Disc: I do not own the characters or shows of NCIS.
Couple: Leroy Jethro Gibbs & Anthony DiNozzo
Story: Season five episode six "Chimera". This is after the episode, there was a fear factor there that his team would get sick and die within twenty four hours. His worse fear was losing the one man he loved, Anthony DiNozzo, he had been through a few scares but he had never let it show to anyone, not even Tony.
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Tony and I had been causal lovers for more than six months now. After tough cases, or when we had some free time, we'd be here, at my house, working on the boat, making love and just watching some movie or the other together. But after we had returned from that boat, where Ducky had told us there was a chance of some air born disease on the ship killing us. Well, it had scared Tony, and I knew it had, but he had acted like his normal self. He was trying not to let people see what was going on with in his mind. It had been about two weeks now and Tony hadn't come to see me once when we were off work. He avoided my eyes at work when I wasn't giving him an order. Something was wrong and I couldn't place it, and that was starting to bug me. Even more, I wasn't sure if it was something I had done! When Tony sat at his desk and started to load a box with his things, I stood up and walked over to him. The rest of the team just sat and watched us.
"Tony, what the hell are you doing?" He started to load some more things into the box. I grabbed his hand and he looked up at me.
"Leaving the team!" I looked at him, pissed as hell.
"How long has this been planned? And who in hell decided this?" He continued to load the box.
"I asked for it about twelve days ago. When Kate came on the team, you just had me and her. Tim will make a good senior agent, he's come into his own since he joined us, more then four years ago." The rest of the team was just sitting there, listening to us, absolutely stunned.
"I didn't authorize this and I won't allow it, Tony. You're my senior agent and you're on my team. What the hell are your reasons for leaving us, Tony?" He finished loading his things and set the box on the desk. He looked me straight in the eyes.
"You don't have to authorize it, that's the Director job! Sometimes, you need to understand your not top dog all the time! You have a boss, just like you are boss. Things change and I need a change. You have no right to hold me here on your team, and you're sure as hell not going to."
I was shocked at the way he had spoken to me and I watched him leave. He had grabbed the box and was in the elevator before I could stop him and he was gone. I told the rest of the team to go home and that I would deal with this. I went to Tony's apartment, where I used my key. I walked in, going straight passed him on the couch, and went into the kitchen and set the pizza on the table. He followed me in.
"What the hell are you doing here, Gibbs?" I looked at him. I had noticed all the boxes that were packed. It looked like most of his things were ready to be moved.
"Since when did you start calling me Gibbs outside of work? I thought we'd got to the point where I called you Tony and you called me Jet or Jethro?"
I wasn't ready to ask him why the hell all his things were packed, like he was leaving us completely. I knew that he'd never stayed more than two years at jobs before, but he had been with us the longest, seven years now. He looked at me.
"You're not my boss anymore and the whole casual sex thing is over, so I thought it would be best to call you Gibbs now." I looked at him as he stood leaning against the door frame into the kitchen.
"What the hell did I do to you, Tony, to make you leave the team, and me?" He looked at me and then closed his eyes for a second, then he looked at me with those beautiful green eyes.
"You did nothing, Jethro, this has nothing to do with you." I looked at him.
"It sure as hell feels like it does, Tony. Where are you going, almost all your shit is packed, isn't it?" He went to sit in the living room on the couch that was still there. I followed and sat on a matching recliner he had there. He took a deep breath.
"Got a new place, moving to a new place, a little smaller and a good location." I looked at him and took a deep breath again. I wanted to keep my temper under control.
"Tony, seven years, we've been together for seven years and lovers for six months. You're taking both away from me." He looked down and then back to me.
"I don't want casual anymore! I am tired of just being with someone for the sex and not having what people in relationships have. I thought I wouldn't want that again, since Jeanne, but I do. I miss that feeling." I closed my eyes, that didn't hurt. It was true, we had never talked about being more. I moved to him and sat beside him and looked at him.
"Tony, you're all I want and you're all I need. I was scared to tell you that I am in love with you. Scared you wouldn't want a relationship with me. Scared that it would only scare you away." He looked at me, shocked but he gave a small smile.
"Jethro, even if you love me, it's not going to get me back on your team! Brad says I need to take it easy, that's what I plan to do." I looked at him.
"Fine, don't come back to the team but don't leave me, Tony, please." I looked at him. "What's wrong? Why does Brad want you to take it easy? Why wasn't I told? I'm your next of kin and Brad was told to report to me when something came up with you." He looked down.
"Took you off as my next of kin, about two years ago, when I got sick a few times." I stroked his face, making him look up at me and I kissed him, slowly.
"No matter what is wrong, I want to know. Put me back on as your next of kin, please? I can do my job and worry about you at the same time, Tony." He looked at me.
"I won't put you back on my next of kin. As to what's wrong with me, I'm not ready to tell anyone yet." I kissed him slowly, sliding my hand along his face as he kissed me back. I whispered softly.
"We can stop the casual sex thing, lets move up a step, Tony." He stood up and took my hands and lead me to the bedroom. He handed me some sleeping pants and he took his own.
"Do you really love me, Jethro?" I stroked his face and kissed him softly.
"Yes, Tony, I love you and I want this to work. Can we give it a chance?" I pulled him against me as I kissed him again, softly, before looking into his eyes.
"Can you wait until morning for an answer, Jethro?" I didn't want to, I slide my hands down his hips and kissed his cheek.
"Yeah, Tony, I can! So the sleeping pants an invite to sleep over?" He smiled, laid his head on my shoulder and began nuzzling my neck softly.
"I want you to hold me tonight, Jethro. I want to know you're there, all night. Maybe we can use this weekend to figure things out. Jethro, I want to hold out on sex, even if I chose to try this." I kissed him softly.
"I am right here and I am going nowhere, Tony. I can hold back on making love to you until you're ready, Tony."
He nodded some and kissed me softly. He went to the bathroom to change. When he came back, I was already in bed. He laid on his side and I rolled to my side, I slid my hands along his stomach, looking at him.
"Jethro?" He said. I pulled the covers over us and started kissing him, softly.
"Hmm?" I looked at him, there was a scared look on his face. I stroked his hair softly.
"Tony, tell me!" He nuzzled his head into my chest and he closed his eyes.
"Brad says I am in the first stages of leukemia. It's not a major leukemia, he said there a very high chance I can go into remission. I can fight this! He said there is a small chance that I could lose the fight as well. Can you handle being with me while I am going through the treatments? Because there will be good and bad days."
I ran my hands over his chest and looked at him. Now I was scared! I didn't expect this, I mean, I expected maybe because of his lungs, he couldn't do field work like we did on our team anymore.
"Tony, is Brad sure that's what it is? If it is, yes, I'll be there with you, all the way. Instead of you moving into a smaller place, I want you to move in with me. I'll feel better with you at the house." He took a deep breath and he stroked my hand as it lay on his chest.
"Yeah, Brad is sure, and he almost sure that I'll go into remission because we've caught it at the early stages." He looked at me.
"You sure you want me to live with you?" I nodded as I kissed him softly.
"I won't worry as much! You always told me how safe you felt at my house. I think it would be best if you had somewhere safe to live, when you have your bad days, through the treatments. This mean we're going to try this couple thing, Tony?" I hoped he would say yes and not make me wait until tomorrow. He closed his eyes, pressing his face to my chest again, as I stroked his back and shoulders.
"Yes, I want to try it. I just want to be with you. I'm scared and I don think I can handle this one alone. I know Brad is telling me that there's a damn good chance I won't die. But I don't want to die alone if it comes to that." I kissed him softly and wiped the tears from his face. It was rare to see Tony scared.
"I don't want to talk about you dying unless that's what's happening! For now, we're going to fight this thing, together." I looked at him as the tears stopped. I needed to be strong for Tony. I knew there were going to be times when he was going to show his fear.
"Deal! We won't talk about it until it happens, Jethro. You promise to stay with me through it all, right, Jethro?" I nodded some and touched his face.
"You have my word that I am going to be here with you through it all." He turned so I could spoon against his back, holding him close. Sliding the covers over us more, I kissed his shoulder.
"Let's get some sleep, Tony. We'll talk more tomorrow, okay?"
I had to laugh to myself as I head his soft breathing, he had already fallen asleep. Fear was gripping at my heart, I hoped Brad was right because I wasn't up for losing the man I love. I stroked his shoulder softly, and then down his side until I finally let myself fall asleep. Even after everything he had told me, the sleep was peaceful, just because I was able to hold him in my arms as I slept. It was always like this, when we slept together, I felt safe knowing he was close to me.
