(A.N.) I bring you chapter 2 of Sweet Lullaby! I know some of you have been waiting patiently (others quite impatiently) for this chapter, and here it is. I truly enjoyed reading all of the supportive reviews and thanks for liking the story. :)
Warning: This story is yuri, shoujo-ai, or whatever you like to call it, which means FEMALExFEMALE. Also, some parts may be dripping with angst, though it really depends on what you consider to be angsty. However there are attempts at self harm, potty language, and Selphie being a bitch. Sorry to any of you Selphie fans out there.
Disclaimer: I own everything. :D -attacked by lawyers-
Note: Italics means flashbacks, while a break/ruler means a change in POV, which slightly alternates between Tifa and Aerith, or a change in time.
Let the story commence. :D
Aerith stared into the girl's large, chocolate-colored eyes before timidly raising her small hand to lightly grasp the one offered to her. Suddenly she felt herself being pulled up with a strength that seemed inhuman for the lady-like appearance the other brunette displayed.
The brunette turned to a little girl Aerith hadn't noticed before, sprawled on the ground with eyes childishly large and teary. She murmured a word or two to her, and when the little girl nodded and slowly stood up, the brunette turned back to face Aerith. The two stood in an awkward silence that seemed to last for years.
"So…yeah, I'm really sorry about that." The brunette drifted off, blushing slightly as she scuffed her shoe nervously on the pavement. Aerith restrained a small smile trying to creep over her lips before bending down to pick up her schoolbag and dusting it off as she slung it over shoulder.
"It's alright, no damage done." Aerith squinted her eyes as she leaned in closer to the brunette, who in turn leaned back. "I think I know you…weren't you in my biology class last year? Second period." Aerith put a finger on her lips in thought, trying to place a name on the girl.
Recognition dawned on the other girl's features as a smile broke out across her face. "We did the final lab assignment together, what's your name, Aerith!" Aerith nodded, her eyes twinkling in amusement. She paused for a moment as she racked her mind for the other girl's name.
"Tifa, do you want to walk to school together?" Tifa's eyes lit up, but then she looked down at the little girl.
"I can't. I've got to drop my little sister off at the elementary school." Tifa nodded towards the elementary school and shot Aerith an apologetic look as she wrapped her hand securely around her sister's, but Aerith shrugged nonchalantly.
"That's okay. If you're late, we'll both be late. Besides, it's the first day of school so I don't think it'll matter," Aerith shot Tifa a playful wink as she turned in the opposite direction she'd come, waiting for Tifa to take stride with her.
When the brunette took a few timid steps towards her, Aerith turned and began walking. Tifa quickly caught up with her, the little girl clinging to her arm as they began walking in silence not quite as awkward as before. Aerith began humming quietly, occasionally glancing over at the quiet brunette and the little girl holding her hand shyly as her mind began to wander as they often did.
"…Aerith…Aerith!" Aerith snapped out of her thoughts when a hand grasped her shoulder. "We're here." Aerith looked over to Tifa with a slightly blank look on her face before remembering where they'd walked.
"Oh!" Aerith laughed slightly. Tifa broke out into a smile, though more directed to her little sister as she guided them inside the school and to a classroom full of terrified children clinging and crying to their parents, while others had the better of curiosity and began socializing with other kids and exploring their new class.
"Here we are Marlene," Tifa bent down to her little sister, squeezing her hand slightly before embracing her, "now remember I'm going to pick you up after school today, so don't go wandering around." Marlene looked up into Tifa's eyes as large tears began to form.
"I don't want to go!" Marlene sniffled and pouted as a young woman, Aerith assumed as the teacher, greeted them with a warm smile.
"Don't worry Marlene. This nice lady here is going to take care of you today! I promise I'll come back for you. It's going to be fun. Remember how excited you were this morning?" Tifa grinned and smoothed the little girl's neatly combed hair that had been tied into a ponytail before looking over at the smiling Aerith.
"That's right, I'm going to be your teacher," a blonde-haired, blue-eyed lady no older then her late twenties looked down at Marlene kindly as she offered a hand. When Marlene looked back to Tifa, she gave her an encouraging smile.
"Bye Marlene," Tifa whispered, handing the little girl her school bag as she stood up, heading out the door with Aerith following her leisurely behind.
"I almost feel guilty for leaving her," Tifa admitted as they made their way back onto the sidewalk and towards the high school. Aerith laughed.
"You didn't notice how close she was to crying when you walked out the door," Aerith teased, pushing Tifa slightly with her shoulder. Tifa sobbed, pretending to wipe away her tears.
"Our little girl is growing up so fast!" Tifa let out another loud sob as a couple walking by shot her strange looks before the two girls broke out into a comfortable laughter.
As their laughter subsided, Tifa decided she was quite happy to have befriended the pink-clad brunette. From experience, Aerith had been the first person that had been so willing to be friendly to her. But with that thought, Tifa wondered with a stroke of apprehension if it was because she hadn't heard the vicious rumors…
"Dyke!" Tifa held her stinging cheek and looked angrily up at the girl leering over her. Tifa spat vehemently on the girl's smoldering red dress. The smirk on the girl's face disappeared as she looked down at the offended, expensive fabric with disgust before kicking Tifa violently in the side with a long red heel. Red painted nails grazed her cheek as she was slapped again in the same spot. A group of kids had encircled them, jeering and chanting.
"Fight! Fight! Fight!" The group screamed savagely.
"You stupid bitch! I don't want your fucking fag germs!" Tifa gasped in pain as she was grabbed tightly by her hair and slapped three more time—but she refused to fight back. The crowed groaned and laughed.
"S-Scarlet!" Came a surprised voice as a pair of strong ,masculine arms wrapped around Scarlet's hands and pried her away from Tifa. She fell to her knees, drops of crimson blood splattering to the cold, hard cement of the courtyard. Slowly, she raised her hand to wipe her split lip. It merely smeared across her hand, and she was sure it had smeared across her face as well.
Scarlet screamed, her face flushed with anger and exerted energy as she tried to hit Tifa again. She winced slightly, shying away as the teacher-she didn't look up to see who-tried to restrain the girl. She was vaguely aware another man had come and dragged Scarlet away, kicking and screaming.
"She's a fucking dyke! She doesn't deserve to live!" Tifa felt warm liquid begin to spill down her face, and afraid it was more blood, quickly wiped it away. She stared at her hand and the crystalline tears shining in the bright glow of sunlight.
"C'mere…Let's get you cleaned up," came that kind voice as large hand helped her to her feet. Tifa recognized it as her art teacher.
"It…it had to be Elena…" Tifa whispered thickly, her mind muddled and disoriented. She was her best friend. Tifa had trusted her with her deepest secret, she had told her everything! And Elena seemed to accept her--she had seemed fine about it when Tifa told her! To think she had been betrayed by her! To think she told Scarlet something so utterly personal as her orientation...
Tifa knew Elena had always wanted to befriend Scarlet, but Scarlet hated Tifa and refused to have anything to do with her or her friends. Elena had betrayed her. The thought kept repeating itself over and over in her head like a self-destructive mantra. Those years of friendship meant nothing to her. Those times of laughter, of sadness and joy…Elena wanted to throw it all away, just for a chance to be accepted as cool and popular.
Tifa didn't want to fight back--what was she fighting for? Maybe before this mess she would have…but what would she be protecting—defending, by fighting back? In Scarlet's mind her actions were justified, so who was Tifa to say whether she was right or wrong to protect beliefs that, in her mind, were valid? Elena had been not only her best friend, but her first crush. When she had fallen for that blonde, silky hair and that curvy body, Tifa knew that this was what felt right; this was what she wanted. Of course now, it would be all over the school that Tifa was a lesbian. Scarlet would make sure of it. She would make sure that it would never feel right to feel that way again.
Tifa grimaced at the memory and looked over at Aerith carefully, trying desperately to find anything hidden in those delicate, beautiful features that held malice. There was nothing, only happiness and compassion radiating so painfully obvious, and those emerald eyes that glowed so deeply…
"Aerith," Tifa began nervously, making sure to keep her gaze anywhere but the girl's sweet face, "have you, you know…heard what people say about me?" Tifa looked up suddenly, just in enough time to see something stirring behind her eyes as she smiled.
"Haven't heard anything," Aerith said quietly, shooting Tifa a curious look. When she only stared straight back at her, Aerith smiled a little bit brighter.
"Well whatever people say about you surely isn't as bad as you might think," She murmured softy. Tifa started, staring directly into Aerith's shimmering emerald orbs. Aerith merely giggled and linked their arms together, bouncing slightly as they walked.
Tifa sighed and looked towards the approaching school, trying to restrain a grin. She understood what Aerith was trying to tell her and she appreciated it, regardless of what she really felt. Suddenly, Aerith stopped and bent down, dragging the other brunette with her.
"Aw, what a pretty flower!" Aerith sighed in utter contentment as she gazed at a small flower, by no means the prettiest Tifa had seen. It was tiny and looked so alone and overshadowed amongst the weeds, which were slowly but surely dominating the edge of the crumbling sidewalk like an infestation. The flower's color was considerably poor to what it could be: a dying fade of purple and pale yellow towards the middle—an iris. Tifa blinked as she looked at the somewhat morbid sight of the leaves and petals drooping with an exhaustion well fought. She lowered her head to inspect the iris, long chocolate-colored strands of hair falling into her eyes as she raked her gaze along the stem, to the weeds towering over the flower threateningly.
Aerith gently trailed her hands up the stem to curve around the bulb of the flower, lightly grasping it and tugging it with the utmost care as if it were an expensive piece of glass. Tifa let her eyes travel up the length of Aerith's extended arm to her face. Her lips were drawn back into a small smile that held the grace of one who understood the pain of others and kindness that offered to shelter anyone from time and weariness. And those beautiful emerald eyes that shone like they were jewels themselves gazed almost longingly at the flower, as if she could save it from inevitable death.
It was such a beautiful, surreal image of the pink-clad girl on her knees with a flower caressed in her hands, an ethereal air held about her. It had come easily out of the ground, as if beckoned to the warmth of Aerith's delicate palm. Tifa began to develop a feeling of nostalgia she couldn't quite place, and as those earthen eyes looked up warmly to Tifa, she felt that feeling only intensify.
Aerith beamed with happiness as the flower lay in her hand, almost as if it were happy to be rid of the entangling, suffocating weeds. She knew it was stupid to call this flower beautiful. But still, it only seemed right to do so to when it reflected so much what any other person could experience--she cast a glance at Tifa.
When Tifa's gaze met with hers, she turned her attention back to the iris in her hand. She knew that Tifa must have thought her crazy for calling this poor little flower beautiful. But this flower struggled for life every day. It suffered just to exist as weeds slowly covered the expanse of the sidewalk and suffocated the it. But even the most gorgeous rose couldn't compare to the beauty of this iris. To have a beautiful rose required the clipping of new buds, of death to new life--its mutant beauty fed on the utmost pampering and care. But this iris struggled to live. Everything was a challenge for the dying flower, but it still fought for everything it deserved. Because of that, it would be more beautiful then the plumpest, reddest rose.
Aerith knew what the rumors were. She didn't care if Tifa was straight as a stick or as gay as a rainbow; Tifa was Tifa. She'd seen her at lunchtime, picking at her food sullenly until some of her friends would arrive at the table. Then, a bright, cheery smile would be forced across her lips and her eyes would brighten with a flickering light. Aerith couldn't tell if that grin was authentic or not—she could have just as well been happy not to be alone. But if anyone looked close enough, they could tell through those dying mahogany eyes that the girl was suffering, and she scoffed at the thought that none of Tifa's "friends" had noticed it. She wasn't sure what would cause the brunette such obvious sadness that no one seemed to notice. Of course, though, everyone had their own inner demons. Aerith slightly grimaced.
Without missing a beat, she rose up slowly, locking her gaze with Tifa as the other girl did the same. Their arms had lost their linkage as Aerith had grabbed the flower, she realized, and she quickly linked their arms again.
Aerith beamed, eyes sparkling in amusement as she placed the stem of the flower behind Tifa's ear, gently pruning the soft petals to look a bit fluffier. Tifa huffed in bewilderment, eyes widening as she tried to glance to the side of her face where the flower sat comfortably. Slowly, Tifa allowed a smile to cross over her face and the girls continued their short trek to school.
Aerith let her eyes drift over to Tifa, noticing the way she kept the flower from falling off its perch by pressing it down occasionally. With an ever-present, she looked back to the sidewalk and their school just ahead. Tifa and that iris…
They were one in the same.
A while later, the two found themselves waiting in an utterly long line to receive things such as their class schedules and school I.Ds. They had come to school relatively on time; however, the long wait had the two standing uncomfortably close together with nothing to say to each other. Aerith stared out across the school campus as the sun shone golden light on the ground, students milling and laughing about as they headed out for their set classes. Aerith fidgeted before finally crossing her arms, not knowing what to do with herself as Tifa pretended to be preoccupied with staring at her nails. Desperately, she tried to think of something to say to Tifa as they waited in the agonizingly slow moving line.
"Tifa, tell me something interesting about yourself." Aerith started conversationally as she looked over to the brunette, arms still crossed and swaying slightly as her twisted braid bumped against her back. Tifa smiled, now taking to twirling the iris in her hand. She began tapping her foot against the dirty pavement as she cast her chocolate eyes upwards in thought.
"Something interesting, hm?" Aerith nodded and leaned forward as Tifa turned her head towards the sky, as if it could help her think of something of not too great an importance, yet personal enough to be considered 'interesting.'
Aerith waited for the girl to speak, suspense building up with every silent second that passed. Finally, Tifa sighed and returned her gaze to the pink-clad girl before her, moving forward a few steps as the line progressed.
"Well…" Tifa started, bringing her hand to her chin and stroking it with consideration. Aerith's eyes widened slightly, nodding in encouragement. "I live with my adoptive father. My real parents died a while ago: my dad by fire, my mom by sickness." There. Not too personal, but interesting enough.
Aerith started slightly, not expecting the other girl to start off a casual conversation with something that required such delicate wording. But it was something the two had in common, regardless. With an apologetic yet understanding smile, she shifted a bit closer to the brunette.
"Me too. My mother died years ago, by what I have no idea. At least, I think so because I was too little to remember what happened when she went missing," Aerith shuddered slightly, trying to suppress unwanted memories of a memory-blurred figure smiling kindly at her, "and I don't even know what happened to my father. I can't remember him."
Suddenly, Aerith broke out into a genuine smile at Tifa's sympathizing nod and added, "But that's okay, because the mom I have now is great and I could never imagine life without her. Ah, kind of stuck up when it comes to church though," Aerith laughed, a simple, beautiful chime as she waited for Tifa, who nodded in agreement, to say anything. She wouldn't pressure her to say something she didn't want to.
However, before anything else had been said Aerith found herself being greeted by some of her friends from last year. Seemingly unnoticed, Tifa was gently pushed away from the circle of gibberish girls that encircled Aerith in excited greetings and heart-warming hugs. Aerith, trying to be nice and return all the greetings to her old friends, missed Tifa silently disappear despite her desperate attempts to maintain their eye contact. A few of the kids in line shifted around, slightly disgruntled at being cut by the bombardment of girls happily chattering away as if they'd done nothing wrong.
Tifa sighed, an ounce of anger and impatience directed at Aerith's friends after they'd pushed Tifa away from the brunette with disregard, as if they'd never seen the two talking together. She recognized two of them as Selphie and Rinoa, two preppy girls who had a knack of "accidentally" bumping into Tifa, or "accidentally" tripping her, or maybe even "accidentally" pushing her food tray into her at lunch as they walked past. Whenever she caught them on it, they'd just look at her innocently, or if they were acting particularly well that day, maybe with some bewilderment and would then try to put the blame on Tifa.
But she looked past it. Tifa honestly tried to be happy, and she was. She remembered the first time she saw an angel, She was surrounded by demons and devils that couldn't touch her because she was protected by a bright, holy light in a large and beautiful oil painting. It wasn't too long ago, maybe a few months after she'd "came out" when she saw it. Of course she knew what an angel was, but when she saw that gorgeous picture she doubted if "angel" could truly describe the brilliance and sheer beauty that the painting emitted.
Tifa sat in her bed, depressed out of her mind. Her life was ruined. Everyone would hate her because of Scarlet. How could she be so stupid as to be a lesbian? She laughed dryly at the thought. She never had a choice in the matter. In one of her many treks alone at school she'd heard kids brag about using drugs, and about self harm. She would never try drugs, that was for sure—her physical health was the only thing she had going for herself. But self harming--did it really feel as good as they said it did? Would it really make her forget the pain, her constant, bitter companion--the only real friend she had?
When Barret was at work and Marlene was fast asleep, she'd sneaked into the kitchen and took out a razor-sharp knife. They'd said it felt good. They said it eased your pain.
Boy, were they wrong. It stung, frankly, like a bitch and she felt slightly woozy at the sight of her own tiny drops of blood after a few half-hearted strokes against her skin. Of course, now she had to wear long sleeves until the tiny cuts scabbed over and healed. She felt annoyed with herself as she washed the knife and replaced it. Feeling totally, utterly alone she made her way back to her bedroom and fell asleep.
The next morning, Barret surprised her with a birthday gift. He told her he'd been saving up money so she could go to an art gallery. He knew how much she'd wanted to go to this showing, even though she'd hardly said a word about it. With a large grin plastered on her face, she gave him a hug that caused the large man to blush before he sent her on her way.
It was breathtaking. Everything was beautiful, abstract or a perfect comparison. Colors meshed together in unorthodox ways and foreign talent blended perfectly.
That was when she saw the large oil painting of the angel. She probably stood almost a half an hour, staring at it with wonder and awe. Nothing could be so beautiful.
"You'd better keep your mouth closed before something lays an egg in there," came a deep and tranquil masculine voice. Tifa's mouth snapped shut and to her embarrassment she realized had begun to drool. Quickly wiping it away in hopes the man didn't see, which was highly unlikely since he seemed so keen, she turned around in search for the owner of the voice. She found herself face to face with a rather large man with a good build and toned skin. He had a scratchy beard and held the air of dignity and respect. He smiled calmly at her before raising his gaze back to the painting. Tifa followed his actions, this time being careful to keep her mouth closed as she stared at the painting.
"What…is that woman?" Tifa felt stupid for asking the question, she was an angel! And immediately she regretted saying it, but before she could try and take it back the man, without looking at her, replied.
"She is a soul of complete purity and love," the man looked at Tifa out of the corner of his eyes that calm smile still on his face. "An angel."
"Do you work out by any chance?" Tifa spun on her heel to face the man and give him a hard slap, but she realized he wasn't coming on to her as she assumed. He was sizing her up, comparing her to something. She huffed and crossed her arms slightly as if to hide her figure, not exactly sure if she met his standards.
"I try," she answered truthfully, and without knowing it she slowly uncrossed her arms in slight curiosity at where he was going with it.
"I own a martial arts dojo, and although it lacks a large amount of students I assure you it is of the highest quality. I'd like to ask you if you'd join. I'm sure teaching you would be a pleasure, and you look exactly like the kind of student who'd enjoy the work." He held out his hand, and inside it there was a business card.
"May I have your name?" he asked as Tifa reached for the card.
"Tifa Lockheart."
"Well then, Miss Lockheart, if things go the way I hope you can refer to me as Master Zangan."
That night Tifa stayed up until the early hours of the morning, thinking about the painting and Master Zangan's description of an angel. Suddenly, she regretted everything she had done. Trying to make herself feel better through the most disgusting ways possible, just to have that selfish bit of euphoria and belonging while others out there suffered from true problems. When she thought on it, she really did have no reason to be upset and to try and harm herself the way she did. It was not her fault she was gay and she was not going to let others think that it was. She had so many good things for herself, yet because of one tiny little setback she let everything fall apart.
She wouldn't do it anymore. If people didn't like her because of the what she was then they she needn't worry about them . They could believe what they want, but she wasn't going to be cowed by them because of it. With a silent apology sent to the beautiful angel, she climbed back into her bed and had the most peaceful sleep she had in a long time.
She smiled at the memory. After that, Master Zangan had taught her almost everything, from manners, to self defense, to inner peace. She believed everything he told her and followed through everything he said. Because of it, she could admit she was a better person then she could have ever hoped to achieve.
When she finally made her way to get her picture taken for her ID, and she mysteriously tripped and fell as Selphie walked by, she stood up as tall as she could and shot her the finger with a small smile on her lips.
They could think what they want, they could believe what they want, and they could hurt her as much as they want but they could never break her.
Aerith let a small, happy smile grace her lips as she saw Tifa's reaction to Selphie's attempt to trip her. It was different from the scuffle that usually happened, and she wondered what made Tifa so calm. She continued watching the brunette making her way to the stool as the cameraman adjusted himself.
"Um, Aerith, you look high," Rinoa said with concern as she waved her hand in front of Aerith's face, Aerith hit it away and rolled her eyes playfully but she continued watching Tifa.
As Tifa picked off a bit of fuzz that clung to her shirt before her picture was taken, she raised her mahogany eyes to the camera but felt herself be almost magically drawn to the surreal emerald orbs that looked at her from the line. She felt her lips pull into a small smile reserved only for the pink-clad girl as she looked at those captivating orbs, but before she could say she was ready the cameraman took her picture.
As she grabbed her ID when it finished processing, she sighed in aggravation and embarrassment. Grimly, she put it into the plastic covering and hooked it into her lanyard.
"Oh gods…I look high." Tifa smacked her hand against her forehead. This was the image that people would recall Tifa with, the face to which people would recall her in her junior year.
Chapter 2 is complete. You likey? Then please review. :B
