Today on The Real Smash Bros., Pikachu and Samus have a conversation on whether mammals are superior to other vertebrate classes.

Samus went into the kitchen to get a can of Coca-Cola Zero. This kind of soda pop tasted like regular Coca-Cola, but had no sugar, calories and low sodium. She went to a table to drink it. Coke Zero had become her favorite beverage. It has been used to promote some of her favorite movies.

Samus had been binge-watching Game of Thrones the past several days. The only thing she questioned about the show was its constant exposure of private parts, both male and female. Other than that she enjoyed the show.

Pikachu ran into the kitchen, wanting to talk to her. Something was on his mind. She could tell. "Pikachu, what brings you into the kitchen?" Pikachu began to speak, but not in the language she had been accustomed to hearing. "I've been doing some research and-" Samus interrupted him. "Pikachu, you can speak human language?" Pikachu said, "yes but you must keep it a secret. Only a selected few know I can talk. And when I do, it is with a New York Italian accent."

Samus said, "that is interesting, your secret is safe with me." Pikachu said, "not even Ash can know that I can speak. If he knew, it could very well greatly affect our relationship. By the way, those South Park Black Friday episodes suggest that Microsoft and Sony are better than Nintendo, in a way that does not even mention Nintendo, by saying they do not exist. That is a lot of baloney. Everyone knows Nintendo is better".

Samus said, "of course, everyone in this house, except Snake, says Nintendo is superior. We've all seen those episodes."

(A/N: I am a Nintendo gamer myself, but also Microsoft. While I do agree with Pikachu's views on Sony, his views on Microsoft do not reflect mine, since I also have an Xbox 360.)

Pikachu began to speak again, "as I was saying, I have been doing some research, and after careful deliberating, I have concluded that mammals, like me and you, are superior to other animals."

Samus said, "why do you say that, Pikachu?" Pikachu explained, "well, we are warm-blooded, and mammals include humans, the most intelligent of all the animals in the world. Also, female mammals, with very few exceptions, give live birth – something we don't see with fish, reptiles, birds or amphibians. So, in order witness the miracle of childbirth you have to be a mammal. I remember my mother giving birth to me. I had like 9 brothers and sisters, we were all Pichu to begin our lives."

Samus said, "not to mention mammals give us milk, from which cheese, butter, yogurt and other dairy products are made." Pikachu said, "cheese is really good, and I'm not saying that just because I am a mouse. Of course, reptiles and amphibians freeze to death more easily because they are cold-blooded."

Samus said, "of course, we do live with a few reptiles. There's Bowser, and all of Pokemon Trainer's Pokemon. I just hope they are not listening in on our conversation". Pikachu said, "I am sure they're not. I'm sure they know mammals are superior, and they respect us for it."

Pikachu handed Samus a book about animals, and Samus looked through it. Pikachu then said, "of course, with the exception of humans, mammalian Pokemon are superior to regular mammals. Like me, I can do so many things that a regular mouse cannot. Like manipulate electricity. That is how special Pokemon are."

Pikachu then added, "but the most special Pokemon out there are legendary Pokemon. They are said to have powers beyond what many other Pokemon have. That's why Legendaries are the stars of the Pokemon movies. Stories have been told about these Pokemon for generations. A number of Legendaries have statuses as Gods. Like for instance, in Kanto, Articuno is the God of Ice, Zapdos the God of Thunder – nice try Gene Simmons – and Moltres the God of Fire. But in all areas where Pokemon can be found, Arceus is the God of them all. Believe me, people who live near Pokemon are just as religious as all other countries in the world."

Samus said, "that is pretty interesting." Pikachu continued, "now, another reason mammals are superior? Many of the most popular pet choices are mammals. Cats, dogs, gerbils, mice, rats. But for every animal class that has its qualities, they have setbacks as well. Mammals are prone to having fleas. Believe me, fleas are no fun, I've had them a few times before."

Samus said, "oh I know about fleas. They're worse than Metroids. I've had lice in my hair before. Had to shave it off. It was not fun having to walk around bald for a while."

"Well this was an interesting conversation" said Pikachu. "Let's go watch some Game of Thrones with Ash and Misty."

"Sounds good to me!" said Samus.

Well it is true. Mammals rule. To be able to have hair/fur is a privilege that only mammals have. Scales are nice and all, but hair/fur is better.