Please? Did he just hear his dad correctly? John Winchester had just asked Sam somethin instead of demanding it?
Sam felt as if within those brief moments of a phone call his world was about to crumble to pieces. What the hell had happened to Dean and how bad must it be if his dad is begging him, using please instead of COME NOW!
Never in his life had Sam heard his dad "ask" him something instead of demanding it, and now his dad was asking him, no, pleading with him.
Sam quickly picked up the phone and called to book the first flight to Kansas. Lucky for him they had a flight leaving that night.
Jessica walked into the room as she heard Sam on the phone. After getting off the phone Sam told Jessica that he had to go away for a couple of days to deal with a family matter.
"Sam, you don't look too good, is everything okay?"
"I-I don't know Jess, all I know is that I have to go."
"Do you want some company?"
"No sweetie, I need to do this alone, I'll call you I promise."
"Hope everything is okay."
"Yeah…me too. I love you Jess."
"Love you too Sam."
Sam quickly grabbed his bags and hopped on a taxi and headed for the airport. Granted the plane wasn't leaving for another 5 hours, but he had to get away from the apartment. He didn't want to worry Jess anymore than she was, and right now his mind was running everywhere. The fear and guilt were so intense, all Sam could think about was the way John had sounded on the phone.
A couple hours later in Kansas
While on the plane Sam had realized that he hadn't even asked his dad where he and Dean were, but from the tone in his dad's voice he figured that a hospital would be a good start. Sam knew that he could've called to make sure they were at the hospital, but he was too scared, too scared to hear his dad's shaky voice again.
Sam got on another taxi and headed to the hospital closest to their house. Sam was so distracted that he even forgot to pay the taxi drive, it wasn't until he heard the driver yell a loud, "MY MONEY KID", that Sam snapped back and apologized immediately.
Sam ran as quickly as he could to the front counter.
"Hi, can I help you?" asked the nurse behind the counter
"I-I'm looking for my brother, I think he was admitted hear."
"What's his name?"
"Uhh…" Sam wasn't sure what name to give since he knew his dad must be paying for the medical bill with a fake credit card, he figured their last name would be different.
Just then Sam saw his father speaking outside to a doctor, and without even so much as a "never mind I found my dad" to the nurse at the front desk, Sam ran to where his father was.
Sam heard his father thank the doctor and then fall back on a chair with his head between his hands.
"D-dad"
John's head shot up so fast that Sam thought his dad would get a whip lash.
"Sammy, you came."
"Of course I came dad, where's Dean?"
John pointed to the room right behind him, but before Sam went in John placed a soft hand on Sam's chest as if the slow him down.
"Sammy"
"What dad?"
"Just uh…" John couldn't help but look at the ground. "Just be prepared for what you're gon'a see, Dean…he's uh…he's pretty banged up son, and he's got a lot of machines attached to him."
Sam eyes widened at what he was hearing, but he simply just nodded and entered the room.
Sam froze the minute he entered the room, he felt as if he couldn't breathe as a sudden wave of nausea hit him.
There in front of him lay his older brother, hooked on numerous machines and more wires than he could count at the moment. As Sam moved closer he got a better look at the damage done to Dean. Dean's face was blue and purple and a little swollen, and his chest was covered in bandages.
Sam felt the tears welling up in his eyes just as his father walked in.
"Dad…what happened?"
"Your brother saved my life, that's what happened," John paused and looked at the ground. At that moment Sam could've sworn he saw guilt on his dad's face.
"I thought I found the trail to the demon that took your mother, so I went after it. I didn't tell Dean where I was going cuz I didn't want him to follow me, I didn't want him to get hurt," John was now starring at his eldest. "So much for that huh."
"Dad…," Sam wanted to tell his father that it wasn't his fault, but he just couldn't. A part of him did blame his dad whenever Dean got hurt on hunts because they would've never hunted in the first place if their dad hadn't introduced them to that life. But in this particular instance he blamed himself more than he blamed his father.
Right then Sam realized something; Dean was right all along, his dad was going after the demon, and Sam had sent Dean to rescue their father on his own. Sam also realized that Dean hadn't told his father how he had come to get Sam at Stanford and how Sam had shut the door in his face. Dean hadn't told his father how Sam had refused to have his back after he had had Sam's back his entire life. How was he going to tell his father, how was he going to tell him that it was his fault that Dean was in the hospital. Just as he was about to confess, his father continued with the story.
"When I got to the warehouse where I thought the demon was, I got a little tied up, literally. It turned out that the demon in the warehouse wasn't the one who killed your mother, but instead was that demon's child. Anyways the demon got the upper hand on me and before I knew it I had blacked out and woke up tied to the wall. The demon just kept wailing away at me when your brother burst through the door guns blazing."
Sam couldn't help but let out a little laugh, "guns blazing"; those two words were the perfect description of the hunter in his brother. John smiled as he shared in Sam's silent analogy, but the smile quickly faded off his face as he began to describe what happened next.
"Dean got away a couple shots at the demon, but all it did was push the demon off of me and straight to him." John swallowed hard before continuing, Sam could clearly see how painful it was for John to relive what happened.
"It uh…it threw Dean against the wall…a couple of times and just began to wail away at him. Dean fought it off a couple times but it was too powerful and with each blow Dean just got weaker and weaker."
Sam didn't realize how fast his heart was beating now. Just the thought of his brother being weak, was so foreign to him, his brother was always the strong one, the hero. As hard as it was for John to describe what happened to Dean, it was ten times harder for Sam to hear it. Sam almost didn't want his dad to continue, but the silent admission was just that, silent.
"I tried to get free to help him…but I couldn't…and then," John paused as he looked at the ground with a defeated expression laced across his face.
"And then what dad?" Sam asked horrified as he saw John's pale expression, he knew this was going to be bad.
"The demon…it…it did something. It closed its eyes and opened it just starring Dean down…and that's when I heard…when I heard your brother screaming. There was blood coming out of his chest and his mouth…it was like the demon was ripping him apart from the inside out."
Sam's face instantly turned white as a ghost and he looked at his brother with tears welling in his eyes. How could he have let this happen? He could've stopped this or at least given Dean a fighting chance.
"How...how did you…how did you escape?" Sam asked barely able to get the words out.
"We didn't." John dropped his head down. "The demon, when it was done with your brother, it just left, it said it be back later with its father and that…and that killing us like that was too easy…not enough of a challenge."
"Oh," Sam replied. That was all Sam could even think of saying.
John sat there with his fist against his lips. "That son of a bitch…HOW DARE HE DO THIS TO DEAN," John's anger was clearly evident now but soon turned to a look of pain and defeat. "How could I let him do this to Dean…"
"Dad, you couldn't stop him, not by yourself." Not by yourself, but if I was there maybe we could've stopped him. Sam's guilt was so close to consuming him, he could just feel it, this was his fault, that he knew for sure.
"Dad…can I talk to Dean…alone?"
"Sure Sammy, I'll go grab us some food"
"Thanks dad"
"No problem kiddo"
As John was walking out of the room he turned back to see his two boys together again.
"Sammy, thanks for coming, I know it means a lot to your brother, even if he's not conscious, I know he knows that you're here. You two have always had that amazing connection, even when you were kids." Sam nodded as John smiled and left the room.
Sam sat there watching his brother, and without even realizing it he curled his fingers around Dean's hand.
"Oh god Dean…I'm so sorry…I'm so sorry Dean…please just wake up so you can tell me what an ass I am…please just wake up…"
Sam was starring at Dean, waiting for a sign, anything that would let him know that Dean was going to be okay, a wiggle of a finger, a twitch of the eye…anything. But nothing came and Sam felt his heart break as it had done many times since he heard his dad's voice over the phone.
"Dean, you have to fight, please…for me Dean…please. I can't lose you, I know all the horrible things I said to you, but I didn't mean them Dean, I was just angry and confused…I swear I didn't mean them. Dean…you mean more to me than anything in this world…I love you big brother…please just come back…I'll do anything you want if you just wake up."
Sam could no longer hold the tears back as they flowed down his cheeks like rivers. He realized then how Dean truly was the most important person in his life. He loved his dad, but Dean was the one who practically raised him. Dean wasn't just his older brother; he was his hero, his role model, his best friend. As for the other main person in Sam's life, Jessica, he loved Jessica, he was sure of that, but she would never take his brother's place. As much as he hated to admit it, the pain of breaking up with Jessica and never seeing her again would be magnified ten fold if he were to lose Dean.
As the tears flowed freely from Sam's eyes, he felt a strong hand grip his shoulder. He didn't have to turn back to realize who the sturdy hand belonged to.
"Dad…Dean's gon'a be okay right?" Sam needed reassurance, anything to keep him from thinking the worst.
"I…I dun'no Sammy"
"No, he's gon'a be okay, he's the strongest person I know…he'll fight this…he just has to!" Sam replied as his voice was filled with a mix of determination, fear, hope, and worry.
"He will Sammy, he'll fight with everything he has."
Sam nodded agreeing.
John and Sam sat there, both watching Dean as if he was about to disappear. Then Sam noticed his dad watching him, and he looked up to meet his dad's gaze.
"Sammy, the way we ended things before you left, I'm a…" John was stumbling for that 5 letter word he rarely ever used, and lucky for him Sam interrupted.
"I'm sorry too dad, I never meant for it to get so out of hand."
"Sam, I was proud of you…we were both proud of you," he said as he looked at Dean. "I was jus' scared Sammy; you were going off to college alone without any backup. Even when I wasn't home I knew Dean was there to protect you so I knew nothing bad would happen to you. But when you left for school…I was jus' scared Sam…always proud of you, jus' scared."
Sam was left speechless, he always figured his father hadn't been proud and the only reason he didn't want Sam to go to Stanford was because he wanted Sam to hunt.
"I-I dun'no what to say…you were proud of me?"
"Of course I was Sammy, always have been, always will be!"
Always will be… "You wouldn't be if you knew what happened when Dean came to get me at Stanford," Sam thought to himself.
"I was glad you followed your dream Sammy, that's all I ever wanted for you and Dean, I just didn't think you guys would be safe until we defeated this Demon," John said, hoping for a little bit of understand from his youngest.
"But you seem to be doing okay at Stanford," John continued. "I only wish now that I had made Dean follow his dream instead of letting him sacrifice it so that you could follow yours. You both should have been able to follow your dreams; he shouldn't have had to give his up to keep our family together."
Sam was shocked by his dad's confession.
"What? Dad…what are you talking about? What dream did Dean sacrifice for me?"
John swallowed hard after hearing his son's question, realizing what he had just done. How could he let that slip, he had promised Dean that he would never let Sam know of the sacrifice he had made for him. Dean knew that it would guilt Sam into maybe even giving up his dream, and that's not what he wanted.
"DAD! What did Dean Do?"
TBC- Next chapter will be up tomorrow
