A rut. There was no other word for it.

Astrid sat on their new blue armchair, the only piece of furniture they'd bought since the move, with her forehead plastered against the chilled window. The sun had vanished behind the thick gray clouds, again, and a winter breeze whistled through the changing leaves. It was a beautiful autumn scene, and it would have been much more attractive if she were in a better mood.

Hiccup still had four hours before he would be home.

Astrid sighed and her breath fogged up the glass. She didn't like Maine very much at all. Hiccup worked over nearly every night, not getting home until six or seven, and she had stopped making dinner. After the first few weeks of waiting for him at five thirty only to be disappointed and staring over their small plastic kitchen table as her food cooled, she stopped putting herself in that position altogether. She'd eaten out more and she felt it in her jeans.

Hiccup probably noticed. Was that why he worked over? Was there a cute, skinny girl in the next cubicle or down the hall?

Astrid inhaled sharply and leaned away from the glass. She'd been here nearly four months and had yet to make a new friend. She tried when she went shopping but no one seemed the least bit interested in meeting someone knew. She didn't share their accent, Hiccup had commented.

She wasn't like them. Different. Foreign. A stranger.

Of course, if it hadn't been for Heather she wouldn't have made many friends at all.

She sighed. She missed Heather. After graduation she had moved to New York for a while, spent a month in Paris with a girl she'd met, then came running back when that relationship had gone sour. The last Astrid knew, Heather lived in Chicago with a new boyfriend. She had such an adventurous life.

Astrid reached for her phone, just out of her comfortable perch. Her thumb quickly swished and swiped until Heather's name popped up.

What's up? She waited until the phone screen darkened.

Heather worked at the Art Institute. She, like Hiccup, had other things to do than sit around her apartment.

Astrid groaned and let the phone slide out of her hand and to the floor. She'd applied for several jobs, but none of them had bitten. Apparently, a degree didn't get her that far. At least, Hiccup had said, she didn't have student loan dept to worry about. He had another two months before he would start paying on his.

Hiccup paid for the apartment. Hiccup paid her car insurance and bought the gas. He bought the groceries. He paid her phone bill.

"What about your health insurance?" Hiccup had asked when her funds had run dry.

"I don't have any." She'd crossed her arms.

"You know that's bad, right?" Hiccup raised a brow. "What if you get sick or something and I have to take you to the doctor or the emergency room? They'll kick you out."

She shrugged. "I'll be fine. I'll wash my hands extra this winter."

Alvin had always taken care of that. He had his network and he'd taken care of her. She was on her own now. And she was failing.

Her phone beeped and she raced to it. Heather's name glowed across the screen.

I'm taking a sick day. A bug brought me down.

Sorry to hear that. Astrid watched her little message float up, and then added another, grateful for someone else to talk to. Anything new?

Josh wants to go to law school. He's worse than I was. Yesterday he wanted to be a chef.

Astrid smiled without knowing it. She wished that Heather had moved with her, or she with Heather. She missed her bittersweet company and her bright honesty.

At least lawyers are rich.

True, I've always wanted a yacht. How goes it with you and your man?

Her thumb hesitated over the keys. No immediate response came. Good.

Was that hesitation?

Astrid shook her head. Even in a text, Heather saw through her. I don't see him much anymore. He's always working and I'm always sitting at home. I'm getting fat.

Haha, it would take a lot to make you fat. You could join a gym, meet some people.

She could. I'd have to ask Hiccup for the money.

And…you don't want to?

No! Astrid had huffed, and the sound in the quiet apartment made her feel silly.

I take it the job hunt isn't going so well?

No. I had an interview about a month ago, but the manager was a total bitch. She kept glaring and being snippy. She said being a waitress wasn't a skill, and I might have said something like 'being a bitch isn't either' and I didn't get the job.

Yeah…you might not want to insult the person hiring you.

Astrid sighed. It seemed that everyone in Maine acted that way. Too good to associate with a girl like her.

You know what you need?

What?

A change. Why not do something different with your hair? Or just get it done? It always makes me feel like a million bucks.

Astrid glanced out of the window to the shops down the street. Maybe.

X

"I have a hair appointment tomorrow," Astrid announced as Hiccup ate a meager dinner, tacos he'd picked up on his way home. He had gotten used to no dinner, too.

"Oh?" he said with a mouthful.

"I'm not sure what I'm doing yet," Astrid hummed, pulling on a loose strand of hair.

Hiccup swallowed and his entire throat moved. He licked his lip. "Are you going to dye it?"

"I don't know," Astrid said. She imagined a different color in the strand between her fingers, maybe a chestnut or strawberry blonde or something in between.

"Don't." Hiccup's blunt tone surprised her. His eyes held hers for a moment and he added, "I like the color it is."

"Oh?" Astrid let go of the strand. He'd never said that before.

"Yeah," he nodded. He took a large bite from his fast-food taco. "It's pretty."

She ran her tongue over her teeth. "How was work?"

He groaned. "The same. A lot of Excel. I thought there'd be more computers involved, you know? I feel like all I do is sit at the desk. I'm a paper-pusher."

Astrid smiled. Even when down, tired, and defeated he still looked adorable.

"I don't know," Hiccup said when his taco was gone. "I've just been thinking…"

"What?" She asked.

He sighed. For a moment she saw a glimmer of fear in his eye. He shook his head. "It's nothing, don't worry about it."

She frowned. "Well, of course I'm going to worry about it now."

Hiccup sighed heavily. "I've been thinking…maybe this wasn't the right choice."

Silence magnified the movement of their downstairs neighbor. A car drove by with a thumping bass. Somewhere in the distance a siren blared.

"Is it that bad?" Astrid asked, trying to maintain a calm exterior for his sake.

"It's not the job I thought. It's boring and all the people there are…I don't like them. It's like they are going out of their way to make me feel unwanted. They've already got their friends, they don't need another one." Hiccup held a second taco in his hand, still wrapped, and he set it down on the table.

Astrid nearly tripped on the table leg as she pounced from her seat and landed awkwardly in Hiccup's arms. He'd barely thrown them up in time to catch her. She threw her arms around him and hugged him as tight as she could. Their grip didn't hold and her knees hit the floor. She grip his shirt as she looked up at him.

"We don't have to stay here," she said.

"Then what will we do?" Hiccup said. "I can't just quite…we can't afford that. I-I don't know what to do."

"We'll figure it out, babe." Astrid leaned in closer and snaked her arms around him. "Wherever you want to go, I'll follow."

A brief, kind smile stretch along his tired face and his youthful brightness returned, only to be quenched by his exhaustion. He leaned forward and touched her face, placing his forehead against hers.

"I love you, Astrid." He kissed her.

"I love you, too." She smiled against his greasy lips. His breath smelled like tacos.

X

Astrid half-ran back to the apartment to keep out of the rain. Her shoes were soaked and the water seeped into her socks, squishing as she ran. The newspaper she held above her head quickly disintegrated. By the time she reached the foyer of the apartment building the paper had turned to gray mush. She dropped it outside.

She shook as she mounted the stairs and carefully stepped up to their floor. Everything was soaked. Once inside her apartment she shed her wet jacket and kicked off her wet shoes and pulled the sloppy socks from her cold feet.

"Oh, wow," Hiccup's voice started her.

"Shit!" She fell against the door and slipped in the growing puddle at her feet.

"Are you alright?" Hiccup rushed over. He wore his pajamas and a sweatshirt.

"I'm fine," Astrid said as she gripped his extended hand. Her heart raced. "What are you doing home? Did you quite? Did you get fired?"

"No, no, I, uh…got sick this morning."

Astrid withdrew her hand from his.

"No, I'm pretty sure it was food poisoning." He half-laughed. His smiled widened. "You hair looks nice."

"Oh, thank you," Astrid said. She'd nearly forgotten. She brought hands up to her shortened hair. "It looked a lot nicer before it got rained on."

"I think it looks good," Hiccup smiled. He stepped over to kiss her on the cheek.

Astrid discarded her wet clothes in the bathroom to dry. She stopped at the vanity to see the damage of the rain water on her hair. It had been a quick decision and one that she still felt uncertain about. Her long locks now ended just past her shoulder and had been done up in curls that she could never produce on her own. Thanks to the gallon of spray, many of them still remained.

"What's up?" Hiccup asked from the bathroom doorway.

"It's different," Astrid said, both hands in her hair.

"That's what you wanted, isn't it?" He asked. She could see him on the edge of the mirror. His eyes weren't on her hair, but her unclothed backside. He probably wondered when it had gotten bigger.

"I suppose it was," Astrid said to her reflection more than to him. "It will just take some getting used to."

His eyes moved when she moved.

"Are you going to pretend like you weren't staring?" Astrid smiled.

"What?" He shrugged. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Mm-hm," Astrid touched his face.

His smile quickly evaporated and rough hands grabbed her waist and half-lifted her into the hallway.

"Hey," Astrid began to complain, but he shut himself into the bathroom.

"Sorry!" Hiccup shouted on the other side. "Food poisoning!"

She sighed and stepped into the bedroom for fresh, dry clothes that weren't covered in tiny hairs.