Chapter 2: Secrets
It's one in the morning and Bianca's still up. Her eyes are watery and red as she continues to cry in her room. Her aunt is long gone now, most likely spending a night with her friends. She cries so much that her voice becomes hoarse, then she forces herself to get up and look in the mirror. She takes her robe off, and she sees the lacy red bra and underwear that she's wearing, but she doesn't care about that right now. She looks at her tanned stomach and her curvy hips, and she can't believe that there's a baby living inside of her. The worst thing is that she has no one to talk to. She has no one to share this little secret with, she has no one that can help her. And suddenly she has an urge to call the one person who has been there for her since before Degrassi. Fitz.
She walks back over to her bed, and she picks up her cellphone that's decorated with rhinestones and gems that she put together herself. She dials his number, not even having to check her contacts to know it. She's dialed his number so many times that it's stuck in her brain now. The phone rings and she feels her fingers shaking. By the third ring, he picks up his phone, and she can hear someone screaming.
"Where the fuck do you think you're going!" A rough voice screams, and Bianca sighs, truly feeling sorry for her best friend.
Fitz sighs over the phone, "What's up Bee? It's one in the morning, what are you doing up?"
Bianca ignores his questions, "Parents fighting again?"
"Yeah...but you know they always do. I'm just thankful that my stepbrother isn't here. Because if he was, we both know that I wouldn't be able to get to the phone right now." Fitz let's out a dry laugh, but Bianca can feel that he's holding back from how he's really feeling.
"I hate that he does that to you Fitz...how come you never tell anyone?" Bianca asks him for the first time, with true concern in her voice.
"What the fuck is wrong with you Bee? You're being so...nice. Any other time you would tell me to beat his ass or something and stop being a wimp, though I know you don't mean it." He tells her, and she feels her heart racing.
"Es nada." She tells him, but no matter what language she uses, he knows that somethings wrong.
"Tell me what's up Bee. We don't hide shit from each other. I promise I won't tell. Not even Owen." He pleads, and she feels herself breaking down.
"Meet me after school at your job, and we'll talk then. I wish you hadn't gotten kicked out." Bianca says, feeling more tears roll down her eyes.
"Before I would have said that it was that stupid kid Eli's fault. But I'm a change person now, so I've learned to let it go." Fitz tells her, and she can't help but scoff.
"You don't really expect me to believe that you're a Christian do you? Come on Fitz, I know you just wanted to fuck with Clare but since it didn't work out, could you just give up the whole Christian act?" She says, wondering why Fitz has kept up his act for so long.
"It's not an act...I do believe in Him Bee. I admit, at first I was doing it so I could be with Clare. I mean, she's hot. But anyone can see that Eli has her wrapped around his little finger, so there's no way it would work out...Do you believe in Him?" Fitz asks her, and she lets out a dark laugh.
"Please don't preach to me. And you know I don't believe in Him. It's a stupid faith that people who are afraid of dying force themselves to believe, just so that it makes death a little more...comforting." She tells him, and she lets out yet another laugh.
Fitz sighs, "This is serious Bianca...I'm serious about God, and maybe you should be too."
"Ok seriously! What's gotten into you? Did that Clare chick really change everything I know and love about you?" Bianca says angrily.
"I'm still the same best friend you grew up with. I just happen to believe in a Higher Power now. Maybe if you believed in Him you'd be a little happier." He tells her, and she can't deny the fact that it might be true. That it might be something that would change her mind about things completely, but instead she just scoffs again.
"You know what Mr. Christian boy, I'm sorry I called." She says, about to hang up the phone.
"WAIT!" He blurts out, and she sighs, "What is it?"
"Why did you call me anyway? Isn't Drew your latest boy toy?" He teases, and something like this would usually have Bianca laughing, but all it does is just makes her sad. Regardless of how it seems to everyone else, she truly cares for Drew. Even though they aren't together, she still misses him. She feels like a different person when she's around him, and she wants more than anything to get him back, but she knows that there's a big problem with that, the baby.
"Hello? Bianca, you still there?" He asks, snapping Bianca back into reality.
"Drew...Drew and I, we broke up." Bianca says, sadness dripping in her voice.
"I hated that guy anyways." Fitz admits.
"You don't even know him." Bianca tells him, defending her ex boyfriend.
"From what you've told me, he never stood up for you. Seems like he was just using you for sex, or maybe because he knew he couldn't be with that Indian girl anymore." Fitz says, and for some reason this angers her.
"He could have had her if he wanted. He chose me over her!" She says, and he yawns, "Sure he did Bee."
"Whatever Mark." She replies, "Plus, you used me for sex when I was fourteen."
"Don't call me Mark...Mark is the son of two abusive parents, Fitz is the one who avoids all that. And you're wrong Bee, I did love you...at the time. But you were too busy doing drugs with Anson to notice." Fitz says, and Bianca feels her heart race when she hears his name.
It leads her back to when she killed him. And then all of the sudden she sees his face. She sees Vince, Ansons' little buddy that he had made when Bianca moved on with her life. Anger pulses through her veins as she shouts over the phone, "Don't ever say that name again!" She cries, hanging up and throwing her phone down on the bed as she cries all over again.
