Richard O'Brien, the almighty God, owns everything. Please don't sue 'cause I'm poor :) Thanks for all the reviews and sorry for keeping it so long before re-posting. Anyway here's chapter two, enjoy :)

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The ship was tiny, like the size of an average Earth car. It was hard trying to squeeze them all in nowadays but they simply couldn't afford a new one. It shuddered as it travelled and the engine constantly spluttered and threatened to die out. Riff Raff and Magenta hoped they would not be chased during their journey as they were sure the old ship would not survive such attack.

Half an hour into the journey and the prospect of an easy travel looked promising. Switching over to cruise control Riff Raff left his place at the wheel and went to sit with his family. Ember had managed to persuade Titan to play rock, paper and scissors (an Earthling game her parents had taught her) and Magenta still held Troy in her arms. Phineas was hiding in the luggage compartment as Basta, Mortimer and Trixie prowled eagerly below him.

"I think nows the time we explained" Riff Raff said, sitting down around the small table.

"Finally" Titan grumbled. Riff Raff ignored him and continued on.

"You see, your mother and I are ... siblings" He explained. Magenta looked at her children with an uneasy smile.

"What does that mean?" Ember asked. The girl was only young and did not carry the intelligence of her father and brother.

"It means ve are brozher and sister. Like you, Titan and Troy" Magenta explained.

"You mean we're fucking inbreeds?" Titan asked.

"Language Titan! And please don't use zhat term" Magenta scolded.

"Anyway, the Furters have found out and we face arrest if we do not go to Earth" Riff Raff finished.

"So we can't go back?" Ember asked tearfully, "What about all my friends?"

"Ve're sorry darling, but no I don't zink we can go back" Magenta replied.

"So what? We go to this Earth and hide like cowards?" Titan spat.

"You don't know the half of what the Furters' are like! They'd kill us" Riff Raff replied angrily, "So if you're finished making ignorant comments, I'm going back to the control room!" He added.

"Why do you always have to cause arguments, Titan?" Ember hissed after he father had gone.

"Oh shut up you bastard ballerina!" Titan snapped.

Six hours later

There was one advantage of the size of the ship; it was easy to hide. Riff Raff parked it neatly behind a particularly large and thick clump of trees in the forest. He remembered doing the same thing all those years ago when, at the age of eighteen and Magenta at the age of thirteen, he had done the very same thing. Only this time they didn't have a moaning transvestite on board.

It was the early hours of the morning and the sky was a light indigo. The sky of Transexual only had two shades; a dull grey during the 'day' hours and a deep black during the 'night' hours. But here on Earth it attained many different colours. Riff Raff also remembered the first couple of months of arriving on the planet when he had gazed out of his tower window at the wonderous sky. Magenta thought it was pretty too but she didn't have the patience her brother did and so couldn't look at it for as long without fidgeting.

Once they were all on the mossy ground, clutching their bags and animals, Riff Raff lead them through the forest. As they emerged they say they had landed near a farm. They trudged through the corn field they made their way to the barn. Making sure no one was about they went inside.

It was quite a large barn, holding a flock of sheep and two cows. Ember walked around the strange animals, wanting to reach out and touch them. There was a pair of ladders centred in the middle of the barn which rose up into a hole in the ceiling. The second story was empty except for bundles beyond bundles of hay. Stooping under the low ceiling they settled down amongst it. They had been too nervous to sleep on the journey and were still tired after the lack of sleep they had had before.

It seemed they had only been asleep for an hour or so when Riff Raff became aware they weren't alone. He opened his eyes and froze as he saw the barrel of a shot gun just millimetres away from his nose. He slowly rose into a seated position. An old man with tufts of grey hair and a fat red face was glaring at him with piggy eyes.

"Well, well, well ... what have we here?" He asked.

There was a shriek as Ember awoke to see the scene before her. Magenta pulled her children towards her and backed into the corner of the room fearfully. The Alsations growled and guarded their mistress and her children. Riff Raff felt anger burn inside him as he felt the terror the unpleasant looking man was putting his family in.

"Who are you and what the hell are you doing in my barn? I should call the police! This is private property" The man, who they guessed to be the farmer, shouted.

"Lower your tone and put down your weapon, then I shall kindly answer your questions" Riff Raff replied calmly.

"I won't take orders from a man with a banana on his head!" The farmer growled.

"That is actually my hair. And I won't take orders from a man with a tomato for a nose, though I don't really like putting unkind personal comments into discussion" Riff Raff said.

"Will you stop that! With your bloody big words..." The farmer muttered.

"We'll be going now. We shan't bother you again. Thank you for your ... hospitality" Riff Raff announced. He stood and beckonded for the others to follow him back down the ladder. But before he could follow them, he felt the gun being stabbed into his chest.

"You're not going anywhere! My wife has called the police and they'll be here soon" The farmer sneered.

"Look, I've tried to be calm and reasonable but if you're going to poke guns at me..." And with that sentence Riff Raff thrust his fist forward. Unprepared for the attack the old man fell to the floor, knocked out cold. But not before he had jerked and pulled down the trigger. Riff Raff ducked as the bullet flew into the air and shot through the roof.

"Riff? Vhats going on up zhere?" Magenta yelled from below.

"Nothing darling, I'll be right down" Riff Raff called back. He looked up at the small hole in the ceiling and joined his family.

"Ve better get going if his wife has phoned ze police..." Magenta said.

"There's no need for that. He lied. He doesn't have a wife at all" Riff Raff replied, holding the door open so they could leave.

"How do you know?" Magenta asked.

"No woman, or man, in their right mind would marry that fool. And I remember him from when I used to go man hunting with Frank, some times we used to go to the pub in the village and he was always there. He's never been married in his life" Riff Raff explained.

"Man hunting?" Ember repeated.

"Frank?" Titan chimed in.

"Zhats a story for anozher time" Magenta said quickly, she glared at her brother for being so careless with his words.

"We might as well take residence in the farmer's house now. He won't be needing it any more" Riff Raff suggested with a grin.

"Riff!" Magenta cried, "You didn't...?"

"Oh yes I did" Riff Raff replied. And Magenta couldn't help but laugh.

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Hope you liked it. Please review if you have read! Don't be afraid to add a bit of constructive crictism :) By the way the farmer is dead :o