First chapter, woo. In which we find Deidara and Itachi have pretty much the same roles they did in Finding Tobi. Poor guys ;)

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, the Akatsuki, or the Wizard of Oz


The first thing Deidara recognised upon waking was a massive headache. Although this made him slightly more grumpy than usual, he was still pretty perky about being alive. He dragged himself to his feet and looked at his surroundings. The land was a sickeningly bright affair, but looked much better than the last time Tobi had cast a spell on them all. He tried to shake his hair out, and make himself feel better. He was however rewarded with a smack into his face from each side. The smacks were soft, and smelt vaguely like his favourite herbal essences shampoo.

He looked at what he was wearing and realised why.

A dress again! Why was it always him when it came to wearing dresses, and blue puffy out ones at that? This one was a short gingham frock, with a crisp, white, pinny over the top. But the icing on the cake was his hair. It had found its way into two long smooth pigtails either side of his head. They were fastened with poppy red ribbons. Deidara wanted to stamp his feet at this. His beautiful, artistic hair was not to be touched by hands other than his. And Sasori's if he was in the right mood. But other than that his beloved locks were off limits to all. Stupid Tobi, he just had to cast his stupid spells and ruin everyone's lives.

There was a sound coming from near his feet and Deidara looked down. He almost wet himself laughing at its source. A small black dog was yapping away angrily at him. The fur in front of its eyes looked oddly familiar.

"Itachi is that you?" the blonde giggled pointing at the dog. It stopped barking and appeared to frown at him. "Ha, and I thought I had it rough in the dress, un."

It was then the bomber noticed the odd light in the sky. It was speeding towards the pair, growing larger as it approached. There was a pinging sound and a lady appeared in front of the pair. She was clad in what seemed to be a pink meringue of chiffon and lace, plus the world's tallest crown. Itachi snorted as derisively as a small dog could at the woman. Apparently she knew how to use hairspray but lacked the skill of using a hairbrush. Deidara simply stared at her unimpressed as she waved her wand around serenely.

"Are you a good witch, or a bad witch?" the affront to fashion asked the blonde. Deidara, still un-amused at people not knowing his gender glared at her.

"I'm a terrorist actually," he responded. Itachi barked something at her. It sounded a lot like "hn." The woman appeared not to hear either of them, as she was urging hordes of miniature people toward them. Itachi trotted over to Deidara's legs and stuck close by him as they crowded closer and closer.

"You have saved the munchkins!" the woman proclaimed, "you have saved them from the wicked witch of the east,"

"Woo-hoo, un" Deidara said sarcastically. These people were clearly deranged.

Suddenly there was a massive explosive sound, and the blonde looked around excitedly. Explosions! A spot on the floor began to fill with green smoke, and a venomous looking witch was stood within the cloud.

"Which of you did it?" the newcomer screeched, "who killed my sister?" she darted over to the two akatsuki, waving her bedraggled broomstick in Deidara's face. He noticed she was gesturing towards where he had woken up. Several objects from their hideout were scattered on the ground, including the sofa, a bookcase and some potted plants belonging to Zetsu. The most bizarre thing to have travelled with them however was what the witch was pointing at.

The huge statue they stood on for sealing rituals was currently in pieces; one of the enormous hands had landed on what must have been the wicked witch of the east. When he looked closely the bomber could make out a pair of feet sticking out beneath the rubble. The living witch lunged at him again, causing Itachi to yelp in surprise. Upset at his famous dignity being taken, the dog began to growl loudly at the witch.

"Aren't you forgetting the ruby slippers?" the fashion reject asked the witch, interrupting her tirade against the two akatsuki. The witch, looking hopeful jumped up, and ran over to her sister's corpse. The aforementioned shoes however were missing. Deidara felt his toes pinch and looked down at his feet. Great, just great. It was always him this happened to.

"Ugh, these totally do not go with this dress," the blonde proclaimed at his newest accessories.

'They do match your ribbons though' Itachi thought to himself smugly.

"How dare you? How dare you take my sister's ruby slippers?" the witch ranted, "they belong to me!"

"Ah-ah. You cannot harm the child while she is wearing the ruby slippers," sang the meringue woman.

"I'm a guy, not a girl," Deidara muttered in annoyance. Sometimes he didn't know why he bothered. He missed the witch cackling and climbing onto a broomstick, before flying off in anger.

"I'll get you, and your little dog too!" came the cackles from the sky. The inhabitants of the land came out from their hiding places once more to crowd around the akatsuki began chattering and singing at him continuously, before the blonde decided he was fed up of the behaviour and pushed them all away.

"Hey lady," he interrupted the woman, "where the hall am I, un? And who are you for that matter?"

"Why, my child, you are in munchkinland!" the woman beamed back at him far too cheerily. "I am Glinda, the good witch of the north, and these are the munchkins. We are so grateful to you for freeing them from the witch,"

"Yeah, whatever, un" Deidara waved his hand dismissively. "so how do I get out of here and back home then?"

"Why, you must go see the wizard of course!" announced the good witch. "you'll get there if you just follow the yellow brick road."

Deidara and Itachi, fully aware they were already stood upon a yellow brick road made a run for it. Now they had some idea of where to head for they were definitely not sticking around with these weirdo's. Behind them they could hear the singing voices of the munchkins.

"follow the yellow brick road!
Follow the yellow brick road!"

Deidara bent over to scoop up Itachi's small and furry form, his heels clattering on the stony road.

"I think I still have some clay on me, would you be opposed to me blowing the shit outta them, un?" he asked the dog. He was replied with a small woof.

He assumed that meant yes.