There was a long moment of silence following Touka's knock, seemingly amplifying the sound of knuckles on wood until it echoed through the narrow, dimly lit hallway. She stood there, nails biting into the palms of her hands, listening for any noise from within the common room with baited breath. Just when she thought he might have fallen asleep, or even left through the window, a callous, tired voice came from behind the door.
"Enter."
Slightly unnerved, Touka cracked the door open and stepped inside.
Kaneki was sitting in an armchair in a corner of the room, the light from the window shrouding his face in shadow. The female ghoul walked over, and quietly sat down on a chair opposite him, so that they were separated by a wooden coffee table.
Kaneki ran his hand through his snow-white locks, but otherwise made no attempt to acknowledge the girl's presence. Touka felt an air of boredom around him, and could not help to feel a twinge of loss for the awkward, tentative boy whom she had met what seemed like centuries ago.
"So what brings you here, shithead Kaneki?"
It was a feeble attempt at conversation, and they both knew it. The nickname, so often used before, seemed to linger awkwardly in the air, like a wrong tone in a familiar melody.
"Have you heard anything from Hinami-chan?"
Touka started, and yet as she looked up, she found that the boy opposite her was still determinedly avoiding her gaze.
"Wasn't she with you?" Kaneki shook his head slightly.
"Well, I'm sure she's fine. I mean, she's probably going to be a much stronger ghoul than even her parents, and Hinami knows how to take care of herself, so it should be fine." Touka felt herself beginning to babble, and she frowned inwardly, pinching her lips shut.
"What about Enji-san and Irimi-san?"
His voice remained even, yet his hands curled into fists, and Touka looked away, suddenly uncomfortable.
"I haven't seen them around, although rumour says they survived." She cast a look outside the small window, glimpsing a rangly collection of apartment buildings on the other side of the street.
"You saved them that night, you know. I think most people would be more careful with their lives if they almost lost it once."
Kaneki nodded vaguely, yet said nothing.
"Why are you here, Kaneki?"
"I wanted to know what happened to them."
The answer took Touka aback slightly, since it was one she expected of the old Kaneki, not this detached stranger sitting in front of her, yet she didn't buy it.
"We both know your networks can find out much more than whatever scraps of information we glean from running a café. If you wanted to, you could have easily found out their whereabouts. So I ask you again, why did you come here?"
When he next spoke, his voice was a whisper, so quiet Touka almost missed it.
"I don't know how they would react to being contacted by a stranger like me."
She wanted to speak up, to punch him on the shoulder like before, and scold him for thinking of himself as a stranger, but something held her back. Maybe that something was the nagging sensation in the back of her mind that she thought of him as a stranger too.
"I just wanted to come back here, for a change of pace. I'd actually like to work in the café, if possible. :Re, was it? Anteiku makes a comeback, huh."
His tone annoyed her, somehow, as well as the feeling that he was still hiding things from her.
"We have enough waiters as it is." A blatant lie, since they were desperately under-staffed, as even Kaneki could have observed during his short visit.
"I can cook a bit, now. I had to learn, for appearances when dealing with human contacts, during… well, you know." The words 'my absence' hung in the air, layered with things unsaid, and rather forgotten.
"Anyway, the smell of food hardly nauseates me anymore, so I'd appreciate it if you would let me help out in the kitchen. I can hunt for myself if needed, but-"
"The staff of :Re gets their food the same way we did at the Anteiku. You will not harm any of the inhabitants of the area."
It pained her that she had to say those words at all, because the old Kaneki would never have considered it to be an option.
She rose, eyes fixed on the black nails of Kaneki's hand, deliberately avoiding his gaze.
"I think you can work here, although you'll have to ask Yomo about the employment conditions and such."
"I don't need money, although I would appreciate being given lodging here-"
Touka had already turned on her heel and exited the room.
…
Back in her bedroom, the female ghoul lay down on her bed with a 'whump', and laid her arm over her eyes. She was certain now, after the conversation, that the old Kaneki was gone. Tears slid down her cheeks unbiddien, and she clung to her pillow, curled into a knot, and sobbed quietly for the death of the boy she had loved.
And yet, when her tears had dried and eyes returned to their normal state hours later, she made a silent oath to herself. She would try to understand, befriend this new Kaneki, because in the end, he was all she had left of that time now, a shady memory of a sunlit day.
