A/N: I want to thank all of you for those lovely reviews! Here is a new chapter with more lovely flirting and humorous content as well as the entrance of a distressing damsel. Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 2- Backside


Elizabeth considered delving into this quick answer, but decided she wouldn't really mind being in his lap. This was the first time they had been in close proximity in ages and she was looking forward to a warm touch…. "Agreed."

Jack raised his eyebrows in surprise. "You're actually going to accept?"

"Aye, Captain."

"You do want to know what's bothering me, then."

She nodded.

Another sigh was brought forth as Jack rested his chin in his hand. "All right…first of all, you should never have let William go. It's most likely my fault for being so treacherously forward with you in front of him on occasion. Most likely my fault he left. You loved him. I had no right to make moves upon his woman.

"Oh Jack…you know I don't blame you." She said, placing her hand upon his arm, but he didn't seem to feel it. "Will and I would never have worked. You know, fate intervening and all that."

Jack nodded slightly, but she knew he still blamed himself. However, she chose to be quiet on the issue. "That's not all of it, though." He took a swig of rum. "Ever since I…came back…I've been having nightmares…I can barely sleep for them."

Elizabeth also took a swig of rum. "Nightmares?"

"Aye. S'different every night. Sometimes I'm murdered by Barbossa, Will, numerous others…sometimes I'll have finally gotten you into bed and you'd stab me in the back or die in me arms…" He trailed off, thrusting his fist against his mouth as he remembered each and every one of those horrid dreams and not realizing he'd admitted that he wanted her as more than a confidant and crewmate.

Elizabeth's realization made her heart soar, but still she frowned and rubbed his arm thoughtfully. "Will and I…wouldn't have been happy together…Calypso knows I loved him, but I do not regret his leaving. It was destiny." He met her eyes and almost smiled, but then looked away. "And as for those bad dreams, well…we have about an hour until needing to be at The Faithful Bride. Would you be able to get some rest if I lay beside you?"

This time he glanced at her sharply, but when he saw the soft look on her face he sighed. "Certainly worth a try, luv."

"I thought you'd say that." She murmured, mildly amused.

A small chuckle escaped his mouth as he took off his shirt. When Elizabeth gave him a questioning look, he shrugged and headed straight for the bed that actually looked inviting to him for the first time since his return to the land of the living. "Couldn't ever sleep with that on."

Elizabeth felt him watching her from his berth as she quickly divested herself of effects before lying next to him, but his fatigue soon overcame him. He was snoring lightly a few minutes later. A strong urge to touch him, to hold him close, nearly undid her, but she forced herself to ignore it. This would only keep him awake and he desperately needed his rest. She smiled as she slowly drifted to sleep as well breathing in his scent and allowing her muscles to relax for the first time in a long time.

She stood on a beach staring off into the horizon and then turned to breathe in the smells around her, sunlight glaring off of the azure waters. "This place looks familiar." Traveling inland she found the shade to be extremely cool and refreshing compared to the heat of the bright sun. A warm breeze, palm trees and soft sand against her bare feet felt like heaven.

CRUNCH. Something snapped behind her.

Turning swiftly, she reached for a sword that wasn't there and looked down in astonishment to find she was wearing the undergarments she had worn last time on this island. For she had no doubt on which island she currently inhabited.

CRUNCH.

"Who's there?"

"It's me, Lizzie. Who else would it be? We're stranded here remember?" Jack questioned, stepping into her line of vision.

She stared at him blankly. His coat and effects were once again gone, sweat shining at his collarbone and something inviting sparkling in his eyes. "Oh."

"Rum?" His breath smelled of the very thing he was offering.

"Yes." She murmured, taking it and beginning to chug.

"Don't drink all of the bloody rum! Lizzie, that's enough. Lizzie. Lizzie! ELIZABETH! We have to get up, darling. Wake up!"

Startled from her vivid dream, Elizabeth sat straight up to find herself almost nose to nose with the very person she'd been dreaming of who had been leaning over trying to wake her. Their lips were so close. If we were to say something our lips would

"Nightmare?" He breathed. TouchOh God…wait slow down Lizzie dear, now what did he ask?

"Decidedly not." She muttered, getting out of the bed before it became awkward or he reacted to the tension…or worse yet…she reacted.

Jack followed in her footsteps putting on his effects with slightly shaky hands.

"Did you have any more nightmares, Jack?"

He paused, his hat midway to his head. "No. Idon'tremembermydream."

She raised an eyebrow, but decided to leave it alone. I probably don't want to know what he dreamed anyway.

Looking up, after placing her hat atop her head, she found him watching her.

"Shall we?"

"We shall." She replied, ignoring the arm he offered her. He frowned and quickly turned to the door as if he had never presented it, waltzing out on deck without a backward glance, but Elizabeth was definitely looking at him. How does a man like him manage to walk like that? And to think I was in his bed a hairsbreadth away from kissing him only moments ago. Oh Lord I will never…get…to…sleep…tonight. She gritted her teeth.

"Not that I mind it, darling, but could you please stop looking at me backside and come'ere?" Jack called over his shoulder, stepping up to Gibbs and Barbossa. The latter laughed heartily as opposed to the former who merely coughed, causing Jack to grin wolfishly. He's enjoying this immensely and I'll have to sit in the man's lap all evening. What have I gotten myself into? I can only imagine all of the groping I'm going to be subjected to.

"I was not staring at your backside, Jack Sparrow."

"It's captain, luv, and yes you were."

"I most certainly was not."

"You most certainly were too." He mimicked in a rather high-pitched voice that bore a striking resemblance to her own.

Barbossa rolled his eyes. "Enough. We've no time for bickering. Let's go."

"You heard the man. Let's go." Elizabeth told Jack as she noticed Gibbs scrambling up next to Barbossa, leaving her to walk with Captain Ego who was currently grumbling about being the captain and giving orders.

During the walk, Elizabeth let her eyes wander. Really. Captain Sparrow's ass looks much more better than Hector Barbossa's and definitely better than Gibbs's. A small chuckle escaped her lips that did not go unnoticed by the handsome pirate captain to her left although he didn't look at her. He was aggravated about something as usual.

"What are ye giggling at now?"

"I do not giggle, Captain Sparrow. Pirates do not giggle."

"Then what was it then?"

"A chuckle."

"Ah, then what were ye chuckling at, Miss Prissy?"

"Your stiflingly large ego."

Gibbs guffawed good-naturedly, gaining a cold look from his Captain. "She hit that one on the nail." Barbossa muttered, amused.

Jack turned his nose up. "I do not have an overly large ego thank you very much. You just won't admit that you desire a famous pirate."

Everyone went silent, but Elizabeth knew what to say and did with a smirk causing Jack to pout. "I think Hector's a wee bit old for me."

"Decidedly." Said man harrumphed.

They lapsed into humorously uncomfortable silence as they neared their destination. Jack grabbed her wrist and pulled her up against him just as the other two went inside The Faithful Bride. "You know exactly who I meant." His proximity and that feral look in his eyes sent her stomach into fluttering somersaults, but instead of letting him see his effect on her she smirked.

"They're going to think something happened to us and right now I want rum, not you."

He rolled his eyes and followed her into the tavern, heading straight for the back table that Barbossa was currently sauntering towards while Gibbs went to get the two of them rum. "Elizabeth, would ye be so kind as to get the rum, darling?"

Nodding, she headed for the bar. Normally, she'd scowl at him until he would go and get it, but she had a bargain to keep and she desperately needed to regain his trust as well as give her some time to recover from that look he'd given her and the burn of his skin against hers. "Two rums." She said, passing the coin to the wench at the bar who promptly went to filling them up. Elizabeth, breathing deeply, glanced around the place with a grin. Men were scattered all over drinking, playing cards, and palavering. No bar fights had happened yet and the night was still young. Perhaps the smell was a little off-color, but not so bad as to cause one to cover their nose. The place was so familiar now that Elizabeth found it to be the only place in Tortuga aside from the bathhouse and the bakery that was worth a damn.

"Ello there, pet. Wanna go upstairs and give it a go?" A raspy voice asked her.

"I don't think so." She spat, glancing up at the ill-kempt man with the tobacco stains on his fingers and a wild look about his tangled gray hair and grizzled beard.

"Aw…come now, I promise I won't leave ye wanting." The ugly old drunkard said, grabbing her backside. A high-pitched whine escaped his mouth as she grabbed his crotch viciously.

"I don't think you want to be messing with me, dear. I'm bad for your health."

"A-all right…a-apologies, miss. No harm done." He replied as she let go and he swiftly walked away…well…as swiftly as he could with sore man parts, grumbling about insane, grabby pirate wenches.

Turning, she grabbed the mugs and hurriedly went back to the table in the far corner being sure not to slosh any of the delicious drink over the sides because Jack would not talk to her the rest of the evening if she did. He sat on the bench behind the table, against the wall, Barbossa in a chair at his left and Gibbs in a chair at his right, but there was no Jack Rackham and Anne Bonny in sight. As soon as she placed the mugs on the table, Jack's hands were on her waist pulling her into his lap, shifting so that they would both be comfortable and adding a "Thank you, darling."

"You're welcome." She returned warmly, relaxing against him and taking a swig of rum as he wrapped his arm about her waist casually.

Barbossa raised a sardonic eyebrow.

Elizabeth looked at him. "What? He's not had me yet if that's what you're thinking." Jack stiffened. Yet? Barbossa's other eyebrow shot up and Gibbs started another coughing fit, which caused Elizabeth to look at him. "And Mr. Gibbs, you really should get that cough seen to."

Jack started chuckling at the disbelieving look on the older man's face. "Hector, if I could have had her as she so candidly put it, neither of us would be in your company right now, I can assure you of that."

Elizabeth blushed and shifted slightly in Jack's lap resting her head back against his shoulder. He began to trace light circles against her stomach absentmindedly. "Aye. I reckon you wouldn't be." Barbossa murmured, amused.

"Well. Now that we've got that settled, where are Captain Rackham and Miss Bonny?" Gibbs asked.

As if on cue, the door came banging open rather loudly causing everyone to stop what they were doing and look up before ascertaining that it was a lover's feud and going back to what they were doing. A murmured question came from a masculine voice behind the beautiful female who stormed towards the bar, fuming. "Get your own bloody rum!"

Elizabeth glanced at Jack and murmured in his ear. "I'm guessing that's Anne Bonny."

"You'd be correct, luv." He replied sounding amused.

Rackham followed his obviously incensed lover to the bar and promptly got his own rum as instructed, but she didn't follow him when he began to make his way to their table looking miffed.

"Trouble in paradise?" Barbossa asked with a smirk.

"Aye. Thinks I'm an adulterer and…what were the words…ah yes…a nasty bilge-sucking poxied whoreson."

"Are you?" Jack questioned and then frowned. "An adulterer that is…"

Rackham looked at him sharply. "Of course not. I may be a lot of things, but I'd never-Elizabeth Swann?" He eyed her with surprise. "I'd no idea you were with Captain Sparrow here."

Jack stiffened underneath her and tightened his arm somewhat possessively. Setting her hand atop his comfortingly, she smirked at the tall man. "Hello there. Yes, I'm that treacherous bitch you spoke of earlier…" Barbossa choked on his rum as she glanced at him briefly. "Did you really think I was just admiring The Pearl, love?"

Jack stiffened again at the endearment she had never used on him.

"You two…know each other?" Gibbs questioned, cutting into the awkward tension.

"We've met." Elizabeth nodded. "At the bakery this morning in fact. I was humming A Pirate's Life For Me and he happened to recognize the tune. No need to get jealous, darling." She murmured that last to Jack, looking at him and deciding that her own favorite endearment would relax him.

"I'm not jealous." He replied defiantly.

Barbossa and Gibbs snorted simultaneously, earning a glare from their captain and a smirk from the other man.

Elizabeth merely grinned wickedly at them and then looked at Rackham who had plopped forlornly into the chair across from her and Jack. "I do hope it wasn't me she thought you were sleeping with Captain Rackham because if it was she deserves to know that that's not true."

"It had better not be true." Jack muttered under his breath, but Elizabeth caught it all the same and started stroking his hand again, the wicked grin coming back to her face. He IS jealous.

Barbossa saw this exchange and rolled his eyes.

Rackham merely took a long swig of rum. "Aye. 'Twas you she saw me with. Smashed the damned pound cake in me face, wrappings and all. I've been trying to explain all evening, but she won't have it. Headstrong, beautiful lass."

"Hell hath no fury." Barbossa commented.

Elizabeth glanced over at the woman…an equally striking woman. "Why, whatever would a woman like her be worrying about? She's exquisite."

Jack glanced over his shoulder and then at Elizabeth, but didn't say anything, as did the other men. Apparently, they thought that Elizabeth was even more beautiful than that fiery lass. Calico Jack gave a large sigh, gazing at the woman that was shooting him a glare.

Elizabeth raised an eyebrow and slowly unwound Jack's arms from her waist. "I'll go talk to her."

"I don't think that's such a good idea, luv." Jack muttered uneasily, reluctantly relinquishing his hold.

"Well…if you're so worried about my safety Captain Sparrow, why don't you go talk to her?"

"Oh no…you are not getting me slapped in the face tonight, Lizzie dear."

"All right then. I'm going." She replied leaving his lap and sauntering over to the damsel that was more of a distressing damsel than a distressed one, much like Elizabeth herself.

♥♥♥♥


Jack grinned admiringly at her backside and the sway of her hips as she sauntered lazily across the room, drumming her fingers on the hilt of her sword nervously.

Rackham exchanged glances with Gibbs and Barbossa and then looked at Jack's profile. "Bedded her yet?" He questioned abruptly, causing the two older men to snicker. Jack raised his eyebrows and turned back around.

"Lizzie Swann? She answers to no man."

"Yet she sits upon your lap."

"Aye. 'Twas a bargain."

"A bargain?"

"No need to go into detail."

"What type o'bargain?" Barbossa leered.

"The type that doesn't concern the likes of you." Jack replied and looked back over his shoulder again, watching as Anne leaped up from her chair, pointing her finger in Elizabeth's face. The other men lapsed into silence at this scene.


A/N: I'll admit, I may have gotten Jack a trifle bit off character at some points, but this is pure fluff and humor. Anyway, how'd you like it? What is Anne saying to Elizabeth? Did Jack and Elizabeth resolve all of his problems or is there something more still left to tell?