Special Something: Chapter 2
IN THE PINEAPPLE…..
SpongeBob paced back and forth in his kitchen. "Think, SpongeBob, think! What is special about me?" he asked himself.
Gary slithered into the kitchen.
"Gary!" SpongeBob grabbed him as he slid past. "I'm trying to think of my special something. Maybe you can help me out! What do you think of when you think of me?"
"Meow."
He dropped Gary to the floor. "Darn it Gary, I already fed you!"
"Meow."
SpongeBob thought for a moment. "I see your point." He nodded. "But I meant, what do you think of when you think of SPONGES?"
Gary began to hack.
SpongeBob crossed his arms. "Very funny," he said sarcastically.
The snail continued to cough and gasp for air.
"I get your point already!"
The hacking sounds became even louder—Gary couldn't stop.
"Oh-my-gosh! You're coughing up a slime-ball, aren't you?" After briefly running around in a couple of panicked circles, SpongeBob picked up Gary and ran towards the laid out newspaper in the corner. "Just hold on Gary, you can make it, we're almost to the news—"
SpongeBob looked down to see the wet, dripping slime-ball fall to the floor just inches away from the newspaper.
He sighed and put Gary back down. "Guess I better clean this up." But he only took two steps toward his cleaning supplies before a realization stopped him in his tracks. He gasped with excitement. "Gary! I just thought of my special something!"
"Meow??"
"I'll refill your water dish later—can't you see I'm having an epiphany!"
"Meow……..."
"I'm a sponge, right? Well, what do people use sponges for?"
"Meow."
"Well, I was thinking of cleaning sponges, though I guess you're right too." Then he smiled widely. "Sponges were made for cleaning! I'm going to use my special ability to do good!"
With that, he ran out the door. His silhouette became smaller and smaller as he walked toward the still dark horizon. "I'm off to fulfill my spongey destiny, Gary! Don't chew on the house plants while I'm gone!"
Gary glanced over to the slime-ball beside him, which SpongeBob hadn't clean up. "Meow?"
SpongeBob approached the Krusty Krab. "Where better to begin than my second favorite place in all the deep blue sea?" He stopped and hugged the frame of the restaurant. "Mr. Krabs will be so proud of me when he sees the Krusty Krab cleaned top to bottom!"
He looked up at the glass door. "Hmmm. I don't have a key. Guess I'll just have to find my own way in!" he said with a shrug. SpongeBob karate-kicked the door and shattered it to pieces. For the second time that day, he picked glass shards out of himself. "Oh, boy!" he exclaimed giddily. "Here's something to clean up! I knew this was my special something…. maybe it's my lacerations from the glass talking, but I'm getting a tingly feeling inside! Could it be?" His eyes were starry. "I've found my calling!"
For the next few hours, SpongeBob mopped, wiped, scrubbed, swept, dusted, washed, and de-Krustied nearly everything in the restaurant, even the Krabby Patties.
SpongeBob stepped back and admired his hard work. The place glimmered around him as he stood, beaming with pride. "It's beautiful! I just love sparkles!" He frowned. "But I feel like I forgot something…." His eyes wandered around, each looking in different directions, for anything not sparkling. His left eye froze, fixated upwards. "The crow's nest, of course! How could I forget Mr. Krab's favorite place to spy on people?"
After realigning his eyes, he shimmied up the pole. He whipped out the washcloth he'd been using all night, but a foghorn sound and arising stink-waves let him know that it was too dirty now to be used. "No matter!" said SpongeBob, waving it off. "I've got plenty of cleaning supplies!" He pulled out a pink sponge and began to scrub.
As he scrubbed, a strange sensation came over him. "What is this I'm feeling now?" he asked himself. "Oh, no, it's….. the bitter sting of IRONY!" He doubled over in pain. "I'm scrubbing with a SPONGE!"
SpongeBob rolled around madly, beginning to cry. He jumped out of the crow's nest and landed with a thud. His tears sprayed in all different directions as he bawled loudly. "It's..… just..…too...…much…...irony!"
It was almost opening time, and Mr. Krabs was approaching the Krusty Krab. "Ooh, I can't wait to caress that fiver in the back of the cash register," he said to himself, making his way up the sidewalk. He stopped at the entrance. "Hmm. I remember having a door here."
Just then, the sounds of SpongeBob's dejected wails caught his attention. He rushed in to see him rolling in a puddle of tears. "SpongeBob! What in the name of Davy Jones' locker are you doing here…. without any pants?!"
"Crying!" he sobbed.
"Well, stop it! Customers are gonna be comin' in here soon! Now suck it up, put your little square pants on, and get to the grill!" he ordered, pointing a claw to the kitchen.
SpongeBob was lying on his back. "I can't, Mr. Krabs."
The crab sighed. "Aye…... what's wrong, lad?"
"I…...I…..." He sniffled. "I was trying to find my special something because Squidward told me to because it's SpongeBob and Squidward Friendship Day and I came over to his house this morning but he said find this out and I talked to Gary and I realized I'm a sponge and sponges are for cleaning so I thought that was my special something so I cleaned the Krusty Krab but then I realized I used a sponge to do it I didn't even use myself so didn't count and now I still don't know what my special something is!"
"Whoa, boy! Talk about a run-on sentence!" Mr. Krabs pulled SpongeBob up from the floor. "Is that all you're crying about? Something that doesn't even make sense?"
"That's not all, Mr. Krabs." He quivered. "I also felt the burning sting of irony!"
"Ouch….. I remember the first time I felt the sting of irony. It was at this seafood restaurant and…. nevermind, I don't wanna talk about it."
"What should I do, Mr. Krabs?"
"If you wanna find your special something, you gotta reach deep inside yourself."
SpongeBob inserted his hand into one of his holes and pulled out his pancreas. "Like this?"
Mr. Krabs frowned. "Uh…."
"Or this?" he pulled out one of his kidneys.
"No—"
"Or this?" He looked at the organ and blinked. "I don't even know what this one is!" he said, and tossed it aside.
"Stop!"
"Or how about this?" He reached in and pulled out his intestine. But the more he pulled, the more came. He continued pulling it out like it was that old gag with the tied handkerchiefs. "Ooh, it just keeps coming!"
Just then, the first couple customers walked in. "I'll have a Krabby Pat—" a fish began to announce, but he stopped when he saw a pants-less sea sponge pulling out his intestine with a crab, standing in a puddle of tears and now a bit of blood.
"What's the matter, dear?" asked a fish from behind. Then she suddenly slipped on SpongeBob's previously tossed organ. "Ohh….." she groaned, holding her head.
"SpongeBob! Get out of here before you scare away all me customers!" barked Mr. Krabs.
"But, sir, what about my special something?"
"Oh, you're gonna get a special something alright…" he said, shaking with anger.
"Okay, okay, I'm leaving!" SpongeBob hurried for the door, afraid his boss was going to explode.
He rushed down the street. "Now what do I do?" He grinned. "I know! I'll ask the smartest person I know!"
SpongeBob turned around and happily marched toward the treedome. "I'm ready! I'm ready!" He stumbled dizzily for a moment. "... organs hurting! Still ready!"
I have to stop here because it's... REVIEW TIME!! Yep, so review away.
...please?
