Hi everyone! Thanks so much for all the reviews! :-D
Chapter 2
(which is technically the first chapter, since Chapter 1 wasn't really a chapter…)
"Hi everyone, I'm Princess Zelda, the princess of destiny!" Zelda shouted, making all the other Zelda characters partially deaf for a short time. Someone from the large group booed, but he was quickly kicked out of the building by one of Zelda's many bodyguards (he wasn't an important character anyway; you can tell, because nobody else even noticed that he was gone). "And I'm the hostess of this truth or dare fic! Today we have a total of… drum roll please!" There was a few minutes of silence before Zelda started throwing random objects at the other characters. "I said drum roll, darn it!"
"We don't have anyone who knows how to play drums!" Link protested, hiding from the angry princess behind his shield.
"Oh…well start learning already! You there!" Zelda pointed randomly at someone, "Learn to play the drums, so we can do my show the proper way!"
"Uh…Zelda?" Link asked nervously as the person Zelda had pointed to began to jump around in his excitement over being picked.
"What?" Zelda snapped angrily.
"You picked Tingle for the drums…"
Zelda gave a high pitched scream when she saw that Link was correct, "But he's creepy! And ugly!"
"Tingle Tingle Kooloo-limpah!" Tingle shouted. "These are Tingle's magic words, don't steal them!"
"Whatever," Zelda said. "Just give me a drum roll, so we can get started already!"
"Ok!"
"Now then, today we have a total of…drum roll please!"
Unfortunately, Zelda hadn't given the strange man enough time to learn how to play the drums, and so he continued shouting out his magic words instead. "Tingle Tingle kooloo-limpah! Tingle Tingle kooloo-limpah! Tingle Tingle kooloo-limpah! Tingle Tingle kooloo-limpah!"
Zelda stared at him for awhile before sighing, "Good enough. We have a grand total of… three questions, and three dares for today!"
"Hooray!" Everyone else shouted, except for Tingle, as he was too out of breath from his previous shouting.
"These are…Tingle's…magic words…don't steal them!" he managed to get out before fainting from lack of oxygen.
Everyone ignored him and left him where he was as they all moved to the special 'review room'.
"This first one is from Lostwonder15: I will use a simple question...for Link. Have you ever hated Navi so much you wanted to make her into a snowball?" Zelda read off of a piece of paper. Every single person turned to look at Link. "Well?" Zelda asked impatiently. "We're waiting!"
"Um…wait, what was the question? I wasn't listening…" Link said hesitantly.
Zelda gave a disgusted sigh before throwing the question at Link, "Read it yourself! The princess of destiny never repeats herself!"
"What?" Ganondorf, who was in the very back of the room, asked.
"I said the princess of destiny never repeats herself!" Zelda shrieked.
"Oh. Ok."
Meanwhile, Link was trying to read the question that had been handed to him, "Have…you……… How do you pronounce this word?"
"Oh for crying out loud, give it to me!" Midna shouted, and she then read the question out to Link.
"Oh! Well… Of course I tried to turn her into a snowball! I've tried everything to get rid of that annoying, talking fairy!" Link shouted.
"Teehee!" Navi said happily as both she and Link remembered what had happened on that fateful, cold winter's day…
Flashback:
Link and Navi were walking through Hyrule Field, returning from a long day of shopping at the Castle Market, when suddenly…it began to snow! "Hey look listen!" Navi said excitedly, pointing at all the snowflakes.
"I know, it's pretty!" Link said, still walking.
"Hey look listen!" Navi shouted, still pointing at the snow.
"I know…I saw it…" Link said, frowning at Navi before continuing the trek back home.
"Hey look listen!"
"I know! I saw!"
"Hey look listen!"
"Ok! I saw it!!" Link shouted.
"Hey look listen!"
"I KNOW!!"
"Hey look list-"
"I can't take it anymore!" Link shouted, and he dropped all of his groceries that he had been carrying before scooping up some of the snow and creating a snowball. Then he snatched Navi from the air and stuffed her inside the snowball before tossing it away from him, nodding satisfactorily as the fairy's voice got farther and farther away. Link gave a sigh of relief before retrieving his bags and turning around, only to find that Navi was right in front of him. Not only that, but she had learned how to create snowballs by watching Link make his. "Uh oh…" Link said nervously as the fairy aimed a large amount of snowballs at him.
"Hey look listen!" Navi shouted happily, and then began to cover Link in the cold snow.
End of Flashback.
"I hate snow," Link grumbled while Navi just hummed innocently and floated around his head.
"Well…that was an entertaining story, Link. Now, onwards!" Zelda shouted while Link just sat in a corner and glared at his fairy companion. "This question is for Link, from The-Saiyan-From-Hyrule: What brand of shampoo do you use?"
Once again, everyone turned to face Link. "You better have been paying attention this time!" Zelda shouted at the boy.
"I was!" Link defended himself before the princess could start throwing things at him again. "Actually, I make my own shampoo. I throw together some beetroots, some salt, some pepper, some rice, a little bit of butter, and water, and then I let it simmer for awhile before throwing it on my head!"
". . . . . . . ." said everyone.
"What?" Link asked.
"Link, that's a recipe for beetroot soup, you moron!" Zelda shouted.
"It is? Oh."
"Anyway, it's time for our first dare!"
"Muhahahaha, finally!" Ganondorf shouted excitedly. "Which of you losers is going to have to do something stupid?"
Everyone stared at the tall man.
"What?" Ganondorf asked, getting nervous.
"Uh… This dare is for Ganondorf!" Zelda said cheerfully.
"Darn! I should've seen that coming…" Ganondorf said miserably.
"Yeah, you should've," Link said casually.
"Shut up, Link! Nobody likes you!" Ganondorf snapped, not even paying attention to Zelda as she read out the dare. He was caught by surprise when suddenly Zelda held out a small drinking bowl for puppies, filled with water.
"Here you go!" She said happily.
"What am I supposed to do with this?" Ganondorf snapped.
"It's the dare! From The-Saiyan-From-Hyrule! See?" Zelda handed the man a piece of paper.
"I dare you to drink out of a puppy's water dish!?" Ganondorf read out loud. "But that's icky!"
"It's the dare, so do it!" Zelda snapped.
"Ewwwww," Ganondorf said as he grabbed the bowl with just the tips of his fingers.
"Ewwwwwwwwww," everyone else said as Ganondorf took a deep breath and then swallowed the water in just one gulp.
"Yuck yuck yuck! Somebody give me mouthwash or something!" Ganondorf screamed.
"Here, take mine!" Link shouted, tossing the man a small bottle of green liquid.
"What is it?" Ganondorf asked hesitantly, peering at the liquid.
"Oh, just my own recipe. It's got lots of peas in it, some onions, a little bit of sugar, and oil, and some cream, with just a dash of mint!" Link said proudly.
"That's pea soup!" Ganondorf shouted impatiently, but he drank it anyway. "Not bad, really…"
"Ok, let's move on!" Zelda said. "Our next question is from Sott: If the evil big owl who is annoying is there, I would like to ask him…Why are you annoying?"
"Ahha! A question for me!" shouted the owl, forcing his way between Link and Ganondorf, who were trading recipes. The giant bird waddled over to Zelda before fluffing his feathers happily. He then pouted when he reread the question. "I'm not annoying!" he protested.
"Yes you are!" Link called over.
"Fine! Hmm, why am I annoying? Good question! I don't really know why I like to annoy people, I just do! It's so much fun, seeing the look of despair on people's faces the minute they see me, and yet they know that they can't do anything about it. And if they try to skip my speech, they accidentally end up saying that they'd like me to repeat myself! Muhahaha! Would you like to hear what I said again?"
"Yes already!" Zelda shouted without realizing what she was saying. She gasped and quickly covered her mouth with her hands as the owl smiled menacingly and then repeated his speech, starting with the protest that he wasn't annoying.
Finally the owl finished again, and Link, who had more experience with the owl, quickly said that they didn't want to hear what he had said again. "Thank goodness!" Zelda shouted while everyone else gave sighs of relief. "Now, you have a dare from Sott, annoying talking owl!"
"Oooo, really?" the owl asked excitedly.
"Your dare is…Don't annoy anyone for the rest of the chapter. Ha!"
". . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ."
"Is he ok?" Saria asked as everyone stared at the shocked expression on the owl's face.
"Don't…annoy…anyone?" the owl asked, and then he promptly fainted.
"Aw that's no fun, now he can't suffer!" Zelda said with a pout. "Well anyway, since this is near the end of the chapter, we can just have him not annoy anyone for half of the next chapter too!"
"Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" the owl screamed, and then fainted again.
"Next and final dare! This one is from Starlll: I want Zelda and Link to give their Triforce shards to Ganondorf for three days. Then he (Ganon) gives them back and has to knit the WORLD'S LARGEST DOYLE!"
"Yes! Thank you!" Ganondorf said, clapping his hands gleefully as Zelda and Link pouted before handing over their Triforce pieces. "Yes! Now I have ultimate power! Muhahahahahaha!"
All the Zelda characters sighed as Ganondorf ran around the world, making everyone work for him with just minimum wages and no vacation time to speak of. During those three long days, everyone in the world was very miserable, except for Ganondorf. He spent most of his time in his newest castle, playing his giant organ and flying around in his private jet…which somehow fit into his newest castle…
Finally his three days were up, and so the man had to return the Triforce shards, along with the private jet, since he had actually stolen that from Zelda. "Now, knit the doily!" Zelda commanded, throwing some knitting needles at the man.
"Oh but, I was just about to fly to Paris and try their croissants!" Ganondorf protested sadly.
"Hey, that sounds like a good idea!" Link said cheerfully, and he and Zelda went instead, leaving Ganondorf to finish the rest of his dare.
"Stupid…dares…" Ganondorf grumbled as the sound of the needles clacking against each other filled the dark castle.
…two days later…
Link and Zelda, along with all the other Zelda characters, were enjoying a nice, relaxing ride on a gondola in Venice (well, as relaxing as one can get when everyone from the Zelda games were crammed into one tiny boat), when suddenly Ganondorf came running towards them, waving a giant doyle over his head. "I did it! The world's largest-" Before he could finish his sentence, however, he suddenly slipped and fell into the water. "Nooooooooo!" the man screamed as his creation was swept away.
"Oh well, keep working, Ganondorf!" Link called. "Come on everyone, who wants to go see the Great Pyramids!"
"Hooray!" shouted everyone else (except for Ganondorf, as he was still crying over losing the doily).
"Stupid dares!" he shouted as he began to knit all over again…
"Now then, since it's the end of the chapter, it's time for Link and Navi's game show!" Zelda said happily, and she promptly went marching off to her trailer to get her hair ready for the next chapter.
"Hey listen look!" Navi shouted excitedly.
"Ok everyone, it's time for… Who Wants to be the Owner of a Golden Rupee! (The-Saiyan-From-Hyrule kindly made the name sound better, by suggesting we use 'the Owner', instead of 'an Owner'!). And we actually have a contestant!" Link said.
"Hooray!" shouted everyone else, except for Navi, who insisted on shouting 'hey look listen' instead.
"The contestant's name is Sott!" Link announced.
"Booooo!" booed the giant, annoying owl.
"That's considered being annoying, owl!" Link warned.
"Oh no! I forgot!" the owl screamed and then ran off into the growing darkness.
"Now then, are you ready to start the show, Sott?" Link asked.
But before Sott could even respond, Navi came flying in, shouting to listen, and carrying in large game show equipment, including buzzers.
"Just press the buzzer when you know the answer!" Link said cheerfully as he handed one to Sott, and kept one for himself. "As host of the show, I've decided that I'll participate too!"
"That's cheating!" Ganondorf shouted, still trying to knit the largest doily. "You already know the answers!"
"Yeah, whatever," Link said in a bored voice. "Now then, are you ready to play…Who Wants to be the Owner of a Golden Rupee!"
"Hooray!" Everyone shouted.
"Just get on with it already!" Zelda shouted from her trailer. "You're so loud!"
"Ok…First question!
What is the Princess of Hyrule's name?
Is it… a) Princess Zelda
b) Helga Buttercup
or, c) I Like Pie!" Link said happily. Before Sott could even think about pressing the buzzer, Link instantly hit his. "I know this one! Helga Buttercup!"
"You idiot!" Zelda shouted through her trailer's window.
"Listen!" Navi shouted, and she slammed her microphone over Link's head.
While all this was going on, Sott finally got the chance to answer. "Oh! I like pie too! Yay!" Sott shouted after hitting the buzzer.
"What!? None of you know my name?! I am so quitting!" Zelda screeched, and she slammed her window shut before making a very angry call to her agent.
"Yeah, pie is great…but it looks like we both got that answer wrong…" said Link with a small pout as Navi started to hit both contestants with her microphone for being wrong. "Well anyway, next question!" Link shouted, impatiently gesturing to Navi for the piece of paper that held the questions.
Link cleared his throat before continuing, "What is the magical land from the Zelda games called? Is it…
a) Soup!
b) Hyrule
or c) Watchoutheylistenlook"
"Hey!" Navi shouted, and she instantly grabbed the buzzer from Link before the two contestants could even react. "Watchoutheylistenlook!" she screamed excitedly into the microphone.
"Oh! So sorry, that's the wrong answer!" Link said cheerfully.
"Hey!" Navi shouted angrily, and she instantly began to hit Link again, this time with a large chair.
"Oh oh oh, I so know this one!" Sott said, slamming on the buzzer continuously.
"Yeah, go ahead," Link said calmly, straightening out his tunic while Navi quickly returned the chair.
"Uhmm... Wait, I know it! Uhh... B! Yeah, b! Whatever it is…"
"Is that your final answer?" Link asked in a bored voice.
"Uh…yes?" Sott said nervously. Instantly different colored lights began to flash, and the windmill guy from Ocarina of Time began to play his song, the Song of Storms. "Woot! I got it right! Go me!" Sott shouted excitedly. As the rain water began to pour down on everyone there, Link sulkily handed Sott a Golden Rupee. "Congrats, you got half of the questions right! You get the Golden Rupee! There you go. Now in different games that's worth different amounts, sometimes it's worth five hundred rupees, and other times it's worth less… But hey! You won the game show! That should be worth something…I don't see why we have to hand out these rupees and can't just keep them… But anyway, Sott is our first winner for the show!" Link shouted, still pouting over not getting anything himself.
"Hooray!" shouted everyone else, except for Navi, who, once again, shouted something completely different, and for Zelda, who shouted to be quiet already.
"Well thanks for coming, Sott, see you around!" Link said, and he shoved the winning contestant off of the stage. "Well that's it for today's game show! If anyone else would like to enter, just let us know! We also allow people who have already been here to return, as long as we don't have any new people requesting entrance first! Anyway, thanks for watching, and goodnight…or good day, depending on where you live…or-"
"Hey!" Navi shouted, and she quickly turned off the cameras before Link could continue his long and pointless speech.
Well that's it for that chapter, what did you all think of it? Thanks again for sending in so many dares and questions, they were a lot of fun to answer!
And thanks to Sott for entering the game show! Let me know if you ever want to enter again. And if anyone else out there wants to be on the show, just say so and I'll send you the questions (which will be different next time, lol)! :-D
Anyway, thanks for reading everyone, and tell me if there was something in the chapter that you didn't like so I can change it!
