# 2 y'all, and let's just say that they'll be some bashing today!
#2: Walking the path to evil
The director opens the door of his beat-up old junker and opened the door to his studio in the Nutcase Industries© recording studios super complex, where all the other strange show were made. He walked onto the set to view yet another argument by his cast.
Jack: Why the hell does that prestidigious jack-ass get to do this one, and I have to play the filthy god damn mud slinger!?
Barnette: Shut up dumbass, you don't even know what prestidigious means. And it's still
better than what I have to do.
Jack: Yeah, but you all know my motto isn't this shit.
John: And god knows you've never participated in either end of your "motto."
Director: Alright, alright, let's just get this over with so I can get paid.
The lights go out as the cameras get in place. Several beam lights focus in on a desk with an angular emblem carved into the front. Behind the desk sat Duerro in an anchorman outfit, holding a stack of papers. Behind him a sign declaring the "483 news network" shown brightly.
Duerro: Good evening ladies and gentle men. Tonight we bring you the latest on our brave troops fighting the horrible red menance. Top scientists have just made a frightening discovery in finding out ow your average citizen can fall from innocent civilian to loathsome bastard. We have created this dramatic reenactment of skits showing the path, narrated by our very own parfait.
Parfait: Thank you, first, we have the lowest and most common rung in the "ladder of evil!"
(The lights fade and open onto the lawn of the white house, where a bunch of immobile people are holding up sighs with stupid slogans on them. Jack is the only one moving, and is shouting various anti-war phrases.)
As you can see, protesters provide vast numbers, but little follow-through and organization. They are content on blaming others, most likely who ever holds the presidency, for their problems. They lack the will to move up and try to change things, and thus are mostly just an annoyance rather than a threat.
Most protesters take the titles of things such "environmentalists" or other such thing under the insidious umbrella called "Activism." Your general anti-smoking advocates are located here.
Moving on…(the scene changes to the switching to the fronts of all natural food markets.) We have the Vegetarians. They, closely coupled with the more extremist vegans, are mostly unaware that they are actually helping bring about the downfall of capitalism. But besides their bad choices, they are practically harmless. Our next group however, are mostly agreed to be the most loathsome and horrible of them all just short of the chief communists themselves. (The scene changes again to a dirt field filled with filthy looking tents.) This rung of the ladder incorporates the worst parts of the previous groups and rolls them all into one giant, shoeless, non-bathing, pot smoking anti-war monger. (Barnette appears in a tie-died non-leather outfit with a purple head band and a sign with a peace sign painted on it. She keep shouting things about how the government needs to give money to help the illegal aliens have more power to take over the country.)
The hippie could be the most dangerous ally to communist's anti-war front, but luckly, they're all to stoned to do much. The only actual way they really help their eviler allies, is by buying the marijuana supplied by the head communist agents. (He scene fades to black.)
The democrats and liberals work on controlling congress and the presidency, while the pure socialists, lead by Michael Moore plan covert strikes to further damage the power and reputation of true Americans.
Finally, you have the true leaders, the full fledged communists. While at this time we have not identified these individuals, we shall keep our diligent followers in the loop.
Thank you and goodnight."
(Duerro reappears in his anchor chair, surrounded by the rest of the cast.)
Duerro: Thank you America.
Rest, Except Jack: and watch the back alleys for evil commie slime balls!
Jack: and remember, if you elect another Clinton, you just helping them win.
(The lights go out)
The End.
