Olivia sat at her desk staring at the blank screen across from her, millions of thoughts raced through her mind. She shuddered as she remembered the moments before she finally cracked and gave in to feelings that she had refused to let consume her for nearly 9 years. She shuddered as she remembered the sheer horror she'd felt as she thought she had lost him, Vickers had forced them to choose which one would die first. She remembered the look in Elliot's eyes as he grabbed her and pushed her behind him.

"Me." He told Vickers, angrily pushing Olivia further behind him. "let her go, you can do whatever you want to me. Just let her go," Vickers smiled. He could see then through a mirror like the one in the interview rooms in the 1-6. He had spoken to them through an intercom into the room. They heard a loud bang and knew he was gone.

"Elliot it is," with that they heard a door close, knowing it wouldn't be long before

"No, no." Olivia grabbed his shoulder, "Elliot, no don't do this. You...you have the kids...Kathy...please." she looked him in the eyes as tears filled her own. He shook his head,

"I can't leave you here," he could barely speak. She looked away from him,

"Elliot, there's still a chance we could get out of this, both of us. But one of us is getting out of here – it has to be you."she told him,

"How do you even know he'll let me go?" he asked, she bit her lip.

"I don't, but there's a chance. You have...you know it has to be me. You know it," she put her hands on his arm, he shook his head. "El, think of your kids," she gulped. She was terrified but she couldn't let him die. No one would miss her. She didn't have children at home, she didn't have a husband.

"I can't-"

"You have to, it's okay." She told him trying not to shake, he suddenly grabbed her and wrapped his arms around her, holding her tightly. She clung to him as she struggled not to cry.

"I can't let you do this, there's gotta be something-" he didn't let go of her as he spoke.

"No, no heroics, he'll kill you, I need for you to be okay, okay? I need you to be okay-"

"Liv, I can't." His voice broke as he heard the key in the door. He clung to her even tighter than before. "No," she heard him whisper, she closed her eyes and gently pushed him away from her. Vickers walked through the door holding a gun, they had been locked in the airtight room for over 12 hours, she hoped that he would shoot her rather than make her die in that way. There was a time when she thought they might both get out alive but after hearing him talk to them she realised one of them wouldn't and she knew it had to be her.

"I'm...I'm staying." Olivia told him trying to sound as brave as she could. She wondered if he could see her hands shaking, Vickers smiled. A sinister smile. Elliot knew exactly what was running through his head. He couldn't leave her. He knew Vickers would rape and kill his partner, Olivia looked at him and nodded. Vickers left the door open but had the gun trained on Olivia,

"You can go now Elliot." He said, both Olivia and Elliot looked up in surprise, "You walk out this door, you keep walking. Lock the door behind you." He told him, she nodded again and closed her eyes, she couldn't bear to watch him leave. Vickers looked up as Elliot didn't move, "Elliot, move." He told him,

"I...I can't." He stood where he was, "Liv, I'm not leaving you." Olivia opened her eyes,

"No, no, go." She told him, "Please we agreed, Elliot-"

"I can't leave you, I can't- I'm staying." He turned to Vickers, Olivia felt an overwhelming sense of panic, didn't he get it? She was doing this for him. To keep him safe. Tears filled her eyes again,

"No," she walked towards him and pushed him, "Elliot please," she tried to push him further and further towards the door. "You have to be safe-"

"No!" he angrily grabbed her upper arms, he had his back facing Vickers, "I can't leave you Liv," he looked strait into her eyes and without saying a word it suddenly became so real. She knew exactly why he wouldn't leave her, why he would never leave her. He stared straight at her, he couldn't leave her. He would rather die himself than loose her. He couldn't do it. Tears slid down her cheeks, they had almost forgotten Vickers was there. "I can't leave you," he told her again,

"This is touching it really is, how about I make it a bit easier?" he raised his arm and shot. Olivia screamed as Elliot jerked and fell into he. "Olivia, you can leave now you have 5 seconds." He told her,

"Go!" Elliot yelled as he struggled to breathe, the initial shock forcing him to his knees. Olivia openly sobbed as she sank to her knees, she shook her head.

"No, no, no," she grabbed him as he sank further to the ground. Before she knew it Vickers wasgone as she was openly sobbing as she held Elliot in her arms,

"I'm okay, I'm okay." He repeated, "You...you should've gone."

"I can't leave you," she cried, I need to...I need to stop the bleeding...you're going to be okay, it's...it's your shoulder, you're going to be fine," she tore off her shirt leaving her in a vest top.

**

The terror she had felt as she thought he was going to die still haunted her, she looked up as Elliot walked into the office. Her heart jumped a little bit as the butterflies in her stomach attacked again.

"Hey," he avoided eye contact with her, he sat across from her where he always had.

"Uh, Elliot-" she started quietly, he looked up at her. "How uh...how are the kids?" she asked, he gave her a confused glance.

"Fine," he looked back down. He raised his hand to his head, she remembered how he had cradled her face with his hand as she cried.

He was sat up against the wall, she was sat next to him. It had been hours since Vickers had shot her partner and she was still shaking.

"How you doing?" she asked, surprisingly he seemed okay.

"This is minor," he told her, she struggled to smile. He lifted his hand to her face, and cupped her cheek. His thumb wiped away a stray tear, "We're getting out of here," he told het gently,

"I thought you were dead," another tear fell, "You should have gone the door was open, you should have gone." She whispered, she could feel the air around her changing and she knew it wouldn't be much longer before the supply ran out.

"I couldn't leave you, I could never leave you." He spoke through the pain. He was lucky he hadn't been shot in the back, he knew Vickers had intended to kill him but luckily he was only wounded, another few hours and he knew it would be more serious but for now he was more worried about his partner, he wiped away the tears as they fell from her eyes. "I couldn't...I tried,"

"I know," she told him, she bit her lip. "I can't..." she stopped,

"I know," he told her, she looked at him. He looked into her eyes, he didn't know if it was the wound or the ever decreasing air but he did something he didn't even realise he had been wanting to do for years. He gently pulled her face closer to his. He pressed his lips against hers, she put her hand on his good shoulder to steady herself, completely overwhelmed. She opened her mouth to his as he deepened the kiss, he brought his hand from her cheek to around her waist to pull her closer. He couldn't let her go. She moaned into his mouth as he pulled her closer again.

Olivia was shaken from her daydream as Fin walked past, he smiled at her as he rushed to wherever he was going, she had to talk to Elliot. She knew he would understand. He had kissed her, she responded, but he kissed her first. She knew he was embarrassed and regretted it, but they couldn't ignore each other forever.

"Elliot?" she called his name again.

"What?" he asked abruptly, she suddenly lost all of her courage.

"Forget it," she stood up and walked away leaving him alone. He closed his eyes, he knew he was being an ass. He didn't want to hurt her, hell he missed her. He missed her so much that if he let her in again even a tiny but he wouldn't be able to get her out of his head. He was married. He had beautiful children, he couldn't do this. He remembered the feeling of her underneath him. He shook his head, he had thought about nothing else when he first woke up in the hospital. It took him weeks to forget her smell, forget the feel of her hands on his chest. Her lips on his. It took him even longer to convince himself it was just an act of desperation. He couldn't let her in again. He knew he couldn't survive if he let her in, his marriage would be over. He hated being so horrible to her but he didn't have a choice, he knew she would understand eventually. Eventually she would forget what happened. And if he wasn't around her she had nothing around her to remind her...then they could get back to normal, he knew it would happen. He just needed to forget completely, and so did she. He had no doubt in his mind that eventually they would move on from this, maybe even forget it had ever happened...