The Best Is Yet To Come

Verse 1

How d'you do, I see you've met my faithful Potions man.

He's just a little brought down because when you knocked

He thought you were the Boogeyman.

Don't get strung out by a stupid book

Don't judge Hogwarts: A History by its cover

I'm not much of a man in the ministry

But in Hogwarts I'm one hell of a lover

Chorus

I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Malfoy Manor, in Surburbia

Verse 2

So let me show you a spell, maybe let you show me aswell

You look like you're both pretty nifty

Or if you want something frothing with Snape behind you scoffing

We could take you to the labs in a shifty

"Erm, Mr. Malfoy? 'Mione and I just want to go home; we're both in a bit of a hurry," said Ron nervously interrupting the song sparking furious glares from all involved.

"I was under the impression that you were stuck here for the night Weasley? Your car is after all rather…wet," slurred Lucius, turning to Hermione as he said 'wet' making her blush furiously. He flipped his legs graciously off of the thrones arms and strutted past them. He arrived at the doors to the Great Hall and turned quickly on his heels, once again facing the unnerved couple.

"Why don't you come down to the lab and see what's on the slab?" Ron shivered. "Oh yes, I see you shiver with antici….pation. What you will see may change your mind; removing the cause of your uneasiness, but not the symptom!"

Lucius banged the doors shut at this last word and Ron and Hermione were left feeling very uncomfortable and wishing to get out of the castle immediately. What had once been their safe haven had now become a hunting lodge for a rich weirdo. The three servants to Lucius crept up behind the young couple before making a great show of cleaning them up. Snape proceeded to strip Hermione down to her underwear who just stood there in shock, ignoring the fact that his hands lingered a little longer over her curves than they should have done. Remus, seeing this cruel comeback for the incident with Sirius earlier, took a prolonged time in stripping Ron down to his boxers, making sure to kneel down in front of his crotch whilst removing his trousers. Snape chucked Hermione's clothes onto Sirius's outstretched arm and stormed off to get the wine his master required.

"You're very lucky to be invited down to the dungeons, some people would give their right arm for the privilege. Even suffer indignities for it," again Sirius winked at Remus as he said this and again Remus blushed and scuttled off after Snape.

"Sirius what happened? You used to be so cool! Now you're dressed as a woman!" exclaimed Ron as he looked at Sirius incredulously. Sirius only laughed, throwing the couples clothes to the floor. Hermione bent to retrieve something to cover herself with but before she could the clothes magically disappeared. Ron tried desperately to look everywhere but at Hermione. His eyes strayed towards her cleavage and he felt a tingling in his groin which would be very difficult to hide given the circumstances.

"Think off-putting thoughts…off-putting thoughts…naked Hagrid…Dumbledore and McGonagall doing it…ergh that worked," sighed Ron with relief. He walked with Hermione to the doors and then the two followed Snape, Remus and Sirius down the dark winding steps towards the lab.