilbert's orgasmic spasms subsided and Break slowly pulled back, wiping his mouth with his sleeve. By now Gilbert's knees had buckled and he slid down against the wall and onto the floor, panting heavily. Break, too, was still trying to catch his breath as he watched Gilbert, whose half-lidded gaze was trained aimlessly on the ceiling above. Upon seeing his deep red cheeks and tantalisingly moist lips, Break simply could not help himself and leaned forward, capturing those lips in a gentle kiss.
When they parted, Gilbert was staring at him with tired, empty eyes. There were some tears gathered in the corner of his eyes, Break noted as he stared back, feeling a bit unsettled all of a sudden. What was going through Gilbert's mind that very moment? For once he couldn't tell and that fact bothered him.
"Perhaps he's… thinking about him…"
When Gilbert's unnervingly blank gaze did not waver, Break had to look away. The spike of anxiety slowly faded away while both men caught their breath as he realised that there was no reason for any of this to be awkward. After all, they both knew very well that something like this was bound to happen eventually. They may not have gone all the way yet, but they weren't far from their goal now.
"One more step..." murmured Break, catching Gilbert's attention. "We're one more step away from our goal."
Gilbert had regained some semblance of composure by now and tried to make sense of Break's words, awareness slowly returning to him.
"…Is that so…"
Break briefly watched Gilbert who was still staring at the ceiling, seemingly deep in thought. He then stood up and stretched briefly before dusting down his pants. Gilbert noticed movement from the corner of his eye and suddenly snapped back to reality. Quickly fixing his own pants, he called out for Break. "W-wait, where are you-"
"To bed," answered Break simply.
Gilbert blinked. "But... don't you need help... w-with..." he vaguely gestured towards the general direction of Break's legs, too shy to explicitly point out the obvious bulge in the man's pants.
Despite the strain of supressing his lust, Break managed a smirk. That little session of theirs turned him on much more than it probably should have, but he would not rush into things. They would go as slow as they needed to avoid burdening Gilbert with more than he could handle.
Not that Break would tell him any of that.
"Oh? I didn't think you were still eager for more, Gilbert~"
Said man spluttered in shock. "N-no! That's not what I-!"
He was cut off when Break started chuckling, shaking his head at Gilbert's predictableness. "Thanks, but no thanks. You're clearly exhausted, and I'm not that unreasonable of a person. I'll handle it for tonight, so perhaps next time, hmm~?"
The young Nightray gulped. "Next time...?"
Break nodded, before turning to stare at Gilbert seriously. "Next time will be our final lesson. Next time, we will achieve our goal."
Gilbert's blinked in surprise, face turning scarlet at the implication of Break's words. "Y-you mean...?"
Break nodded. "We're going all the way."
There was a long silence between the two. An array of emotions swept through Gilbert and Break could see each and every one of them in those troubled golden eyes. So, to lighten the mood, Break said with a smirk, "But don't think for a second that you're going to top."
As expected, that statement had caught Gilbert's attention. "Wh-what?!" he spluttered, red faced. "I'm the one that has to… so I should…! I mean…" Gilbert trailed off, covering his burning face with his hands in mortification. Why did Break have to be so annoying?
"That's exactly why I'm going to top!" lilted Break. "You have to learn from what I do. That way, you will also get an idea of how your lover will react to what you do." All of a sudden his expression turned serious and he lowered his voice, no longer joking. "Your mission all depends on your partner's satisfaction with your performance. This way you'll have an idea of what to do and what not to do. The rest is up to you and how you feel you should act when the time comes."
Break turned on his heel with a light sigh. "Well, that's all in the future. For now, just clear your head and get some rest." He made his way for the door, pausing only to glance over his shoulder briefly.
"Goodnight."
Unlocking the door as quietly as he could, Break slipped out into the dark hallway before closing the door behind him just as silently, leaving Gilbert alone with his thoughts.
"The rest is up to you..."
It echoed in his mind again and again, making Gilbert shudder. For some reason, it sounded far more ominous than it should have. Also, from what he could tell, these dubious "lessons" of theirs would be ending quite soon if he could keep up with them. Gilbert knew he should've been somewhat glad that he no longer had to partake in these traitorous acts of intimacy any more, but for some reason he didn't. However, it wasn't as though he was disappointed either.
His heart was still as loyal to Oz as ever. But deep down Gilbert knew that it was almost impossible to be with his Master. So that day in the park when Break had first kissed him, Gilbert had asked himself...
Since Oz was out of the question… if he had to give up the physical aspects of love to anyone else, who would he be the most comfortable with choosing? He would think about it every now and then, and even now he was thinking about it.
Who? Who would he trust? Who could he trust?
Strangely, it always came down to Break at the end of the day.
Out of all the people, Break was the only one that truly knew Gilbert better than anyone else apart from his Master. He was the one that extended a helping hand to him when others turned their backs on him and Oz, shunning the possibility that the latter was actually alive. True, he did it for his personal gain, but Gilbert was always more than ready to overlook that fact if it meant having Oz back. In turn, Break overlooked the unimaginably tedious task of transforming Gilbert from a useless servant boy into a (somewhat) self-capable nobleman. No matter what troubled him, Break would take time to listen and, like recently, go out of his way just to resolve those troubles no matter what lengths he had to go through.
It wasn't love. It could never be. But if Gilbert had to give up something as precious as the physical aspects of love; something that was just as precious as its emotional counterpart, he always found that there was no one better to trust it with than Break. Sure, he had a tendency to play around far too much but he was just as reliable and trustworthy as he was irritating. And to Gilbert, Break was the most irritating person he knew.
Gilbert was neither happy nor sad. He didn't know what he was feeling. He didn't know how to feel.
He felt empty.
