貴女は愛しています
We'll be together forever, my love…
「夢見てもいいじゃないの」 - "Can't I Even Dream?" by Hatsune Miku
Translation by motokokusanagi2009
I'm desperately looking for you
I even let go of what I have possessed
Winds blow as if it slashed my ears
My freezing body feels nothing but pain
I'm here, It's really painful
My heart is filled with pains
If I stumble while running,
I can never go back
I'm here, Get me out of here, my prince
Can't I even dream?
In the rain penetrating my eyes
I pretend to be crazy with a smirk
I'm here, It's overflowing
I keep bearing this love
If my screams don't reach you,
It's completely unworthy
I'm here, Get me out of here, my prince
Can't I even dream?
The forest was no longer jagged and dangerous, for with the light of day came illumination. Bare branches were no longer reaching out to drag anything and everything into the abyss. They were now perches for robins and blue jays to cock their heads and study all with their beady little eyes. Bright bursts of color in the green and brown wood were the birds, along with the flowers dotting the landscape. A meadow surrounded this tower and village, wildflowers sprouting up all throughout the swaying grasses as the petals bloomed and reached for the sunny blue sky. The most beautiful among them all were the irises with their simple three petal design, each veined with white, black, and pink towards the center where small antennae-like threads reached out, topped with yellow pollen enticing butterflies to land. What was especially beautiful about the flowers were their distinctive, violet-blue color; soft to the touch and a beacon in the swaying grasses of green and yellow.
A beautiful day, blessed by the warm sun and clear skies. Yet it had not always been this peaceful. Not always had the sun's light even been able to reach the ground through thick, roiling clouds attacking the lands with a fierce rally of wind, rain, and hail as lightning flashed and thunder rumbled.
Those days, those nights, would always be the most painful. The gaping hole in her heart would be amplified with each crack of thunder, each flash of lightning. The hail hammered the stone walls, echoing like countless fingers tapping, scratching, trying to get in. Those times, as the storm reigned supreme, tears would well up outside her sleep as she cowered in a corner, eyes wide, hair disheveled, wrapped in a sheet of cotton as she shivered fearfully. The wall was cold. Her heart thumped. So cold… so pained… It hurt so much, the tears stung her eyes like the hail to the stone.
Another flash, another crack. She cried out in fear, leaping from her crouch to race to the door, stumbling over the sheet and slamming into the ground to skid across the brick painfully. In a crumpled heap, the sobs would rip through her chest as the tears overflowed. Through the open window, far too high for her to reach, the wind whipped through, slashing at her freezing body as she wailed in agony, fear, and loss. But she was trapped. There was no one to help her. No one to calm her or tell her 'It's alright. There's nothing to be afraid of,' like they used to. For she was all alone, caged in this tower by the king. These times especially, his words rang in her ears. 'I love you. That is why I must do this.' And she'd choke on her sobs, curling tight into a ball as the hail mercilessly pelted her.
"I'm here. Get me out here, my prince," she'd whisper to herself, her words falling upon no ears but her own. There was no one to hear, no one to answer, no one to help. For she was all alone, banished to this isolation by a king who claimed he loved her.
She used to scream to the walls, 'How is this love!? How could you do this to me and still claim that!?' to receive no reply. It wasn't like she'd ever expected one, anyway, but still, she wished. She hoped. She prayed. All to no avail. For there was no one to hear but herself and these cold stone walls.
As thunder crashed and another bolt of lightning sizzled, she's cry out in fear once more, leaping to her feet, pounding on the door with pale fists. "Let me out! I beg of you, let me out!!" The guards never responded and she was left to slide to the floor, back pressed tightly against the wood as she stared in horror out the window at the roiling clouds, forever pummeled with the icy hail, all the while murmuring, "I'm here, I'm here…"
To who did she call out these words? To whose name did she whisper in her dreams? It was her true love, the one she was forever parted from by these accursed walls and that impenetrable door because of that absolute king who none dared question.
Either way, there was no method through which he could reach her nor any way she could reach him. They were both trapped, both caged.
And as she sobbed, whispering these lonely words, she'd drift into her memories.
'Good morning, Princess.'
'Good morning. What are we to do today?'
'Well, the weather is truly glorious, so I was thinking of taking some time outside.'
'Really? What are we going to do?'
It wasn't storming now, yet her mind always seemed to drift to this memory when she was troubled—which was more often than not.
To watch the wildflowers swaying in the wind. How she wished she could see it. But the window was too high, so she was left to simply imagine the scene.
Back against the door, for hours she'd just sit on the floor, staring up at that window which was always open. She could hear people walking above, on the turrets, and the murmurs of their conversations would drift through to her deprived ears, but their words were always blurred and indecipherable. It was just a monotone of voices. All this white noise—birds chirping, branches and grasses swaying, blurred voices—would sing a lullaby as her heavy eyes narrowed and eventually closed.
Another second. Another minute. Another hour. Another day. Another week. Another year.
It all blurred together just like the guards' voices.
An endless prison with nothing to distract, all she could do was sit an reminisce or sleep away time.
How she wished she could simply close her eyes one day and wake to find this all to be a monotone nightmare. To wake in her bed and find his smiling face to greet her, blue eyes flashing in the sunlight with wildflowers swaying outside the window.
Every time she woke, however, it was to these gray walls.
In this eternal prison, all she could do was dream…
