Note: Sorry, this one took forever - in part because I started going down the "Two to Tango" road, in part because I'm just not feeling terribly inspired. That should get worse later this week. :)
Title: Terrible Twos
AU? Well, I assume it will be, but technically not yet.
Disclaimer: I don't own them
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"I'm coming!" Brennan set the sopping wet dishcloth on the table and made her way to the door, dodging the scattered toys along the way. When she was three steps away, her foot came down on a block that was half-hidden under a fallen jacket. Cursing, she hopped to the door and flung it open.
"Hey, Bones."
At the sight of her partner, Brennan became acutely aware of her ratty sweatpants, messy hair, and ketchup-stained t-shirt. How could he manage to look so good? It was almost irritating to see him standing there freshly shaved, clad in impeccable jeans and a t-shirt that hugged his chest. She felt like a disaster area in comparison.
"Come to laugh at me?" She didn't realize how harsh the question was until she saw him wince. She bit her lip as she tried to find a way to make things right – a way to apologize for taking her frustration out on him. "I'm sorry, Booth, I ..."
He cut her off. "It's OK, Bones." He peered past her, noticing the breakfast dishes that still covered the table, the toys that littered the floor, and the very happy boy currently pulling books off the bookshelf. "It looks like it's been a rough week."
Brennan turned to see what had caught his attention and gasped. "Nate!" She rushed over to her son and picked him up. "Those are not your books, honey. Those are mommy's books."
Nate regarded her seriously, then shook his head in denial. "No! Mine books."
"No, Nate. Mommy's books. Here." She set him on the floor beside a bucket of blocks. "These are Nate's toys."
Nate picked up the bucket and upended it, sending blocks scattering across the floor, and Brennan turned her attention back to Booth. "Sorry, Booth. Megan has been sick all week – I called the agency, but they were out of substitute nannies. How is the case going?"
Booth took in her appearance – the bags under her eyes, the disheveled clothing, the limp, greasy hair – and said, "He's been running you ragged, hasn't he?"
Brennan opened her mouth to answer, only to find herself sobbing. Booth wrapped his arms around her and held her as she cried out the frustration of the week, patting her back and murmuring soothing words in her ear.
When she had finished crying, she pulled away, realizing she had again let him comfort her as she fell apart – despite everything that had gone on between them. "You don't have to let me sob all over you."
Booth cupped her cheek. "I don't mind. We're partners, right? Partners look out for each other."
She nodded, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand, and he continued, "You look like you need a break, Bones, and it just so happens that I have the day free. How about I take Nate for the day?"
Once, Brennan would have spent a free Saturday working – identifying bodies from bone storage, working on her novel, consulting with colleagues from around the world. Now all she could think of was a nice, hot bath – thirty minutes of uninterrupted time with no one calling for her or making a mess. She couldn't ask Booth to do that, though. Nate was her child, her responsibility. "That's nice of you, Booth, but I can't impose..."
Booth shook his head. "You're not imposing, Bones. It'll be great – Nate and I will go off and do guy things, and you can do whatever you want – read a book, take a shower, get your nails done, whatever."
He waggled his eyebrows and Brennan laughed, wondering at how his mere presence could make her feel better. "Nate is two, Booth. I hardly think he's going to want to do guy things. I'm not even sure I want to know what's included in 'guy things'".
Booth grinned at her. "You're not a guy, Bones, couldn't tell you anyway." He clapped his hands together. "OK, is there a diaper bag or something?"
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Six hours later, Brennan's apartment was clean – toys picked up, floors vacuumed, surfaces within the reach of small hands washed. She had taken a bubble bath, reading until the water had gone cold, then crawled into bed and slept for an hour.
She woke refreshed and pulled on clean jeans and a flattering shirt. She dried her hair, noticing as she did that the circles under her eyes didn't seem as dark as they had before.
She had a bite to eat and curled up on the couch with a journal, noticing for the first time how empty her apartment seemed. It was a relief when the door opened and Nate came barreling in, yelling "Mommy!"
She crouched down and pulled him into her arms, then stood and planted a kiss on his lips. "Nate! I missed you. Did you have a good time with Booth?"
Nate nodded vigorously. "Big truck."
Brennan looked at Booth and raised her eyebrows inquiringly. "That's right, buddy.", Booth agreed. He grinned at Brennan. "They tore down the building next to mine. We went to my place for a nap and saw the trucks hauling away debris."
Brennan brushed Nate's hair off his forehead, then started undoing his jacket. "That sounds exciting, Nate. What else did you do?"
"Playground."
"You went to the playground?", Brennan asked, "Did you go on the slide?"
Booth laughed. "He was fearless."
Brennan pulled off Nate's jacket and grinned at his stained shirt. She looked up at Booth. "I see you had something to eat."
"Spaghetti. Sorry, I didn't have another shirt for him."
"That's OK. Come on, Nate, it looks like it's time for you to have a bath." She pulled off his shoes and tossed them by the door.
"No!"
"Yes, Nate, you need a bath." Brennan walked towards the bathroom, calling over her shoulder, "You're welcome to stay, Booth. Have a seat."
Nate protested, but once he was in the tub, he had such a good time splashing and playing with his bath toys that he didn't want to get out. When he was clean, dry, and dressed in his pajamas, Brennan took him out into the living room. Booth was sitting on the couch, flipping through the journal she had left on the coffee table. "Booth?"
At the sound of her voice, Booth looked up. When he saw Nate, he grinned. "Looking good, buddy. Is it bed time?"
"Yes", Brennan replied. "We were just going to read a story. Do you want to come with us?"
Booth jumped to his feet. "I love stories. Lead the way."
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When the stories were read and Nate had been tucked in, Booth and Brennan settled on the couch, both of them instinctively angling their body to face the other. Brennan's head rested against the back of the couch as she looked at the familiar face of her partner.
There had been a time where such an easy familiarity would have been unheard of – a time when Booth's commitment to Hannah and Brennan's decision to have a child on her own had come between them. They had still been partners, but their time together had been largely limited to work hours.
Over the past few months, they had started to grow closer again, meeting for lunch when there had been no case for a while, doing paperwork together in the evenings after Nate was in bed instead of in the office or on their own.
Brennan took a sip of her wine, then said, "Thank you, Booth. You didn't have to take him today."
"He's a good kid, Bones. I liked hanging out with him."
Brennan set the wine glass on the coffee table and asked, "Does it make me a horrible mother that I enjoyed the time alone?"
"You're a great mom, Bones." Booth's eyes captured hers, the sincerity in them unmistakable. "But kids, they're a lot of work. There's nothing wrong with needing a break."
"You thought I was making a mistake when I had Nate. You thought ..." Brennan stopped to take a deep breath. "You thought I wouldn't be a good mother." The words echoed in the quiet apartment.
"No!" The denial was out of his mouth before he knew he was going to speak. "No, Bones." She hadn't told him she was considering motherhood. Why would she have? He was becoming more and more involved with Hannah, and he and Brennan were drifting farther and farther apart. She had made the decision on her own – researching potential sperm donors, meeting with doctors, investigating child care options.
When she finally told him, she was already pregnant. He had been under the impression that she had abandoned the idea after he had turned her down, and he was shocked to find out that she had gone through with it. As much as he wanted to be happy for her, the months that followed were torture. He had always wanted more children, and watching the woman he had loved for years grow big with another man's child was a constant reminder that he would not have another child as long as he was with Hannah. He had pulled back, hoping that distance would help him accept his life as it was.
Now, though, he realized that she had misinterpreted his distance. There was nothing to do but tell the truth. "I was jealous, Bones. I knew you'd be a good mom. You have so much love to give – there was no doubt in my mind that any child would be lucky to have you as a parent. I just … I wanted another child, and Hannah didn't. It was hard for me to see you getting what I wanted, especially since … since for a while I hoped we'd have a child together."
"Oh." When she told him she was pregnant, he had seemed shocked. The logical inference was that he thought she wouldn't be a good parent. His words now made her look at the last few years in a new way, as if she had suddenly discovered that she was wearing glasses that distorted the view.
"Nate's a great kid, Bones, and he's lucky to have you for a mom." His eyes bored into hers, begging her to believe him.
"Thank you, Booth", she replied quietly.
They relaxed into a companionable silence, lost in thought. When Brennan had come to terms with their discussion, she shifted to look at him and asked, "Do you still want more kids?"
He met her gaze. "Yes."
She stood up and walked towards the balcony doors, unreasonably upset at the idea of him having a child with someone else. "But … you're not dating anyone, are you? I don't recall you mentioning a sexual partner since Hannah left."
"No", he answered, "I'm not dating anyone."
She bit her lower lip, worrying it with her teeth. Still looking out the window, she asked, 'Why not?"
"You know why not, Bones."
She turned her back to the balcony doors and faced him. 'No, I don't, Booth. If you want kids, it is only reasonable for you to be looking for a sexual partner, someone who wants what you want."
He stood and walked towards her as she took an involuntary step back, stopping when her back hit the cool glass of the door. "You know why not, Bones. I told you once that I'd love you for thirty or forty or fifty years. I can't stop loving you, and I can't find someone else and love you at the same time. I tried with Hannah, and it wasn't fair to her. I can't do that again."
He was so close that she could feel his breath on her face. It had been a long time since they'd been physically this close to each other, and she fought to concentrate. "You loved Hannah, Booth. You told me so more than once.'
"I did love her, Bones, but not the way I love you. I couldn't. You're it for me."
Her mind raced as she tried to make sense of his words. "Then … I don't understand. You told me you'd moved on. You haven't given me any indication that you want a sexual relationship with me."
"I want it all with you, Bones. Sex, yes, but also love, a shared life, a family. But … somewhere along the way, we became 'just partners' – only seeing each other for professional reasons. I know that's changing now, but I didn't want to pressure you into more than you were ready for."
He stepped back, increasing the distance between them. "I can wait, Bones. I hope someday you'll want what I want, but if that doesn't happen, I want to be part of your life in whatever way you're comfortable with."
"What if I already want what you want?"
Booth smiled, but his eyes were sad. "You need to know, Bones. I can't lose you again."
Brennan took a step forward until they were toe to toe. "I know, Booth." She placed her hands on his shoulders and reached up to capture his lips in a gentle kiss. "I told you that a long time ago."
She kissed him again, trying to communicate the depth of her feelings. He reciprocated, and the kiss deepened. When they finally parted, he asked, "Are you sure?"
Her eyes met his, her expression serious. "You know I can't promise you forever, but I do know that I can't picture my life without you in it."
He smiled, almost giddy at the thought that she loved him back. "I can't picture my life without you in it, either, Bones. I don't ever want to." He stepped back, knowing that if he didn't leave soon, he wouldn't want to go. "I should go. Hey, do you want to get breakfast or something tomorrow?"
Brennan took his hands in hers. "Stay."
She kissed him again, then let go of one hand to lead him towards the bedroom. When they reached Nate's room, she glanced in, happy to see that Nate had drifted off to sleep. They continued down the hall until they reached the master bedroom.
There was a moment of awkwardness as they realized the enormity of the step they were taking, but soon their clothes lay discarded on the floor and they were lying on the bed.
They knew each other so well, yet this was a new experience for them. They made love slowly, taking their time and enjoying the process of learning each other's likes and dislikes.
By the time Booth slipped inside of her, Brennan was approaching her second orgasm. The feel of him inside of her pushed her over the edge again, and he stilled as she pulsed around him. When he finally began to move, he kept his thrusts slow and shallow, giving her time to recover. She moaned as he stimulated already sensitive nerves, but when he began to move faster, she moved with him, surprised to feel herself approaching yet another orgasm.
He couldn't hold out forever, and his pace increased as he got closer to the edge. He came, and seconds later she followed. He rolled off of her and pulled her into his arms, pulling the covers over them.
He was almost asleep when she spoke. "Booth?"
"Mmmhmm?"
"Yes, I'd like to have breakfast with you tomorrow."
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Of a kind? Little pigs? Musketeers?
