N/A Only 5 reviews… *Sighs* I'll dedicate some drabbles to the people who sent some reviews… I'm updating because 5 seems to be my lucky number. At least it was in my other fic.

I'm creating the character profile but it's very difficult to know how the heck are your countries, latinos fellows. If for a contrived case of the fate The One Behind You is reading this, I'm writing a dialogue pattern because I'm very new in this of making fics.

Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia. Heck, the first isn't even mine but adapted from pic in the Hetamericafanclub on Devianart. I only own the original idea of applying the rule of Hetalia in Hetamerica. Some information comes from Wikipedia, Tvtropes, Hetalia Wikinet and the aforementioned Hetamericafanclub.

United States of Hetamerica

Latinos and their Funny Facts

"There was a time where Old America, Aztecan Empire, Incan Empire and Mayan Empire ruled over the American continent…"

"These are the stories of their descendants, and their influence over the world of… HETALIA!"

Cute for you, Delicious for me!

Peru: Gracias for coming, Ponja!

Ecuador: Si, it's nice to see you hewe!

Japan: Not a problem-arimasen. Italia-kun told me that here's a good place to spend some short vacations. (background: Veh~!)

Peru: Hey Ponja do you like cuys?

Japan: Nani ka?

Ecuador: Guinea Pigs!

Japan: Daisuki da! While more of them, better! (background: loads and loads of cute hamsters)

Peru and Ecuador: Then, you're lucky because we made these roasted cuy for you?

Japan: x_x

Peru: Ponja?

Ecuador: Is he OK?

[Ponja] Ponja is a Peruvian slang for Japan. It's the reverse of the syllables of his Spanish name. (Japón-Ponja)

[Cuy] Guinea pigs (called cuy, cuye, curí) were originally domesticated for their meat in the Andes. Traditionally, the animal was reserved for ceremonial meals by indigenous people in the Andean highlands, but since the 1960s it has become more socially acceptable for consumption by all people. It continues to be a major part of the diet in Peru and Bolivia, particularly in the Andes Mountains highlands; it is also eaten in some areas of Ecuador (mainly in the Sierra) and Colombia.

Even people from the same Ecuador and Peru faints when they know guinea pigs are eaten here. But it's kind of ironic when you think it. Doesn't Japan eat octopuses and sharks? Doesn't some African countries eat bugs? Doesn't China eat dogs and cats? So on.

Peru: Hetamerica!

Ecuador: Hetamerica!

Japan: Hetalia!

Spexico

America: *Oh Spain!* Spain is such a peaceful land of giant hats and luchadores. Or maybe we're getting that confused?

Mexico: Of course you idiot! Stop making such movies that make chafas and mixed information of me and Spain! I'm not like him! I'll kill you for this!

America: You don't have to go to that extreme!

Mexico: Whaaah! You even know he did to me!

America: I thought he told me you were his s-

Mexico: That's not true!

Spain: *appearing out-of-nowhere* Llamasteis?

Mexico: Hijole! England casts a spell and Russia comes. Someone says 'Spain' and he comes! It's like an ironic curse!

Spain: You don't have to be so bitter, mihijito!

Mexico: (fumes a lot)

Spain: But, it's true! My people don't go in the streets like mariachis. Our bands are called Tuna.

Mexico: My cities aren't his colony anymore! Get that in your head!

Spain: Hey, you can excuse him that.

Mexico: Why?

America: *Why?*

Spain: One can dream, right?

Mexico: (facepalm) Hijole!

America: (in thoughts) They're so similar really. It's just Mexico not wanting to accept it.

Mexico: Oh virgencita… I'm more like my madre Azteca that my padre.

Spain: Who's your daddy? (laughes)

America: That's true, you never tell me.

Mexico: (fumes more) Callate, you pervert!

[Spexico] Fiction writers seem to not just confuse Mexico and Spain, but to fuse them into a strange amalgam of the most general stereotypes of both.

Maybe it's because they share a language and religion, the fact that Mexico used to be a Spanish colony, the exotic foods and customs of a non-Anglo-Saxon culture, or simply that the author Did Not Do the Research and hasn't travelled much, either. American writers also have the excuse that Mexico is closer, geographically, to the US than Spain is, so they're more familiar with Mexican culture, colouring their perception of Spain. Never mind that Mexican culture has also much in common with the Aztec, Maya, and other native civilizations and is much more influenced by American culture; they all speak Spanish, so they must be the same, right?

This is represented by a group or town that is full of stereotypically Mexican or Spanish people, set in a location or doing an activity better suited to the other. That is, when they aren't made into a mish-mash. It could be a Spanish mariachi band at a wedding instead of a tuna singing Clavelitos, or a town of thick-mustachioed men in sombreros and ponchos dancing Flamenco. Inversely, it could be a depiction of Spain as a hot, tropical jungle full of revolutionary outlaws, or even a dictatorship run by a Fascist dictator (technically true during Franco's dictatorship, except there are no tropical jungles in Spain).

Part of this could be that Mexicans have many more demonstrable stereotypes in American pop-culture than Spaniards do. Alternately, U.S. productions will likely have a much easier time casting Mexican actors than Spanish ones (and not care about the accents). Also justified to some degree because, having been a Spanish colony, Mexico still keeps many Spanish traditions.

Of course, there was considerable cross-fertilization between Spanish and Mexican culture, back when Mexico was "New Spain," and some practices they picked up from each other persist to this day. Both countries enjoy churros and hot chocolate, though their traditional recipes now differ, and bullfighting is still very popular in both nations.

And the central Mexican city of Guanajuato (in the state of the same name) fits this too. It is a very well preserved colonial town that closely resembles remote villages in Spain that have not changed much since the Middle Ages. At first glance, Guanajuato is practically indistinguishable from such villages apart from the fact that the population is of course Mexican rather than Spanish. Playing on the town's colonial heritage are bands whose members dress like sixteenth century Spanish noblemen but play traditional Mexican songs of various genres. Furthermore, you can eat tacos or enchiladas and drink micheladas in little inns that seem to have come right from a Toros y Flamenco town (none of which serve Spanish food, by the way).

Well, as a conclusion, like in a war, 'there aren't real winners'

Mexico: Hetamerica!

Football War

England: Why did you come late? In your own qualifier!

America: It's not my fault, Iggy. It's just that (bringing El Salvador and Honduras) these two idiots were fighting!

England: What are you, his mother? If they want to have a war, let 'em be!

America: *I'm a hero!* No, really. Do you at least for what they were fighting? About soccer!

El Salvador: Oh, Northy!

Honduras: HE STARTED! (pointing El Salvador)

El Salvador: NO, SHE STARTED! (pointing Honduras)

Honduras: NO, HE DID!

El Salvador: NO, SHE DID!

America: OK, you don't have to fight…

England: You can't control your underlings? Such a git.

America: Technically… they aren't my underlings.

Honduras: Take this! *appears magically in an angel costume*

El Salvador: No me asustas!

England: Just perfect! That bloody girl spends a lot of time wanting to become her own country and then she uses magic when in danger.

America: (trying to not laugh) You look great, Honduras! But wait, didn't your war just finish?

Honduras: ^v^ SI!

El Salvador: TT_TT Si.

Mexico: Ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta! -_-+ You (pointing El Salvador) go back to your seat! You (pointing Honduras) get lost! You!

America: *Yes?*

Mexico: Return to your match against Bermudas!

England: Thanks, Mexico.

Mexico: De nada.

[Angel Costume] There were two Honduras, one for Spain and one for the British Empire, now Belize. Honduras is just a fangirl of Narnia and Iggy at times doesn't remember these facts.

[Football Wars] Also known as the 100 Hours War, it was the 1969 war between El Salvador and Honduras.

Named so for the rioting that took place during the second round of the North American Qualifier for the 1970 FIFA World Cup in Mexico.

It was fought over Honduran land reform and El Salvador's immigration problem, as well as a border dispute. 4,000 people died in the 4 days of fighting, and the war ended due to intervention from the OAS (no, not the OSS).

One of the few 20th Century wars where the nations eventually earned a happy ending. They signed a peace treaty 11 years after the war ended and Honduras won the disputed territory in a ICJ (International Court of Justice) ruling in 1992.

Noted for being the last war where both sides fought in the skies using piston-engined fighters, namely ex-American World War II and Korean War fighters.

In the case of soccer, El Salvador won a spot for the World Cup, but lost in the Group Stages.

Just one word for this: Ridiculous. Seriously, a war about football?

El Salvador: Hetamerica!

Eh, Macarena!

Venezuela: Now I can have a moment of peace. It's very nice to be alone-

Ecuador: Oye, Vene-chan! Argentina told me you knew flamenco.

Venezuela: It was you Ecuador. Si, I know, why?

Ecuador: I wanted to you perform a concert in my home.

Venezuela: Oh, Ecuador… I can't. My band has a marked tour.

Ecuador: Oh, rayos. I'll go to Colombia or Peru's house, then. (goes away)

Venezuela: Poor girl. She never has the enough money to pat to artists. I'll tell to one of my bands to perform in her house in their next tour. (an alarm sounds) Oh, I've to practice! (dances and sings)

Spain: Oye Vene… look at that funny dance! The sound of that music… is catchy! (dances) Dale a tu alegría, Macarena… Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegria y cosa buena. Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena eeeh Macarena... aaahe!

Venezuela: (stops) Qué haces aquí? (chuckles) You idot! (laughes histerically)

[La Macarena] Famous 90's One Hit Wonder La Macarena made very famous to Venezuela around the world. OK, the duo who sang it was Spanish, but they did get inspiration from a Venezuelan flamenco dancer named Diana Patricia they met during a Latin American tour.

I decided to make a song to Mexico! I dedicate this to my amiga Sayuri! Keep updating the Spanish colonies fic, please! This is Mexico's ending. His version of Hata Futte Parade, inspired by the versions of Spain and America. Ironic, I know.

In my left hand, I have TACOS!

In my right hand, CHOCOLATE!

Throwing a tomato to France in this pastry parade!

Towards the enchanting, Bienvenidos!

Take hands, form a circle, spin and it's the world

I'll take my siesta to be in my best condition!

Verde, Blanco, Rojo and Voltéalo!

America, I want my glasses!

Hetamerica!

[Nice to see you, Romano!

Eeeeh, who's my apa? Why?

Hijole… Did you notice that our flags resemble?]

Throwing a tomato to France in this pastry parade!

Sound your instruments, it's time to march

If everyone at 'one-two' makes a concerto

The only world (song) will be complete

With my mariachi guitar, it's me, Mexico!

[Romano! Do you want some churros?]

Sexy and spicy my women!

And El Día de los Muertos is great!

SIN QUERER, QUERIENDO!

SIN QUERER, QUERIENDO!

SIN QUERER, QUERIENDO! Well, Romano, if you insist…

SIN QUERER, QUERIENDO! My father is Sp…

SIN QUERER, QUERIENDO! SPAIN! What are you doing here?

SIN QUERER, QUERIENDO!

[Idiot! My ama was better than you!

OK! I admit that I was your colony.

But with a lot of efforts… I'm FREE! :D]

Throwing a tomato to France in this pastry parade!

The melody is universal, from all the world!

The 5 continents and the 7 seas

At this energetic rhythm, they traverse each other grandly!

If you go away Spain, I'll give you a fresh tomato!

[Laughs and Cries surround my history, indeed!]

Verde, Blanco, Rojo and Voltéalo!

America, I want my glasses!

Hetamerica!

N/A Do you like it? Please, I'm begging you…

If you review:

If you're Latino, Caribbean or from Africa, please tell me how are your countries because I haven't developed too much their personalities. Avoid the things people can find easily on internet. I want curiosities, popular names, food, and the ethnics from your countries. Right now, I only made Ecuador, Honduras and Brazil a girl, Venezuela, Colombia, Peru, Guiana, French Guyane, Suriname, Uruguay, Paraguay, and Argentina a boy.

If you're European, Australian or Asiatic, please share the stereotypes from our S. American countries. Avoid the very bad ones.

Toon-Girl-Abby's leaving the place… at least now.