a/n; This chapter contains some Deaness. If you're only here for the Sam, I come to tell you this is a passing thing. There's going to be plenty of Sam but this right here is important to the story.
"Hey Sib, can I ask you something?" Sam tossed his head back over the pillow to look at her as the credits rolled. Her stomach hit the ground. She was hoping that he would just take her not speaking much about the hunt as a sign that chapter in her life was over and she wanted to move on, never looking back again.
"Sure." She spoke despite herself; who knew, that might not even be what he was wondering about.
"I'm wondering.." Of course he was on to her. He was Sam. It was his job by all rights to be on top of things like that.. "Why you haven't cared to ask what we found out."
Sib bit the inside of her cheek, closing her eyes tightly. The sound of the television clicking off was like a bullet in the chest. "I just.."
"You can tell me anything, Sib."
"I.. Know." Sib spoke through gritted teeth, peeling her eyes open at the shift in placement. Sam had somehow made his way over already and found a way into her direct sight. He rested his hand on her leg and scooted in as far as he could, pulling his other arm around her. That's when she realized she was crying a little. Not sobbing, not even sniffling. Just tears rolling down her cheeks that only he seemed to take notice of. She hadn't even known how long they had been there. She felt like an idiot.
"You know I'm the last person that's gonna look down on you, Sib. I get you're nervous."
"I just.." She started off again, blinking back the tears and swallowing hard. "I don't wanna know."
"You aren't even interested in knowing about your life before?" Sam spoke again, this time even more curiousity in his voice.
Sib shook her head, dusting the tears off her face with the flannel he'd placed around her during the movie. "Look.." She started off quietly, barely looking at him. She wanted to keep her eyes down because she was ashamed. "Just give me some time here. Look, I don't know- I just want to think this through first."
"I'm not gonna force this on you, Sib. I just think you deserve to know, that you need to know. I'll let it go, alright?" He pushed her hair from her face and fluffed it playfully, giving her a small smile.
"Thanks Sam." She leaned against him with a sigh, closing her eyes with caution. She wasn't used to relaxing. This would be the first night she wouldn't have to worry about being chased and Sib felt.. stiff.
"Back to normal you think?" He yawned, snapping her from her thoughts and pulling her in to rest on his chest. Sib nearly laughed.
"It's never been normal. If you consider this," Sib motioned to them, "normal, then sure. But otherwise.." She drifted, covering her own yawn with her sleeve.
"Don't think we've had downtime like this in a while. Feels funny." Before she could agree with him his grip tightened slightly on her. "And uh, if it's any consolation.. I didn't read past your name."
Sib's eyes flew open and her whole body tensed momentarily, a cold feeling shooting through her veins. "Name?"
"Yeah, your name. It was the first thing we found." He mumbled, lazily running circles on her back. A small 'oh' left her mouth and she bit down on her lip. Name. Why would she need a name from the people who didn't even raise her, people she didn't even know. She had a name already. Still, though, even with her wicked reasoning curiousity hit her. Sib brushed it off as best she could.
She laid there but she felt uneasy. She couldn't get comfortable, couldn't stay still. Maybe it was because Dean was still out. Sib sighed, resting her hand over Sam's heart as per usual. It had grown to be a habit now whenever they'd fallen asleep watching movies. She just had to know everyone was safe. Most of the time it was just the two of them but when Dean would sit with them she'd kick up a foot into his lap and toss her arm around Sam. And Dean.. Dean and his damn poker nights. She could hardly count the times they'd passed out drunk and face down in a deck of cards, beer still in hand. Some nights, somehow, Dean would move her over to the couch and he'd sit in the chair beside her vigilant. She didn't understand how he could still be so normal and caring toward her even after everything that happened.
Sib tried to shake off those thoughts, too. She'd never get any sleep if she just stayed there thinking. Try as she may, though, not even Sam's steady beathing would lull her off. Her mind was in unrest, "Hey Sammy," Sib nudged his arm with hers finally, giving up the act.
"Hmm?" He murmured quietly, sleep laced heavily in his voice.
"You remember my 16th?"
"Yeah, yeah I do. Why?" She could hear the smile in his voice and watched as he lifted his arm to rub the tired from his eyes.
"You guys gave me my name then.. and to be honest it means a helluva a lot more to me than whatever you found today."
"And no matter what you're always going to be Sib. Still, though, your real family- aren't you even a little bit curious?"
"Sure. But it's a fleeting curiousity. I don't want to destroy what I've build by remembering any of my past. It's in the past for a reason. I wanna keep moving forward."
"It could give you closure." Sam reminded, choosing his words carefully.
"Sam.." She sat up, placing her hand on his face to turn his gaze to her. "Stop worrying about me. I have closure."
"Hey Sibby, guess-" The door flew open and on came the lights, Dean's voice drifting painfully. Sib squeezed her eyes shut and let her hand fall, turning her attention to the doorway. Her heart broke when she saw the look on his face; his jaw was tense and his brows furrowed, lips parted just enough to state the shock. "I'll come back later."
"It's not-"
As soon as she caught his gaze he turned to stone- straightening himself and giving her a cold look. He raised his hand to stop her. "Nah, I get it. Go 'head and celebrate. I'mma go catch happy hour."
"Dean.." If Sib thought the look she got was deadly, Sam must've gotten the look of fucking hell when he spoke up.
"I'm fine, Sammy." Dean said real tense, glaring at him. "Just watch over things. Don't let me come home to an empty house and make sure Sib stays safe."
"We'll be okay, Dean. Just gonna catch up on some sleep." Sam spoke painfully slow and hoped his brother knew better. He had this honest look on his face that shouted nothing was up, brows raised and eyes wide.
"Yeah, sure." Dean dropped his hand to the doorknob, looking over at Sib one last time. He looked so damn hurt and it was killing her. "Just remember the only thing that brings her outta the nightmares is if you sit her up and hold her real tight."
Sib's mouth fell along with her heart and the door shut before she could regain her composure.
"Go." Sam nudged her when he spoke. She turned her head back to him as if searching for approval. She didn't like the look on his face, couldn't decode it. "I'll be fine, just go."
Before she could even question it she was up and running out the door and through the hallway. Sib caught Dean's jacket right before he could make it to the door. He turned like a bolt of lightening- grabbing Sib's wrist and nearly slamming her to the wall before realizing it was her. Luckily he'd stopped himself before her back could hit the thick wood. "Don't sneak up on me like that. I coulda hurt you."
"I don't care." She snapped, pulling her wrist free and tossing her arms around him because it was the only thing she knew to do. He hugged her back hesitantly, resting his hands on her lower back and pressing his chin to the top of her head. "That looked way worse than it was. I didn't want you leaving upset."
He pulled away instantly, holding her at arm's length before dropping his hand. "Look Sib, you don't have to explain anything to me. I get it, you wanna move on, and truthfully if you do there's nobody I'd rather have you with than Sammy. At least I know he's capable of keepin' you safe."
"Dean.. Please just hear me out. It's not even like that."
"And you're not obligated to tell me if there is something between you two."
"But there isn't." Sib spoke again, metting his eyes with a serious look.
The corner of his mouth twitched slightly and he pocketed his hands. He examined her for a minute before putting his wall back up. "Look, I gotta get going."
Sib's heart began to pound when he looked to the door. Her body was jittering like she had too much caffiene. Before he could move Sib did the one thing she knew would stop him. She kissed him.
