a/n: Wow! I've never had so many reviews, alerts and favorites for just one chapter. I'm on cloud nine right now yay! I really am happy that everyone enjoyed it. Thanks so much for all of your reviews and ideas. I will definitely be using some of them later. Oh and I guess I should clarify for everyone, since someone asked - I'm going pretty much canon in terms of age difference, so Itachi is 33 as noted in the first chapter, Sasuke is 26 - soon to be 27, and Naruto is 26.

Summary: Itachi Uchiha shot down every attempt at a date, male or female. All of his friends and family gave up hope except his brother. Sasuke made it his personal mission to make sure Itachi got laid and he knew just how to do it. Enter Naruto Uzumaki...

Warnings: AU, Ita/Naru, Sasu/Hina.

The Get Itachi Laid Challenge

Chapter 2

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Thoughts: 'blah blah'

Speaking: "blah blah"

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"Yo teme!" A blond whirlwind came through Sasuke's office door, immediately sitting across from him and crossing his feet on the expensive mahogany desk.

Sasuke slowly looked down at the shoes first, then back up at Naruto. "Dobe, you're late. And if you would be so kind as to take your shoes off of my desk."

"Yeah yeah whatever." He waved his hand in dismissal while pulling his feet down. "Besides, who says I'm late? We still have 30 minutes or so until this meeting."

"It's across town Naruto." Sasuke glared, his eyebrow twitching.

Naruto squirmed under the intense glare raising a hand to rub the back of his head. "Heh, heh. Then I suppose we should get going huh?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes and grabbed Naruto by his black tie with orange spirals as he went past. "Dobe."

"Hey! Hey! Wait! Teme, you're gonna choke me. Let go!"


Interestingly enough, the younger Uchiha gets the same treatment as his brother. The moment he entered the corridor, with the blond following behind, all eyes inevitably ended up on him. Mostly female. They all wanted a piece of him. A very specific piece, mind you, even though every single one of them knows he's happily married.

A bubbly blonde blue eyed girl was suddenly blocking his way to the elevator. "Mr. Uchiha, I hope you weren't planning to leave without letting me know."

She batted her eyelashes at him. Sasuke was tempted to just pick her up and physically remove her from the spot – she was light enough, considering her constant dieting - but he restrained himself. "I don't remember having to ask permission, Miss Yamanaka."

He couldn't help putting the dig in there about her non-married state. He knew that, right now, she didn't even have a boyfriend. She kept pushing people off, hoping for him to miraculously become senile and think she would be perfect wife material, even if he already had one. Too bad she was a good secretary or he'd probably have gotten rid of her by now. The ding of the elevator announced its arrival. He brushed past her pulling Naruto along.

"Hey…wait teme...quit pulling the threads." Naruto tried to pull away from the grip. He turned his head before the elevator doors closed and addressed the fellow blonde. "Hello Ino."

She smiled slightly. "Hello Naruto." 'At least he's not rude!' If only he had the dark features of an Uchiha, she'd be willing to snag him.

On the ground floor, they stepped from the elevator and walked toward the street and the waiting limo. People turned and stared at the two. Of course, most of it was because of the dark haired executive. But the blond had his share of admirers as well. Together, they made quite an imposing pair. Both males were tall, with Sasuke being an inch or so taller. But that's where the similarities ended. Where Sasuke was pale and slim, Naruto was broader and tanned. Sasuke was dark and sleek. Naruto was bright - almost literally - and pretty much random. His features contrasted completely with the dark suit and shirt he wore, but it only served to highlight what were considered his best features. He had distinctive blond hair that spiked in every direction and his eyes were so blue the sky paled in comparison. People were drawn to those expressive eyes like flies to honey.

Now, the clothes took some working with. Sasuke actually wrote a clothing stipulation into Naruto's contract. Then he had almost literally dragged the blond shopping. Naruto had yelled and ranted until Sasuke told him he either took the clothes he bought or he wouldn't have a job. After that, Naruto had shut up and let Sasuke do what he wanted. He took the blond to his favorite places and got him some suits tailored and bought shirts and ties to match. He also bought a couple of pairs of nice and comfortable office shoes. Somehow the ties seemed to have disappeared completely from existence in favor of brighter ones. Sasuke had tried to get him to ditch the orange altogether, really he did. But Naruto refused to part with it completely. He did tone it down though and limited the orange to just his numerous eccentric ties and socks. That had been enough for him.

Neither said much during the drive. Sasuke was on his laptop while Naruto went over the presentation in his head. They got to the other Uchiha building 5 minutes late. Naruto tried to ignore the piercing glare he was receiving from the Uchiha the entire way up to the top floor. When the elevators opened Sasuke stepped out, not even bothering with the receptionist. If she didn't know who he was by now, too bad. It's not like he and Itachi didn't look alike. Of course, it didn't matter much anyway, she was too busy staring to be of any use.

They got to Itachi's office and was met by his secretary. Sasuke blinked then raised an eyebrow at Naruto. Naruto shrugged. They communicated like that now and then. It's funny how they could understand each other so well. They were thinking the same thing as they tried not to stare at the bright pink hair. 'Is that her real hair color?!'

"Good afternoon. You must be Mr. Uchiha. Mr. Uchiha," she giggled, "I mean the other Mr. Uchiha, has been waiting." She went to her intercom. "Mr. Uchiha?"

His silky deep voice answered. "Yes?"

"Your brother is here. Is it ok to send him in?"

"Yes, thank you."

She looked at the other Uchiha in front of her and gestured for him to go in. Sasuke nodded and turned to Naruto.

"Why don't you go set up everything. I'll meet you in a few minutes."

"No problem boss." Naruto grinned teasingly at his companion. Sasuke rolled his eyes and walked into the office - aka Hell – and closed the door behind him.


Itachi was leaning back in his chair when Sasuke walked in. "About time you got here little brother."

Sasuke turned and leaned against the door and crossed his arms, glaring at the Ice King. "Shut up, it wasn't my fault."

"Hn… So, I hope this presentation is worth my time." Sasuke raised a brow.

"Do you ever find anything worthy of your time?"

"Of course."

'Yeah sure, like what?' It took all of two minutes for Sasuke to be irritated at his brother's superior attitude.

"Look, let's just get this over with so I can return to life on my side of the world."

Itachi smirked. Sasuke stamped down the irrational need to run. Smirking was bad.

"But I planned to have you stay for lunch."

'Hell no, I'm not doing lunch with you.' "Well, I do have a lot to do at my office."

Itachi brushed him off. "Nonsense, that's what secretaries are for. An hour of your time won't destroy your day." 'Heh heh, gotcha little brother. There's no way you can say no.'

'No, an hour of time with you will destroy my mood though.' He really wanted to say it aloud, but held back. "Fine. But my partner stays too." At least he wouldn't be alone with his sibling and just maybe he could start getting the ball rolling on his plan. If he could get Itachi and Naruto together, maybe his brother would stop being such an ass. But he was getting ahead of himself.

"Of course." Itachi gave a slight nod. "The investors should all be present by now. I suggest we join them."

Sasuke got up with Itachi and followed him to the conference room. He could feel every eye following him the entire way. Although, considering where he was, it was probably more because of Itachi than him.


Naruto, in the meantime, was left with the pink haired secretary. "So…uh…Ms. Haruno? Where is this conference room?"

Sakura almost didn't hear him. She was too busy giving him the once over. He wasn't bad, not as hot as the Uchiha men, but she could tell he was built well under those clothes. "Huh? Oh. Follow me." She led him to the conference room. "Here you are. Is there anything you need?"

"Nah, I've got everything on my trusty laptop." He tapped his case and grinned at the girl.

"Alright then. I left enough drinks for everyone if they want. The projector is ready to go. You just have to connect your laptop."

"Great! Thanks a lot Ms. Haruno." Another million watt smile.

Sakura smiled back. That smile was contagious. "Sakura. Call me Sakura."

"Well I'm Naruto. Naruto Uzumaki. And you can just call me." He gave her a wink.

She laughed. He may not be as handsome as her boss, but he was much more fun. "Funny. Very funny." She got to the door of the room. "If you need anything, just let me know."

"Ok, thanks again Sakura." She left and Naruto took a deep breath. He was glad she didn't take that the wrong way. He was joking with her, plus it was his way of relaxing. He was pretty nervous about this presentation, after all. He'd done some pretty important ones the last couple of years, but nothing of this magnitude. Also, Sasuke had talked about his brother before. He wasn't sure how the stoic man or a bunch of old fart investors would react to what he had planned.

He set out 12 portfolios and made sure his file on the computer was ready to go. Then he grabbed a water to keep his mouth from going dry. He smiled as investors began to file in one by one, blank faces and all, and take their seats. Last to come in were the two Uchihas. Their youth was quite a contrast to all of the elders in the room. He looked at the older Uchiha and tensed up slightly. He really was an Ice King like Sasuke said. Not one bit of expression graced that face. But good god! Do all the Uchihas have to be blessed with such great genes? He was quite tall...taller than him. And he was even more handsome than Sasuke. He shook his head to get back on track. When he saw Sasuke he smiled nervously. Sasuke nodded and mouthed "You'll do fine. Relax."

For some reason, just Sasuke's reassurance made him relax. Once everyone had settled, he began. "Good afternoon everyone. My name is Naruto Uzumaki and I'm here representing the northern branch of Uchiha Enterprises along with Mr. Sasuke Uchiha…"

Itachi had stopped tuning in after the name. It's not like he really cared one way or another. He just had to be there because he was president, but it was really the investors decision after all. All he had to do was sign on the dotted line after the deal was done. Maybe he could check the stocks on his phone. At least he wouldn't be completely bored. His musings were interrupted by chuckles. He looked up and saw the investors smiling a bit. When he looked at Naruto, he had a wide grin on his face. Itachi was intrigued. 'Hn...Maybe I should pay a bit more attention.'

"Look, I'm sure you see these blah presentations complete with slides, graphs and projections all the time. Why should I bore you with another one? You've got portfolios in front of you that give you the same information I would be presenting up here."

'What the hell are you doing dobe?' Sasuke narrowed his eyes. Then he glanced at his brother…

…Who actually had a slight smirk on his face. Itachi found this man to be quite interesting. No one ever made the investors laugh during a presentation. Money was not a laughing matter in the business world. Yet this man already had the room in the palm of his hand. He had a presence about him and an energy that seemed to radiate from him. This man commanded a presence, not the same way he did, but it was there nonetheless. Really, it was more of a "here I am, take it or leave it" attitude. Somehow, it made everyone relax more. 'Hmm…interesting. I'll have to learn more about this Naruto Uzumaki.' He sat back and decided to actually listen.

"…I'm going to show you something much more interesting and fun than those pages of boring statistics. If you want to read during the show, fine with me. But at least you can't say I didn't try to entertain you." Another smile from the blond, along with a shrug. Chuckles floated through the group again.

'Was that a good or a bad smirk?' Sasuke had begun to ignore the presentation in favor of figuring out what was going on in his brother's head. The man was so poker-faced Sasuke couldn't tell what he was thinking. He wasn't glaring though, so Naruto must be doing ok. But what in the world was Naruto thinking starting his presentation like that?

Itachi almost chuckled himself. Uzumaki was actually entertaining, he would give him that. Sasuke had chosen someone worthy of that position.

The presentation went on. Sasuke finally stopped trying to figure out his brother and just enjoyed the show. Naruto was a hit. Itachi was impressed – and it takes quite a lot to impress the Ice King. More importantly, the investors were impressed. After it was all over, each investor had made their way over to the blond to shake his hand and exchange pleasantries. Sasuke nodded at some of them as they left one by one. A few of them came over, shook hands and talked to him for a moment and exchanged business cards. All in all, the presentation was a success. Sasuke shouldn't have had a doubt though. Naruto was a genius at these things, after all.

"So, lunch?" And Sasuke's good mood was instantly shattered.

"OOH...we're getting lunch?! Awesome! After all this work I'm starving." Good to know Naruto was excited. Then again, any mention of food was enough to make the blond idiot happy.

"Hn. We haven't actually been formally introduced. Itachi Uchiha." He held out his hand.

Naruto grasped it in a firm grip. "Well, I guess you know my name eh? I've heard a lot about you."

"And I'm sure if it was from my little brother here," Itachi ruffled Sasuke hair just to irritate him, "it was all bad."

Naruto laughed. Then his stomach growled. Fortunately, the two other males were too busy glaring each other down to notice the noise.

"Hey…so, what's for lunch? Can we have ramen? I love ramen."

Well that got Sasuke to stop staring. "No."

"But teme…" Naruto resorted to the slight pout he knew his friend couldn't resist.

How dare he resort to the pout in front of his brother. Sasuke almost growled. "Dobe…"

"Come on teme. Pleeeease?" Now the blonde batted his eyelashes just a bit and Sasuke rolled his eyes in exasperation.

Itachi watched from the sidelines, amused at the way the vivacious blond was able to manipulate his brother.

"Fine dobe, whatever." Sasuke shook his head, exasperated at being so easily convinced.

"Yatta!" Naruto yelled linking his arms through the two taller males and pulling them out the room. Sasuke glared while Itachi raised his perfect eyebrow. "Hey Sakura? Wanna get some ramen with us?"

Sasuke wanted to die, or at least sink through the floor. The stupid dobe has no sense of decorum whatsoever. He chanced a look out the corner of his eye and was just in time to see his brother grinning at him. Oh god, he wasn't going to hear the end of it anytime soon.

The trio stopped at Sakura's desk while Itachi addressed her. "Sakura, please order some ramen from the place down the street and have them deliver it here. Order yourself something as well."

"What kind would you like?" She pulled out a menu and a notepad.

"You already know my preference." Itachi replied and she nodded jotting down something on the notepad. Itachi walked into his office, leaving the other two behind.

"I like…" Naruto began before his mouth was covered by Sasuke's hand.

"Vegetable for me and miso with pork for him." Naruto glared at the offending hand before glaring at Sasuke. He smirked then looked back at the pinkette. "If I don't stop him, he'll order everything on the menu."

Naruto groaned and tried to say something but it was muffled.

"OW! What the… Idiot, you BIT me!" Sasuke glared and smacked Naruto upside the head.

"Well, don't put your hand where it shouldn't be bastard." He laughed while Sasuke rubbed the bite marks out of his palm. Sakura watched them with a giggle.

Sasuke rolled his eyes and pushed the blonde into the office after his brother. "Hn…dobe."


Lunch was actually...tolerable. At least for Sasuke. He and Itachi weren't at each other's throats. At least not yet. Of course, the civility could probably only be attributed to the blond, who acted as a buffer. Thank goodness for the dobe.

"Ahh...I think this is the best ramen I've ever had." Naruto smiled in bliss, leaning back on the cushy leather couch patting his full belly. Of the three, he was the one that relaxed the most. The knot of his tie had been pulled halfway off, the top two buttons of his shirt were unbuttoned, his jacket had been haphazardly tossed in a chair on the other side of the room. Sasuke meanwhile, had not even taken off his jacket. He was hoping to make this luncheon as quick as possible.

Itachi was also leaning back in his chair directing his attention to the blonde. "It's from a place called Ichiraku's. He's from the old school of ramen cooks. His is the only ramen I will eat."

"We need one of those by our building. I'd eat it every day!"

"God forbid." Sasuke jumped in. "We'd never get you to work then."

Naruto turned to his friend with a growl. "Shut it teme."

"So, Mr. Uzumaki..."

"Please just Naruto."

"Alright...Naruto. Then call me Itachi. Anyhow, that presentation of yours - quite an unorthodox style you have. However, it seems to work for you."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow. He knew that was the closest Itachi ever came to complimenting anyone.

Naruto shrugged and rubbed the back of his head, slightly embarrassed. "Yeah...well, I just kind of try to make it interesting, you know?"

"Well our investors were quite taken with you. I don't think there will be any problem getting approval for the project."

"Awesome! I gotta admit though, I was pretty nervous."

"And why would that be?"

"Uh...well...I mean, you were there and..." Naruto trailed off at the scathing glare from Sasuke.

Itachi flicked his eyes toward his brother then leveled his gaze back at Naruto leaning forward in his chair while folding his hands on the desk. "And what has my little brother been telling you about me, hmm?"

Sasuke turned his glare to his brother. Itachi gave him a smirk and a wink. Sasuke wanted to smack that look off his face.

"Nothing much...really..." Naruto looked away.

"Oh come now." He slightly lifted his lips into a smile and got up and sat next to Naruto, casually wrapping an arm around him. Sasuke's eyes widened and he came close to choking on the water he was in the process of sipping. "You can tell me. Nothing he says affects me in the slightest. I'm just dying to know."

Naruto, being the naive sort he is, falls right into Itachi's trap. "H-he says you're called the...uh...Ice King? And that you're, well...kinda difficult to please. So I didn't know how you'd take the presentation." By the end Naruto was mumbling.

"Really?" He turned and grinned at his brother who was looking paler by the moment. He loved messing with his little brother. Besides, the blond looked kind of cute when he was embarrassed.

Wait...did he just think someone was "cute"?!

'Well...' He took a longer look at man he was so casually manipulating for his amusement. He definitely was not a bad looker. Tanned, blond hair, blue eyes, well built. He'd seen lots of males over the years. His friends and family had certainly pushed a number of them on him. But he had never given any of them a second glance. What made this man in front of him so different. Maybe it was his warm personality? His naivete? His smile? Or maybe it was the fact that he was the only person who could deal with his anti-social brother.

Sasuke raised a brow. Was Itachi checking Naruto out?! He wasn't even trying and his plan seemed to be having some effect.

Itachi moved closer to the object of his observations, watching the blush appear on his cheeks. 'Nice cheekbones too.' "Well, maybe you shouldn't listen to everything my brother tells you." he whispered, but loud enough for Sasuke to hear from his vantage point.

Naruto glanced into the older Uchiha's dark eyes before quickly looking down again. He knew he was blushing. He could feel the heat going straight to his cheeks. If only he could raise his hands to cover them. He shivered slightly when hot air hit his ear. He really wasn't sure what was happening. Why was Itachi so close to him? Was he teasing him? Naruto unconsciously held his breath.

Sasuke was watching this partly in glee and partly in horror. He really wasn't sure which was winning out. 'Is he flirting?' He watched Itachi slowly turn his head observing his reaction out of the corner of his eye. 'What the hell?! He's doing this on purpose. Just to get a rise out of me!' He glared back and jumped up gathering his things. "Well, this was...nice... But I think it's time we head back to the office and finalize plans. Right dobe?"

Naruto wasn't listening. He was still stuck at the part where Itachi's breathing made his ear tingle. He hadn't even noticed that Itachi had left the couch to return to his desk or that Sasuke was now standing and prepared to leave. A jacket suddenly smacked him in the face. He jumped slightly, grabbing the offending material and glaring at the direction it came from. "What the hell teme?"

"Let's go. We have things to do."

"But..."

"Now dobe." Naruto rolled his eyes. What stick got shoved up the teme's ass?

"Fine, whatever." He tossed his jacket on and straightened his tie. Then he walked over to Itachi with a blinding smile. "It was really nice meeting you Itachi."

"Pleasure was all mine." Itachi gave Naruto a slight smile. "Maybe we'll meet again sometime." He turned to Sasuke who was already itching to open the door. "Guess I'll be seeing you little brother."

"Hn." Sasuke gave a quick nod and opened the door.

Naruto rolled his eyes and followed after his friend/boss. Before he closed the door though, he peeked back inside. "Oh, by the way..." Itachi looked up. "You're not as bad as the teme says you are." He grinned and closed the door.

Itachi chuckled softly. Yes, Naruto Uzumaki was definitely an interesting one. He needed to learn more about him. He unlocked his computer and went to the internet. At a site only a select few in the company have been given access to he began to type.

N-A-R-U-T-O U-Z-U-M-A-K-I

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Edited 3/19/09 for typos and such

a/n: So now the two have met. And who knows, maybe Sasuke doesn't need to help things along... NOT! What would be the fun in that? :D Hope you enjoyed it. Reviews would be lovely. Any thoughts on the schemes to get the two together? I have my own ideas but I'd love to hear yours too. If I add yours in, I'll give you credit and cookies :)