SCREAMING IN THE DARKNESS
Far away from the Transylvanian Alps, an ancient city greets the night.
This is no ordinary city, however; this is Berne, epicentre of Switzerland.
Tonight, a feminine scream in the dark does not go unnoticed...
The sound of running footsteps on the damp pavement echoed around the walls. "Somebody! Please! Help me!" The young woman's voice sounded through the darkness.
"Ham and cheese! Someone is in trouble!" Goosewing jumped out of his chair in the outside eating area of the restaurant and, grabbing instinctively for his weapon, he stumbled through the crowd of chair legs and rushed away after the distress call, his ordered meal promptly forgotten with the sole sublime thought that now occupied his brain: 'It's up to me to save them!'
Goosewing turned the corner and saw the young woman trapped in front of the tall fence at the end of the alleyway. He pulled out his vampireometer and glanced at the indicator before pocketing it again.
"Hold it right there, you monster!" He raised his laser stake to his sights and as the vampire turned, he fired.
The vampire gave a shriek and a moment later turned into a cloud of dust.
Goosewing lowered the weapon and walked towards the woman. He held out his hand. "Are you alright, miss?"
She gasped and took his hand, gripping tightly. "Yes, thank you ... oh, if it hadn't been for you ..."
"It's alright now." He squeezed her hand consolingly. "Come, where do you live? I shall escort you home."
"I don't even know your name."
He grinned at her in a feeling of self worth. "Miss. I am Doctor Von Goosewing, at your service."
"Well, I'm very glad to meet you. My name's Claudette." She smiled gratefully back at him for a moment. "I ... I think he was a vampire! Or surely I was just imagining things?"
"You are quite correct." Goosewing led Claudette by the hand out of the alleyway. "He was a vampire."
"B-but surely those things d-don't exist!"
"Oh, believe me." Goosewing frowned in seriousness as they started walking down a street with better lighting. "They do."
Goosewing's mind turned inwards as he looked up to the busy street ahead of them. 'How I wish it were not true ...'
A few streets away in Berne...
Emily raced down the street and turned into an alleyway. She tripped up on the uneven ground. Undefeated, she twisted about and managed to stagger back to a stand.
"No, no! Get away from me you monster!" She screamed, seeing her pursuer turning into the alleyway after her. She spun about and ran again, scrambling up the wire fencing at the end, and climbing up onto the roof of the two story building. The dark silhouette in the alleyway walked to the fire exit stairs and started to climb up.
Emily screamed. She looked around madly, and then pulled a loose tile away from the roof. "Take this!" She flung it at her pursuer. It hit him dead centre and he fell off the stairs onto the ground below. Emily sighed in a moment of relief and then clambered over to the other side of the roof. With some difficulty she managed to get back onto solid ground.
"This guy ... I can't get rid of him." She started to run as fast as she could. "I hide, he finds me ... I'm out of places to disappear to!"
Emily stopped running and stared around her on the busy street she now found herself on. She took a breath to calm herself. It was the long months with the menace of Ganderak on her tail that had created this nervous tension within her.
A weary Emily watched a confident gander and a shaking swan coming towards her. The gander's tweed suit looked decidedly not like the evening wear of a late night clubber. "Hey, excuse me." She interrupted them as they started to walk past her. "Are you from around here, sir?"
"No." The gander hesitated in perfect Austrian, glancing at the woman beside him before looking back to Emily. "Can I help you, miss?"
Emily shrugged. "So you travel around a bit then, sir?"
"Yes. England, Scotland, Hungary, Transylvania, and Poland I have travelled many places for my work ... why ... even the North Pole." He said with his chest puffed out.
"Oh. Now there's a place I haven't thought of going yet! I mean not the North Pole, but ..." Emily raised an eyebrow at the peculiar gander. "Thank you, sir. Have a nice evening. Ma'am." Emily smiled at them and nodded, then she continued up along the street.
When Emily got to the part where the road started going up a hill she turned and headed down a quieter street. She approached the pub on the next corner and stepped inside.
Several sets of eyes turned to her, raking hungrily over her body as she stepped up to the bartender.
"What's a pretty girl like you doin' in a roughneck place like this?"
"Hi, I'm looking for ... Moe."
"That's me, Moe in the know. What information do you need?"
"The whereabouts of ..." She hesitated, looking around the room.
"S'okay, we're all friends in here, ain't we, fellahs?" The whole pub roared in response.
"Well, I'm glad to have so many strong men around willing to help me." She turned to face her audience. "Tell me, who's capable of taking on Von Ganderak?" The pub audibly gasped, and all the rowdy men averted their eyes. "Come on! What are you made of?"
Emily clenched her beak, and then shouted. "Come on, you pathetic bunch of vampires, it's just one slayer!" The room was silent back at her. Emily's eyes filled with tears.
"Look, girly, I'll tell you this: ain't no vampire gonna go after a slayer. That's the rule, that's what they're there for. You gotta be a nutball to take on a slayer, and you likely ain't gonna be around afterwards to regret it."
"But I didn't do anything, and he's after me! Surely there's gotta be some vampire out there ... somewhere who'll stand his ground against Ganderak. I don't care how crazy he is if he can help me!"
"Sure am sorry, Emily." Moe apologised. "There just ain't nobody." He picked up a glass and began polishing it. "But Curly here might be able to help ye out a bit. E's a watcher. E' knows all the vampire hunters and their whereabouts."
Emily looked at Curly in worry. "You've gotta be pretty disturbed to have a hobby like that, Curly."
Curly snorted. "Ah, so there's no skeletons in your bag of tricks, miss Emily Artisia?"
"Go easy on me, Curly Rayne." Emily warned him. "I get a bit peckish now and then." Her beak quirked; "And having Ganderak on my tail certainly builds up an appetite let me tell you."
Curly ducked his head sheepishly. "Beg pardon, miss."
"I don't need someone to tell me what I already know." Emily sighed and turned away from Curly. "He's gonna follow me to the ends of the earth."
"Unless something chancy happens to him." Curly nodded. "Sorry."
Emily stared at the polished wood of the bar. Look on the bright side ... at least she was seeing more of the world before she died. Never mind that it was flying past her as she high tailed it ... "I've never been to Transylvania." Emily mentioned suddenly aloud. "Who lives over in those parts?"
Moe gazed at her. "Count Duckula does for a starters." The bartender picked up another glass. "There's another vampire what's been bird-dogged just like you. Then there's ..."
"Ain't yeh forgetting, Moe?" Curly interrupted. "How long has he been 'bird-dogged' by old Von Goosewing?"
"Uh ..."
"Twenty odd years, that's how long!" Curly Rayne exalted. "Cheer up, Emily! If there's anybody you wanna get a tip from, it's that there Duckula. I reckon you should try talking to him about it."
Moe coughed politely. "You might wanna also talk to his manservant. I'm sure he helps."
Emily hesitated, feeling suddenly cowed. "Man-manservant?"
"Count, he's Count Duckula."
"I always thought those pedigree vampires were a bit pathetic." Emily blushed.
"Never judge a vampire by his fangs."
"Right." Emily nodded knowingly. "Always judge him by his victims." Emily automatically licked her beak. "Hey, Moe, what've you got on tap there?" She asked as she pulled out her purse. "All this stuff about eating is making me peckish."
Von Ganderak staggered to a stand, looking up at the roof of the house.
"My god." He cursed. "She has escaped me again, that vile vampirical vixen." He cursed at her. "You shall not escape me for always, my little duck." He picked up his vampireometer. He looked at the indicators. No vampire in the vicinity. "No, I am too late!" He took a breath, tucking it into his coat. "But you cannot hide for always, my lovely. And then, you shall be the one that is late." He balled his fists and trekked out of the alleyway.
And so we leave busy Berne, with growling in the backstreets and caterwauling in the pubs, with a warning to you all...
You never know who you'll meet lurking out there in the dark.
Goodnight out there … Whatever you are!
