CHAPTER 2
Rachel checked her phone again, she had been checking her phone for new messages or missed calls every couple of minutes for the past two days. She mentally chastised herself again, and once more she repeated what had become her mantra ever since Finn ditched her. "I'm better off alone, focus Rachel, focus on what you really want!" But the mantra wasn't helping either, for the one thing that she really wanted at the moment was to see Jesse again. She closed her eyes and frowned, wanting to clear her mind but finding it impossible. Jesse St James, whom she had finally managed to almost forget, was now present in her every thought ever since that day at the coffee shop. How silly of her to think that he was almost forgotten.
"Are you alright?" asked one of her dads. She was having breakfast with her dads but had barely touched her food.
"Yeah, of course, I thought for a moment that today was Wednesday! I have that big Spanish test tomorrow." She added improvising before taking an uninterested bite of her PB & J and gulping down some juice. "You know what I could really have this morning? Some coffee…"
"Are you sure you are alright? You never have coffee in the morning." said her other dad.
She smiled sincerely at them while she helped herself to a cup of coffee. "Yes I am fine, stop worrying about me! It's just that I have final exams, Nationals and Prom coming up." And most importantly, Jesse St James is back. "But you know me, I have everything planned and under control, so there is no need to worry!"
Her parents were attending a friend's wedding in Florida, and then they would stay taking a two week vacation. They promised to be back by Nationals, and made Rachel promise she would send them pictures of prom night.
Rachel sighed in relief when they left, she would not be able to hold the "everything under control" façade for long, not now that Jesse had stormed back into her life.
She went back into her room and looked at herself in the mirror once more before applying lipstick; she had been particularly careful picking her outfits for the past two days, just in case…
"Stop!" she said to her reflection out loud, she had to stop thinking about Jesse!
"Rachel, could I…." he had said when he walked her to her car that day.
She looked at him quizzically, wondering what was it that he wanted to ask her.
"Can I call you?" he finally asked, trying his best to hide uncharacteristic nervousness but not really succeeding.
She smiled immediately. "Of course you can! Do you still have my number?"
"Yes I do" he said with a warm smile that almost melted her insides. "I will definitely call you then. Take care Rachel."
Rachel could see that he didn't know what to do next, he had been extremely gentle and careful with her that day, as if she would storm off at the smallest provocation, if he said or did something wrong. She felt flattered by the way he was acting, she had always expected UCLA Jesse to be insufferable, yet there he was, unpretentious and modest, being the same great guy she knew hid behind his cool badass exterior. Rachel extended her arms and pulled him into a quick hug, and for that brief moment she knew that she had never felt better than between his arms. She allowed herself to breathe him in before letting go, her heart beating so wildly inside her chest that she was afraid he would notice the effect he had on her.
After their encounter she was certain that he would call her. But after two days of not hearing from him, she was starting to grow hopeless. Maybe UCLA Jesse was insufferable after all.
His loss was her last thought while entering into her typical Rachel Berry Denial mode and going into school with her head held high. She was at her locker when her phone started vibrating in her pocket indicating that she had a text message, but she took her time before checking it, she would not be the needy chick, not this time around anyway. It was probably a message from her dads telling her that they were at the airport about to board their plane. But as soon as she got to her Chemstry class she checked her phone, only to find a message from Jesse.
Coffee after school? Need to talk to you.
J
Rachel stared at her phone, trying hard to keep her cool even though she felt like dancing around. She swallowed hard, composed herself, and discretely put her phone away, not able to contain a smile. He wanted to see her, after all. But since she had been waiting for two days for him to communicate with her somehow, he could certainly wait a few hours for her to reply.
After the longest Chemistry class, she checked her phone again and there was another message from Jesse.
Did you get my message? Pick you up after glee club?
J
How long do you wait before texting a girl you like?
That was the question which plagued Jesse from the moment he left Rachel at the coffee shop until he finally hit the 'send' button two days later. Usually, he waited for girls to contact him; he had little interest in the chase. This indifferent attitude had served him well- he had spent most weekends of his high school years on dates or in bed with a stream of attractive, popular girls. Once he had hit LA, his nonchalant approach to dating had sorority girls swarming around him.
However, Rachel Berry wasn't some cheerleader or Greek clique honey; she was the only girl who had managed to get under his skin and force him to break from his typical laid back behavior. He found himself checking his phone obsessively, willing her name to illuminate on his screen. However, he knew she wouldn't make the first move; not only because he had said he would contact her, but also because he knew he had a great deal to make up for. Granted their reunion had been quite amicable, and when she had briefly embraced him he felt that she wanted more, but he knew that Rachel's heart was fragile. She had warned him that should he inflict heartbreak upon her she may never recover, and he suspected that there had been an element of truth in her words.
So, when Jesse walked away from Rachel that day at the coffee shop, not towards his car but towards the music store to buy the gift for his uncle he had instantly forgotten when he heard the familiar notes of Hello, his fingers had been itching to text her. Several times that afternoon he tapped out some inane message only to delete it. Then he toyed with typing out his true feelings; he wrote lengthy messages of apology for the sins of the past and promises of a brighter future should she choose to allow him back into her heart. Those were also discarded. In the end, he gave up and tossed his phone onto his bed before joining his family for dinner.
Sunday was his uncle's birthday which meant a family trip to the movies and dinner of take-out. There was little opportunity for Jesse to even think about composing a meaningful text to Rachel. In the early evening Jesse was sent to the store for ice cream, and it was only when he was behind the wheel of his uncle's MPV that his mind floated back to Rachel Berry. He sighed deeply as he tossed words and phrases around his head; nothing seemed right. He was at the point of giving up when he pulled into a parking space at the store. Deciding which flavor ice cream to choose seemed like an impossible task as he stood before the freezer at the back of the store. Hands on hips, he sighed once again under the weight of his task.
"It's just fucking ice cream," he muttered under his breath.
A voice startled him.
"You might not be my student anymore, but I can still tell you that cursing in public isn't a great idea for a future star,"
Jesse turned his head towards the voice and felt a wide smile spread across his face as he saw Will Schuester approaching him.
"Mr Schuester," Jesse said warmly, "How are you?"
The teacher returned his grin. "Great, thank you, and you? LA treating you well?"
Jesse nodded. "Yeah, the year-round tan is hard but it's a small sacrifice I'm willing to make,"
Will chuckled. "So what brings you to Lima? Surely they have ice cream in LA,"
"Family thing," Jesse explained, "Plus, we have a few weeks off to study for finals next month,"
"Right," Will said, and hesitated before continuing, "Does Rachel know you are home?"
"Yeah, I saw her yesterday, we had coffee," Jesse informed his former coach.
Will's face registered surprise. "Oh? So you guys are ok?"
Jesse nodded. "I think so, I mean, I hope so,"
Will smiled briefly. "Me too, what happened last year was…unfortunate,"
Jesse rolled his eyes. "I was an idiot, let's be honest here, Mr Schuester, and I want to make amends, not only with Rachel but with New Directions. I kinda ruined their chances for Regionals,"
"Honestly?" the teacher enquired.
"Of course," Jesse confirmed.
Will's face lit up with a smile. "I have a proposition for you,"
By the time Jesse returned to the house with a liter of cookie dough ice cream, he had decided that Mr Schuester's presence at the store could not have been a coincidence; fate had played its hand to help him with his text problem with Rachel. He grinned as he settled into the sofa, one cousin on both sides and three spoons in the freezing tub. He knew exactly what he was going to text to Rachel the next day.
Jesse was awoken by his curtains being wrenched open by his aunt; for a moment he wondered if his life at UCLA was all a dream and he was still a senior at Carmel, late for Vocal Adrenaline practice. He rubbed his eyes in an attempt to make sense of his surroundings.
"Jesse, get your ass out of bed," his aunt said loudly, "I need you to do the school run,"
"What?" he yawned, lazily stretching his arms above his head.
"Jace left at six, and I have a breakfast meeting at eight thirty," Olivia explained, "I need you to get the girls to school,"
The relief of knowing Vocal Adrenaline was still a distant memory was almost palpable. After a brief shower, Jesse found himself packing lunches, checking book bags and bundling smiling children into the MPV. Once at the school gates, Jesse bent to kiss each of his cousins before watching them run into the yard to their friends. When he straightened up, he felt the predatory gaze of a gaggle of bored housewives pass over his form. He flashed them a flirtatious grin and got back into the car. He pulled out his phone and tapped out a message to Rachel.
Coffee after school? Need to talk to you.
J
He waited a few moments for her response, but when it became apparent that she was not going to immediately reply, he threw the car into reverse to head home to his books.
Patience might have been a virtue but it was a quality Jesse did not possess. He managed just over an hour of study before he reached for his phone to contact Rachel once more.
Did you get my message? Pick you up after glee club?
J
He knew it sounded a little needy, but in that moment he didn't care. Rachel Berry brought out all kinds of uncharacteristic behaviors and feelings in him. Placing his phone carefully on his desk so it was within eyesight and easy reach, he picked up his notes to continue reading. Even with his eyes half-on the phone, he jumped slightly when it vibrated with the arrival of a text.
Sure. Meet me in the parking lot.
R
His lips curved into a small smile while his fingers danced over the touch-screen.
I'll be there. Looking forward to seeing you.
J
When he returned to his notes, studying was suddenly a whole lot easier.
Jesse was careful to park at the back of the lot; he knew that the other members of New Directions were unlikely to welcome him with open arms, and for now he saw no reason for them to know of his presence in Lima. He watched them file out of the school building and wander over to their cars. One by one they drove out of the lot until only Rachel remained. He got out of the car and walked over to her. The significance of this location was not lost on Jesse; he felt a pang of guilt as he recalled standing before her, egg in hand, Giselle's voice echoing in his ear.
However, Rachel merely smiled. "Hey,"
"Hey," he repeated.
"Shall we go?" she moved to head over to his car, but he caught her arm.
"I'm sorry," he said simply, his eyes penetrating hers with a look which conveyed all of the words and feelings he was unable to articulate.
She touched his face gently. "I know,"
Jesse visibly relaxed. "Soy latte?"
"I might throw caution to the wind and have a shot of cinnamon,"
"Don't go too crazy, it is only Monday," Jesse grinned as he held the door open for her.
The ease at which they fell into their old banter both amazed and thrilled him. The short ride to the Lima Bean was filled with light chatter, both completely comfortable with the other. Jesse ordered their drinks while Rachel found them a booth. He placed her latte on the table and sat opposite her.
"So what did you want to talk to me about?" she enquired, sipping the hot liquid.
"I saw Mr Schue at the store last night," Jesse informed her.
"Oh? He didn't mention it," she said.
"No, I said I wanted to talk to you first," Jesse said, "He had an interesting proposal for me,"
"What?"
"I told him that I wanted to try to make it up to you guys for screwing you over at Regionals last year," Jesse began.
Rachel held up her hand. "That's the past, Jesse, and besides, we won Regionals this year and we're going to Nationals in a few weeks,"
Jesse nodded. "I know, but I still want to make things right," he paused. "So, Mr Schue asked me to help out with your set list for Nationals,"
He waited for Rachel's reaction.
He wants to make it up to ME. Rachel knew that after the way her teammates had treated Jesse, it was unlikely that he wanted to make it up to them, after all, they had retaliated Vocal Adrenaline's offense with their funk number. She had forgiven him for that awful parking lot incident, she really had, but she knew the rest of New Directions hadn't, and that they would give Jesse hell, especially after she had recently admitted that she was wrong in trusting Jesse and they were right.
Rachel smiled, and she could see that Jesse had been holding his breath. He looked more relaxed now, almost relieved at her reaction.
"Jesse, you don't really have to do this, you should know that I've forgiven you already, I wouldn't be talking to you if I hadn't. If someone knows how to hold - and maintain- a grudge, it's me!"
The look that she received from him after that last statement she could not describe.
"Rachel, you are the most incredible person that I know. There is no one like you..."
Rachel looked at him confused, but Jesse quickly changed the course of his dialogue, steering it into dangerous ground.
"Listen, Rachel, you can say that you've forgiven me for what I did to you, but I'll never forgive myself. It was spiteful..."
"Jesse, you weren't alone, so don't..."
He interrupted her.
"Rachel, it wasn't my idea in the first place, but what I did to you was unforgivable." Jesse looked down at his crossed hands on the table, his knuckles white, looking raked with guilt, his every word full of remorse. "I was blind with jealousy, I should have never..."
Rachel could not let him continue, were those tears brimming in his eyes? He was clearly affected by what he had done, and she felt it wasn't her place to let him rub salt into his own wound.
"Jesse, stop" she said while placing a hand between his. "Look at me."
When she saw that he couldn't lift his head, she tenderly touched the side of his face, and when he looked at her, she could see a single tear rolling down his cheek, which he quickly wiped before taking both her hands in his and attempting to smile.
"Jesse, I've forgiven you. I forgive you. We're okay, really."
Jesse let out a defeated laugh.
"You really are extraordinary Rachel"
She was sure she was blushing, and she was grateful when he changed the subject, even though she was sad when he let go of her hands.
"So, will you let me help with the set list? I know it will be hard convincing your friends, but it's worth a shot."
Rachel smiled. She knew that Jesse's help could be their only hope at Nationals. Beating the Warlblers and Aural Intensity had been hard, but beating Vocal Adrenaline was something else. Not only they were exceedingly talented, they were also sneaky, and New Directions could certainly use a few tricks of their own to stand up to them. Who could help them better than Jesse St James, the enemy's former lead?
"Okay, let's give it a shot then."
Jesse smiled at her. Her teammates were in for quite a surprise…
Original Groffette's Author's Note
Thank you for all of your wonderful reviews! I am so pleased that you enjoyed chapter 1! I am thrilled to be collaborating with Gemelli22 on this; she is fabulous and is the real brain power behind this story. I hope you enjoyed chapter 2! We know what's going to happen in chapter 3….I. CAN'T. WAIT!
Gemelli22
Thank you for all your reviews! We thought that a different take of all the Rachel drama would be a refreshing change! Stick around for Chapter 3, that's when the St. Berry goodness starts (and the M rating!)
