Warnings: Enter characters you won't know if you haven't seen the previously mentioned Episodes of Consequence. These aren't really warnings anymore, are they? They stopped being warnings after the word "prostitution". Anyway, I feel I should mention here that zero to none of my knowledge on this subject is any kind of first hand, or even second hand really. Any and all prostitution related knowledge portrayed in this story comes from either outside sources (i.e., TV and internet) or common sense (really, it's not that hard to know to use a condom). So really, I may not know what the hell I'm talking about at times. I'm thinking the most shaky areas will be the money stuff. I really don't know how to figure out prices and such accurately without going out and finding a prostitute, and I am just not up for that. Someone else wants to fill me in on that, be my guest. As interesting and helpful as everything on prostitution. procon. org was (extremely, go check it out), it doesn't really have anything on the money.

Review Replies:

Deadly Sharpies: I would've replied the day I got your review, but the link was being stupid, so I think I'm just going to reply to all reviews here. Anyway, teehee! Thanks! :D Glad to have answered your wish for a non-naive Butters.

All that aside, enjoy Chapter 2.


Not So Naïve Anymore

Chapter 2

I sat there gaping at him for a moment, smile spreading and excitement growing, "Really?"

"Yes, really," he reaffirmed.

I jumped up and ran over to him, giving him the biggest hug and a kiss on the cheek. "Ohmygosh! Thank you thank you thank you, soooo much! Thank you for giving me this opportunity! I promise I will make it worth your while! Thank yooooou!" I squealed.

Kenny laughed cheerfully, hugging me back and returning the kiss to my cheek. "Of course. You're welcome. From now on, it's anything for you," he told me, voice full of sincerity.

I finally pulled back to let him breathe, and giggled a little when I looked at him. "Oh my god, that's right," I murmured offhandedly, and took a deep breath in to calm myself.

"So, uh, I guess I should make a call, huh?"

"You mean to your old…?" I trailed off, giggling again. Just the idea that I was now a legitimate pimp was still sinking in, energy buzzing through me.

He nodded.

"Yeah. Do that," I said, waving him off to do what he needed to do. "Imma go over somethin' in my head," I added, wiggling my now jittery fingers at my head.

"Right," he said, pulling out his cell to make the call that would make this all official.

While he talked to his soon-to-be-former pimp, I ran over the more immediate plan briefly. When he hung up, I asked the time, feeling silly when he just looked over at the clock on his nightstand.

"Quarter to five."

"Right. Umm…" I confirmed, still formulating the evening's plans. "TGIF, huh? So, how'd he take it?"

"Heh, yeah. He was disappointed, sure, but like I said, he'll deal. You don't have to worry about him coming after me or anything."

"Good, that's good. Alright. You don't have to work tonight. We've got other forms of work to deal with. Grab a notebook, you're coming with me," I informed him, gesturing for him to follow me out to the car, somehow already easily slipping into the roll.

Hastily grabbing said notebook and a pen, he traipsed down the hall after me, "Where we goin'?"

"To pick up a few more girls," I tossed over my shoulder. "But we'll need to make a few calls first; I don't know where any of the girls I have in mind live, and I don't know offhand if I have all their numbers. You might, though."

"Ah. Explains the notebook," he mumbled. "Um, hey, do your parents know you're here?"

"Heh! No. Why the hell would I do that?" I scoffed and climbed into the car, continuing once Kenny had climbed in next to me, "I ran out of the house without a word. I think they tried to ground me on my way out the door. Wouldn't have told 'em where I was going even if they had managed to stop me. No, all they know is that I took Mom's car."

"Right, duh. I guess all those years of getting grounded for nothing have finally caught up with you, huh?"

"You could say that. Alright, ya got that notebook? 'Course ya do. Make a list, leaving room for phone numbers and addresses for each." He nodded and opened up the notebook. "'Kay. Sally, Lexus, Mercedes, Porsche," I listed, waiting to let him catch up. "Got 'em?"

"Sally, Lexus, Mercedes, Porsche," he recited back to me. "Got 'em."

"Alright," I said, pulling out my phone and ignoring the twelve missed calls. There was a reason I left the damn thing on silent. "Now, I think I might still have Lexus and Sally in here, but just in case, I want you to check your phone for any of these girls, too. If you find 'em, write it down."

"Gotcha," he said, pulling out his own phone as well. Kenny's got a lot of numbers; it wouldn't surprise me if he found any or all of them.

I found Lexus as he scribbled the first number, and informed Kenny of this as I hit the 'talk' button and waited for the ring.

A bubbly, almost Valley Girl voice picked up, "Hi, sweetie! Who is this?"

"Hi, Lexus? I don't know if you remember me, it's Butters. I'm in your class, and we sort of dated a little, back in elementary school?"

"Oh yeeeah, I think I remember you. You came to Raisins a lot. Little blond kid, right? Hey there, sweetie! How are you?"

I winced, ignoring the fake cheer in her voice and the fact that she kept calling me 'sweetie', even though I knew I meant nothing to her after she broke my heart, "Yeah, that's me. Hey, listen, I need to talk to you. Is it okay if I come over?"

"I dunno… well, I suppose there's no harm in it. Sure, I guess so. What was it you wanted to talk to me about?"

"Great! I'll tell you when I get there. Also, I don't know where you live. Could I get your address?" She told me as I got Kenny's attention and repeated it to him so he could write it down, "Great, thanks. I'll be right over," and hung up. I started the car, speaking now to Kenny, who had, in fact, found all four numbers in that time, "Alright, that's a start. Let's head over."

It didn't take long; South Park's fairly small, and we knew our way around. Jumping out of the car with Kenny on my tail, we headed up the front steps. The door flung open and I was pulled into a hug, "Butters! I'm so glad you called me! Come in, come in!"

I exchanged a look with Kenny, then shrugged and gestured for him to follow. Once inside, I tried to speak up, "Um, this is—"

"Ohmygod Kenny! I didn't know you were coming, too!" she exclaimed, jumping him as well.

He laughed, turning on his infamously charming smile, "Yup, here I am. Hi, Lexus." He turned to me with a knowing smile, nodding, "I think this is gonna work out juuust fine."

I returned the smile and nod, and turned back to the overly happy redhead, "So, Lexus, we came over to talk to you…?" I reminded, hinting that we should maybe go sit down so we could, you know, talk.

"Oh! Right! Come, come. Sit, sweetie," she said leading us to the living room and falling into an armchair.

Sitting on the couch with Kenny, I asked, "So, um, are your parents home?"

"No, not yet. They won't be home for an hour or so."

I nodded, "Now then, I know this is gonna sound odd, and probably very unexpected, coming from me—"

"That's the understatement of the year," Kenny interjected.

"Yes, thank you for that, Kenny. Moving on. So, I suppose I should just – should I just say it? – I'll just say it," I briefly questioned Kenny before answering myself. By now, we had Lexus thoroughly confused. "I want you to work for me," I phrased delicately.

"Huh? Work for you? What do you mean? What kind of work?"

"Do you have a job right now, Lexus?"

"Yeah, I upgraded to Hooters. Why?"

"Oh, that's just perfect," Kenny threw in, chuckling.

I chuckled with him, nodding, "Okay, that's fine. Keep working there. I'll be sure not to interfere with your hours," I told her, unable to stop giggling with Kenny.

She just stared at us, confused and wondering what was so funny.

Finally, I calmed myself enough to continue, "Well, now that I know where you work, I don't have to worry so much about insulting you with this question. How do I put this? I recently became a pimp, and I was wondering if you would care to join us and work for me."

And now the confusion was shock. "W-what?"

"He's dead serious. Believe me, I went through the same thing less than an hour ago," Kenny assured her. "So, you wanna be a hooker?" he asked less delicately.

"I-I don't know what to say…" she stammered.

"Well, it's not a far cry from Hooters. And you're hot. Working there, you were bound to get picked up sooner or later. Better by Butters than some creep, right?" he offered.

"W-what would I have to do?"

I answered this time, "Um, sleep with people for money? You know, prostitution? You don't have to do it if you're uncomfortable with it, but I think you have potential here."

"Oh…! Really?" she asked, blushing.

"Definitely," Kenny agreed. "Don't worry, you'll do fine. Butters here knows what he's doing."

"Mhmm," I nodded.

"Wow. Um, thanks. But I really don't know; this is quite a decision to make so suddenly."

"I know; take your time. And feel free to ask if you have any questions."

"I'll save you some time, though, by telling you to just trust me when I say that, even though he may not look it, I think Butters is going to make an excellent pimp," Kenny added some flattering final thoughts. I blushed, but didn't say any more.

She didn't actually think about it for long, considering Kenny's persuasive words for maybe half a minute before blurting excitedly, "I'll do it! Yes!"

"Are you sure?" I asked, not wanting her to choose a path she didn't really want to choose.

"Yes! To be honest, it's something I've considered before. And Kenny's right; better you, Butters, than some creep I don't know or trust. I trust you, Butters. So I'll place my life in your hands," she explained.

"Thanks, Lexus! That means a lot to me! I won't let you down," I thanked her with a grateful smile.

"I believe it."

"Awesome. I will need to discuss business matters with you, but we'll do that a bit later. Do you still keep in touch with Mercedes and Porsche? And do you work tonight?" I moved on with the subject.

"Yeah, they work with me at Hooters. We all go in at eight tonight."

"Mm, perfect. Can you do me a favor and call them and ask if they would be interested in joining us as well? Then I'd like you to meet us at Shakey's in about an hour at six. Bring them with you if they say yes," I instructed.

"Sure, I can do that," she agreed.

"Great," I said, standing and motioning for Kenny to do the same. "We'll see you in an hour, then."

Lexus walked us to the door, giving us goodbye hugs.

Back in the car, Kenny spoke, "That went well. Good call there, having her get Porsche and Mercedes for you. I take it Sally's next for us?"

"Yup," I said, pulling out my cell again. "Hmm, doesn't look like I have hers."

Kenny handed me the notebook and I added her number, along with the other two I was missing, and made the call.

"Hello?"

"Hi, is this Sally?"

"Yes, who is this?"

"It's Butters. I know it's been a while, but I wanted to talk to you."

"Bu… Butters…? Oh, wow. It has been a while. I don't think I've talked to you since that thing in elementary."

"A-heh, that's actually kinda what I wanted to talk to you about. But not over the phone. Can I come over?"

"Really? Sure, sure. Come on over. Do you need directions?"

"No, no. Just an address. We'll find it," I recited again for Kenny and hung up. Pulling out of the driveway, I murmured, "I think this'll be the easiest one; we won't have to do any explaining or convincing." Kenny laughed, and we went on our way.

A few minutes later, we pulled up, and soon enough we were sitting in Sally's room with the door shut. We had greeted her parents on the way in and then made our way upstairs. Now we sat in a circle on the floor of her room.

"So, what's up?" Sally asked.

"It has to do with the old… company. You remember…" I said, getting right into it.

"Yeah, of course I remember."

"You're likely the only one," Kenny piped in.

"Heh, well, so far, anyway. But, yeah, probably," I agreed. "Anyway, I'm restartin' the business, so I figured I'd see if you wanted in."

"Huh. Restarting? As in, you're pimping again?" Sally asked with an eyebrow raised.

"Finally!" I exclaimed, throwing my arms up and pulling her into an awkward, seated hug. "Someone who will believe it without having to question it!"

She giggled, and Kenny rolled his eyes, "Geez, soooorryy. 'S not my fault you seem so innocent all the time."

Laughing, I told him, "I know, I know. I'm just givin' ya a hard time. But to answer your question, Sally, yes. I am pimpin' again. 'Course, you know, now it'll actually be… sex, not just kisses, but I suppose you figured that much out."

"Yes, I figured. Well, I think that's great that you're getting back in the game, Butters! I know we were doing well when we gave it up. Hell, you could be great at it now. Yeah, I'll join you, and I'll help you see it all the way through."

"Awesome! You didn't have to think about that too long…" I commented.

"Well, I mean, I'm in the same place as you here; I've done this before with you, and I know it'll work."

"Damn. You know how long it took him to convince me of that?" Kenny asked rhetorically, to which Sally and I laughed.

"Well, like she said, we've done this together before. Sorry, Kenny, you'll just have to trust us on it," I shrugged.

"Oh, believe me; after that mini-lecture on running a good prostitution ring you gave me earlier, I do."

"Aw, you know you didn't mind hearin' it."

"Nah, 'course not."

We exchanged a smile, and I turned back to Sally. Checking the time, I went back to the evening's plans, "Alright, we got a little over half an hour, so I guess we'll catch you up." She nodded and I continued, "So, I'm getting back in it because of Kenny here, really. When I found out he was a prostitute, it reminded me of our thing in elementary, and from there I just took that idea and went straight to Kenny with it. And so, here we are. I've already got Lexus, one of those Raisins girls—"

"Ooh, good choice," Sally praised.

"Yes, well, I got her to join us, and now she's gettin' in touch with a few of the other girls from there, so hopefully we have three others meetin' us at Shakey's at around six. You are free tonight, yes?"

"If anything, I would have just gone to a movie or something with friends, nothing I can't blow off," she shrugged. "I figured you'd want me along tonight."

"All too right. Good. Now, before we head over there, I want to set this with the two of you," I said, speaking to both Sally and Kenny now. "Kenny, you're my number one. Without a doubt, you are the most experienced, and I also don't doubt that you are one of the best out there currently, so I want to keep you at the top. Sally, you're my number two. You've worked with me before, so I know the potential you have. Don't let those bitches push you around; let them know where you stand with me. We three have a history, and I want to keep you close."

They both nodded in response, Sally adding, "I understand," then, turning to Kenny, she said with a smile, "Looks like we'll be working closely together. I look forward to it!"

We all couldn't help but smile. We could tell this was going to work out well between us.