Title: Indecision (2)

Title: Indecision (2)

Author: Yih

Written: May 31, 2001 and June 2001

Dedication: To those that reviewed, I thank you from the depths of my shattered heart (that is corrupted with the pervertedness of suicidal tendencies.)

Disclaimer: All rights are Gainax.

1-2: When Bells Come Crashing Down

"Good morning, class," the new sensei greeted the students amicably.

All the students nodded and returned the greetings. The thoughts already forming swiftly in their heads that this wasn't going to be a very hard school year. The teacher seemed nice enough. They were already anticipating gaining control of the classroom through sheer force because they had heard their teacher was new. Besides, didn't they deserve it? They had been through hell the last few years as teachers scrambled to teach them everything that they thought had been missed by the Angel attacks, but the student populous knew the real tale. It was just an excuse to overwork them even more than they were being worked.

"I know I am a new teacher," he began, watching the students attention swing to him from their dissenting thoughts, "but I know how to teach, and even more important, I know how to make your life miserable." He almost smiled when he saw the looks they began to exchange with each other, which said clearly: 'is he serious'? "I am not here to make your life pleasant," he continued, "I am here to make you work until the day you leave this room. And I will make you work to get out of here." He felt them begin to sweat, but that wasn't enough. "Get your paper and writing utensil out immediately. You'll write your first homework assignment down right now."

"Sensei," Asuka declared, standing up from her seat, "I don't have any supplies with me."

"What do you expect me to do about that, Soryu-san?" demanded the sensei sharply.

"Can I borrow some from you desk?" she inquired candidly, gesturing to the ample supply.

"No," he answered bluntly. "You can just record my instructions for the homework in that carrot head of yours."

Touji and Kensuke snickered in the back of the room as Asuka shot them a glowering look. Hikari also helped Asuka by glaring at her steady boyfriend. Touji gave an apologetic look, then shot a warning look at Kensuke before quieting his laughter. Their amusement at Asuka's expense had also opened up the door for other guys that had long been admirers of her, but always crushed quickly to openly show their own delight in Asuka's putdown. There was no doubt in anyone's mind that Asuka had deserved what she had received.

Asuka was tempted to stand up and bang some sense into everyone who was laughing, it took all she had not to show much more than stained red cheeks of embarrassment. It was when she met Shinji's solemn eyes that she felt a peace spread throughout her. The fierce anger on her face seem to deepen as her eyes fell upon his, but really, deep inside her, the rage had lessen at the classes' response to sensei's remark. She watched as Shinji averted his gaze from her, looking down at his lap, avoiding her at whatever costs.

She fought the temptation to go up to Shinji and asked him why he was always so meek and forgiving and weak. She wanted to know why he was forever backing down from the slightest confrontation. If she were him, she'd be at the point of a fusion bomb explosion at any moment. Somehow he managed to keep it in, and she'd like to know how to he did it. There was a control to him, now, that perhaps hadn't been there before.

"You will finish the first three chapters of your Calculus BC book tonight! Do you understand me class?" the sensei nearly shouted his question. All the students nodded their heads, even Rei, who actually wasn't staring out the window. "But," the class held their breath, "since your last instructor assured me that you were quite adept on these subject matters, you will only have to do every other even." The class managed to stifle their groans when he added, "and if you complain, you can forget the every other even!" Every student tried very hard not to make a moan of protest. "I think the first three chapter has about a couple hundred problems, which means you will be very very busy. That means I will get to plan this month's harsh agenda!"

Hikari raised her hand up, wanting to ask a question. When the sensei nodded, she began by saying: "Is that all for homework?"

His eyebrows quirked, and he burst out laughing. She looked contrite until he calmed down from his boisterous laughter. "Do you want more work for tonight? That's no problem--let's see," the class stared on in horror as he grabbed a textbook and started flipping through, "thanks to this young lady," gesturing to Hikari, "you now have to read the first one hundred pages in this textbook. I think it's history. That means my class will be very very ahead for tomorrow, won't it?"

"Sir?" asked Touji with a gulp. "How are we suppose to finish this all?"

"How?" the sensei's expression darkened so suddenly, it was a wonder he didn't pop. "You will finish it by tomorrow or you'll get zeros in the grade book for incomplete material! I don't care if it's wrong, I want everything marked! So you'd better double check your math problems to make sure you didn't leave anything out! And thanks to this incompetent fool, you now can read another hundred pages in this textbook," he slammed down the physics book next to the history book, which happened to be on top of the Calculus book.

"Brilliant, stooge," remarked Asuka.

"And get ready to bow in eternal gratefulness to," he glanced at his student chart, "Soryu-san, who has just given you another hundred pages in the Government and Economics book! If this keeps up, I won't even have to teach a class! You'll all be done by tomorrow! What a wonder! I'll be proclaimed the best teacher ever! Such a revered title!"

Another student was about to speak, but his classmate next to him quickly covered his mouth to prevent him from speaking. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief, there was no need to add to the monstrous amount of work the sensei had already assigned them. And they thought he was going to be easy, a new teacher! All they knew was that they were horribly wrong! If possible, this sensei was going to be their worst nightmare!

"Well what are you doing staring at each other with disbelief," he barked out," get to work!"

They didn't even attempt to argue with him. They considered it pointless, even their class representative for the last five years had failed in her tries to bring about a more proper homework. And no one wanted to fail this class. Life had been hard before, but it had been doable. Everyone was just wondering how doable it actually was as they glanced with speculation at their massive textbooks. They didn't have the slightest clue how they were going to do it.

"Let me give you a hint," the sense began, the students mentally started to pray, "I gave you a reading assignment, without questions, and even if I gave you a quiz, it could only be very general, right?" The students nodded in agreement. "So just read the damn summaries! And finish that Calculus BC assignment, I want to get to more interesting assignments before the weeks over."

The enormous weight was lifted off their shoulders and every student opened up their math book and began to do the problems, starting with question number two. A couple of the smarter student glanced to see where the end of chapter three was, on page one hundred seventy two. They were the ones that didn't rush, that worked through the book with ease, the sensei wasn't as mean as they thought he was. Each chapter only had three sections with a maximum of forty problems each. The workload wasn't as much as was previously thought.

Rei smiled within herself as she saw the concept of graphing a polar equation. She knew Shinji had had problems with this concept previously, but what if the sensei wasn't grading for accuracy? She hoped that he was. She wouldn't mind helping Shinji with his studies. She had tried to last year, without much success because she just wasn't use to talking enough to explain the problem adequately. Asuka often had to take over, but this year she vowed it would be different. She had worked on her speech the last few months, and she thought she had vastly improved upon it.

Even Ikari-shirei had remarked on the improvement of her vocal expression, or any expression at all, she didn't know which. But either way it spoke well of her communication skills if he even said something of it. She wondered if he was every lonely in the large condo he shared with no one. She was sorry that he hadn't been able to find his complete Yui in her, but even though she was a clone, she had wasn't wholly Yui. She had developed her own personality, and she wanted him to see her as she was. Ayanami Rei.

She didn't know if she liked Ikari-shirei or Ikari-kun more. It puzzled her that she didn't know. And there was no one she could confide in. Shinji was part of the problem. Asuka never seemed to want to talk to her, not that she tried to communicate with the red goddess anyhow. Misato didn't particularly want to associate with Ikari-shirei after NERV. And she knew the problem already. So there was no one to turn to.

And she supposed if she had to turn to anyone, it would have to be Ikari-kun.

She tried not to stare at Shinji too obviously, unless she wanted to stir Asuka's jealousy. Whatever Shinji wanted to believe, she knew that the red-headed pilot had some feelings for him. She wondered if she could even compete with such an emotional whirlwind. She didn't contemplate it long, deciding she liked looking at Shinji better than the dull scenery that never changed much every year. Besides, she'd have plenty of time to stare at the green grass later. She had an entire school year to learn every inch of the natural shrubbery.

Shinji felt the heated gaze of Asuka on him the minute she focused in on him. He hoped that she wasn't mad at him for not being able to control the minimal amount of laughter that had escaped his lips. He hadn't been able to help it. He hadn't really been laughing at her, he mentally tried to tell her. It was more of a laughing because the crowd was laughing. And why was he suddenly so scared of the gorgeous Asuka?

He shouldn't be scared of her. She was just a female, a very terrifying female. But he was a man, well a boy that would turn into a man. He shouldn't be afraid of her, and he wasn't. He just hated to make her mad; he hated to disappoint her. What he hated the most was hurting her. He didn't even understand his feelings that he had for her. It didn't make sense. But his feelings for Rei did make sense.

His head jerked up with this realization and met Rei's eyes. He didn't know what happened, but something did happen when they couldn't seem to tear their eyes away from each other. He thought it was the recognition of something akin to a bond. He wanted to know what she thought it was. He felt like he had never known her better than he did at that instance. He wished to know her a lot more, a lot better.

It was then that he turned his head a little and found Asuka's piercing gaze focused on him, penetrating through the defenseless air to target his face. It took his breath away. His lips trembled at the static he felt in the short distance they were apart. He was lost, so he bent his head down, catching it between his two hands. It was like he was in pain, a tremendous hurt.

God, he wanted both of them.

Author's Note: I don't think this is even one of the good "fics" on NGE, nor do I even thing ILYA was one of good "fics" on NGE. Both of these are middling decent and that's all I can ask for. First and foremost, I'm an author and I want to write to the best of my abilities, but I can't do it as well as I could to characters I've nursed in my hearts, so with other people's original characters this is the best I can do. I also love naming my chapters, and this one suits it particularly well. AND COULD YOU SPEND AT LEAST 1 MINUTE TO REVIEW SOMETHING I SPENT HOURS WRITING? PLEASE, WE AUTHORS LIVE ON FEEDBACK!!! (though it hasn't stopped me from writing SD1, which is preparing for release as soon as I finish chapter 4 or 5, done with chapter 3).