Cause and Effect
Ch. 2: The Effect
We arrived back at the estate, silent and solemn. What could we—what could I say? The second it happened, I knew. I did not need an expert opinion or evaluation; I had magical abilities. I was a mage.
Neither Hunter nor I feared magic, at least not particularly. We, like many other non-mages, were wary and trusted templars to keep us safe from rogue mages or, worse yet, blood magic. Regardless of the way we felt about magic in general, the idea of me having, using, controlling it...
Hunter and I shared a great deal of trepidation. It radiated off of him, practically tangible, and I felt it consuming me. Oddly, though, the source of the fear I held was unknown to me. At first, it seemed because of my newfound abilities, but the longer Hunter remained shaken and silent...
Perhaps my fear stemmed from the thought of losing him?
I found myself wondering, does he hate me now? Are things between us going to change? So overwhelmed with these thoughts, I hardly noticed his hand on my shoulder, gently shaking me. With a start, I met his eyes. Like always, they were a mirror image of mine.
"Colette," He said softly, his other cupping my face. "You need to calm yourself before one of the servants or, worse, our family sees you in such a state."
Hesitantly, I nodded. "I'll... I'll try. I'm sorry, Hunter, I'm so—" I stopped short when he smirked, furrowing my brow in confusion. "What's so funny?"
"You are horrible at calming down," He stated. Simple, matter-of-fact, calm. How can he be so calm?
I grabbed his hand and held it tightly. "All these years, why so suddenly? Why me?"
Hunter pursed his lips thoughtfully and tugged me up the stairs, away from the main hall. "It's no secret the Trevelyans have magic in their bloodline. That it has surfaced in you could mean a great destiny is on the horizons?"
"Great destiny," I repeated with a half-hearted laugh. "What mage has ever had a great destiny? The only thing being a mage earns you is a lifetime locked away in a tower."
"The Hero of Ferelden—"
"—was an exception," I stopped him. "She was a mage who, through skill and luck, earned a spot among the Wardens. I could never hope for such greatness."
He halted his steps and turned to face me, a serious glint reflected in his eyes. "Michelle Colette Trevelyan, you try hard at everything you do. If you wanted, you could become a mage above all others just like that. Do not sell yourself short, especially in front of me."
We kept walking after his short outburst, and I smiled in spite of the situation. Something about hearing my dear cousin say such a thing, even if I disagreed, made my chest swell with happiness. How could I have doubted him for even a second? Hunter was always like this: complimenting me, encouraging me, teasing me to lift my spirits. Try as he might to hide it beneath witty one-liners and mischief, there existed a kindness within him I doubted anyone else could ever match.
I waited until we entered the family library and closed the door behind us to speak more. While Hunter locked the door, I wandered over to the couch and collapsed upon it.
I sighed, louder than intended, and confessed, "I don't want to go to a circle. I'm happy here, in our home, near our woods... I want to stay with our family. With you."
Taking a seat beside me, he responded softly, "That would be dangerous. Especially if you were discovered later. They might make you Tranquil for living as an apostate."
I tensed and glanced at him. "You think so?"
Shrugging, he answered, "I don't know. Guess it depends on the circle involved, right? Of course, if they tried that, I wouldn't allow it. I'd break into the circle and kidnap you. Anyone who tried to stop me would answer to my bow."
I laughed, thinking his words at least half a joke, but he stared at me with the same intensity as earlier. In a low and quiet voice, he said, "I'm not kidding, Colette. You and I might only be cousins physically, but you mean more to me than anyone else. I won't let anyone hurt you."
"And what if you were killed trying to rescue me?" I returned, my voice just as low. "How do you think I would feel, for however long I could feel?"
He fell silent, eyes searching mine. Finally, he sighed and leaned against the back of the couch. I scooted closer and rested my head on his shoulder. We remained there for a moment, and a need to say something and break the silence built up inside me.
I gently poked his cheek, trying so hard to lighten the mood with a playful gesture. His gaze dropped to mine, and his lips twitched into a smile.
"You know," I said, softer than before, tears welling in my eyes. "I feel the same. You mean more to me than anyone else... And I won't let anyone hurt you."
He leaned in and placed a delicate kiss on my forehead. Then, just like always, he held me tight against his chest and let me cry. I hated how emotional I got, but his hugs were undoubtedly a benefit.
A knock on the door ended our moment as Hunter reluctantly stood and unlocked the door. A servant poked her head in and announced each of our parents were looking for us. We groaned in unison, earning a chuckle from the servant before she left.
As we left the library, Hunter pulled me close and whispered, "It's your decision. I'll support and protect you no matter what."
I nodded and watched him slip away in the opposite direction. My heart felt heavy again, but after talking with Hunter, the weight didn't crush me so completely. I headed for the main hall where my parents waited, thoughts racing in my head. The walk to the hall was both the longest it had ever been... and much too short.
-LA-
My foot impatiently tapping on the floor, my heart racing, a cold sweat beading on my forehead... I must have looked foolish. I sat on the war table, waiting for the advisers. Waiting for the report. Cullen came in first, eyes betraying his concern. He walked over and sat beside me, wrapping his arm around my shoulders. A small but happy sigh slipped past my lips as I leaned into him.
I hadn't told him all the details yet, but he was smart. He sensed how important this was to me. He also sensed how absolutely fragile I was. In a way, he reminded me of Hunter.
Josephine entered next, softly smiling at Cullen's and my display of affection. I was grateful Cullen, despite the blush rising to his cheeks, refused to pull away. I brushed against his other hand and entangled our fingers, enjoying the happiness while I could. I wanted to be positive. I wanted to believe in the best outcome.
But... I knew. When Leliana walked in holding a tarnished, yet intact silver chain with our family crest dangling from it, I felt my knees give out. Had Cullen not been at my side and caught me, I would have fallen to the ground. My poor advisers... My poor Cullen... They were confused, bewildered even, by my reaction. I couldn't even explain between the sobs. Cullen, bless him, tried so hard to comfort me despite his confusion.
He asked Leliana and Josephine to give us a moment. Slightly uncertain, Leliana offered me the chain, which I took with shaky hands. She and Josephine excused themselves, leaving me with Cullen, who held me and allowed me to sob against him. Once my sobs quieted, he pulled back to look me in the eyes, tenderly brushing his hand against my cheek.
I could see in his eyes he wanted an explanation, but he wouldn't force one while I was so distraught. Nevertheless, he deserved something, so I told him. I told him of my beloved cousin. I told him of how I found out I was a mage and how Hunter supported me. I told him how my family contacted me about Hunter's presence at the Conclave, which until then I had no clue about, and how I had hoped he didn't arrive because, of course, he never takes these things seriously. And then...
Then, through another round of sobs, I told him about the day I left for the circle when Hunter and I somehow managed to get the same going-away gift for each other. I showed him the necklace beneath my clothing: a silver chain with our family's crest hanging from it.
Cullen's smart. He figured out the rest.
Thus ends the very late conclusion to this two-shot. Yes, I have my two Trevelyans whose whole story is that, whichever one I'm playing, the other one didn't survive the conclave. I don't know why I make these sad headcanons about my babies. I just do. I like to torture myself emotionally as much as possible.
Anyways! I hope you forgive me for the long wait, and I hope it is up to my and your standards.
Until next time, thank you for reading. -LA
