The Full Force of Time
Cezille07
A/N: I'm sorry, more than sorry, for keeping you waiting. Je présente...le deuxième chapitre. ;D
Chapter 2. They Don't...Because They Can't.
The evening air bit with a horrid sting. The damp grass under the backyard tree leaked the cold into what was once enough as a single layer of thick fur, and Perry shuddered a little. He didn't want to have to see the old clock again, mocking his inability to see as clearly as before. But judging solely by temperature, about sixty degrees Fahrenheit, it was about past midnight. The time when even the busiest streets slowed down for a few hours' break, and the most tireless of children travelled into a paradise of dreams.
He sighed. The empty moon smiled sadly upon his limp, restless form. Perry curled up as tightly as he could against himself. What am I doing here? Phineas and Ferb had probably been waiting for me the whole day.
No sooner than he finished the thought phrase, the wooden backdoor creaked open, and the boys emerged wearing their pajamas.
"Oh, there you are, Perry," said Phineas, his voice colored with relief and sleepiness, as he and Ferb took seats on opposite sides of the platypus. "Ferb was starting to worry you had run off again, but I told him you'd never leave. Isn't that right?" he finished in a smile.
Perry relaxed. There was the question of what they were doing awake at the hour. But at least they knew he was a permanent part of this family, that he belonged in this exceptional, suburban house no matter what.
"But don't tell me you've been sitting here all this time; that's totally against our anti-boredom summer campaign," Phineas gestured with his arms. "We've been seizing the short time we've been given and you just sit here—go off and come back from someplace we have yet to discover—and do nothing. Not that we're complaining, of course, we know you're just a platypus."
...'Just' a platypus...?
"What's wrong, Perry? You're looking a little sad."
Perry looked up at Phineas, then at Ferb. He couldn't tell them if he wanted to, even if they'd wanted him to. But there was something in their earnest, grown-up looks that always rested his guard...
Ferb began stroking Perry's furry back, and the little mammal released a sigh. "Phineas, he's cold," said the elder brother.
"Want some milk, Perry?" offered the younger, instantly on his feet. "C'mon, we'll get you some."
Perry crawled into Ferb's arms, and the latter continued the stroking while Phineas led the way inside, heated some milk on a small pan, and poured it into Perry's bowl.
"Aww, isn't he cute when he's lapping up that milk?" commented Phineas after they had set up their pet at the end of the dining table. Ferb gave a chanced grin and replied, "He always is."
The platypus made no visible response to this. But ten minutes later, as he lay motionless on Ferb's bed, sandwiched between the two boys embracing each other, he settled that it was a remarkable moment. They both said they loved him before dozing off. And yet, strangely, the sinking feeling in his chest hadn't vanished at all.
"Vanessa, honey, I'll be back for you this weekend. Promise me you'll behave, alright?"
The teenager rolled her eyes. "Yeah, sure, mom, whatever."
Charlene got out of the driver's seat and opened the trunk. "Are you gonna get your own stuff or shall I call room service?"
Vanessa groaned. If there was one thing she hated, it was having to waste weekends with her ridiculous father. And now Charlene expected her to be a good girl and sit tight with that evil freak for longer than the legally-settled two days. A full week, almost. Without moving from the passenger seat, she grumbled, "Tell me again why you desperately want to join this outreach?"
"It's for charity! And besides, the entire cooking class is going! Right after this I'll pick up Linda and we'll go together to that orphanage. We'll make healthy meals for the kids, and teach them a little of good eating while we're at it," the mother explained eagerly. "I wish you could join me, dear."
"I wish I could find some better thing to do than waste away in this dump, but cooking just ain't my thing," muttered Vanessa. She kicked open the car door to stalk irritably to her mother, haul her bags, and dump them on the sidewalk.
"Honey?" Charlene tapped her shoulder.
Now you want a goodbye kiss? Not in this lifetime. "You're gonna be late. See you."
Perry was fiddling with his trusty computer watch.
But that Saturday, it was anything but trusty.
He hadn't tried using it since the big resign; it shouldn't have startled him if he had done that right away, but it didn't cross his mind. Why won't you work? he asked it, tapping the miniscule button that was supposed to bring up the holographic keyboard and screen. Nothing.
"Hey, where's Perry?"
Two shadows came around the corner, and the split second before the boys appeared, Perry used to shift his mindset—I'm just a regular platypus.
"Oh, there you are," breathed Phineas. Turning to Ferb, he added, "Well, that was fast."
Perry looked up at his two owners. Fast? It was inherent routine for all those summers! He couldn't remember a single time they had almost caught him. Nor could he remember being cut off just like so from the OWCA.
"Y'know, I've been wondering," Phineas said, kneeling down to pet the platypus, "this entire week...Perry hasn't been disappearing at all."
That's not so bad, is it?
"You know what I mean? It's...the unalterable flow of nature. Every day of summer, we're supposed to note at some point in the day he's turned up at some other end of the universe for all we know," the redhead addressed Perry.
Vanessa opened the door to her father's residence, high up inside the infamous DEI building, and was, for the first time in a long while, amused by what she saw.
"Nice Inator," she said, indicating the awkward shape of the large mechanism in the middle of the room. "So, what does it do?"
"Oh, my baby girl, look at you! You're here! And it's not even a weekend yet," Heinz greeted, running to his daughter.
"Didn't mom tell you? She's on this outreach which should last until the weekend. She said she'll pick me up then." The girl avoided her father's weak attempts at embracing her, and pressed, "Ahem, so the invention?"
"Right, this old thing." He swallowed. "I invented it because...well, I don't remember exactly. I was brooding about something terribly depressing, so I created the Despair-inator! Whoever is happier than me shall suffer being hopelessly sad!"
"Interesting. Now, why is it shaped like a hat?"
Both of them looked at the machine, wordless for a full minute.
"I...don't remember exactly," Heinz uttered. "I know I was brooding about it the whole day yesterday..."
Right then, Lawrence walked into the backyard with a stack of dusty books. "Hello, boys! What're you doing today?"
"We haven't decided so far," answered Phineas. "How 'bout you, dad?"
"See these old volumes? The library has owed me this collection for ages, only it seems to have been excessively borrowed these days," Lawrence told them. "I just dropped by and finally they were available! I'm a lucky bloke, aren't I? But I'd better get reading, a week is a short time for ten encyclopedias on monotreme evolution."
"Wow, monotremes?"
"Perry's one," Ferb noted.
"Well, dad, speaking of platypuses..." Phineas paused, looking at Perry. "Maybe you can help us figure out why Perry isn't off to his great adventures yet."
"What do you mean?" asked their father, but he already set down his burden on the grass and crouched for a good look at the platypus.
"He's just been here, living out the appropriate definition of platypus activity, the 'they don't do much' part. Perry, as we know him, is a bit more 'mysterious' with regard to his disappearing feats," Phineas elaborated, watching his father.
"Oh, worry not, he's fine," Lawrence smiled, gently patting Perry before standing up. "You see, Perry is a platypus. Like any creature...they have an expected...life span."
"Life span?" chorused the boys.
"A bit over ten years. You remember when we got Perry, don't you? You boys were toddlers and he was just fresh out of his egg. I can't remember a happier group than the three of you staring at each other for whole afternoons. But now—I've got to get to these books," the adult excused himself. "We'll have lunch in an hour, 'kay?"
"...Life span?" Phineas said in awe, "B-but Perry's immortal!" He wondered if the horrified look he wore was that obvious, and if Ferb was also seeing the similarly shocked expression on Perry's face.
Vanessa removed the earphones and observed the striking silence. Something was off. She got out of bed and took a peek outside her old room. "Dad?" she called. There was no answer.
She wandered into the living room, out the hallway, and in her father's bedroom. Empty. She exhaled. There was only one place left, and that was the 'evil' lair, one floor up.
She would have laughed aloud some other time, but Heinz was rocking himself, curled up in fetal position beside what used to be the Despair-inator, which had now become a gigantic watch. Upon closer inspection—yes, he was doing it!—the full shame of thumb-sucking.
"This...is humiliating. I'll be back when you're evil again," Vanessa declared to the distraught man. Her quick steps carried her outside the large room, but not before Heinz cried out, "Wait, Vanessa, I am evil!"
And in that moment, his daughter was a terrifying reminder of Charlene, hands on her waist, and using that very tone of voice. "Okay, then what's this act you're putting up?"
He straightened himself and cleared his throat. "Well, you remember my nemesis, Perry the platypus? He isn't here yet..."
"...And?"
"Well, if there's no one to foil my evil schemes...where's the fun in that?"
"Ugh! You are such a failure!" Vanessa finally yelled. "You're...you're a rag! A dirty, old, useless rag!"
"You—how dare you? My own flesh and blood...?" Heinz crossed his arms. "Okay okay, you're right..." he sighed, "I...I've got to find him."
The teenager rolled her eyes.
"Don't you roll your darling eyes, young lady, you're coming with me!"
Monogram stood before the large monitor, and grinned. The screen was divided into sixty-four smaller blocks, each showing a live video feed of Doofenshmirtz's building from the many hidden cameras outside.
"Now, Carl, what did I tell you about the Doof? He hasn't left his turf in days. And not a single online purchase, just like I predicted. He stopped the moment he realized Agent P isn't coming," he gloated.
Carl wiped his sweaty brows with the sleeve of his uniform. He missed working the camera for Monogram and Perry, but lately, the most work he'd been doing concerned hardware removal, rendering all of Perry's cleverly hidden shortcuts to the lair inaccessible. Just now, he finished applying the remote signal remover to the last gadget Perry owned, the computer watch.
"Or maybe Dr. Doofenshmirtz just felt like doing nothing," the intern suggested timidly.
"Nonsense! Psycho minds don't work that way."
"I beg to differ, but he's not a psycho. Deep down, he's just a sad, maltreated boy."
"I'm not paying you to sympathize with the enemy!"
"Well, technically, you're not paying me at all—"
"Just get back to work and make sure there's no way for Agent P to contact us ever again!" Monogram crossed his arms, grinning smugly. Espionage was a secret profession. The protocol with old files? Burn them, and burn their ashes. The protocol for old agents? Well, Perry was professional; they didn't have to, but removing the passages was just a safeguard for the agency. And with Doofenshmirtz behaving, things were indeed much better than he initially expected. "If all continues well...we'll take the week off," he called to his subordinate, "a long week off."
Perry whiled away time by staring at the rock nearest his bill. Life span this, life span that. Phineas had gone on the whole morning about his age. He hissed at the rock. He wasn't going anywhere...
"Perry, Perry? Where are you, boy? Ferb and I want to show you something," Phineas called. They both came out into the backyard carrying large, new blueprints. "We've got a great idea for how you can spend these final years in comfort. Perry?"
'Final years'—what are you talking about? Perry ducked under the garden hose and waited.
The brothers paused three feet away. "Hmm, he couldn't have left now. Anyway, we'll have what's left of his life to send him back to his natural habitat. Home is where anyone should be spending their final months...or days..." Phineas trailed off.
Perry clenched his fists, groaning silently; only the hose seemed available to clobber. 'Home'? But this is my home, with you both! I don't want to go back to those people who killed off my family and sent me here! Phineas, why?
"Oh well. I guess we should check upstairs." Phineas led the way, Ferb following in step.
There was a clunk from inside; Perry didn't care what it was—he didn't want to know. If only Candace hadn't moved to her dormitory early for college, she'd be ahead of him in telling Lawrence what outrageous schemes they were brewing. It couldn't be worse than any of Doofenshmirtz's—
Doofenshmirtz! The idea was insane, but right now, anything was better than getting shipped back to Australia.
"We'll find him..."
"Eventually, you mean," scowled Vanessa. The wind whipping her hair into her face was dry and warm; noontime had descended, but their drawn-out, scooter-borne search had so far yielded nothing. "I so should have gone with mom on that cooking outreach," she sighed.
Heinz said nothing, his head flicking left and right in a raring lookout for Perry.
"How do you even know he's still here in Danville? If he's quit on you—"
"He hasn't!" yelled Heinz. Vanessa received the cold glare he sent through the back of his dirty-white helmet. He didn't have to actually look at her. She felt the indignant fervor radiating from him, pulsing angrily—at her, at the apparent heat of the day, at the uneven asphalt that slowed their speed. "I just know, okay?" the doctor continued irritably, and it almost worked: he managed to silence her, but as for convincing himself...
"Hmph." Vanessa crossed her arms. There was little use arguing with her father in this state; he was, as far as she knew, the only one more stubborn than herself. "Well good luck," she groaned, casting the neat line of residences around them a bitter glance. "Hang on—"
"Perry the platypus?" clamored her father, bringing their vehicle to a terse halt.
"No, ugh! Just leave me alone! I'm going to see an old friend," yelled Vanessa, but she had already hopped off the back of the scooter and was heading for a yellow house to their left.
Heinz grumbled as he restarted the engine, but it wouldn't power up. "Curse this old thing," he muttered under his breath. Leave the 'failure', leave the 'rag'. Always the most considerate of people, she is. He kicked the tires, and the entire scooter fell into pieces. "Perfect!" he grunted, pocketing his hands. He looked at the long road ahead. He had barely covered a quarter of the Tri-state area, and Perry could be anywhere...
Releasing the loudest scream he could muster, he picked up the front wheel and hurled it at the end of the street. "Perry the platypus, where are you?"
The wheel bounced twice before rolling unsteadily away from him. He watched its wobbly motion until it knocked against a small animal that had abruptly crossed the street—
An animal with striking, turquoise fur.
A/N: Bad Phineas! Bad Phineas! (And Ferb too, by extension.) How dare you make Perry run away? When will you realize that you're not the only ones who could love him? Answer is: next chapter! Stick around 'til then, and in the meantime, please review! ;D
