Chapter 1
One Good Shock Deserves Another
I own Nothing
"I have so many questions to ask you, I don't know where to start!" Nami said aloud, almost dancing around her blonde counterpart with a critical eye that scanned him from top to bottom. "You said your name was Naruto Uzumaki, does that mean you're related to my dad? *Gasp* Does that mean you're one of my relatives!?" She gasped as she stopped in front of him, her eyes once again glimmered with wonder and hope.
"Now Nami, one question at a time. He can't answer you when you act like that." Fair skinned women spoke up, a vexed frown wormed it's way one to her alluring features. "Sorry, my daughters always been a bit too excitable. She gets that from her father, but anyway - hello, it's a pleasure to finally meet you. My daughter's been talking about you ever since she came home tonight, my name is Min-"
"Y-You're Minami Namikaze, right?" Naruto asked, taking his eyes from his dimensional twin to notice the stunning mother of one who stood gloriously before him. As her male counterpart before her, her hair was a spiky mess of blonde, silky hair that reached the base of her neck, two long bangs framed her soft face. She wore simple clothing though it clung to her perfectly, showing off a body that most would die to have. Naruto stared absently, unaware of his eyes wondering her form. "So that's what dad would have looked like if he was a woman…..he actually makes a very pretty lady. Eww, gross, gross - get that thought out of my head!"
"Right, do I know you from somewhere?" She wondered, surprised by this stranger's knowledge.
"N-No, sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt you, it's just me and Jij- I mean Baa-chan were talking about you. She spoke highly of you." He stated quickly, his answer seeming to satisfy Minami's curiosity for now.
"Oh, okay. That's sweet of her. But you still look very familiar, though." The blonde hummed, her critical eye now scanning the boy's body just as her daughter's did seconds before, though, not as sporadic and far more focused. "...If I didn't know better, I would say you're the spitting image of my husband when he was your age. The only exception is that he had red hair, but your eyes - their spot on. How bizarre."
"His last name is Uzumaki. Maybe it's a family trait," Nami interjected, "but anyway, we have so much to talk about. Come on, let's discuss this stuff in the dining room. Mom made us a late night dinner." She stated with glee as she grabbed Naruto's arm with a vice like grip as she pulls him towards the dining area where 9 bowls of Ramen laid on the table, 7 gathered in front of a single chair (probably Nami's chair) while one rested on either side of the table where, Naruto thought, Minimai and he would sit.
"So, first things first, is your last name really Uzumaki?" Nami wondered as she took her chair right in front of the massive accumulation of ramen bowls, steaming in perfect harmony to create the perfect ramen aroma. Naruto was tempted to hurl himself towards the outer bowls and hopefully wolf them down before Nami could do anything to stop him, but he thought against it.
"Can't. Steal. Food. Must. Be. A. Good. Guest!" he thought, locking his arm down to prevent him from reaching for the steaming bowls that Nami hoards. "Y-Yeah, I guess. Why do you ask?"
"Haven't you heard, Uzumaki's are practically extinct. There're you and half of me, other than that they can't find a single one. My dad was the last full-blooded one." She explained, digging into her waiting bowls like a starved wolf into a dead carcass. Naruto would have said it was disgusting if only he wasn't guilty of doing the same damn thing when he was craving his favorite food, which is practically every day.
"W-Well, I really don't know if I'm full blooded. I'm an orphan, I didn't know my parents." He lied, partially anyway. He figured that Nami and her mother really wouldn't believe him if he tried to explain his whole story to them like he did with Sarutobi. In time, he might explain the whole thing but now was not that time. "All that I was told about myself was that my parents died in a horrible accident and they named me Naruto Uzumaki."
"Awe, you poor baby!" Minami sniffled, knowing all too well the feeling of being a child of the state. "Were you at least given a good home?"
"Not really, I was kicked out of the village's orphanage at the age of 6. Thankfully, an old man gave me a home - he reminds me a lot of Baa-chan, I think that's why I keep trying to call her Jiji. The apartment wasn't anything to sneeze at, but it was the only thing I could call home." He lied once more, though he noticed it was coming a bit more gradually to him that it was a few minutes ago, something he wasn't that proud of. He's never been much of a liar, even when he was in trouble he always took responsibility for is actions (mostly so no one would try and take credit for his "amazing" pranks).
"What type of monster would throw out a 6 year old child?! I hope that person gets what's coming to them!" Nami declared righteously. "Do you know why they kicked you out?"
"N-Nope, not at all. It just happened one day." His facade was beginning to waver as he pulled at his tattered pants nervously under the table. "Trust me, I was just as mad as you were. Well - sadder than anything, but I was still pretty furious."
"This old man, what was his name? He must have been quite the character to be so kind to pay for your apartment. I'd love to meet him someday." Minami smiled, trying to speak about the positive side of Naruto's past rather than dwell on his abandonment from both his parents and the orphanage system like her daughter seemed to be doing. She loved her daughter to death, but there are times where she worries that Nami just doesn't understand social educate and grace.
"His name was Hiruzen, and umm, you can't - h-he's dead," he said with a mix of sadness and relief. With Hiruzen's passing it helped keep the Namikaze family from sniffing around his past all too much but it also means that Naruto had just used one of the most emotional moments in his young life as a well-placed excuse. "What type of bastard am I?" He thought to himself.
"What?! Oh no, I'm so sorry. Here I am, bring up things you probably don't want to be reminded of. I'm so sorry." She pleaded, saddened at the idea that she just couldn't stop bring up his most hated memories. "What type of host am I?" she thought to herself.
"It's alright, really, I was 13 when it happened, I've had time to heal. But enough about me, I'd love to learn more about the people I'm staying with." He said quickly, hoping to shift the attention off him for a moment. "Also, thank you very much for letting me stay here. It means a lot to me,"
"Oh, you're too sweet," she said kindly, dapping her lips with a napkin to clean the broth of her delicious confection from her mouth. "And you don't have to thank us, without you I don't think my little Nami would be here tonight - we both owe you tremendously."
"And without you, I wouldn't be a fully recognized Kunoichi either! Wahoo!" Nami shouted with vigor, running her thumb across the headband so proudly worn on her forehead, prepared to work her heart and soul out to reach her goal, to surpass her mother and father to become the next Hokage.
"Wait, how old are you?" Naruto wondered.
"16 years old, about to turn 17 in a few months." Said Nami simply, still messaging the cool metal of her headband with her thumb.
"It took you until you were 16 to become a genin?!" Naruto asked, shocked and astounded at this realization. Was this version of him even more terrible than he was? How could you fail that many times? "It must have been embarrassing to be in a class with children 3 years your junior." He thought before he brought his attention back to the real world to listen to what Nami had to say for herself.
"Yeah, what's the big deal? We all start at 13 and end usually around 16/17 depending."She said, staring at her guest with a questioning gaze which was mirrored by Minami. "Why is that so weird?"
"Cause…...well, I've never been to a ninja village so I really didn't know how your system works. I never went to school….I learned my techniques on the road….yeah, that's it." He lied again, and with every lie he spoke he felt like he was digging himself a deeper hole in which to bury himself in. "But anyway, enough about that. Can you tell me more about how your school system works?"
"You are terrible at lying." Kurama snickered; Naruto could only imagine that if he did have a physical body he would be flashing his sharp, pearly whites at him for this pathetic display.
"I can't help it, I'm drowning out here! I've never really lied for this long before," he thought with a sigh.
"Why don't you tell the truth?" He snickered once more, seemingly enjoying his former container's embarrassment.
"Oh yeah, cause that totally worked out well with Sarutobi. She thought I was crazy, I still think she does." His sarcasm was not lost on the gigantic, non-existent, furball that dwelled with the recesses of his mind.
The beast sighed, "Fine, do what you think is right. Either way - I'm getting a good show."
"Real supportive, buddy. Real supportive."
"Well, it's not that hard to explain," Nami said, tapping her 7th empty bowl of ramen with her chopsticks - wondering if she wanted another, a question that everyone knew the answer too. "Usually, you start the Academy when you're 13. You must take an entrance exam before you're even allowed into the school. It's the basic stuff even a toddler would know like common history, checking your chakra levels, etc. but it helps keep out those who would be wasting the Academy's time. Now, usually Clan kids and the more highly ranked ninja families pass, while a few councilor children and civilian kids barely skate by. After that, there're three stages."
"One is the first year students who learn more advanced history, how to use their chakra, and the simple three techniques required to pass your first year - the Kawarimi no Jutsu, Bunshin no Jutsu, and Henge no Jutsu."
"Next would be the Second year where we focus more on chakra control and what elemental chakra is. At the end of this year, you have to be able to climb a tree with just your feet, walk on water, and at least tap into your elemental chakra."
"And finally, the third year focused solely on two things - elemental chakras and jutsus, with D-ranked missions helping us understand what it meant to take on missions. For our final test, we are given 4 weeks off of school to find and learn an elemental Jutsu and at least be able to perform it in front of the class. Most Clan heads or high-level kunoichi's children had no problem finding a Jutsu or two - and if you didn't have the means to find you a Jutsu, Ikuko and Misuzu would provide one for you."
"Good god, that is some extensive work. I'm actually kind of jealous, if I had that type of learning system I don't think I would have been the weakling I was for so long back in the day." Naruto thought with a pang of envy wiggling its way through his mind. "That's amazing. I had no idea you ninja's went through so much work just to reach the level of Gennin. I bet a Jounin is off the freaking charts in terms of skill."
"Damn straight, just ask my mom! She's the best Jounin you could find in the village." Nami boasted, proud of her mother's standings as a fellow Kunoichi. If anyone deserved praise for her accolades it would have to be Minami Namikaze, or as her enemies call her before they feel the sweet embrace of death, Konoha no Kiiroi Senkō (Konoha's Yellow Flash).
"Nami, you know how I feel about you cursing!" She said firmly, her brow furrowing at her daughter's slur. "And I wouldn't go that far, there's very many talented Jounin out there - like Kim or Mighty Gin and Isume is practically a prodigy. Making Jounin at 20 years old."
"True, they're all great, but none of them could hold a candle to the 'Yellow Flash' herself. I mean, come on, you've made not one but two jutsus, one being a solid A ranked Jutsu and the other a strong S. You've also fought in two wars and survived the Kyuubi attack. Who could top that?" Nami said loudly, bringing a bright blush to her mother's face.
"Nami, could you tone it down please, you're making me blush." Minimai said tentatively, "M-My accomplishments are good and all….but can we please talk about something else." Unknown to most, Minimai is terrible at dealing with complements. Something about someone praising you unequivocally makes her feel very odd which makes her burst into a blush and stammered like a mid-year girl at the Academy. Most of her enemies would buckle with laughter at the sight of the famed Konoha no Kiiroi Senkō quivering under such minor praise, which is why it's one of the Namikaze's most treasured secrets. Well, that and it would be embarrassing for people to find out.
"Wait, then how did you fail your final exam, Nami? With a mom like yours and your…..energy, I thought you would have Aced that exam." Naruto chimed in, even more curious about this dimension than ever before. Personally, Naruto thought that he would have done much better in the Academy if he had some familiar structure back at home, he wouldn't have had such a drive to pull pranks and skip classes, or at least that's what he thought at the time.
"...Well, in all honesty, I wasn't the best student in the world. But I still wasn't failing, and I worked my ass off to try and get that stupid jutsu Misuzu gave me to work, but the wording was so confusing and some of the steps contradicted the previous ones." She said, unaware of her mother's furrowed brow at another slur "slipping" into her daughter's conversation. "So, I failed the final test. That's when Misuzu came to me and told me about this other 'secret' test only used for special cases. Turns out, Misuzu purposely gave me a faulty Jutsu - designed to be unusable so she could trick me into giving her that scroll." Nami's features sunk, disheartened at the very idea that she was tricked by such a foolish prospect. A test for special cases, who's ever heard of such a thing? And she should have known it was a lie once she was told to steal from the Hokage. The Hokage would never sanction such a foolish test, especially if it dealt with one of the biggest artifacts in the Hokage's position, but, she thought, hindsight is 20/20.
"I'd wish you would have brought that jutsu scroll to me, I would have told you it was a fake." Her mother said matter-of-factly, the defult tone of any mother.
"I wanted to do it on my own" Nami said bluntly, playing with a few left over noodles that rested at the bottom of the bowl. "I just wanted to know that I could do something like that on my own. Besides, it worked out for the best anyway. Everything turned out alright and I'm now a fully-fledged Genin!" Her tone soon shifted from bummed too thrilled as she brandished her headband with pride, which brought a smirk to her mother's angelic face once more.
"Speaking of which, I believe it's past your bedtime," she said simply, standing from the table to gather the dishes.
"What? I-I haven't had a bed time in years!" Nami said, flabbergasted at her mother's statement, especially in front of their guest. "I don't want him to think of me as a child!" She thought, though, confused on why she even cared what he thought about her.
"You need your rest, you don't want to oversleep and miss team placements now do you?" She questioned sweetly, even though Nami knew far too well that it was more of a statement.
"I would never oversleep," Nami said stubbornly, folding her arms in a childish manner. If she had puffed out her cheeks, she would have reminded Naruto of how he looked every time he was told to apologize to those he brutally prank in his past life, it actually brought a smile to his face.
"Oh really?" Nami nods definitely, "then I guess our new guest would love to hear how you slept in so late that you rushed out the door, completely forgetting to put regular clothes on. She ran outside with nothing but her orange panties and a-." But the mother's story was cut short by her daughter's sudden jump from her chair, breaking the eye contact of both Minami and Naruto.
"Goodnight mom!" Nami yelled, rushing to her room with a fierce blush coloring her cheeks. After her abrupt departure, the two remaining blondes decided it would be best to get some shut eye as well, Naruto electing to sleep on their couch. Grabbing some old sheets and a fluffy throw pillow, Naruto was ready to get some much-needed rest.
"Wait, Naruto," Minami called out, standing in the door frame of her bedroom - dressed in a red see-through nightgown that, for lack of a better word, was not something Naruto was prepared to see. "You don't want to sleep in that, do you? I think I have something that can fit you."
"T-Thank you, Namikaze-san," he said nervously, quickly diverting his eyes from her retreating backside to the linoleum flooring. "I keep forgetting how nasty my clothes are."
"How did the get so mangled, if I may ask? It looks like you've been through a war." She asked as she rummaged through her husband's old dresser, being delicate with his clothes as usual.
"You have no idea." He thought with a knowing chuckle. "I've been traveling a lot - I get into a lot of crazy things. They've just warned out over time." He lied though this time it didn't seem to weigh on him as much as the other one's did. "I suppose I should just get used to it," He thought before he notice Minami walking his direction, still draped in her see-through negligee. "Think of something else, think of something else!" He wailed in his mind as the image of his gender swapped father now dressed in a sexy red nightgown was burned deep into his memory.
"Oh, okay," she said sweetly, handing him a simple red, sleeveless T with a flannel pair of thin pajama bottoms. "Well, here you go. It's my husband's old pajamas from back in the day - he was a bit of a pack rat." She said with a giggle, remembering all the times she's found old toy's from his younger years still packed in his closet.
"Thank you, it means a lot to me," Naruto said with a smile, trying to keep full, unwavering eye contact with the Namikaze Matriarch so his eyes would not wander south towards her bountiful bosoms.
Minami smiled and turned to leave, only for her to speak once more. "Oh, and one more thing," she said, before pulling the battered boy into a warm, loving hug. It lasted a minute but to Naruto, it felt like a lifetime - it was such a wonderful feeling to be held with such care and tenderness, it was truly a mother's hug. Though, Naruto's cheeks were burning at his proximity to Minami's pink and tantalizing flesh. "Thank you so much for saving my daughter. She's my little baby girl, I wouldn't know what to do with myself if I had lost her."
"N-No problem, I just did what needed to be done," he said dumbfounded at the sudden show of affection, but he couldn't say it wasn't welcomed. He always wanted something like this, a sweet and loving hug that wasn't motivated by pity or someone's own agenda, and it meant the world to him to have it.
"No, you did much more." She cooed softly, "Nami told me everything you said - you stood up for my girl, I won't forget that. That's why you'll always be welcome here. This is your home for as long as you need it."
-The next Day-
The morning came rather early for a certain blonde who was now running full speed out of the house, leaving Naruto to his slumber for an extra hour or two before he needed to meet the Third at the hospital. Once he woke, he was given a pair of pants and a red long sleeve shirt from Minami, "You need to be presentable for the Hokage," she said as she let him use the guest bathroom to change and freshen up. Soon, Naruto was off, refreshed and prepared to take this new world head on.
It took him a bit to find the hospital as it seems that even the buildings weren't the same as his dimension. Every street corner was peppered with different buildings that he has never seen before or may of the buildings he did know were moved to different locations. Thankfully, after talking to several store owners and passersby, he found the hospital he was looking for. Now, he remembered his hospital being quite large, enough to fit a good amount of people in it, but compared to this one - his dimension's was a hut made out of mud and sticks. It was so state of the art and the scope of the building outside was so big. 'Gotta thank that Fourth Hokage for that' a passer-by said after Naruto stood there, gawking at the tall structure for a little bit too long for comfort.
Soon, he entered and was quickly whisked away by a male nurse to an empty room where he was greeted by a pretty yet familiar face. "Hello, my name is Katsu Yakushi and I'll be your doctor today. So, what seems to be the problem today?" She asked with a smile. The doctor's hair was a bright white wrapped in a single ponytail in the back while circular glasses hid her sharp onyx eyes behind them. A doctor's lab coat was draped across her figure as under it was a jounin vest and simple shinobi pants, revealing her status as both a doctor and a highly trained ninja. "Tonsillitis? Appendicitis? Prostate check?"
"What?!"
"Haha, relax - relax, it's just a little doctor humor. I didn't mean to scare you." She smiled, a smile that reminded Naruto of someone he used to know, a slimy little snake in the grass. "The Hokage contacted me yesterday, told me all about it. It's just a normal checkup and blood work. It'll be over in five minutes, tops."
"Oh, s-sorry. I'm just not that crazy about hospitals." He chuckled nervously, ushered to the hospital bed that rested in one of the corners by the spectacled doctor.
"Oh, and why's that?" She wondered, gathering her supplies for this basic check up and placing them down next to Naruto on a metallic tray, ready to go to work.
"Bad experiences. 9 times out of 10 I wake up in a hospital room, confused and delirious." He said as she puts the buds of her stethoscope in her ears and brings the circular head to his now bare back, asking him to breath in deeply then slowly out through the mouth and repeat until she tells him to stop.
"Really? What lands you in the hospital so frequently?" She asked, tapping a few of his bruises with her gloved fingers, eliciting a gasp from her patient. "I'm guessing you're a fighter?"
"I guess you could say that." He smiled, "Why exactly is the Hokage asking for all of this to be done, anyway?"
"I don't know, I didn't ask her. Mostly, when you hear your leader give you an order - you don't really ask why." She said as they continued forward with the mundane portion of the physical. She ran through all the basics, reflexes, vision, heart rate, and blood pressure, but now came the final test. Unfortunately for Naruto, the last one was always the most uncomfortable. "Alright, I'm going to have to ask you to drop your pants."
"Haha, very funny. You got me once, shame one me - you can't pull that same trick on me again." He laughed, slipping his arms through his sleeves, prepared to leave soon after.
"I'm dead serious," she said, her usual light-hearted expression turned coldly serious in 3.5 seconds, putting Naruto a little on edge. "Have you never had a physical?"
"Nope, never had the need too. I've been healthy as a horse - well, except for the few times my 'fights' didn't go over so well. But other than that, I've never had a single physical. Why do you ask?" He answered truthfully. Thanks to Kurama he's never really needed a reason to be in the hospital for anything other than chakra exhaustion or deadly sever injuries. So, healthy as a horse was pretty much accurate, though, he has noticed his cuts and bruises from his final fight of his life still seemed to linger a bit longer than in previous battles. "Maybe it's because of the severity of the battle?" He thought.
"Well, after I take your blood pressure, check all your vitals, and your temperature - you usually have to drop your pants and let me…..how do I put this…" she said, a dust of pink crept onto her cheeks. Surprisingly, this one patient's made Katsu blush for the first time in a very long time. Maybe it was his innocence, how unaware he was of what was to come. Other men and women alike that she has done these mandatory physicals on usual know the score. Other's who've witnessed or experienced it first hand would usually pass this knowledge along to the poor unfortunately people who were next, but it seems that no one was kind enough to do so with Naruto. She cleared her throat and pushed her spectacles back onto the bridge of her nose, "check out your package."
"Check my….." He grew deadly silent, staring intently at his doctor with an absent stare - but soon the dusty wheels in his mind began to turn, bringing him to one single question. "What?! What type of sick physical is this?"
"No, no, no. I'm checking for a hernia. It's completely normal." She clarified, her pink cheeks grew into a deeper, rosier red. The volume of his voice echoed through the hospital, alerting many people to his proclamation.
"How is playing with my nuts normal?!" He yelled once more, catching the attention of many passersby who, thankfully, ignored his screams and continued on their merry way.
Quickly she shot from her spot and slammed her office door shut, leaning on it as she turned to see her patients high - strung features. "I'm not playing with them, trust me," She said, lowering her voice to a soothing whisper. "I'm just going to cup them and tell you to cough, it will only take five seconds. I swear," she left her spot at the door and took her set in front of the nervous blonde. They sat in silence for quite some time, Naruto's eyes constantly shifting across the room as to not make eye contact with the beauty before him who just asked him to drop his pants. With a heavy sigh, Naruto slide from the bed and slowly reached for his trousers with a nervous gulp. His blush grew ten shades darker the lower his trousers and boxers dropped. Soon, the boy's pants and underwear were draped across his ankles, leaving his male member fully exposed to the wide open air.
Now Katsu was a respectable doctor so Naruto was very thankful that she kept her thoughts to herself about his exposed man sausage, seeing as this is the first time he's ever shown a female his flesh light he was a bit self-conscious. I suppose you could say it was best he hadn't shown it off too much, cause if Katsu's racy thoughts were anything to go by, he would be beating off every single woman in Konoha with a stick. Her composure was commendable, not every person could be eye level with a healthy, girthy member and keep a straight face, let alone keep her face completely pink free but Katsu rocked it like a champ and continued her job with little to no problems to speak of - at least, that's what she was hoping would happen.
"Katsu-chan, may I com-" The door to Katsu's office sprung open, revealing a tall drink of water with glowing yellow eyes. "Oh, hello! Am I interrupting something?" A voice cried out at the door. Naruto snapped his head towards the newcomer and quickly covered his family jewels with whatever he could find - a pillow would suffice for now. The voice in question was attached to a tall figure with soft, graceful features - features that would seem to be for a much younger teenage girl than a well developed woman such as herself. Her skin-tone was pale but it held a slight glow to it, giving it a more lite - creamy tone. Black markings rested around her eyes like makeup but with a thickness that reminded Naruto a bit of war paint. Her hairstyle of choice was a high ponytail, allowing two locks to frame either sides of her face. She wore a simple black kimono with a high collar and a dark-blue long-sleeved haori over it, which was held closed by a sash and a rope belt, showing off the voluptuous curves only a seasoned woman could have. (If you want a clear image of her, it's Orochimaru in Naruto Gaiden)
"Please darling," She cooed at Naruto's quant attempts to cover his modesty. "It's not the first time I've seen one. If you've lived as long as I have, nudity looses it's charm. Though, I have to say, nice di-"
"Lady Orochimaru - not that I'm always happy to see you, can I ask why you're here?" Katsu asked, a bit miffed at her master's sudden arrival but a faint smile could still be seen etching its way onto her features at her presence.
"I was asked by Lady Hokage to retrieve the results personally, but apparently I've caught you at a bad time. Or good, depending on your preference." Lady Orochimaru smiled, her eyes dancing over the boy's exposed bottom half, though, she was disappointed that she couldn't get the full picture.
"Can you please stop looking at me like that," Naruto begged, at the moment his mind could only picture that sadistic male snake Orochimaru leering at his half naked form, not the obviously attractive female viper that ogled him now.
"Take it as a compliment, dear. Not many bodies have ever caught my eye." To her credit, she wasn't lying. Though she hasn't been trying to look for delicious male bodies, she would be lying if Naruto's hasn't brought out a bit more of a younger, less-renowned, perverse side of her.
"Um, Lady Orochimaru - I think this would go a whole lot faster if you would step outside for a moment." Katsu sighed, hoping that her sensei would listen to her this one time.
"No, it would go faster if our blonde friend here would remove the pillow from his little soldier. But I suppose calling it little would be false advertising." She said, once again running a shiver down Naruto's spine, which brought an even larger smile to her face. Who would have thought she would have such fun with this unknown dimension hopper. Her appearance here was not solely on the Hokage's orders, her curiosity of this new face was too strong to leave it alone - she wished to fill him out herself and from what she can tell, physically he's not half bad. However, Lady Orochimaru is not one to base everything solely on his attractive appearance, so she might need to get him alone in the future to do a thorough inspection of his motives.
Katsu turned to her patient and, with wavering smile, began to speak, "Naruto, could you please-" but her plan was soon dashed by Naruto's abrupt interjection.
"Are you serious?! You talk me into dropping my pants to play with my package and now you want me to let you do it with your creepy friend watching in the corner? What type of hospital is this!?" He questioned once more, holding the pillow tighter to his groan - fearful that her creepy friend could possibly see through cloth and feathers.
"I resent that - is it creepy to admire a human body? I don't think so. Think of it as nothing more than a young, healthy female admiring a man's form." She articulated with words like silver, but her wicked tongue did nothing to ease Naruto's embarrassment. Not just one, but two women have seen Naruto Jr. In the span of 4 minutes, and it's not even lunch time yet!
"You're not helping," Katsu declared through gritted teeth. "I'm sorry, I wouldn't be asking you to do this under any other circumstances but….Lady Orochimaru won't budge once she's set her mind on something."
"She's right~." Lady Orochimaru sang, locking eyes with the blonde boy who, right now, was at a loss for words.
"So let's just get this over with."
Naruto, now thoroughly red, let out a bitter sigh. "...Fine," he said, his cheeks burning with color as the pillow slipped from his grip, revealing his meat slab to the public eye. He looked to the medicine cabinet just to make sure he wouldn't possibly make eye contact with the perverse snake. "But can you tell her to keep her comments to herself?"
"She will, right Lady Orochimaru?" Katsu asked firmly, making sure there was little room for interpretation or misunderstandings with her teacher's behavior.
"I suppose I could keep quiet for a little bit - since you asked so nicely, Katsu-chan." Lady Orochimaru sighed, "Such a pity," she thought, her arms folded under her bust, "I had far more quips to say."
"Alright," slipping on a fresh pair of blue gloves, Katsu continued the physical without any further delays. Soon the job was done, Naruto pulled his pants back up - making sure to aim his toned butt away from Lady Orochimaru, and they were preparing for the final portion of this whole thing, the blood work. "See, it wasn't so bad was it?" Katsu asked, preparing her needle.
"I enjoyed it." Lady Orochimaru snickered, slipping her forked tongue from her mouth to moisten her lips.
"I'm never going to get a physical ever again." Naruto shivered as he presented his forearm to his doctor, hoping to get this done as soon as possible. Katsu took three samples of his blood and Orochimaru generously offered to take them down to the labs with the other notes and, to Naruto'sgraditude, Katsu agreed. Lady Orochimaru took her leave, leaving both Katsu and Naruto alone.
"I'm sorry about Lady Orochimaru, she can get like that sometimes." Katsu groaned, placing many of her medical supplies back in their proper place while Naruto, still not in the best of moods, leaned against the frame of the office door, looking out into the hallway with a thousand-yard stare. "She's really nice, I swear. It's just….she's never really knows how to act around new people."
Naruto remained silent, his mind still racked with the unrelenting stare of Katsu's eerie sensei. Though Lady Orochimaru is a far cry away from Lord Orochimaru, she still knows how to send an uncomfortable chill down his spine. He couldn't help but replay the words she'd spoken about his….tool and blush at the mere thought of it all. "What do you mean?" He finally asked, hoping to find something else to keep his mind of what just happened.
"Well, to her followers, she is kind and generous. To me; she's fun and playful but can be stern when she needs to be. However, with new people, I don't know. She just messes with them, I can't put my finger on why she does it, though. I've never seen her act the way she did with you, though - that was new," She explained, placing the final role of medical tape away in her draw. "Maybe you've brought out a whole new side of Lady Orochimaru we've never seen before."
"Let's hope not," he said, as a thought came to his mind. "The only person I know who would be that forward with someone she barely knew was Anko. Mostly because she got some sick enjoyment out of embarrassing people." "You have a lot of respect for her, don't you?" He said, remembering how formal Katsu was with Orochimaru and how respectful she was in her presence.
"Of course I do, she taught me everything I know. And the sacrifice she's making for this village, I couldn't have anything but respect for her." Said Katsu, a noticeable flutter in her tone. If anyone even knew the name of Katsu you would know she is devoted, utterly so, to Lady Orochimaru and her cause and nothing could ever shake her resolve.
"Sacrifice?" He wondered, turning to face his white-haired doctor.
"You don't know?" She asked getting a shake from Naruto. "She's given up her aging to live forever and protect Konoha. She's practically learned every jutsu Konoha has to offer, in a few more years she might be stronger than even the Hokage. All of this to protect our village." She answered, giving the blonde a much more played down version of the extensive process of Lady Orochimaru's mortality.
"So many things have changed, I'm actually surprised that I keep getting surprised." Naruto thought as he bit back a sly remark which dealt with his previous Orochimaru. "So, Lady Orochimaru….is a selfless hero?"
"You better believe it. From orphan to the ageless hero of Konoha, pretty impressive right?" She stated with a sparkle in her eye as she seemed ready to boast Lady Orochimaru's praise from the rooftop. "And to think, she picked me out of countless others to be her apprentice. Who would have thought."
"Wait…...the white hair, the circle glasses…..Kabuto?! Holy fuck…..why are guys making pretty girls? That's just weird!?" Most people would think that Naruto would be used to such realizations by now, but unfortunately, it's still very, VERY odd to see friends and even a few enemies as incredibly attractive females. "What do you mean by that?" He asked, keeping his thoughts on the sexy doctor deep in his subconscious where it belonged. "Just remember, you think Kabuto is sexy. REMEMBER THAT!" The Bijuu holwed, Naruto's empty mindscape echoing with the sound of Kurama's laughter.
"For the longest time, Lady Orochimaru didn't wish to take anyone under her wing. She will be living for quite some time and she has learned it would be best to try and not form attachments. But, one day when I came to her - weeks after my parent's funeral, she offered me an apprenticeship. She said she saw a lot of potential in me, and I've pushed myself every day to make sure the potential she saw in me never went to waste." She said proudly from her office.
"I thought Kabuto wasn't born from here?" He thought. "So you're a born here and your family followed behind Orochimaru?"
"Oh no, my family and I were wanderers after the war took our home," she said absentmindedly, unfazed by her proclamation. Being a simple wanderer for a part of her childhood never bothered her as much as it did others, she actually enjoyed it. Many different sights and sounds, though, losing her home did put a damper on some of it, but most of her family's adventures through the elemental nations easied some of the pain."Thankfully, Konoha allowed us to take refuge in their village. We soon gravitated towards Lady Orochimaru, we felt at peace under her watchful gaze - unfortunately, my family was killed during a mission that went horribly wrong. That's when I really started to focus on my skills as a medical-nin, I wanted to make my parents proud - they always said that their daughter could become the next Tsubasa Senju. Lady Orochimaru saw it too." She said, finishing up her round up supplies and made her way out into the hall.
"I'm sorry for your lose," he said, moving from his spot in the door frame so the doctor could shut her office.
"It's alright, it happened so long ago," She said, slipping a key from her coat pocket, lock her office, and place it back once more.
"So, you were the only apprentice ever to be trained under Lady Orochimaru?" He asked, hoping to switch the mournful subject that he accidently brought up. It brought a small smile to his features as he thought how funny it was that Orochimaru was something he would bring up to avoid something like this. What strange times he lives in.
Her simple smile left her painted lips for a fraction of a second, if you blind you would have missed it. She pressed her glasses back onto the ridge of her nose, "yes, the only one." Her smile soon returned as she released the knob of her office door and turned to the blonde with a question dancing in her eyes. "Well, the tests won't be done for about an hour or two and you were my last patient before my break. Do you want to grab something to eat? My treat."
"I didn't have breakfast, so...sure, why not. Got any place in mind?" He asked, but he was already sold on the lunch date thanks to Katsu's generosity.
"Come on, I'll show you. It's my favorite joint in the village."
-Akimichi Barbeque-
"Akimichi Barbeque, hmm? I wouldn't peg you as a barbecue fan." He said, staring at the carved Kenji of the "Akimichi" that hung high on the building's archway. Once again, another well-known building of Naruto's dimension is swapped for a better and bigger version. The building was massive, housing thousands of seats for people to choose from and the kitchen, that was the biggest part of this joint. Countless chefs and waiters/waitresses zoomed through the building, delivering orders with speeds an Akimichi was never supposed to reach.
"It's my guilty pleasure," Katsu said with a smile as she walked through the dining area looking for a spot to seat. The place was packed especially at lunch time. But, thankfully, the found a table and was swarmed by a robust waiter almost immediately who carried two menu's for the couple to pursue. As the two read over their menus, Naruto notices a group of people in the corner booth sporting some very similar hairstyles. Seconds later, almost like clockwork, the same round waiter appeared, sporting a pen and pad.
"Are you two ready to order?" He questioned, a curious smile brandished on his face.
"Yes, I'll have the Akimichi special and a glass of water." Katsu said without delay, this wasn't her guilty pleasure for nothing.
"And for you, sir?" The Akimichi waiter turned to the blonde who's eyes were still transfixed on the familiar hairstyles that sat feet from him. "Sir?" He asked once more, catching Naruto's attention.
"Oh, um, yeah what she's having, I guess," He said absentmindedly, handing off his menu along with Katsu, unwilling to peel his eyes off of the four manned booth mere feet from him.
Katsu notices his distraction and turned to follow his gaze, "do you know those girls?"
"Hmmm? Oh, no I don't. It's just, they look familiar." He said, "Do you know who they are by any chance?"
"Well, if I had to guess, that would be one of the new genin teams. They just had team placements today," She said as she peered past her booth into theirs with a critical eye. "The blonde on the left I think is Inoichi Yamanaka - the first male Yamanaka set to take over the Yamanaka clan. Next to her is Chiyo Akimichi - daughter of this establishment's owner and the one next to her is Shiomi Nara - recorded to be one of the most laziest Nara in the history of the Academy. I'm guessing the final one is their sensei - oh, I'm surprised to see Asumi Sarutobi was talked into being a sensei this year." As Katsu began to list off their names one by one, Naruto's eyes scanned the group to find any likenesses to his male counterparts back home.
The first Katsu listed off, Inoichi Yamanaka, was the spitting image of a younger Inoichi, the deceased leader of the Yamanaka clan back in his world. Inoichi had long ash blond hair that reached his back, which he seemed to spiky on top and ending in a long ponytail. He had strong blue-green eyes and even stronger facial features, which included a well-defined jaw line. Next to him was a rather fetching woman who Naruto couldn't believe was the female version of Choji. With a long, spiky mane of brown hair, Chiyo Akimichi is what most would call a full woman with some curves. Thanks to her families interesting ability to transform calories into chakra, most Akamichi's pride themselves in their weight, but it seems that Chiyo's weight didn't manifest too much in her stomach, thighs, or arms. The majority was sectioned off in her bountiful bust and ASSets, but even though most of it was placed in those two spots, she still wasn't what most would consider "thin". Her body held some heft to it, but it was transferred through her body in just the right way to give her a little warmth and curves. Her cheeks carried the signature swirls Naruto has come to know about the Akimichi, and her lively and sweet eyes still shined with the innocence of his favorite gorging buddy.
On the other side of the table was the two people Naruto was more than happy to see. Shikamaru Nara's laid back stare seemed to be a Nara trait because Shiomi carried it like a pro. Under her hanging eyelashes were an ocean of chocolate brown. Her hair was done up in a high pony-tail that spiked like the head of a pineapple. Her face was soft with the very distinct hue of blush powdered on her cheeks. Apparently, this Nara wasn't so deterred by the concept of make-up.
Finally was the chain-smoking Jounin himself, or rather, herself. Asumi Sarutobi didn't seem too different from her male counterpart, her tom-boy slouch and a cigarette dangling from her lips was a practical point for point remake of Asuma's. She was a tall woman, with brown eyes, olive skin, and short black spiky hair, but, thankfully, the beard was absent from her beautiful features. Her clothing consisted of the standard Konoha ninja uniform with the sleeves rolled up half way, flak jacket, regular shinobi sandals and forehead protector. She also wore a sash that had the kanji for "Fire" (火) marked on it around her waist, a pair of black bangles, and bandages wrapped around the arms of her sleeves.
"Another set of men turned into women. Wait, Ino is a male in this world. So, does that mean that….maybe not everyone is a woman?" He thought to himself as he gave the group one more look. "Wow, you really know your stuff. How do you know all this?"
"I like to be informed. An ignorant Kunoichi is a dead Kunoichi." She said, proud of her encyclopedic knowledge of many, MANY things in the borders of Konoha, and a few things beyond the borders as wel.
"Hey, I was wondering, why did you ask me out to eat?" He asked, breaking himself from his girl scoping to ask a question he's had on his mind the moment the left the hospital. "I'm guessing you don't do this with every patient you fondle up."
She laughed, muffling its loudness with her palm. "Well, the Hokage didn't tell me much about you except that you were new to the village, and I know from experience how it feels to be the new person on the block. It's practically overwhelming at first, all these new faces, new buildings - it can get pretty paralyzing. So, I guess what I'm trying to say is - I want to put you at ease about this village and also to say that if you need anyone to talk to, anyone at all, just find me. Alright?"
He smiled at her hospitality, "alright, thank you." As their food arrived, a silence returned to the group as they dug into the perfectly cooked barbecue pork. Though the silence was welcomed, another questioned picked at Naruto's mind. He wiped his face clean of the sauce and asked, "If you don't mind me asking, do you know any more about those girls over there?"
"Why, do you have a crush on them?" She smirked.
"N-No, I would just like to know more about the people in Konoha, that's all - and who's better to ask than you, seeing as you know everything there is to know about this place." He said without delay, hoping to put to rest that silly joke. The shock of gender bent men and women is still fresh in his mind and even considering dating or crushing on them was something he couldn't bare at this moment in time.
"I wouldn't say that…..but it doesn't hurt to be knowledgeable." She said with a nod. "Alright, for starters - Inoichi is rumored to be the co-creator of the "Uchiha girls fan club". A 12 member group who follow around and practically harass three members of the Uchiha clan - Sasuki, Isume, and Shizue Uchiha. It's creepy and it gives a bad name to the Shinobi of this village - at least that's my belief. He was an average student but an average student is a failing student in the eyes of the Academy. He was far to focused on the Uchiha trio to make any decent headway. Basically, he skidded out of the Academy by the skin of his teeth. Next is Chiyo, a strong member of the Akimichi clan but is a bit down on herself, especially her physical appearance - which is odd, seeing as practically her whole clan's fighting style is based on their size. But even though she seems to have some body image problems, she is the sweetest person you will ever meet….well, except when you mention her….. s-she hates people talking about her…..ummm, well you know what I mean - I've seen several people in our E.R. for discussing her...ASSets and bust." She said, emphasizing the ass in assets.
"You really are chalk full of information." He said with a smirk, some things change and other's stay the same, that's all he could really ask for.
"I try," She said with a cocky smirk, her sarcasm dripping from her words. "The other two are pretty easy to explain. The Nara is just like her mother, lazy to the very end - but what she lacks in vigor or energy she makes up for in her massive intellect. I've heard that Shiomi purposely lowers her grades and if you've ever played Shiogi with her, you would know she wasn't stupid. And finally, we come to Asumi - the only daughter of the Third Hokage. She's known for her close range style of fighting and using her two trench knives like brass knuckles. From what I've heard she's very laid back, making sure not to bother herself with things she doesn't have to do. She's also a chain smoker and is great friends with another reported sensei, Kuro Yuhi."
"Thank you, who knew I would come out of this lunch learning some new things and new people." He said as the knowledge of his old friend's attitude's seemed well intact was tucked away in his mind.
"I aim to please," she giggled, "fun fact, though - Asumi and Kuro have been rumored to be dating."
"Really?" He questioned, which she nodded too. "I didn't know you were a gossip too, Katsu."
"Hey, gossip can also be information too, especially if it's true." She laughed lightly.
"Well, is it?" He wondered though he was very much aware of the answer.
"I don't know. Personally - I don't think so, Kuro isn't the settling type." Katsu whispered softly.
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"Well, to put it bluntly, Kuro's a bit of a player. He's slept around with so many girls I'm surprised if he could keep track of them. Asumi seems to be more of the 'serious relationship' type of girl, something Kuro doesn't seem to keen on doing." She stated as she tapped her pointer finger to her chin in thought. She scowered her memory to recall all of the gossips she's been hearing about the two and she couldn't help but think that their relationship couldn't last if they've even started one to begin with.
"Damn," Naruto said, genuinely saddened by the news he was just given. Even though these aren't the same people as they were in his world, he still couldn't shake the fact that Asuma and Kurenai were the power couple and he was hoping he could possibly keep it that way this time. "I guess hoping that everyone would act the same was a bit too ambitious."
They continued onward with their lunch, making small talk and laughing at each other's jokes - a few onlookers could and did mistake the two as a budding couple on their first date, but that couldn't have been furthest from the truth - or could it? Who knows, the seed of romance cannot be grown within hours, it takes time and effort. After they finished their meals the check arrived and Katsu paid for it, though it was mortifying to say the least for Naruto. He knew the rule, if you go out with a lady the male is suppose to pay for the meal, but unfortunately the gods forgot to transfer him to this world with his trusty frog wallet so - technically he was flat broke. After the bill was paid and they walked each other out they both went their separate ways, leaving Naruto to his own devices.
-Training Ground 7-
Naruto arrived quickly at his old stomping grounds to finally take advantage of his complete lack of supervision. It was time to discuss a few things with Kurama and he decided this would be the best place to do it. He took a seat in front of one of the three pillars that jutted out of the training ground's dirt, supporting his back as he crosses his legs and begins to meditate - something he's become quite fond of after learning his Sage technique.
"Kurama, it's time we talk." He said, standing within his empty mindscape - awaiting his friend's booming voice. "This will probably be one of the few chance we get for a while."
"You're right, this will only get crazier as time goes on." Kurama said as his voice came into being above Naruto's head. "Now, let's start from where we last stopped. The reason I cannot be seen - only heard."
"You said it had something to do with the world not being able to handle more than one Kyuubi." Said Naruto.
"Yes, there can only be one set of Bijuu's at once in a single dimension. Our presence is so powerful it puts a strain on the dimension, that's why it takes all of us to create the Juubi, a being that can manipulate time, space, and dimensions. With one more Bijuu's physical presence in another world - many unexplained phenomena could happen. Holes ripped in time, other dimensions falling in on themselves, and quite possibly - complete and udder dimensional restart." He explained as Naruto sat there, dumbfounded by the truth presented to him. 9 beings of raw, uncontrollable power in a single dimension is hard enough to truly keep under control, but adding another to the mix could do untold damage to all the dimensions in general.
"Dimensional restart? What the hell is that?" He asked, trying to tackle one question at a time.
"It's where each individual dimension is wiped out, cleaning the slate for others to form. They fold in on one another to create a single dimension. This is what you would call "Dimension 1", which is where every single dimension is formed." He stated without fail.
"How do you know this? I wouldn't think you would have this first hand knowledge just rattling around in your head. No offense," Naruto smirked as the fox spirit's growl echoed through the mindscape.
"I was informed of the rules and regulations of these dimensions by the gods. While you were busy being reborn, I was being informed on how this all came to be." The fox explained as another questioned crossed the blonde's mind.
"But wait, don't you remember that time we were transported to that backwards world. We fought my emo self, Menma - he had a Kyuubi inside him too, but the world didn't implode." He said.
"That was a powerful Genjutsu, Naruto. This is nothing like that world." He clarified with a sigh. A part of him truly hated having to explain such a crucial part of this jump from one dimension to another but if he didn't, no one would. "This world might be similar in scope to that backwards world, but that Uchiha has nothing on this world. It is organic, real, and above all else, no one is forced against their will to live in it."
"So, you're not physically here but your chakra and spirit is?" He clarified, making 100% sure he had the base concept nailed down.
"Yes, basically." He said simply.
"Cool, so I have an unlimited pool of chakra waiting to be used?" He asked again.
"Well, yes and no. Yes in the sense that you do have a replenishing pool of my chakra but no in the sense that you don't know how to use it properly." He mumbled, sounding tired of this constant back and forth.
"What are you talking about? I used the Nine-Tails Chakra mode hundreds of times." He said.
"Yes, with my help. I allowed you to tap into my power and I helped regulate it through your body so you wouldn't hurt yourself or turn into a mindless Youkai beast like before. I'd say you controlled about 20% of my chakra. The rest I held in check for you." The furry mammal explained, which didn't seem to sit well with his fleshy partner.
"What?!" He yelled, standing from his spot to stare into the vast emptiness that was his mindscape now. "So I barely even controlled my own technique?"
"Of course not, back then you would have lost your mind with such raw power at your disposal. Now, though - after I saw how you handled my father's power, I might have misjudged your abilities. Either way, I'll see if you can truly control my power along with your Six Path power boost." Kurama said, honestly surprised at the boy's handling of half of his father's massive pool of power.
"Power Boost?" Naruto said, staring at his hands. "What power boost?"
"I suppose you haven't noticed, but I can't really blame you - you've been focused on other things. Have you not noticed how strong you've become? Your base form has become much more powerful than it was thanks to my father's gifts. Your senses are heightened, your muscles are stronger, and your techniques are much more potent. If I must rate you by a foolish scale, I would place you next to a Hokage in your base form. My father's level in your Sage form, and beyond Kaguya in Nine-Tails mode." And with the knowledge of Naruto's power and how, comparatively, he is one of the strongest beings on planet earth right now, he promptly smiled one of the toothiest grins he's ever conceived.
"You really think so? I don't feel different." He said as a balled up his fist until his knuckles turned white. Was this what a Kage felt? Naruto didn't really know what to expect from such strength, maybe a muscle boost or something, but no, he was the same old Naruto with an unstoppable pool of power within him.
"Of course not, while you fought Kaguya your body adapted to it. It feels natural, but you will tell once you fight someone far weaker than Kaguya, trust me. But only if you train once again to regain a full understanding of your new strength. You've been given new power and all the burdens that come with it." Kurama demanded, his stern voice showed he meant what he said.
"I can't wait to test it out!" Naruto squealed with unbridled joy, like a child one when he came down for Christmas and found out every Christmas present under the puffy white tree was all for him. With such power, Naruto can truly make a difference, no one, not even Madara and Kaguya herself could stop him from carving a pathway to peace and a new world.
"Before you go off and find some poor bastard to demolish you might want to at least practice first. You know, so you don't murder them." Kurama chuckled weakly at the boy's enthusiasm, it truly was infectious, one of the few positive sides to having him as one of Kurama's containers through the years.
"Really? You think I'm that strong?" He wondered, gazing at his hands like they were about to catch fire.
"You were able to hurt a goddess with your fists, you beat a reborn Juubi container into the dirt, and you were the driving force of a war. So yes, I would go out on a limb and say you're pretty strong." Sarcasm was something Kurama was well versed in though he did bring up some good points. "And also, so I don't need to repeat myself. Under no circumstance are you allowed to use my Nine-Tails mode without thoroughly training with it first." As with many moments in Naruto's life, someone had to bring him back down to reality.
"Why not?" He asked quickly.
"Have you not heard a word I said? Because it's dangerous, that's why! Without the proper training in using it you could succumb to the power it possesses, you could go on a rampage through the village, you could kill millions without even knowing you did it. So, let me make this very clear. DO. NOT. USE. MY. POWERS. WITHOUT. MASTERING. THEM. FIRST! GOT IT?" Kurama roared, rattling Naruto's eardrums like a bunch of dried beans in a Maraca.
"Crystal." Said Naruto.
"Good. Now, let's start your training. It's as good a time as any to show you the basics. Now, close your eyes." Kurama said, Naruto followed his orders without delay, taking up a meditative stance. "It's just like tapping into your chakra as a child. You must concentrate, dig deep within yourself and find the warmth of your chakra - but this time, it's not just warmth, it's a burning inferno." As the fox spoke of the inferno, it appeared. Gentle at first, but grew into a beast of flames that licked at the air before it, waiting to taste the flesh of its new wielder. "And just like an inferno, if you allow it to go unchecked, you could be burned. You must take hold of it, focus your energy on keeping it in check - it is your power now you must control it!-"
"Naruto Uzumaki," A voice cut through his thoughts, the inferno lost. He turned to see the sky was littered with stars and the moon was full in the sky, he had meditated for longer than he thought. The voice calling for him was an ANBU, the same one who helped him to the Namikaze residence. "By orders of the Hokage, I am to bring you to her; by force if necessary."
"No, no force is necessary, I'll come quietly." He said nervously. The ANBU snatched him up onto his feet before the two blurred from existence, leaving only leafs and a gust of wind.
-Hokage's Office-
"Now, are you 100% sure on this, I don't want any mistakes?" The Hokage asked, holding a manila envelope before her as the contents of said envelope was splayed across her table, the physical and blood work of one Naruto Uzumaki.
"We've run it three times, sensei - the numbers add up. This man is a point for point replica of Nami! Right down to the blood pressure, lung capacity, and blood type." Lady Orochimaru, as baffled by this turn of events as her sensei was, said as she peered over Sarutobi's shoulder.
"...So, what he said was true. He really is from another dimension and he's Nami's male counterpart." Sarutobi slipped her pipe between her lips and nibbled on the tip of the opening in thought.
"I wouldn't go that far, sensei - there could be another explanation for this." Lady Orochimaru said, even though her tone wasn't all that confident in her statement.
"Name one." Her sensei turned to her, prepared to see her explain this phenomenon in rational terms.
"...Well, umm, you know - he might be….umm, her biological long lost twin, maybe?" Lady Orochimaru said, her eyes dancing across the room but strangely never landed on her sensei.
A small smile graced Sarutobi's aging features, "unless I missed another baby being born during Minami's labor, I highly doubt it." But soon, her smile left as the seriousness of the situation returned. "Trust me Orochimaru, this is just as outrageous to me as it is you. But I think it's time that we face facts, this boy might sound crazy but he's telling the truth."
"Of course I am," Naruto said, appearing with his stoic ANBU tag along from the Shunshin no Jutsu. "and I resent that, it might sound odd that I'm from another dimension, but that doesn't make me - …..scratch that, looking back on it - yeah, I might have sounded crazy."
"So, you were telling the truth. My student ran your test against a recent physical of Nami Namikaze. You and she are the exact same person." She said as she pushed the evidence towards the boy who looked over it with a knowing smile. Naruto's eyes, however, were not the only ones that scanned the blood work and doctor's notes - the ANBU that mere minutes ago transferred Naruto here was now peeking over his shoulders to see what all of this was about. Her scarlet eyes widened ever so slightly at this new information before she slipped back into the shadows. "I just have one question for you, Naruto. What exactly do you want?"
"I told you before, I want to protect this dimension from the hardships that fell onto mine. With my knowledge of the future, I might just stop a war, an invasion, and many unneeded deaths." He said with confidence as he dropped into one of the vacant seats in front of the Hokage's office desk. "You've seen what my past holds, so please - let me help you and your village steer clear of that."
Silence followed his statement as the aging Hokage stared at him, unblinking and unwavering. She slipped her pipe from her lips as the smoke billowed from her like a chimney, "...Alright, I believe you."
"Sensei, I-" Lady Orochimaru spoke up, but, almost as if she expected it, Sarutobi silenced her.
"Orochimaru, I know you have the village's best interest at heart, but after this unweaving evidence to the contrary…..I can't pretend like this is all some joke. Not after what I saw." She said sternly, peering over her shoulder towards her fateful student.
"What did you see? I don't understand - what could this boy have shown you that you would believe him so quickly." Orochimaru asked, trying to keep her composer. Even though she had a good amount of fun with the boy earlier, it doesn't change the fact that this boy is an unknown entity, and she wasn't willing to bet on unknowns in this day and age.
"Let me see your hand." He extends his hand once again, Orochimaru holding the same questioning gaze as her sensei did a day ago. "You want to see what I'm talking about? Then take my hand," Orochimaru looked to her sensei who nodded for her to trust him. Lady Orochimaru reluctantly did what she was told to do and was whisked into the darkness as her sensei did one night prior. She was shown the visions of Naruto's past and sadly, their future. She noticed her male counterpart and how evil he seemed, how devilish he acted, and ultimately, how cold-hearted he was towards her sensei. She felt devastated but also a bit of deja vu as the betrayal of a student is something she is all too familiar with.
The darkness faded, bring her back to the real world. She looked to both the blonde and Sarutobi, both carrying a tender smile and a nod - she finally understood. "W-What was that?"
"My past, and hopefully - a future you will never see again." He said wisely, one of the few poetic moments has ever had in his life. "I know this is a lot to take in, but I'm an ally here, I want to protect you all - even you, Lady Orochimaru. I'm guessing you also saw your other self in my memories."
"Y-Yes, he seemed like an evil, vindictive man." She said somberly, still dealing with the effects of….whatever the hell that thing was. "I-I'm nothing like him." The man that she saw, he was a monster, a full blooded beast that did whatever he wanted to get what he wanted. She couldn't wish to be anyone else less than she does right now.
"I can tell - the moment I saw you, I could tell." He said with a smile, "you are fun, playful, and a bit perverse while my Orochimaru - he was a bastard, a cold hearted snake who did whatever he wanted to. He took away my friend with promises of power only to try and take his body for his own sadistic purposes…..but you're different."
"Perverse?" Sarutobi voiced, looking once again to her student who, surprisingly, was sporting a small blush.
"Oh, did your student not tell you about her little peep show she got this afternoon?" Naruto asked with an all too pleased with himself smirk.
"Orochimaru, what is he talking about." Lady Hokage asked as her student played it off in what she hoped would be a smooth way. It was not.
"W-W-We should really be focusing on the task at hand, remember? A new dimension, save the village, end conflicts before they begin." She said quickly, hoping her blush would go unnoticed by the blonde and her sensei. The calm and well put together Lady Orochimaru blushing practically unheard of.
"Very well, but I would like a full explanation after our little meeting is done." Sarutobi demanded, getting a curt nod from Lady Orochimaru. "Now, how would you suggest we start ending these conflicts before they can begin?"
"Hmm, I don't know really - I didn't think I'd get this far with you guys." Sarutobi falls forward, smashing her face into her desk as she was completely caught off guard by Naruto's stupidity. "I guess one of the biggest conflicts I can think of is the Chunin exams. At least in terms of property damage and death toll. Originally, Orochimaru approaches Suna with a plan to invade us during the exams, when they accept - he then kills the Fourth Kazekage and wears his skin. Then, during the final portion of the exam, Orochimaru springs his trap, capturing you and him in an impenetrable barrier seal and you give your life to stop him."
"Well, seeing as our Orochimaru clearly isn't like your own, I don't see what the problem is." Said lady Hokage as she begins to write down the details of Naruto's explanation for future purposes.
"I know, I just wanted you to be aware and we still might want to put some precautions down before we just toss it off as if it would never happen. Back in my dimension, Orochimaru wasn't the only person who hated Konoha and I'm guessing that's the same in this dimension too." He said without a second thought. If he was going to properly set this world up for the success it deserves he must account for everything, and he means everything, even if it makes him seem a bit too paranoid.
"Fair enough. We'll discuss this more when the time comes, now is there any more recent ones that will be arriving soon?" She asked. Naruto tapped his chin in thought of all the past hurdles he and his village had to jump over.
"What is your policy on new ninjas wishing to join your ranks?" He asked.
"We have a screening first to see if they are who they say the are and if they're a threat to Konoha's safety - then we assess their abilities through a test with one of our Jounins to determine their ranking. Why do you ask?" She wondered.
"Well, for two reasons. One is because, in a month or so, they'll be a bridge builder who comes here and asks for a few bodyguards to protect him while he builds. During this mission, I came across two people who died and I believe they might make a pretty good team in the Konoha ranks." He said.
"And who might these two be?" She wondered, taking another drag from her pipe.
"In my world they were named Zabuza Momochi and Haku."
"Did you say Momochi? That's the last name of the Demon in the Mist herself, Sayumi Momochi. You couldn't mean her, could you?" She wondered in amazement.
"I believe so. If I'm going by the rule of thumb that I've set so far, that should be him." He said with a light chuckle, he might even be getting the hang of this whole gender swap routine.
"You can't be serious, You believe you can talk a living mist swordsmen member into joining our ranks? Have you heard the stories of the Demon in the Mist?" Lady Orochimaru questioned, highly skeptical of the boy's plan. From what she's heard, Sayumi is one of the hardest headed female swordsmen you will ever meet. She only understands two things, violence, and money, if you don't have either - you are nothing to her but an annoyance.
"Heard of them? I was face to face with that 'Demon in the Mist'. I fought against him - back when he was him. He was strong, fearless, and the meanest man you could ever meet but I could tell that wasn't everything about him. After Haku's death, I saw the Demon in the Mist cry for the first time before he killed every last bandit with just a kunai gripped in his teeth. I will make damn sure Haku and Sayumi live past this mission this time - and I'd like them to have a spot in Konoha went I bring them back." Naruto's expression turned sour the moment he recalled his first C-ranked mission's rather brutal ending.
"If you can get them to come here and ask me personally to join, I'll give them headbands on the spot - you have my word." She insured him, though skeptical of his results. "what was the other reason you asked?"
"...Well, I was hoping. Since you trust me and all, that you might give me a chance to join your ranking." He said timidly.
"That makes sense, I suppose. You wouldn't be much help to us if you couldn't be out on the front lines, correct?" She said with a nod.
"My thoughts exactly, but I also wanted to go through the proper channels and seeing as the genin test has already come and gone I was wondering how else I could become a shinobi." He smiled, happy she seemed to be growing to understand him.
"Well, after today I think your screening has been thoroughly taken care of." She said, tapping the base of her pipe to her chin in thought. "so that only leaves the testing of your skills. I guess we could probably ask As-"
"Actually, if I may. Can I pick the person to administer the test?" He asked, getting a cocked brow from the Hokage.
"I don't see why not. We'll get the results either way," She said, pulling from a door two pieces of paper, each holding several rows of pictures with names scribbled under them. "These are all the active duty Jounin. Choose, and I'll set up an appointment with them tomorrow."
"Kiminari Hatake, she'll do perfectly." He said with a knowing snicker.
"Are you sure?" He nods vigorously, "alright, as you wish. I'll set up our appointment at 6 o'clock a.m. tomorrow, meaning she'll be there at around 8 in the morning. See you then Naruto-san."
"What type of mess have we gotten ourselves into, sensei?" Lady Orochimaru sighed as she watched the blond retreat into the hall.
"One that will get stranger and stranger as time goes on."
Thank you all for your patients, I hope you enjoyed. Feel free to write a review or PM me if you have any questions.
Also, I have created the list of most of the major gender bends in this story, if I add any more I will update it in anothe end notes:
Naruto Uzumaki - Nami Uzumaki
Sasuke Uchiha - Sasuki Uchiha (A.K.A Suki by her sister)
Sakura Haruno - Saburo Haruno
Shino Aburame - Shinako Aburame (Shina for short)
Shikamaru Nara - Shiomi Nara
Choji Akimichi - Chiyo Akimichi
Ino Yamanaka - Inoichi Yamanaka
Hinata Hyuuga - Han Hyuuga
Neji Hyuuga - Nijie Hyuuga
Tenten - Takeshi
Rock Lee - Rock Leiko (A.K.A. Rock Lei)
Sai Shimura - Seiko Shimura
Danzo Shimura - Dai Shimura
Hiruzen Sarutobi - Hiroko Sarutobi
Tsunade Senju - Tsubasa Senju
Shizune - Shiro
Orochimaru - Lady Orochimaru
Kabuto Yakushi - Katsu Yakushi
Jiraya - Jin
Kakashi Hatake - Kiminari Hatake (A.K.A Kim by friends and students)
Itachi Uchiha - Isume Uchiha
Shisui Uchiha - Shizue Uchiha
Kurenai - Kuro
Anko - Ao
Asuma - Asumi
Mighty Gai - Gin (A.K.A Mighty Gin)
Iruka Umino - Ikuko
Mizuki - Misuzu
Yamato - Yoko
Kushina Uzumaki - Kukahiko Uzumaki
Minato Namikaze - Minami Namikaze
Onoki - Ochi
Ay - Ai
Yagura - Yasumi
