I had no idea how long I laid there but when I finally came back to myself, I opened my eyes and saw Major sitting in the leather chair behind the desk watching me. I stared back into his golden eyes for while then opened my mouth to made my opinion known, "I don't like them," He raised an eyebrow at me, unsure of what I was talking about, "Your eyes. They're all wrong. And you seem not so healthy." I tilted my head a little and a smug expression found its place on his face.

"You're one to talk. I had to explain when I got back how vampires bruise to Carlisle." He voice was teasing but hard at the same time.

I lowered my eyes to my feet, "I'm sorry. I meant no disrespect."

I heard him chuckle but there was no humor in it, "For someone who wants to die, you've sure been mending your words an awful lot."

My eyes flashed up to his face, "How did you-"

"There is a mind reader in our coven. He knows your thoughts and told me." He paused for a moment considering me, "If you want to die so bad, why haven't you?"

I felt anger pulse through me for a moment then decided I didn't have the strength to deal with it. I stood up and walked over to the fire, looking in it, "I've tried so hard, but every time your captain is always there stopping me. I don't understand why." I put my hand in the fire then sighed when it didn't light. I felt Major come up behind me close enough to use his teeth to cut my head off, but I didn't care as I pulled my black hand out of the fire and wiped the layer of soot off. "I don't straight up burn anymore either. I'll just become cover with soot. I hate it." I turned around and faced him. He was so close I could get on my toes and kiss him, but I decided against it. My eyes watched his lips though. His eyes may be different but his lips weren't. "I don't know why I can't just die. There's nothing left but pain and loneliness."

I ducked my head after he hadn't said anything and stared down at my feet. I was surprised when he cupped my cheek and captured my lips in his. My eyes fluttered shut as I kissed him back and it was like we were back at camp, under the stars and next to the bonfires. The hand cupping my cheek moved back behind my neck and slide into my hair, tugging on my hair and pulling my head back. His slide his tongue into my mouth, easily over-powering mine and explored my mouth.

He hooked a hand behind one of my knees and pulled it up then put a hand under my other thigh and pulls, making me wrap my arms around his neck as he picked me up. His hands felt like sin on my bare legs. A moan escaped my lips and I felt him smirk. Adrenaline pumped through my body but I knew this was wrong. He'd regret it then throw me away again. I sighed and pushed myself away. He let me go, knowing my intention, and watched me as I walked over to what was left of my jeans. I picked them up and sighed at their condition then just tossed them in Jasper's trash can.

"I'm leaving." He just nodded and opened the window. I jumped out, thankful he didn't make me go through the family, and then began to run back to Angel's. I didn't stop till I stood outside the front of his door and opened it with the key under the mat. When I closed and locked the door behind me, a half-asleep Angel walked out of his room and into the living room. He gave me a sleepy smile and opened his arms for a hug. I rolled my eyes and hugged him. Nudging him back towards his room, I told him, "Go back to bed, you big buffoon."

He took my arm and looked me over with a frown, "Where are your pants?" He squinted in the dark, "Why are your lips swollen?"

"Because he asked about my new scars and I accidentally covered my thighs without thinking. He ripped them off and saw the bites. He was pissed." I turned around and placed my keys on the coffee table, "As for my lips, he kissed me."

A growl came from Angel and I froze, "He what?"

"He kissed me." I said slowly, "I don't think he meant to."

"How does someone not mean to kiss someone?" He roars.

"Same way I didn't mean to kiss him back." I walked into the Kitchen and sat in one of the old wooden chairs. I put my head in my hands then raked my nails across my cheeks as I looked back at Angel, "I don't know what happened. One second I'm talking about dying and the next we're kissing and-"I cut myself off and bit my lip.

"And you enjoyed it." Angel says, finishing for me, watching me scratch my initials into the table.

I nodded then said, my voice sounding close to a sob, "I felt whole, for the first time in a long time."

He nodded then stood up and said, "As long as you're happy, go for it. Maybe he can protect you from Maria."

I jumped up with my eyes wide, causing the chair to fly back, "Maria! She can't know about them. Carlisle said they were a family. She'll kill all of them and control Major again!"

Angel grabbed my arm before I could race out, "Pants." He grabbed my pajama bottoms and handed them to me, "I'm going with you. We'll take the horses out back." I nodded and we ran out back to the barn. Okay, so this past summer I had a lot of time on my hands, not being able to sleep and all, and invented the coolest fucking thing ever: steel mechanical horses. But they're alive! I met this witch and something happened, anyways, she owed me big time. I had these two horses I'd raised since they were born. They're bodies were dying but their spirits were still young. I called her up and asked her if there was any way to fix their bodies, make them younger. She said no but she can switch or move them, the souls or spirits, with or into something else, so with her and Angel's help, I made two horse robots that needed a brain or life to make it work. She transferred them before they died and it worked! Now, the horses don't tire or need food. They sorta ghost here and there. It's like running for a vampire. The rider is not affected by the speeds, which is good because Jana, the witch, would have puked everywhere!

Anyways, Angel and I saddled them up and headed to the Cullen's. When we got there, all of them were out on the front lawn. The women were behind and next to one of the males. By mates, I realized. I buried the stab of pain in my heart as I began to speak, "Maria," Jasper stiffened, "She will come in two weeks' time. Get out of here, somewhere across the waters. She won't be able to find you all that easily, but you coming here will give her some idea of what's going on. Leaving now will be your best option."

I turned back to Angel who was glaring at Jasper when a voice called out to me, "What about you? What will Maria do when she knows that you've seen us, seen Jasper and didn't tell her?"

I stopped and looked into the eyes of the horse in front of me. Be honest, young one. Her voice spoke to me and I heard someone behind me gasp, but I ignored it as I followed her guidance and spoke again while petting the horse's titanium frame, "She will torture me until she believes I don't know where you are. Then, she will give me over to her guard and after they have their fun, she will put me back together like humpty-dumpty and make me hunt you down."

As I was about to get back on the horse, Jewel, the blonde girl blurted out, "Stay for supper."

I smiled at her kindness, "But we don't eat."

She seemed to be grasping for something to make me talk longer, "No but Jacob, Nessie," she indicated to a couple on the far end, "do and I'm sure your friend does. Please." Her family stared at her, unable to believe what she was saying. Everyone stared except for Jasper, who never took his eyes off me. I couldn't make out the emotion in his eyes, and it made me miss when we didn't have a barrier between our emotions. He knew my emotions and I knew his no matter where we were. I sighed and began to sing inside my head to hide what I was thinking from whoever was the mind reader.

I jumped off the horse and walked over to the blonde girl. Her mate crouched and growled at me. I raised an eyebrow and held up my hands, "Peace, son. I'd just like to speak with an old friend." I smiled at her and she beamed.

"You remember!" She squealed and hugged me tight. Everyone looked back and forth between us. Jasper's eyes narrowed at me.

I laughed and hugged her back, "How can I forget? You saved my ass." I held her back at arm's length, "My oh my, you aren't a little girl anymore."

She beamed and said with laughter coating her words, "And you're still 15." Her smile faltered, "But more battered."

I shrugged, "Happens. Don't ever stop drinking, little one. Nothing good will come out of it."

She hooked my arm in hers and we walked back to the house and chatted like old friends. I found out who her mate was and why he loved bear. She explained to me why her, and everyone else's, eyes were gold. She told me how Carlisle the doctor found out that and how he did it. I was happy she had such an amazing family. When she handed me a glass of blood that I told myself not to drink, she told me how she was changed, "I never liked that family. Proud and arrogant they were. I should have taught them a lesson when those boys burned down the preacher's farm." I growled and the pixie that stood next to Jasper hid behind him, shaking.

I ask the mind reader why she was scared and the bronze haired male, Edward said "Anyone in their right mind would be scared of you. Apparently, she, Jacob, and I are the only ones in our right minds." I snorted, "And at least she is more lady-like than you."

His wife and mate, Bella, and his daughter were angry at him for this but I shrugged it off, telling them it was fine. I looked at Jasper and his eyes were black and glaring at Edward. No one else seemed to notice this, but I did and I acted fast. I chugged the large glass of blood and launched myself at him. I felt myself heal and strengthen as I flew through the air at him. Jasper and I flew through the window and I had us roll down the hill. He bit and clawed at me but I didn't let go. I rolled away from him and had the air around him solidify into a cage till he couldn't get out. The others behind me growled and I made a barrier behind me.

"Alexandra Cheyenne Thomason Whitlock! You let me out of this right this second." Major growled out.

Have I ever mentioned how sexy his growl is? No? Okay, but it is. I huffed and crossed my arms over my chest, "When you give them Jasper back, I'll consider it."

He glared then closed his eyes. When he opened them again, they were gold. I released the air around him then the barrier behind me. The pixie, Alice, launched herself at him, "Did she- Are you- Oh Jazzy!" She flung her arms around his neck and dry sobbed. I just stood and watched them while everyone watched me. I knew the pain showed on my face as Emmett, Rosalie's big lump of a mate, put an arm around my shoulder and walked me back to the house. He was saying something about the oozing bites on me, but I wasn't listening. A song was playing through my head on a loop in a familiar voice that I hadn't heard sing since my war days. Jasper's song played through my head and I remembered the two mates back there. Anger boiled through me and a blinding light came from behind me. I heard a crack of lightning and screams from girls and my horse following. Ducking under Emmett's arm, I ran to Cora, the horse, and began petting and cooing at her, trying to calm her. I repeatedly apologized to her till she calmed, and when she did, she reassured me that she was fine.

Carlisle encouraged everyone to come back inside but no one moved and inch from where they stood. Everyone knows that wasn't a freak happening. What they didn't know is where it came from. Suddenly, I felt two pair of eyes on my back then that knew what I had done. Jasper and Rose stayed behind as everyone went inside.

Knowing I was in a world of shit from both of them, I jumped up on my horse and was about to go when Rose grabbed my ankle and Jasper grabbed the reins. I looked at both of them pleadingly, "I didn't mean to. I swear on my life."

Rose was about to say it was okay when Jasper cut her off, "Go inside, Rosalie. Alexandra and I need to have a talk." She looked at me and I nodded. She flitted back to the house and Jasper sighed when she closed the door. He laid his head on my thigh with one hand holding the reins and the other on my hip, "Alex, what am I going to do with you?"

I felt hurt trickle out of my heart as I ran my hands through his hair, "Good thing you don't, huh?" My eyes filled with venom tears that would never fall, "Besides, you could just throw me away again."

His head snapped up. His eyes were so full of emotion I hand to look down on the other side of the horse. After a moment, the new barrier between us was left and I could feel everything he felt. There was concern, protectiveness, love, and lust. The last two I found hard to believe and ignored them. I opened up my emotions to him and he gasped as though he couldn't get enough breath. I showed him my pain and sorrow, loneliness and abandonment, curiosity and betrayal. Then hesitantly, I showed him the love and lust I felt whenever I saw him. He reached up and cupped my cheek, running his thumb over my bottom lip. I opened my mouth instinctively and breathed in his scent. I felt his lust soar as I took his thumb in my mouth and sucked on it. When I bit down lightly on it, he growled seductively and slides the hand on my hip inside my thigh, rubbing up and down.

I pushed him away then turned the horse around. Before I could bolt, Jasper's low voice fell to my ears, "What did I say about horses Alex?"

I gulped down venom as his taunting, beautiful voice tried to pull me back to him, "Ride the cowboys. Not the horses." I turned my head and smirked back at him, "It's been a nice evening, but I've gotta go. Laters, cowboy." I winked then dug my heels into the horse then got my ass away from that damn sinner before I turned around and raped his ass.