Sharon woke on Saturday morning, a week later, when she heard Harper stirring in her crib. The rest of the nursery furniture was in storage until Sharon could find a bigger condo. She lay in bed, trying to force herself to get up. She hadn't worked terribly long hours that week, but getting accustomed to having a baby to take care of had taken its toll on her. Her team had spoken to Harper's parents' attorney and to everyone at their funeral, and it was clear that there was no one connected to the Bennetts who was willing to take custody of her. When Sharon heard Rusty creep in and pick up Harper, she could have cried with relief, but she felt a little guilty.
"Go back to bed, Rusty, I'm getting up."
"No, you can go back to sleep. You looked exhausted last night."
"I owe you big time," Sharon murmured, closing her eyes again. She smiled as she heard Rusty talking to Harper.
"Morning, Harps! Ready for a bottle?" Rusty lifted Harper from her crib and carried her into the living room to change her diaper before feeding her. Sharon woke up a couple of hours later, feeling much more refreshed. She got dressed for the day and went into the living room at 8:30. Rusty was rocking a sniffling Harper, patting her back and speaking softly to her, in the recliner that Sharon had gotten from her storage unit. There was a rocking chair in Harper's nursery, that was now in Sharon's room, but she wanted to be able to rock her in the living room, as well. Harper was lying restlessly against Rusty's shoulder and obviously wasn't too happy.
"What's wrong?" Sharon asked, growing concerned.
"She's been crabby all morning. This is the happiest I've been able to get her. She's about ready for a nap, though."
Sharon walked over to them and took a closer look. "Hmm, she looks a little flushed."
"Yeah, she feels warm, too. Warmer than normal, anyway. I think."
Sharon felt Harper's forehead, sighing softly when she felt a little fever. "Yes, she has a fever. It's not too high, though. You should have woken me, honey."
"Oh, I was going to in a few minutes if you didn't get up. I didn't notice she felt warm until about thirty minutes ago, so I gave her some Motrin, and I thought you would probably be up soon, anyway. I mean, I could have figured out what to do after that, but I knew you would know."
Sharon studied Harper intently. "She doesn't sound congested or anything..."
"I know. She's soaked both of my shoulders from drooling, so I thought she might be teething. That can cause a fever, right? But she seems a little young for that. Exactly how old is she, again?"
"She'll be five months old next week. She was born August 18th. And Emily was almost a year old before she cut her first tooth, but Ricky was barely four months old, so there's a wide range for teething to begin. I remember being afraid that Emily wasn't going to have any teeth at all! They never had any problems with it, but it can cause a low fever." Sharon took Harper from Rusty and kissed her forehead. "You're not feeling too good, baby girl?" Harper whimpered as she was being taken from Rusty, but she settled comfortably on Sharon's shoulder. Sharon slipped her finger into Harper's mouth and gently felt along her bottom gums. "Yes, she does have a tooth coming in. Is that mean old tooth hurting my baby?"
"Why does teething cause a fever?"
"I don't know. It makes her gums hurt and inflamed, so maybe some babies' bodies think that a new tooth is a form of infection? I have no idea. Emily nor Ricky ever had a fever from teething, so I never really thought about it."
Rusty looked at the innocent baby, with tears of pain still in her eyes, lying on Sharon's shoulder. "Oh, my god, Sharon, when she asks for a pony, please get her one."
Sharon laughed. "You'll change your tune when she's a sassy, screaming, banshee of a toddler. Do you remember where I put her thermometer? I set it aside somewhere. She has been in daycare for a week, so I need to keep an eye on her temperature. She could have picked up something there and just happen to be teething at the same time."
"Yeah, I put it in the medicine cabinet." Rusty walked into the kitchen and returned with the thermometer in his hands. "This must be her first fever, it hasn't even been opened." He opened the thermometer and handed it to Sharon. "I'll, um, let you take care of that," he muttered, looking nervous.
Sharon laughed. "Rusty! It goes in her ear!"
Rusty blushed and took Harper from Sharon. "Well...I probably won't do it right." Still chuckling, Sharon turned the thermometer on and gently placed it in Harper's ear.
"100.3. As long as it stays under 101 and is gone by Monday, it's probably just teething." Rusty looked relieved, then mildly disgusted as he felt a sensation which he knew meant that Harper was filling her diaper.
"Ugh, Harper, why am I always holding you when you do that?" Rusty grumbled when she was finished. He started toward the changing table.
"I'll change her, Rusty."
"Nah, it's okay. I just like giving her a hard time. Come on, stinkpot, let's change your shitty drawers."
"Rusty!" Sharon tried to scold him, but she was laughing too hard to get any further in her reprimand.
"What? It's not like she knows what I'm saying."
"True, but you should make a point not to say things like that in front of her. Before we turn around, she'll be big enough to not only understand what you're saying, but to repeat it. And probably at the worst time possible, like the children's sermon at church," Sharon said, remembering the time Emily had announced to the whole congregation that her mommy had called her daddy a worthless asshole, and her daddy had called her mommy a frigid bitch. The priest had picked the worst Sunday possible to talk to the children about the importance of being kind and not calling people names.
Rusty handed Harper back to Sharon after getting her cleaned up and in a fresh diaper. "That's a story I want to hear later. I'm going to go back to sleep for a little bit, but I'll help you finish going through her stuff while she's taking a nap. Why don't you try to keep her up until 9:30 and feed her first? Maybe she'll sleep a little longer, since she won't wake up hungry."
"Honey, you don't have to do that. And you didn't have to get up with her this morning either, although I really appreciated it. But, she's my responsibility, not yours. I don't expect you to take care of her for me."
"You didn't have to miss a week of work to take care of me when I had the flu a couple of months ago, either. But, you care about me, and I care about you. And Harper. I want to help you."
" All right...But please only do what you really want to do. Don't do anything for Harper because you feel like you have to, or like I expect you to."
"I won't." Rusty went back to sleep for about an hour before getting back up to help Sharon sort through the rest of Harper's things from her parents' house. They sat in the living room, surrounded by boxes, as Harper napped in her crib in Sharon's room.
"I spoke to the people in the leasing office of this building yesterday, and there's a three-bedroom condo that will be available in a couple of weeks. We can walk through a model of it on Monday."
"We're moving? But won't that be a lot more expensive?"
"Harper can only share a bedroom with me until she's two. She needs her own space before then, anyway. And, we just need more room, in general."
"Yeah, but I'll be eighteen by the time she's two."
"But you will be a freshman in college, and you may decide to live at home instead of the dorm, if you go to college in LA. And, even if you don't, you better visit enough to still need your own room." Sharon could see the wheels in Rusty's head turning. She worried that he thought things would be easier for her if he didn't live with her. "Honey, some of the money from the Bennetts' estate will cover the difference in cost, since Harper is the reason we're moving, and I'm selling the house. Even if I did have to pay more from my own money for a bigger condo, it's worth it."
"How were those people so rich, anyway? They couldn't have been that old."
"They were in their mid-thirties, and Harper's father invented some multi-million dollar app. Harper's mom was the only child of wealthy parents, so when they died, she inherited a fortune. They paid cash for that three-million-dollar house."
"Good lord."
"I know. Money from their estate will cover Harper's education, clothes, food, and all of that, but she'll still have a good bit left over once she's grown up and on her own." Rusty looked less worried, and they continued sifting through Harper's mountain of belongings until she woke up almost an hour later. Rusty jumped up to get her when they heard her whimpering. Sharon listened as Rusty entered her room and picked up Harper. "What's wrong? You usually wake up a little happier than this. You still don't feel good?" Sharon realized that Rusty was right. Harper had woken up crying for the first couple of days, but had stopped once she got used to being in Sharon's condo.
"Sharon? Does she feel warmer to you?" Rusty asked, walking into the living room with a clearly unhappy Harper in his arms. Sharon kissed her warm forehead, lingering for a moment to gauge her temperature.
"Maybe a little, but I think her fever is still pretty low. I'll check her temperature again in a couple of hours."
"Are you sure?" Rusty looked worried.
"Yes, honey. Don't worry, she'll be all right."
By Sunday night, Harper seemed to be herself again. Sharon and Rusty had spent most of Saturday and Sunday taking turns holding Harper and going through her belongings. Most of it was going back in the boxes since they were moving soon, but there were things that they needed before then. Sharon had found the sound machine Provenza had mentioned the night of the murder, and she hoped it would help Harper sleep through the night. She had been waking up and crying for at least ten minutes a couple of times a night before going back to sleep. Sharon would have gotten her up if she had cried much longer than that, but she always went back to sleep on her own.
"All right, sweet girl, let's get you bathed and into bed," Sharon said, lifting Harper from her bouncy seat.
"Can I put her to bed?"
"Not tonight, honey. You need to finish your homework, and I'm going to try to figure out a bedtime routine for Harper, since we found her books and sound machine today. I know she goes to sleep pretty easily in our arms, but I want her to learn to put herself to sleep. A routine will help with that, and hopefully with the screaming she's been doing in the middle of the night."
"I'll do anything to help with that."
Sharon passed Harper to Rusty. "You can give her a bottle while I get her bath ready." Sharon fixed a bottle and gave it to Rusty and prepared a medicine dropper with Motrin to give Harper before she went to sleep.
"I thought her fever was almost gone?"
"It is, but her gums are probably still a little sore, and even a slight fever will make her uncomfortable. I'm going to give this to her before bed, just in case." Sharon went to the bathroom and ran the bathwater while she set a diaper and pajamas on her bed and got a towel and washcloth from Harper's collection of stuff in her room. After checking the water temperature, she sat on the edge of the tub and let the water run for a few more minutes before putting Harper's bath seat in and going to get her from Rusty.
"SHARON! Oh, my god, Sharon! Get in here!" Alarmed, Sharon sprinted down the hall to the living room, where she had left Rusty giving Harper her bottle. "Honey! What's the-honestly, Rusty, it's a little spit-up," she said, relieved to find that the problem was merely a white substance on his neck and shoulder, rather than a choking baby, or something worse.
"But it smells awful! And, it's, like, warm," Rusty said, turning away from Harper and gagging. Harper was laughing and looking pleased with herself, and Sharon was laughing so hard she couldn't move. "Sharon! If you don't get this off of me, you're going to have two messes to clean up, and I'm not even kidding." Seeing that Rusty was starting to look a little green, Sharon wet a dishcloth and wiped the offending substance off of his neck and t-shirt before taking Harper from him. He jumped up and tore his t-shirt off as fast as he could.
"Rusty, honestly. You can change the nastiest of diapers without flinching, but a little spit-up grosses you out?"
"I know, I know, it doesn't make sense. Night, Harps," Rusty said, kissing her cheek and scratching her back. "Good luck with that routine. I hate to break it to you, but she's just getting warmed up with the rules." He ducked out of the way before Sharon could swat at him.
Once Harper was bathed and in her pajamas and sleep sack, Sharon decided to give her the Motrin before reading to her and putting her down for the night. She held the dropper to Harper's mouth, but she turned away and clamped her lips shut. "Come on, Harp, it will make you feel better," Sharon pleaded. A few more attempts and a face full of spit-out Motrin later, Sharon appealed to Rusty.
"Rusty! Will you please bring me the Motrin, and see if you can get Harper to take it?" Rusty appeared a moment later with the Motrin and refilled the dropper.
"Are you giving Mommy a hard time?" Rusty cooed, tickling her and making a face. Once she was laughing, he sneaked the dropper into her mouth and watched as she swallowed it before she realized what she was doing. "See? Not so bad, is it?" Rusty took the Motrin and medicine dropper and returned to the kitchen, leaving a stunned Sharon. She hadn't referred to herself as anything to Harper, because she didn't know how Harper calling her 'Mom' would affect Rusty. It would be perfectly fine with her for Rusty to call her 'Mom,' too, but she could tell he still missed his own mother, and she didn't want him to think she was trying to take his mother's place, or pretend that she didn't exist. She knew she would have to tackle the problem within the next few months, because Harper would be able to say 'ma-ma' soon, and it felt weird not referring to herself as 'Mommy,' anyway. Rusty had solved that problem for her pretty easily, though.
Sharon sat with Harper in the rocking chair in her bedroom and read two books, turned her sound machine on, sang two verses of 'Jesus Loves Me,' and rocked her to sleep. At first, she thought her song choice was a little cliche, but soon realized that there was something spiritually fulfilling about singing that song while rocking a baby. Her original plan had been to put Harper down while she was still awake after singing to her, but she decided to rock her to sleep for the first couple of weeks to help her body make the connection between the bedtime routine and sleep. Once Harper was sleeping, Sharon kissed her forehead and laid her in her crib, patted her stomach a couple of times, and left the room.
Sharon found Rusty at the dining room table, finishing up his homework. He looked up when she came in. "I'm sorry, Sharon, I just assumed Harper would be calling you 'Mom' at some point. I haven't heard you actually call yourself anything in front of her, and it just slipped out."
"No, honey, I'm glad you did that. I had been debating about it for a while. I do want her to call me 'Mom,' but I hesitated, because...I didn't want you to think that it was okay for her to call me that, but not for you. You certainly can, if you ever decide you want to, but-"
"Sharon, that is so different. You're going to be the only mother she knows."
"I know...I just, I don't know. I'm glad you cleared that up for me, though."
"Do you think she, like, misses her parents?"
"I don't know. If she were to see them, I'm sure she would recognize them and want to be with them, and she is obviously aware that she lives with different people now, but I don't know if she actually misses them or expects them to come back."
Rusty nodded thoughtfully as he packed his book bag. "I'm going to watch TV for a while before I go to bed."
"Save me a seat. I'll be right there." Sharon poured herself a glass of wine and got a blanket for them to share before joining her son on the couch.
