~Announcement~

Hey guys! It's me, again. So...I'm really happy! SO HAPPY THAT I...um, Okay, right now I have NOTHING to announce. :P Anyways, I noticed that I wrote my friend too OOC. :P I'm sorry about that! Not like you guys know, anyways...ANYWHO! REPLY DOWN IN THE COMMENTS IF YOU WANT AND Q&A OR A TRUTH OR DARE CHAPTER! LET ME KNOW! So, yeah. That's about it.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own FMA. I used caps lock for "not" for emphasis. :P

Warning: Profanity and some mature themes suggested. Also, maybe some REALLY TRAMATIZING POP-CULTURE REFERENCES BLINDED MY FRIENDS WHEN I SHOWED THEM THIS. Actually, I think it's my foul mouth that did that...

~-!-~

"What?! Is that even possible? Are you sure you don't have amnesia?!" I nodded, and plopped two more slices in my mouth. Geez, this is more stressful than what the fanfics I read. It's hurting my head!

"I don't have amnesia. If I did, why would I know your rank, Colonel Pervert?" Jaquelin still kept her poker face, sipping her milk. Havoc stifled a laugh, I think Riza cocked another gun. I bet you Mustang stole all of the ladies in Amestris AND urk marks.

"Aren't you a polite one? Lemme ask your friend. Maybe she'll respond in a more...NORMAL way. Jaquelin, is your friend here correct?" She glared at him, most likely still afraid. My friend nodded, and gulped down her milk.

"Yep. Meicee here knows everything about this world because she's obsessed with watching ani-" I reached over the table to cover her mouth, then smiled sheepishily.

"Hehe...Nothing," I glared at her," I'll explain that later! Hehe..." Jaquelin put her hand on the hand I covered her mouth with, glaring at me. I whispered a soft "sorry" and let go. I sat back down in my seat, scooting in more. The soldiers didn't look impressed, since I'm just a MASTER at covering things up. Oh fuck me. Oh fuck me and my anime wishes.

"Uh huh. We have to watch you two, in case if you do anything fishy. I'll assign a bodyguard for each of you. And if you try ANYTHING, you'll be executed." Jaquelin widened, and Mustang smirked. I grinned, and gave a thumbs up.

"Sure! Besides, the more, the merrier! Hehe! I'll say that the most dangerous thing that I did was cuss in public!" I laughed, and stood up. I pushed my chair in and told Jaquelin to come with me to the restroom. She stood up, and followed me. After taking a few twists and turns, we FINALLY found it. I waited for her outside the stall. When she was washing her hands, I mentioned something important.

"You have to follow my orders, got it? Whether you like it or not. These rules are to protect ourselves since this world is more dangerous that eating a moldy cheeseburger. Got that?" She rolled her eyes at me, and sighed. She turned off the faucet, and dried off her hands.

"Meicee, I swear, you are crazy. I always knew were crazy, but now I think you should belong with REAL crazy people." She opened the door, leaving me to run to catch up. I saw many weird looks soldiers and alchemists were giving us. I finally caught up with her when she looked like she was lost. Oh shitty poop.

"Hey! Jaquelin! Listen to me!" I dragged her to a hallway with not a lot of guards, not letting go of her hand.

"Look, I know this sounds crazy, but you HAVE TO do whatever I tell you to do. I know more about this world than you do, so PLEASE just trust me on this one, I'm BEGGING YOU. I don't, pardon my language, WANT TO SEE YOU FUCKING DIE, KNOWING THAT IT'S MY FAULT. So PLEASE, just...listen..." I was almost crying at the thought of her dying, but fortunately I held back my tears, saving them for later. I sniffled a few times, and then tried to regain my smile. She sighed, walking to the left hallway.

"Ugh, fine, but ONLY because of our current situation. So what's the plan?" I shrugged and caught up with her, finally regaining my smile.

"There's no current plan, but I'm following every fanfic plot. Meet the Elric bros, travel with them, and yeah. That's about it. But, I DO KNOW that Nick's in Rush Valley, no matter what. This is EXACTLY like the dream I had, but it stopped after a third person POV, showing Nick there."

"What's a POV?" Why couldn't I be stuck with Marise instead?!

"Fanfic term. Short for point of view. Well, now that my parents aren't here, I can curse whenever, and however I fucking what! Ahem. Sorry. Anyways, follow these EXACT RULES, no EXCEPTIONS, okay?"

"Okay. I'm listening."

"1. Train you mind, train your body. It means if you want to become smart, you have to train you body, or learn how to fight. You don't want to become an annoying as hell can't defend herself Mary-Sue, don't ya?"

"Huh?"

"I'll explain the Mary-Sue part later. Anyways, 2. Don't die. If you die here, only God knows that if you died in our world or not. Basically, avoid death. 3. DON'T GO AND STEAL MY MAN! OKAY?! He's MINE! Actually, I'm kidding. Who can force one doing something that they don't like? Haha! 3. is actually have fun! Let loose! No parents, no school, only our future! How great is that?!" She rolled her eyes, then tugging on my sleeve.

"What?"

"We're lost."

"No shit, Sherlock. Come on, I think I know the way back." I grabbed her arm, and after God knows how long, we found the doors to the office, but this time it was closed. I opened the door, finding a certain boy with a braid and a giant suit of armor, talking, no, shouting, at Mustang. Mustang eyed us, and made eye contact, like he wants us to come in. I grabbed Jaquelin, and we stood next to the door.

"-Loire was a dead end! This is our 500th fail! Are you even listening?!" Ed fumed. Awww, isn't he s-NO! CONTROL YOURSELF!

"Shut up, pipsqueek. Lemme introduce you to these two Xingese girls that claim that they are from the other side of the gate. If they're not kidding, they might just have a lead for you two." He smirked, and as the Elrics turned around, I blushed. A LOT. Ed's even HOTTER IN PERSON! EEE! Calm down, calm down. I have no chance with him. Besides, he belongs to Winry and vice versa.

"Hey! Um, Colonel Miniskirt, you said you were going to assign bodyguards for us? You know, in case if we do something...fishy!" I grinned and Jaquelin made room for a small smile, waving as she did.

"Oh yes! These two are your bodyguards!" Mustang, did you not plan this out?

"WHAT?!"

"HUH?!"

"..."

"What?!" Ed looked like he was about to burst, and Al, just tried to do the most reasonable thing: calm him down.

"NO WAY IN HELL! WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR BABY-SITTING!" I grinned even more, and walked closer to him.

"Oh really? Do you realize you just met a person that's s-s-taboo word than you? Hmm? Also, we, sorry, I, have lots of information for you!~" I skipped around the room, humming a familiar tune.

"She's...shorter than me? YES! FINALLY! SOMEONE THAT I CAN RELATE TO!" He began fist-pumping the air, and his ego grew bigger and bigger.

"Hey, don't you want proof that we're from the other side of the Gate?" Ed stopped whatever the hell he's doing, and listened.

"Yes."

"Okay! How about the time your mom, Trisha, served both of you guys milk for the first time and you tried to force-feed it to Al and what ended up happening was that you dumped your glass of milk over his head? Also, I already knew your names, even more proof! Tee hee!"

"Are you sure that your just not some fortuneteller?" I smirked. What, just because I lie a lot doesn't mean I won't tell the truth in these kinds of situations.

"Pfft, you've got to be KIDDING me, right?! Listen to our story, no interruptions. Questions at the end. Jaquelin's not speaking because I know the FULL story, but you can bond with her. Okay, even shutting up now? Okay. Good. So Cigarettes, Guns, Colonel Pervert, and Harry Potter, sit down. That includes you, Armor Boy and Mr. I Have a Big Ego!" You know which one were about to burst, but I reminded them, no talking until the end or ELSE. I gave them my creepy fangirl smile, then cleared my throat and smiled sweetly, as if like nothing happened. I bet that they got chills...

"Okay. Let's begin. First off, these are what we wear to sleep. I know, I know, weird-looking clown suits. But hey! They're comfortable! Anyways, back to our story. Gee, where to begin...the dream? Our life stories? Our world? Hmm...HEY! YOU! NO WALKING AWAY! I'LL TACKLE YOU!" Havoc stopped in his steps, sweatdropping with the others.

"I was going to use the men's room. And then take a smoke break." I glared at him. Wow. By the time he reaches 40, he's gonna die of freaking lung cancer cause he smokes a pack an hour.

"Uh huh. Fine. Men's room, I give you a minute. Smoke break? You've gotta be fucking kidding me. You're gonna die because of those smokes. Cut back to a pack a week." I waved my hand around, and he stared real hard at me.

"You're just a lit-" I quickly kicked him in the balls. Wrong move, Havoc. Wrong move. I punched him in the gut, then when he fell, I grabbed his smoke pack, then returned to my seat, after I threw his smoke pack out the window, of course. Jaquelin was about to give me a lecture, and the others probably thought I had bad manners. The Elrics? I probably reminded them of Izumi.

"NOO! MY SMOKES! Owww...My gut..." Since I'm not a ruthless person, I helped him up, and whispered in his ear "Don't. Call. Me. LITTLE." He gulped and understood. Good. Havoc ran out the door, most likely to grab his smokes. I dusted off my hands, and grinned at them.

"And that's why you NEVER call me small! Also, don't smoke, kids! It can kill you faster then the Colonel's useless flames!" I sat back down, receiving laughs from Crazy Cat Boy, Antenna Boy, and a stunt-double for Harry Potter.

"WHY YOU-" Too bad. Riza has you on a leash. She can pull it as hard as she wants to. Yep. She pulled it.

"Thanks, Hawkeye. Anyways, back to our story! So I basically dreamt that this happened and the last thing I saw of my dream was my friend in Rush Valley. I was hoping to find him, regroup our gang, and find a way to get back home. So...I know you'll say no, but we, I mean, I have a lead on the Philosopher's Stone if you want. Jaquelin's here to tag along. And be the mom of the group." I smirked at my answer, and I think Ed gave in, which is SUPER OOC, if you ask me.

"Fine. But only for the lead, nothing else. We'll find your friend along the way too. Remember, if you get in trouble, I swear-"

"That you'll never save us again. Got it. I know a particular teacher we can go to that's along the way. She can help us with combat." I smirked and the brothers got the message. Jaquelin still looked clueless, but she knew it was bad news. We were going to train with Izumi Curtis.

~Author's Note~
Cliffhanger! I know, I know. THE CHARACTERS ARE TOO OOC! I KNOW THAT! I'm sorry, this is really really bad. Next chapter we'll continue with questions, but yeah. Most of the actions were the same, and I want the readers to imagine their expressions in that situation instead of reading it, so I don't put details. I know, sounds SUPER cheesy. :P Anyways, have a WONDERFUL day! This is BlackMidnightWhite, signing out. BYE!~