The first thing I did when I got home was check my weight on the scale. It had become a slight ritual, as If I would suddenly lose 20 pounds over night.

My heart beat increased as the scale calculated my weight. Each second felt longer and longer. Only if you are a girl with body issues will you understand this. It's like waiting the three minutes before your Cup of Noodles is ready. Wait, some people may not get that either, but anyway it's tortuous.

I kept my fingers cross that I would weigh less than I did last time, 137.

And the verdict was in, 143. I felt my cheeks grow hot, how could I gain six pounds in one day? I felt so fat and defeated that it never dawned on me that my school uniform alone could easily weigh six pounds.

I felt terrible, and something I do to get out of my 'depression' is play my guitar.

I started playing the guitar when I was six, I was never any good at sports, so Nana suggested I take up an instrument instead. We only found out afterwards that my singing voice was alright too, so after eight years of hard practice and professional teachers, I'm finally to the point where I can sing and play the guitar at the same time.

But today I didn't feel like singing so I just strummed gently playing different chords. I lost myself in the music, playing songs that didn't exist, and writing them as I went along.

A knock on my door took me out of my world of music. "Miss," a maid opened the door and said, "Your mother and father wish to speak to you."

My heart jumped, "They are here?" I asked a tad bit too excited.

"Oh no miss," she replied, "Your father is the telephone and your mother is on video chat."

I let my shoulders slump, "Oh okay."

I trudged down the stairs and entered the 'communication room'. It's a giant room in our house with a projector to talk to other people.

I sat down in the chair in front of the giant screen and for the first thirty seconds before I connected to my parents, I was stuck with a giant picture of me. I ducked my head until the beep told me my parents could see me.

"Marina!" my mom's voice, echoed through the room, "How was your first day of school?"

I put a fake smile on and said, "It was great mom."

My mother was one of those girls who I hated cause of their looks, but was always trying so hard to become. She had the same blonde hair as me, except it shone somehow, and was always gracing her slim shoulders. Her eyes however were a emerald green and shone like the sun.

"Marina," my father said, clearly kid of ticked, "we are making time for you, give us some more details."

"O-oh," I said looking down, "alright," it had always been this way with my dad; he only had a certain amount of time for everything. My dad was the type of guy every girl wanted, handsome, reliable, and hardworking.

He had dark brown hair, styled like most business men, in a nicely groomed style. His eyes were grey, like mine, but a much darker shade of grey. He had sharp features and an angular face. He had slightly Asian features, but only if you look close enough, such as the slight tilt of his eyes.

"Ren," my mother said to my dad, "give her some time, it her first day of school." My dad just sighed slightly and my mom continued, "did you make any friends?"

I wasn't sure how to answer this. I mean Rei and I weren't friends yet. Were we? Sakura, Rin, and Suki, kept telling me they were my friends, I guess we're friends. "Yeah mom," I responded still eternally unsure, "I have made three friends," and then with sudden confidence, "their names are Rin, Suki, and Sakura."

"That's great Marina," my mom was smiling, "its wonderful that you have made friends already, are they nice?"

"Yeah, they are."

"What about your grades Marina?" my dad butted in.

"Dad, it's only the first day of school."

He seemed disappointed, but just said, "Marina I have a business meeting right now, I will be in contact with your teachers in regard to your grades."

Then he was gone. My mother just sighed, "Your father, he's just very busy." I guess she could see my sudden sadness, because she said, "So Marina any cute boys?"

I just smiled, "Not really."

"Don't worry, you'll find a great boy there," she said with sudden confidence.

As I laid in bed that night I thought about what my mom had said, What great boy will want a girl who doesn't look good in a bikini? I checked the time, 7:04, I decided to watch some anime before bed.

The reason why I loved Japan is that anime plays on TV, its not like the US where you need Youtube or Netflix to watch it. The anime I saw that was on was Shugo Chara. It was the first episode, after the first three episodes I wished I could have been like Amu, just changing myself with the help of guardian characters. But, at least in my opinion, I was doomed to a life of shame and hiding.

'Well,' I thought, 'at least I have friends like Sakura who will always tell me the truth.'

"Oh and Marina, will you carry these for me?" Sakura asked while shoving her mountain of books into my arms. It hadn't been five minutes since I arrived at school and she was asking me to do something.

'This is what friends do Marina,' my brain said, 'and you want friends.'

"Umm where do you want me to bring these Sakura?" I asked trying to be nice.

She turned to me and smiled, "Just to class 1-b," she said as if that explained everything.

I had no idea where class 1-b is, so I wandered around, until a voice said, "Found you!"

In a split second I pounced on by a mob of Maroon. "Yui," I yelled surprised.

"Marina we need to talk and-" she noticed the book that were currently scattered on the floor, "why do you have all those books?"

"Well you see, I need to bring them to class 1-b," I explained.

She looked puzzled, "Then why are you in the 2nd year quarters? Here," she took some of the books, "let me show you." She led the way to class 1-b with a goofy smile on her face.

Once the books were dropped off she said, "Why did you need to bring them here, I thought you were in class 1-A"

I tried to explain, "Well I am, but my friend, well, wanted me to bring them to her."

I tried hiding my face from Yui, and began to walk away, "Wait!" she yelled running after me, "We need to talk for the sake of the Chorus, after you left Ryo and I choose a theme."

I turned around, this had caught my interest, "We going to be doing-"

"Excuse you," a voice rang out, "what are you doing?" it was Sakura.

"Something that doesn't involve you," Yui said plainly, "our theme is-"

"Hey are you the person that made Marina cry yesterday?" Sakura said. Was she defending me?

"Cry?" Yui said, "What do you mean?"

"Yeah, you must of; you were lying to her right?" Sakura gave Yui an evil glare, "Don't come near her again, she is leaving your chorus, come on Marina."

I quickly got up to go to Sakura's side, "Marina is this your friend, you can do much better," Yui yelled after me.

"Just ignore her," Sakura said, "she is just a jealous liar."

I followed Sakura feeling safe, like a blanket was wrapped around me. I felt protected.

When I went into Science Rei was eagerly awaiting my arrival. She waved with a bit too much enthusiasm, "Good morning Marina!"

I lifted my hand up and gave a slight wave, "Good morning Rei."

"Aren't you so happy that the first day is over. I'm not as nervous now either, how about you?"

I shook my head, "Not as nervous."

"I'm so excited for this weekend, my parents promised to take me shopping in Tokyo, hey do you want to go Marina? IT will be a lot of fun. We can see all the styles, and magazines, and it can be a great learning experience for me too. What do you say?"

I found myself smiling, "Sure, I'll be there." Rei was not a shy girl; at least not once you got to know her. It's strange It's almost like I have more than one type of me. I feel much more confident with Rei, but to be honest I enjoy the safety of Sakura, I can still be invisible with her, but still have friendship.

"Kyouya I'm serious. This young princess yesterday was crying in the hallway." It was that voice, I shoved my head into my book as my heart sped up, "the strangest thing was that when I tried to comfort her, she just ran, like I was some huge monster," he paused for a minute, "KYOUYA, AM I TURNING INTO SOME MONSTER?"

"Well Tamaki some girls may just not be impressed with your looks."

"Kyouya this girl is very strange and sad," he stopped for a minute as if to think about something, "Do you think a trip to our club will help?"

'Huh what club?' I thought, this boy, Tamaki has to be talking about me. 'keep your head dwon Marina, stay invisible.

"Marina," Rei said into my ear , "What's wrong?"

I hushed her and tried to keep listening. "No Kyouya we cannot just let her be, it is our duty as the host club to make every girl happy."

'Host club? What's that?'

"Tamaki don't you think that if the girl ran away from you, you should just let her be?" I was starting to like his friend, Kyouya.

"Hmmm I don't know maybe your right-" Tamaki said.

"On the other hand if you do get her to be a regular it will bring in more profits," Kyouya said.

I was starting to hate Kyouya.

"Okay class," Fukuda-sensei entered, "Today we will be learning about-" and the class began. It was rather boring and as soon as it was done I bolted out of there.

By the time lunch rolled around, my stomach was growling, probably due to my new 'Diet', which consisted of no breakfast and a small lunch. Sakura was waiting outside the lunchroom for me. She waved me over, I went over and smiled.

"Hey Marina, what do you have to eat," she said eyeing my Bento.

"Oh just some rice balls and mini omelets," I said to her.

"Oh," she said grabbing my bento "sounds yummy."

"Wait what are you doing?" I asked somewhat alarmed.

"Oh did you want this," she asked innocently, "I thought you were full already." She said with a bitter edge looking at my stomach.

"Oh I'm" Starving, "Fine."

"Oh that's what I thought," she waved me over to her table with Suki and Rin.

When Suki saw me without food she said, "Oh are you hungry Marina?"

She was about to give over some of her curry when Sakura said, "No Suki, she is just stupid for forgetting her lunch, isn't that right Marina?"

I couldn't argue so I just said, "Y-yeah, silly me."

"So why can't she have some of my curry," Suki combatted.

"Because, she looks like she ate enough." Although it stung what she said a little, okay a lot, I was still happy that she was being honest.

As the days went on I found myself being tied to Sakura's hip. Every day I would find myself handing my lunch over to her, I guess I should be happy, she wanted me to be skinnier.

I checked the scale, the Saturday that I was going to Tokyo with Rei, 132, "Wow" I smiled to myself, "I'm becoming skinnier." I looked at myself in the mirror and didn't see much of a change. I just shrugged it off, I couldn't wait to tell Sakura on Monday.

I threw on a pair of jean Capris and an orange tank top. I was just finished with brushing my teeth when my maid called for me.

"Miss your friend Rei is here with a car to pick you up."

"Yes, tell her I'll be right down." I quickly walked down the staires and saw Rei at the bottom, she was waving.

"Good morning," she yelled to me while I was at the top of the staires.

"Good Morning," I feigned a smile, I did't tell Sakura that I was doing this today, 'I hope she doesn't get mad.

Just then my phone ringed, "Hello," I said.

"What are your plans for the day?" Sakura said in an accusing voice.

"I am going to Tokyo with-"

She cut me off, "With that loser! Tell her to go, you are not hanging out with her and ruining our image, you got this." An audible sigh was heard on the other side, "and after all that I did for you too. You're going to pay for this."

"What?" I was getting a little scared.

"Go on tell her, I want to hear you tell her you are not going," yes I was very scared. And fear is one of those things that motivate humans.

"Alright," I walked up to Rei, "Sorry but I cannot go today," her face dropped, "I forgot that I had made other plans."

She pouted slightly but just said, "Oh okay, see you at school."

She looked back one more time before turning around and leaving, "Maybe next time," she said, still with a smile on her face.

It was twenty minutes before Sakura came.

"You FAT BITCH," she yelled at me once we were in the privacy of my room. She took one of her palms and gave a face a rough slap.

I brought my hand up to my face and touched the area which had just been attacked.

"How dare you," she said, "even think of hanging out with someone else." Her eyes were daggers.

I tried to sputter out an answer but she just said, "Whatever, let's go."

I never liked that side of Sakura, but I still thought she was being honest and I liked that.

I followed her out the door and into a black town car. "Hi Marina," Suki said, she saw the red on my cheek , "Oh what happened."

I don't know why, but I covered up for Sakura, "Oh this," I said while shaking my hand, "I just slipped on hit my jaw on my bed."

"Looked like it hurt," Suki said with concern.

"Today girls," Sakura said, "We are going to the mall."

The other girls all clapped, but I just kind of looked at her scared. They chatted about the clothes they will buy, but I just sat there in silence. I was trying to convince myself why Sakura freaked out so much. Finally, I came up with this, she likes me so much as a friend that she didn't want anyone near me. That had to be it. Snapping out of my sadness I joined into their conversation. When we got to the mall, the other girls went right away to the clothes stores. I looked around with them, and found a cute halter top that cinched at the waist. I looked really good in it, Suki and Rin both told me to get it, but Sakura said I shouldn't. I listened to her and just ended up buying a shapeless hoodie.

"Boys like it when you leave more to the imagination," she said with a smile.

The worst part is: I believed her.

God I hate writing all this depressing boring stuff…. Don't worry only one or more chapter until the host club really comes into play.

In a few more chapters our Marina will go through changes. ;)

Please Review and tell me what you think is the pace too slow?

-Sassycats