.

Somewhere I Belong

And I know
I may end up failing too.
But I know
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you.

.Chapter 2: Numb.


Stay with us, hon.

What? Who was that? Autumn searched her memory for someone with that voice, but she couldn't remember anyone who sounded like that. She heard something that sounded like chopper blades, but she couldn't open her eyes to see if there was one around. She tried to stay awake – to stay with them, like they asked – but she couldn't find the strength. Her body hurt, and she was so tired. The darkness was so comforting, and so peaceful. It welcomed her with promises of no pain, and contentment.

Blood pressure isn't stable… Heart rate is dropping rapidly… We're losing her…

Autumn heard what the voice was saying, but she couldn't comprehend. The words were just words. Her mind wasn't piecing them together. They didn't mean anything to her. In her mind, she was home. It was different, though. There was no high fencing. There was no stench of Borax filling her nose. There was a dreamlike quality wherever she looked – like the edges of her vision were fuzzy. She tried focusing, and eventually things came into focus for her. She was standing in her living room, with pictures of her family cluttering the walls, and the faint smell of a dog lingering in the house. It was comforting, and it looked like her home, but it was foreign to her.

She walked to the mantle and lifted a picture frame. "What is going on?" she asked.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" someone asked behind her.

She turned around quickly, but was unable to answer when she saw who was behind her. The person looked so familiar – with brown eyes, brown hair, and a sweet round face – but she had never been this old in Autumn's memories before.

"Sage?" she asked, finally able to speak again.

"That'd be me," she replied with a smile.

"But… how?" Autumn asked.

Sage took Autumn's hand and led her to the couch. She sat down, and gave Autumn a look that their mother had given them many times. It was a look that said time for some real talk. "This is the future that we could have had. This is the future we can still have, if you succeed," Sage explained.

"So you were never taken by the leviathans?" Autumn asked.

Sage shook her head. "Nope, not in this future. I only know about the other outcome because Cas gave me the memory," she said.

"I don't understand. I'm trying to make things better," Autumn said.

Sage nodded. "I know, but you're hurt right now. If you don't fight for it, you'll lose, and the future will still be lost," she said.

"What am I supposed to do?" Autumn whispered.

Sage pulled her into a hug and said; "Wake up, and make this better the way only you know how."


Waking up in the hospital was never a good sign, but it was better than not waking up at all. She was alone in her hospital room, so she went to find a familiar face. She needed to find her dad, uncle Dean, or even her grandfather John. Her grandfather was definitely not what she had expected, and he still didn't fully trust her, but he seemed to be getting there. He trusted her enough to not kill her, at least, so that's something.

She tested her muscles, moving the major ones to make sure she could walk properly. She wasn't in pain, which was odd to say the least. There was a dull ache in her head and her mouth was pretty dry, but it was nothing a glass of water and some ibuprofen wouldn't fix. She stretched her muscles before standing up and walking to the hallway.

It was empty except for a nurse pushing a cart with medicine on it. She walked to the nurse and smiled politely before saying: "Excuse me."

The nurse must've not heard her, because she walked past her and into the hospital room. She noticed that her dad was the person lying on the hospital bed, so at least she found him. She walked in behind the nurse, and tried to get their attention.

"Is he going to be okay?" Autumn asked.

Her dad was beginning to wake up, so the nurse waited patiently, gathering the medicine he needed. She didn't even seem to hear her, even though Autumn hadn't mumbled. Was this nurse deaf? The nurse gave him the medicine, and he tried to stand. He looked sore and banged up, but other than that, he would heal quickly. Neither one of them seemed to be paying any attention to her.

"How's my dad and brother?" he asked.

"Your father's recovering, but it's nothing too critical," she said.

Sam realized what she was doing, and he said; "What about Dean?"

"Your brother and sister aren't doing as well," she said.

So that was going to be their story. Well, that meant she'd get to use the name Winchester, at least. The nurse explained that Dean hadn't woken yet, and neither had she, but she was standing right next to them. She rushed back to her room and saw her body lying on the bed. There were tubes and wires hooked to her, and she looked even more pale than usual. She must've lost a good amount of blood. This couldn't be happening. There had to be someone here who could see her.

She left the room and began roaming the halls, trying to get anyone's attention, but it wasn't working. She walked to her uncle's room and waited. He was hooked up to tubes, much like she was. She wasn't going to give up, but she needed to think. Before she could come up with a plan, someone else entered the room. She turned to see Dean – dressed in a similar fashion – entering the room. They both froze and looked at each other, before he asked if she could see him.

"Yes, I can see you," she said.

"What the hell?" he muttered.

She shook her head and said; "So this is what happens when you're in a coma?"

"I guess so," Dean said. "We're going to find a way to fix this."

"I was thinking the same thing," she replied.

She didn't tell him that she already had a plan in mind. There was only one person she could contact, and she would have to do it the old fashioned way, since she couldn't get her hands on summoning tools. Angels weren't walking the Earth yet – most of them probably didn't even have their meat suits – but she knew that there was one who did. She could only hope that he would listen and have mercy on her.


It's a funny thing, being invisible. As a hunter you try to master the art of it, and it takes years. You try to blend in with civilians, and you try to live as normally as you possibly can. Your job is to save people, but you have to do it while not raising suspicion. Autumn had spent her entire life learning to be invisible, and now that she was, she would give anything to have someone else see her. If she were a betting woman, she would bet that Dean felt the exact same way.

It was strange just sitting at a chair, in silence, watching her grandfather. Dean had tried to get his attention several times, but nothing worked. She had tried picking things up to throw across the room, but her hand went right through them. She was currently staring at a pencil, willing it to move, and killing time before she needed to put her plan into motion.

Autumn tried to wait as long as possible before putting her plan into motion. She kept hoping – foolishly – that Sam or John would find a way out of this. They couldn't see her, and they couldn't see Dean, but she knew that Sam had to feel something. What kind of psychic can't feel when a spirit is in the room? They were currently waiting for her dad to return to the hospital, after going to help Bobby tow the Impala. Sam came back carrying a duffel bag, and his expression was furious. Autumn had seen that expression many times, and she hated when it was aimed at her.

Sam stood in front of the window, with his jaw set in anger, trying to reign in his fury.

"You're quiet," John said.

Sam turned and tossed the duffel onto the hospital bed. "Did you really think I wouldn't find out?" he asked.

"What are you talking about?" John asked.

"That stuff from Bobby – you don't use it to ward off a demon, you use it to summon one! You're planning on bringing the damn thing here, aren't you? You wanna have a big, macho showdown!" Sam accused.

The argument continued as Dean and Autumn watched, helplessly. She had never fought like this with her parents – she had always done what they had said. "Do they always fight like this?" she asked Dean.

He nodded, sullenly, and said; "Guys, don't do this."

They didn't hear him. They just kept arguing, and getting louder and louder. They weren't even trying to have a discussion – they were just trying to hurt each other with their words. They were both angry, and they needed to let off steam. Dean was getting more and more angry, because they couldn't hear him. Finally, he snapped.

"I said stop!" he shouted, and swung at a cup of water on the tray. It shattered on the ground, and the fighting between father and son stopped. "Dude, I full on Sawyze-d that mother…"

"Whoa…" Autumn said. "How did you do that?"

Dean didn't answer. He got an expression of pain on his face, and crumpled to the ground. "Dean?" Autumn asked. "Uncle Dean, are you okay?"

He shook his head. "I don't know…" he said.

He left after Sam, and ran towards the commotion in the hallway. John looked at the door with a worried expression. There could be no more stalling – she had to contact the angel, and she had to do it now. This was the only way she would be able to help herself, because she knew John wouldn't help her. He would help Dean before helping anyone else. She went back to her own room, and sat cross-legged in the floor, at the end of her bed.

She closed her eyes, and prayed.


She had been at this for what felt like hours. She had never prayed so hard in her life, and she knew that if Gabriel could hear her, he was definitely ignoring her. She finally opened her eyes and sighed in frustration. He was ignoring her, her own father couldn't hear her, Dean was busy hunting some freaky spirit thing, and she could really use a hug right now.

She stood when she heard someone enter the room. It wasn't Dean, like she had expected. Instead, and to her surprise, it was her grandfather. John was wearing his normal clothes again, and he looked like he was going to leave the hospital. He walked to the hospital bed and stood next to it, running a hand down his face. He let out a weary sigh, and let his hand rest on the railing of the bed. Autumn stood on the opposite side, and stared at him.

"I don't know if you can even hear me, but Sam seems to think Dean is roaming around, so maybe you are too," he said.

"I wish you could hear me," she muttered.

John cleared his throat and said; "You sure look an awful lot like Sam did when he was your age. I'll tell ya, I thought you were crazy when I first met you. But now, I think I definitely believe you're his daughter."

"Took you long enough," she deadpanned.

He scoffed and said; "I would've liked to have gotten to know you more. But, I'll give you this anyway." He pulled a necklace out of his pocket. It was beautiful – an old locket of some sort. "It was your grandmother's. You're a lot like her, y'know? You have her eyes. You're spunky, like she was, and you're brave. She would have loved you… more than you know."

He put the locket into her hand, and closed her fingers around it. She watched in shock – he willingly gave up something of Mary's. "Why does this seem like you're saying goodbye?" she asked, as if she could hear him.

"I wish I could save you and Dean, but I know that this doesn't work that way. I'm sorry… I really am," he said.

No… no. She had to warn someone. John couldn't do this; it would set everything in motion. She had to stop him, but how. Suddenly, she had the feeling that she wasn't alone anymore. When she turned to look behind her, she saw a man leaning against the wall. The smirk on his face was infuriating.

"Well, that was a beautiful speech," he said.

"Who are you?" she asked.

He walked toward her and said; "I'm the one you called for."


Gabriel had circled her like a predator circling its prey, but his eyes weren't hostile. Instead, they were slightly confused, yet playful. He knew she wasn't a threat – not to an archangel. He stopped in front of her, glancing between the girl lying in the bed and the spirit standing in front of him.

"You're Gabriel?" she asked.

He nodded. "Yes, I suppose I am. Although, nobody has known that for a very long time. I'm curious… how do you know who I am?"

"I…"

"Don't tell me," he said, cutting her off. "You're not from this time. I can tell. So, you've dealt with me in the future, then."

"Not personally, no. But, I have heard stories," she replied.

Gabriel continued to study her, and said; "In these stories, have I just willingly handed out favors to people?"

"No, you haven't. But I haven't come empty handed."

"Really?" he asked. "Do explain."

"There's a war coming, Gabriel, but I'm sure you knew that. I know you're hiding from your brothers, and I know how quickly they'll smite your ass if you go against them. I also know what happens to you in the future, so I am offering something to help if things go south for you," she said.

He rolled his eyes. "I'm the trickster! What could happen?"

"Nothing good, that's for damn sure."

He paused, and looked in her eyes. He saw how serious she was. "Enough beating around the bush. What are you offering?" he asked.

"A free ride," she replied. "I'll give you my consent if you help me out."

She knew she was a vessel – it was in her blood. In the future, he had told her himself that she was a vessel. Besides, if she stopped the first seal breaking, there would be no reason for him to use her as a vessel. It was a guilt free offer on her part, and it got her what she wanted. She saw the wheels turning in his mind, and he knew it was an offer he couldn't pass up. Willing vessels didn't come along every day, especially for an archangel, who needed a specific bloodline.

Gabriel sighed. "Okay, okay. They obviously sent you back for a reason. My brother's signature is covering your ribs. I'll help you out – but only you. I can't help anyone else. I can't give off that kind of signal to the guys upstairs," he explained.

"I understand," she said.

"Also, I can't have you remembering this. I'm sorry, but I just can't risk it, so you'll be forgetting everything," he said.

"But how will I remember my promise?" she asked.

He smirked and said; "Don't worry… I'll leave that part in."

He walked to her and put his fingers on her forehead, and in a flash, she was gone.


She had been unable to save her grandfather. She had gone to the basement of the hospital – the only place he would have been able to do the summoning on such short notice – but the ritual had already been done. She had seen the entire thing. She watched her grandfather sign away his life, and his soul, for years of never-ending torture. After the demon smoked out, she made her presence known. He made her promise not to tell Dean, and she eventually agreed.

He was happy to see that she was wearing the necklace he had given her – the one that had belonged to her grandmother – and she replied that she was proud to have it. They both went back to Dean's hospital room, and he was already awake. His prognosis was good, and he was definitely going to make it.

She stood in the doorway with her grandfather as he knocked on the door. "How you feeling, dude?" he asked.

"Fine, I guess. I'm alive," Dean replied.

John nodded and said; "That's what matters."

Autumn couldn't say anything. She was too busy frowning at the floor, and holding back her tears. She couldn't believe that she hadn't been able to stop a damn thing from happening. It wouldn't have mattered, though. She wouldn't have been able to get a word in edgewise with Sam's questioning.

"Where were you last night?" he asked.

"I had some things to take care of," John replied.

"Well, that's specific."

Dean rolled his eyes. "Come on, Sam," he said.

"And what about you?" Sam asked, looking at Autumn.

She raised an eyebrow. "What about me?"

"Your disappearing act after your miraculous recovery," he said. "What was that about?"

"Sam," Dean warned.

Sam was still ignoring him – he was on a roll. "Did you go after the demon?" he asked, though his question was aimed more at his father.

"No," John said.

"Why don't I believe you right now?"

John shook his head and stifled his anger. Instead, his tone was pleading as he said; "Can we not fight? You know, half the time we're fighting, I don't know what we're fighting about. We're just… butting heads. Sammy, I-I've made some mistakes, but I've always done the best I could. I just don't want to fight anymore, okay?"

There was a heavy silence hanging over the room after John's speech. "Dad, are you alright?" Sam asked.

"Yeah… I'm just a little tired," he said.

"Why don't we go get him some coffee," Autumn said softly. Sam seemed to notice her sad tone, and nodded his head.

"Yeah, okay," he said.

That would be the last words the two men traded with each other. After months of searching for their father, and days of worrying about Dean's health, it all finally culminated into this moment. It was a moment she was unable to stop, no matter how much she tried. She just couldn't stop it in time, and now it was all unfolding. Sam found his father's body at 10:30am, lying cold in the floor of an empty hospital room. By 10:41, he and his brother had officially lost both of their parents, and that night they set up the funeral pyre for the man who had lost everything.

He had been a veteran, a marine, and he had been good at it. He went from marine to father, and he loved that job just as much. He had lost his wife in the worst way imaginable, and was thrown into a life that focused on revenge. In the end, he never got the satisfaction of that revenge. In the end, John Winchester had died unable to avenge his wife. The demon that killed her had killed him too. He had died a hunter's death, and the girl who was meant to stop it never got the chance.

She had failed, and she would never forget that as long as she lived.


A/N: I hope you enjoyed this chapter. It took me forever to get it how I wanted, and it still isn't long enough to suit my needs. Oh well. I'm going to begin working on the next one soon, so I hope you'll enjoy that. Also, I'll be introducing another character in the next chapter, so be on the lookout. I hope you'll like her. :)

Reviews make me happy! :D

Updated: 5/25/2014 at 2:12AM