Author's Notes: Funny thing. I never intended for this to be multi chapter but it seems to be gaining quite a following, so I'll continue this for a bit. The story is more for humor than anything else. Hope you enjoy the continuation :)
If you can, please check out my other Adlock fic "Her Chemical Defect", which is a retelling of ASiB from Irene Adler's point of view.
The sitting room echoed with John Watson's heavy footsteps as he paced angrily while Sherlock Holmes and Irene Adler, now sporting identical dark blue robes, followed his every move. Sherlock was seated on the arm chair while Irene sat on the arm rest. If she was leaning against Sherlock or the other way around, John wasn't sure. Maybe it was both. But it was clear that even after being caught shagging each other senseless earlier, they didn't want to spend even a second being physically apart.
John scrunched his eyes and did his best to stop himself from gagging when he remembered what he had seen earlier. It was no use. No cleaning agent could ever rid his mind of that mental image.
John stopped pacing and glared at them. They didn't look the least bit terrified of his obvious display of anger, and it irked him even more.
"Why Sherlock?" he fumed. "Why do you keep on doing this to me?"
Sherlock's brows furrowed. "Doing what?"
"This!" John made a sweeping gesture at Irene. "Lying to me—"
"I never lied to you," Sherlock cut in. "I just omitted certain truths."
"And how long do you plan on omitting this certain truth?" John pointed at Irene again, spit flying off his lips.
"Sherlock dear," Irene smiled, putting an arm around Sherlock's shoulders. "I think we may have made Dr. Watson a tad bit jealous."
That finally blew the lid off what little control John had over his anger. "WHY IN GOD'S NAME DOES NO ONE EVER BELIEVE THAT I AM IN FACT, NOT GAY? IS IT NOT ENOUGH THAT I HAVE A WIFE AND CHILD WHOM I DEARLY LOVE?"
Sherlock raised a hand. "John, you need to calm down."
"I AM NOT GOING TO CALM DOWN!"
"I'm just having fun with you, Dr. Watson," Irene drawled. "Of course I believe you. I know gay men when I see them."
He was still angry at her of course, but as much as John hated to admit it, Irene had calmed him down a bit.
John pressed his face into his palms before running his hands to his greying ash blonde hair. He took another breath before striding to the arm chair across them and plopping down.
"So," he began tersely. "You mind enlightening me as to why Irene Adler is alive? Hm?"
"You should know John," Sherlock nodded. "You were after all the one who told me she got herself into a witness protection scheme in America."
"Oh, come off it, Sherlock!" John could feel a vein trying to break free from the skin of his neck. "I'm not stupid. You knew back then I was lying and that she was dead and yet..." John turned to Irene again, his eyes widening when realization hit him. "Bloody bastard, you knew she was captured in Pakistan."
"Karachi, if you'd like to be more specific," Sherlock corrected.
"Oh, this is just..." John shook his head, his lips curled up in a grimace. "Mycroft was right. It would take Sherlock Holmes to fool him."
Sherlock shrugged. John wanted so bad to plant a fist on that smug face of his.
John managed to fight off the impulse. "Sherlock...I'm going to repeat my question. Why is Irene Adler alive?"
"Well, if you wish me to go through the minutiae of the plan I had concocted to rescue her in Karachi, it may take the better part of the day. But since you insist—"
"I don't want to know how you did it, Sherlock," John cut in. "I want to know 'why'."
Sherlock and Irene looked at each other. John didn't have Sherlock's deductive powers, but it was clear these two still retained their ability to communicate non-verbally with each other.
John watched as Sherlock looked away, his lips in a thin line. He muttered something under his breath.
John raised an eyebrow and leaned in closer. "Pardon? What was that?"
"Sentiment, okay, sentiment! There, I admitted it," Sherlock fell back into his chair, as saying though it out loud had knocked the wind out of him.
"Sentiment?" John was flabbergasted. "You mean you...her..."
Irene spoke up before John could continue. "The sentiments between Sherlock and I are mutual, in case you're worried."
"Oh, yes, I am worried," John nodded vigorously. "You've lied to us before. You've manipulated and used him, tricked him and—"
"All in the past, Dr. Watson."
"And am I just to take your word for it?"
Again, Irene and Sherlock shared a look so intense that John felt like an intruder.
Finally, Sherlock sighed. "We are in what you would call...a monogamous arrangement."
The creases on John's forehead deepened. "Monogamous arrangement?"
"We're in a relationship, Dr. Watson." Irene smiled widely and ran her fingers through Sherlock's hair. "And we have been for quite some time."
It took a while for John Watson to realize that his mouth was hanging open.
