It didn't take long for Noire to figure out what her new situation was going to be like. Her last one hadn't been particularly unpleasant, but she hadn't exactly been easy to handle for the evangelist or missionary or whatever the guy had been (Noire was too young to keep the different words those Lowee people used for themselves straight, especially when she didn't particularly care what they called themselves anyway) that had been keeping that shelter going, and the man had apparently decided Noire was better off being dumped at an abandoned temple and being told to wait there like she was a dog. Maybe, as far as the world was concerned, that was all she was. The situation before that had been definitely unpleasant, though, so she was hopeful that this one would be more like the more recent of the two... Given how often she changed from place to place, she supposed it didn't matter all that much.

The "orphanage" that she found herself being herded around now was definitely not one of the nicest places she had ever been to in her short life. It was dirty looking. though to be fair Noire had never seen too many things that weren't at least a little dirty. This place was exceptionally so, however, and thus it still stood out to her how unclean it was, even with how little she had ever experienced "clean" places and things. Most of the rooms were falling apart, the furniture looked like it had seen better days, and the grown ups looked like they'd rather be at home playing a game than near any of the kids that they were supposed to be taking care of. Of course, Noire was used to seeing that sort of thing, so that much didn't phase her as much as it was simply something to make note of — it was something she could use to her advantage if need be.

The one plus, though, and the one thing that Noire found that did impress her, was that it was the biggest place she had ever seen in her life.

As relatively jaded as the girl was, she couldn't help but be drawn in by how big the building was. Never in her entire life had she seen such a building. It had actual hallways, a row of rooms just for the kids (Noire had never slept in a room with less than four other girls or boys before), and rooms for doing things Noire had never even heard of before. It even had a second floor! While most of the rooms still looked like they could fall apart at any moment, and while the person guiding her around had made it clear that most of it was off limits to the kids, especially the kids her age, this difference in size gave Noire a look at something that she had never known before.

The world was bigger than broken down buildings and sleazy adults and getting beaten up and an empty stomach.

For something like this to exist, there was more out there — there had to be — and Noire wanted in.

At long last, her "tour" of the facility finally finished. Once again, Noire found herself and the rest of the children in her group standing outside in what she supposed was meant to be the playground for the children, but it wasn't all that much. Noire didn't particularly care about playing anyway, at least not for her own sake. Playing meant working up an appetite and working down her energy — a combination that Noire had learned the hard way went terribly together. If she observed which children were the most comfortable, the ones that were "playing" the most, then those were probably her tickets to extra bites of food and favors when she needed them. Those were the ones that Noire would "play" with.

"M-Miss... I'm hungry... May I eat early?"

Noire perked up at the sound. One of her fellow newcomers, an especially scraggy looking child, had spoken up about the thing that had been on her mind from the moment she had arrived — the thing that was, really, always on her mind. It was likely on the mind of every child in their little group.

Food.

The girl who had spoken up was the picture of pathetic. Her clothes were even more raggedy than Noire's were and she had been trailing behind the group the entire time due to a noticeable limp. No one had said anything. It must have been too much for her stomach, for her tiny, hurting body, to handle.

How the adults reacted to this would leave an impact. Most of the children, particularly the ones who had been bouncing around for a long time like Noire, understood this. It would tell them how far they could go, how much they could do, what they could and couldn't get away with. This simple moment was going to set the foundations for all of them — the smart ones, anyway. Obviously the girl who asked wasn't very experienced, or she would have known to never ask something like that, no matter how hungry she was, but Noire couldn't feel pity — she had learned her lesson, and it was a lesson she still remembered well. Now it was the girl's turn.

All eyes were trained on the girl and the adult she had asked. The adult peered down at the girl, who flinched just from the harsh look she had received from the woman. She had looked like she was ready to cry before she had asked, probably from whatever pain had been forcing her to limp for so long, now she looked like she would start the water works any second now.

"You deaf, kid? I told you when dinner was. You got here too late for lunch, so you hafta wait."

The other children lowered their heads. They were disappointed. If the woman had offered the girl food, it meant that the woman was the type who gave in to that sort of thing — the type that they could maybe get second helpings out of. Noire simply shook her head. She hadn't expected much better. It was better than she had gotten when she had tried something similar. She didn't know what this girl's situation was, but Noire hadn't eaten since the day before she had gotten dumped into that temple and she wasn't complaining. Surely the girl could handle a little more...

"B-But... I don't think I can... Please... I'm so hungry... P-Please..."

Noire had to fight back a gasp — for doing something like that would undoubtedly draw attention from the adult or the other children towards her. Didn't this girl understand her situation? How could she have done something so foolish? Worse, now she was crying! Everyone would know she was weak, that she was easy prey for other children! Of course, Noire was among those children, admittedly, but...

"Y'don't think you can...? Well, if that's so, it can't be helped, huh?" The woman sounded like she was giving in. The more innocent children of the group exchanged hopeful looks, relieved looks. It sounded like she was going to give the girl food! Maybe if they asked too, then they would be able to get food too...! Dinner was so far away, after all...!

Noire was not among the children exchanging hopeful, excited looks. Desperate looks. Noire had seen this before... No, that wasn't it. Noire had made that mistake before. It was a mistake she had sworn to never make again. There was always a chance that it would work out differently for the girl, especially given how obvious it was that there was something wrong with her, but if Noire knew adults at all, then...

There it was. That expression. It was the same no matter how many times Noire saw it. The woman's face... It wasn't the face of someone who was about to give a child food.

It was the face of someone who was getting ready to squash an insect.

Before she realized it, Noire was moving. She didn't know why. She knew every reason why she shouldn't, though. She knew she shouldn't, but here she was, doing it all the same. As the woman lifted her leg, about to make the impact on the children that none of them had expected, Noire found herself tackling the injured, hungry, crying little girl to the ground, shielding her with the only thing she had: her own body. All in a swift movement, Noire had gone from the nonchalant observer to the sacrificial lamb.

She screamed when the boot made impact with her side. The woman hadn't been holding back, or if she had been, she had still meant to use a lot of force.

"You got a little friend? Huh? You think you can have a little rebellion here? Fine! Then both! Of you! Don't! Get! Food! For! Three! Days!"

With each of the woman's exclamations, Noire found the boot crashing into her again and again. She knew better than to ask the other children for help — this was her own fault, after all. She should have stayed out of it. She knew what had been about to happen. If only she had stayed out of it, then maybe...

After that, Noire didn't know. The world faded away, sucked up by pain and the weakness she had already been feeling from the lack of food.

At least here, in the darkness, Noire could be at peace for a little while.


Noire didn't need to open her eyes to know she hadn't been brought to a room. That would have been expecting too much anyway. She felt dirt beneath her. Such a familiar feeling... Blinking back tears, she opened her eyes. Sure enough, she was propped against the side of the building. She could feel that her side had been bandaged... She didn't want to know how it looked underneath. Someone had probably given her a healing item — even more reason for the adults to be angry with her, making them waste such a thing. Despite that, the pain she felt was terrible, but worse was the knowledge that with it came days without a chance to put something in her belly. She had given herself a bad reputation with the adults now... They knew what to expect should she want to make trouble, should she want to make them get rid of her... It would be that much harder to leave, to make them send her away, and start over somewhere else.

She would have cried herself if she didn't know that that would just make it worse. The adults would think they had won, the other kids would see her as weak and easy to manipulate... She was becoming exactly the kind of person that the others would target. A person who sacrificed for others, a crybaby that couldn't hold it together... She almost wished she was back in that lonely temple, lying on the cold floor and listening to monsters go by, praying they wouldn't barge in and eat her. At least monsters weren't as scary as adults.

She had messed up. She had messed up really bad.

The black haired girl clenched her fists, forcing herself to her feet. She wanted to scream. Everything had been ruined. All because she hadn't been able to control herself. She had done something for some kid she didn't know who had deserved the beating in the first place, and now everything about her ached and felt terrible. She felt like it would almost be worth it to curl up into a ball and cry after all, just to be able to do it. It had been so long since she'd let herself have that relief that another lost meal on top of the three she had already given up that it almost felt like it would be worth it...

But nothing was worth even more food lost. She couldn't do that to herself. She knew she would regret it. The pain hurt now, the feelings were hurt now, but that would go away. It always did, eventually. Her tummy wouldn't get any fuller because of it though.

At that moment, as if fate itself was descending on her, she realized that the girl who was at the root of all of this was approaching her. For a moment, Noire felt hopeful. Surely, the girl would be appreciative to her. If that was the case... Maybe she could get something out of her. Maybe there was hope yet for her miserable stay at this miserable castle.

How positively naive she was.

"You ruined everything!" To Noire's surprise, the girl she had taken the blunt of the adult's attack for looked angry — angry with her no less. It was an anger that Noire had seen on "playgrounds" time and time again, but to see it from this girl of all people? After what Noire had done for her? It didn't make sense. Comparing the girl she was seeing now to the girl that she had jumped in the way of the adult's attack to protect, it was like night and day. The girl finally made her way over to Noire, her eyes narrowed, and before Noire could protest, she was being grabbed at the collar and shaken. "If I had gotten beaten up, all the other kids would feel bad for me. Now they think you're some 'hero' and aren't even thinking about me! You... You ruined everything!"

Noire's eyes widened. The girl wasn't even limping anymore. It... It had looked so real, though...

Both of them were still lacking experience, it seemed. Noire for believing such a performance, the girl for thinking any hungry child in their right mind would care about a hero. If anything, a "hero" was the kind of child that most children in their situation would probably ignore, or worse, they would think that the "hero" was someone they could get something from rather than one they would give something to.

The exact kind of person Noire didn't want to be.

"I hate you!" At least the girl wasn't going to do more to Noire than had already been done to her. Not that she really could. Dropping Noire, the girl simply gave the black haired girl a hateful look — Noire realized that tears were streaming down the girl's face — and she stormed off. Looking around, Noire realized that they were the only ones outside right now, which meant she was probably off to wherever the rest of the kids were... or maybe to her room? As Noire clutched her aching side, she realized that, judging by the way the sky looked, it was probably around dinner time right now.

Right now, the other kids were eating.

Right now, if she hadn't done what she had, she would have been eating.

Noire's lips quivered.

"If... If no one's around, then..."

She didn't manage to get out more than that. Sinking to her knees, the girl hugged her legs as her face contorted, as if she was still trying to fight against what she had already decided she would allow. It was slow, at first, but, with every tear that fell, another pair came after. She collapsed, overwhelmed, as she began to sob — letting out tears that she had had bottled up for longer than she could remember. She cried for the family, if she had even ever had one, that she could no longer remember, the family that had surely been the first people to want to get rid of her. She cried for all of the hungry days and nights she had gone through. She cried for not being so lucky as to have been born in Lowee. She cried for the fact that she wasn't going to get dinner tonight.

Noire dug her fists into the dirt as she cried, feeling ashamed of herself. She had thought she was better than this... She had thought she had grown up and become a big girl... She had thought...

It was like this, in this horrible condition, that she was found. It was like this, in the worst state possible, that she felt a feather-light touch grace her back.

Alarmed, Noire spun around. A bad move, given her injuries, but being seen like this was even worse a fate than any physical pain such an action might cause her.

What she found surprised her. Another girl, probably the same age as Noire, had bent down to touch her. She looked concerned. Genuine concern was something Noire wasn't used to, and it alarmed her all the more. After what had just happened with the other girl, she had even less reason to trust this girl than she might normally — which is to say, she had negative reason to trust this new girl. This "concern" that she saw... There was definitely something behind it. There was a motive. After all, the only concern Noire had ever shown anyone had come with a motive.

The girl seemed to understand this. She leaned backwards and fell onto her behind, letting out a brief "oof" as her rear end made contact with the dirt. Her clothes were baggy, almost like they could fall off of her at any moment, and there was something about her that seemed to put Noire off. Now the two of them, sitting on the ground, were at least on an even playing field, but after what she had seen Noire doing... Surely there was no way she wouldn't think Noire was an easy target.

Thinking quickly, Noire brought her hand to her face and began furiously wiping her eyes with the back of her arm. This had the unfortunate effect of smearing dirt all over her face, which just made what she had been doing all the more obvious. The girl sitting with her seemed to find this amusing, for she laughed at her. Seeing the smears on her arm, Noire could only imagine how pathetic she looked. She was painting even more targets on herself, wasn't she?

"Here..." Noire stared. The girl had reached into her clothes and pulled out a small cloth, and now she was offering it to her. Noire knew better, of course. Taking this would just put her in the girl's debt. It would mean a meal she owed the girl, maybe even more. She had done the same to other children, even those younger than her. She already probably owed the girl a few bites of what meals she would get from now on just to keep her silent about the humiliating state she had found Noire in. Knowing this, Noire simply turned her head, as if refusing the offer with her face. "Huh...? But you're all dirty..."

"I-I don't need your help." Noire knew that the damage had been done, but she couldn't risk it getting any worse. She couldn't- "H-Hey, stop! G-Get offa me!"

Apparently the other girl didn't care about what Noire could or couldn't risk. She had gotten on her hands and knees and closed the distance between the two of them and was now scrubbing away at Noire's face, like she was a little baby or something. Her motions were both gentle and firm, as if she was trying not to hurt Noire but was letting her know how easy it would be for her to do it.

"Sooorryyyy... Not gonna do it..." The girl replied in a sing-song voice. It made Noire angry. Was the girl making fun of her? Was the girl feeling happy knowing how she had just stumbled upon a new gopher? Was that why she could talk like that?

"Why are you doing this...?!" Noire couldn't take it anymore. She would have shoved the girl away if she hadn't pulled away at that moment herself, stuffing the dirty cloth back into her clothes. Noire felt even more frustration as the girl looked her over, a strange smile on her face as she looked Noire up and down. "What's so funny...?!"

The girl tilted her head.

"Nothing..." The girl giggled as she looked at Noire's strained expression, before gently raising a hand to her chin, as if she was considering something. "Weeeell... It's funny that you think something's funny... I think...?"

Noire was sure she was being made fun of now. After how terrible this day had been, this weird girl had to make fun of her on top of it? Noire opened her mouth, prepared to give this girl a talking to, prepared to pull out all the stops to make sure that this girl didn't make her time here any worse than it was already inevitably going to be-

"Oh yeah, here. I forgot... I got this for you... Don't let anybody see it, 'kay? Bye bye..."

Noire blinked as the girl toddled off into the building, waving more cheerfully than Noire found comfortable just before she entered.

She raised a hand to her mouth... or rather, to the large piece of bread that had just been stuffed into it.

What... What had just happened?

Noire shook her head, raising her other hand to the piece of bread so she could clutch it as she ripped off a bite she could actually chew, savoring it far more than she had anticipated she would. As she swallowed her first bite, she let out a shaking sigh of relief. Even this was more than she thought she could have hoped for after what had happened earlier.

She could worry about what had just happened later.

Right now, she just wanted to savor this brief moment of goodness while it lasted.

She had a feeling it wasn't going to last for long.

They never did.