Title: So Many Times
Chapter: Where Sara is 18 and Catherine 30.
Disclaimer: I really, really, really wish I owned CSI, that's what I asked Santa Claus for but unfortunately I didn't get it, so I'll have to deal with just writing fanfiction.
Summary: Sara is 14 and a new teacher comes, Catherine Willows. Student/Teacher friendship. This will eventually become a Cath/Sara fic, but not until Sara is an adult and Cath not her teacher.
-
An 18 year old Sara sat in her house curled up. Her neighbor sitting with her.
"Don't worry Sara, the cops will be here soon, they'll find out who did this to Carrie, I promise." Tasha her old, next door neighbor tried to comfort her.
There was a knock at the door. Sara opened it. A middle aged man was standing there.
"Hello, Miss Sidle is it? I'm captain Jim Brass and these are the two CSI's who will be on this case, CSI Grissom and CSI…" Jim began but was cut off.
"Cate?" Sara asked quietly.
Catherine who had been on the phone had just stepped up to the door.
"Sara?" Catherine responded her voice questioning.
"Oh Miss Willows!" Sara cried out launching herself at Catherine. "It's so horrible!" Sara continued, "I don't know what happened!"
Sara had started sobbing against Catherine's shoulder. Catherine led Sara out to her car as calmly as possible. All Catherine could here was random mumblings of "stabbed…shopping…all my fault…should have been home…Catherine…Carrie gone."
Catherine sat for about 15 minutes holding Sara close. "Sara," Catherine began softly, "I'm going to take you to the police station okay? I need you to tell the people there what happened, okay?" She asked quietly.
"Why can't I just tell you Cate?" Sara asked.
Catherine sighed. "I'm not going to be able to be the CSI on this case because I know you."
Sara looked upset. "ME? What? Why would I kill the only thing left in my life, she was my best friend! We got along so much better the last two years. Carrie and I never fight anymore!"
Catherine grimaced. "Sara the point is I believe you, but I can't be biased in an investigation like this, otherwise any evidence can be totally dismissed which would jeopardize any chance we have of putting the person who did this behind bars."
Sara nodded. "Okay. Will you wait for me outside though? Please?"
Catherine nodded and closed the car door. She quickly headed over to talk to Grissom and Brass.
"What was that about Catherine?" Jim asked.
"Sorry Jim," she apologized. "I'm going to have to be taken off the case. I met Sara when she was 14, I taught her English class for a year. I only taught for one year and that was the year. She is amazingly clever, although the only class she ever really applied herself to was science although occasionally she would work hard in English. She could have been working at a much higher standard in all her classes except science, although, that was when she was 14, I have no idea about what she's like now."
"Thank-you for being honest Catherine, I'll talk to your supervisor and get you taken off." Jim replied.
-
Catherine sat outside the interrogation room waiting for Sara to come out. Ivy Johnston walked towards her and stopped when she reached her.
"Cath, your friend, the girl, ummm…Sara, she's good to go, we have footage of her at the mall at least two hours either side of the time TOD, so she can go home when she gets out." Ivy told her.
"Thanks Ivy, for doing it so quickly, I really want to get her home." Catherine responded smiling in relief.
Ivy was about to continue the conversation but was cut off by an angry Sara storming out of the interrogation room.
Catherine quickly walked over and pulled Sara into a hug. "Hey Sara, are you ok? They weren't too hard?" Catherine asked, Sara didn't say anything, just nodded into Catherine's shoulder.
Catherine started leading Sara out the door, "Sssh Sara, I'm going to take you to my house okay? Because you can't go home and I don't want you at a hotel by yourself okay?" Sara didn't respond but allowed the shorter woman to guide her out.
-
Five minutes of silence in the car made Sara speak. "Your husband, Eddie right? Will he mind me staying because I really don't want to be in the way."
Catherine laughed. "Sara, Eddie and I broke up a year ago, he was cheating on me."
Sara sighed and I spoke. "Oh I'm sorry Cate, I didn't know. So it will be just you an me 'ey?"
Catherine laughed for the second time. "No, my daughter Lindsey, she's three years old. She's the most adorable girl on the planet." Catherine's eyes had lit up as she spoke about her daughter and Sara couldn't help but smile at how much Catherine loved Lindsey.
Catherine continued. "My mom will be there too. Actually no, my sister was watching her today, so my sister will be there when we get there."
There was another five minutes of silence before the two women pulled up to Catherine's house.
Catherine hoped out and locked her door, she led Sara up to her front door. They entered.
Catherine walked to the couch. She quickly shook Nancy awake.
"Nance," she whispered, "my friend Sara is staying the night so if she's up when you get up, and I'm not, don't freak out okay?"
Nancy who was still half asleep mumbled, but loud enough for Sara to here. "Is she your girlfriend?" Sara smiled.
Catherine blushed, "no she's not," she hissed, "she's only 18." Catherine who had been facing Nancy didn't see Sara's smile fade.
-
Sara was woken up later that morning to the sound of a giggling child. Walking numbly down the stairs she entered the kitchen. Catherine grinned. "Hi Sara, want bacon and eggs?"
Sara thought for a moment then smiled. "Yeah why not."
Lindsey who had been sitting at the bench with Nancy tried to whisper but was loud enough for Catherine and Sara to hear. "Arnie Nancy, who dat?"
Catherine and Sara smiled and Nancy giggled. "That's mommys friend, Lindsey; she's probably going to stay for a few days ok? Her name is Sara."
Lindsey nodded and spoke again. "Heyo Sawra. I is Lindsey, I am free. Hows oldst are yous?"
Sara grinned and the gorgeous little girl. "Hi Lindsey, nice to meet you, I'm 18 years old."
Lindsey's eyes widened. "Wows! You is old."
Sarah laughed, and Nancy who had been drinking at the time choked on her orange juice from laughing so much, Catherine didn't react though. Sara spoke in a stage whisper "Your mommy is older."
Lindsey's eyes widened. "NO!" She gasped. "Mommy not old." Lindsey wrapped herself around one of Sara's legs and wouldn't let got. "Say mommy not old. Say it." Lindsey said as threateningly as a little three year old could.
Sara laughed at Lindsey and spoke, "Lindsey your mommy isn't old at all okay?" She turned to Catherine, "you have such a gorgeous daughter," she complimented, "very protective."
-
Later on while Lindsey was having a nap Sara and Catherine sat on the couch facing each other.
"Stay! Sara it's only 2 weeks." Catherine argued.
"Cate, I'll be in the way, you don't need an extra person, I'm going to college in two weeks anyway." Sara replied.
"Exactly Sara, trust me, you don't need to be staying in a casino or hotel, and you can't go back to your house yet, it's still a crime scene. Just stay!"
"Cate, you already have to look after Lindsey, you don't need to look after me as well." Sara snapped back.
Both women were silent for a minute. "Do you have a job?" Catherine asked suddenly.
Sara looked confused for a moment. "No. It finished yesterday, because I wanted to spend my last two weeks with C…with Carrie." Sara finished stuttering slightly.
Catherine looked at Sara. "You can cry if you want to."
Sara got a slightly ashamed look on her face. "It's weak to cry."
Catherine looked horrified. "No it's not! Anyway you cried earlier. You can cry if you need to, I'm not going to run away."
Sara just shrugged but Catherine could see the tears building in her eyes. Catherine reached for Sara's hand and caressed it softly. Sara started to cry and lent into Catherine. Catherine wrapped her arms around Sara in a hug.
After a few minutes Catherine spoke. "So will you stay?"
Sara, who was crying, sighed and said "yeah."
-
"Catherine." Sara whined into the phone. "Lindsey won't go to sleep, she's crying so much." Sara had agreed to stay with the Willows for the following two weeks and she looked after Lindsey each night while Catherine was at work.
"Alright Sara, what have you tried?" Catherine asked.
"She had some warm milk, I red her a bed time story, I turned her light off, I kept her light on, bedroom door open, bedroom door closed, I tried leaving her, I tried leaving her, I tried staying with her. She just won't go to sleep." An exasperated Sara said.
Catherine thought for a moment. "You didn't sing a lullaby did you? That always puts her to sleep."
"A what?" Sara asked sounding confused.
It was Catherine's turn to be confused. "You don't know what a lullaby is?"
Sara spoke as though she thought Catherine was crazy. "Should I?"
Catherine sighed. "I guess not," she began and darkly muttered only just loud enough for Sara to here "not with parents like yours anyway."
Sara grimaced into the phone but didn't say anything.
Catherine continued. "A lullaby, like a soft song, can you just improvise one please? I promise that will put her to sleep."
Sara nodded, then realized Catherine couldn't see her.
"Yeah I'll try. G'night Cate."
"Night Sara."
After hanging the phone up Sara walked up stairs to Lindsey's room. She walked in. Lindsey was a sleep. Sara couldn't help but sigh at the irony of it. Creeping over she kissed Lindsey's forehead. "Good night Lindsey, sleep tight."
-
Two weeks had passed and Sara was regretting having to leave. All her feelings she had for her teacher that she had compressed and hidden away had come back and hit her full force. It was the last night Sara was staying, so the two women were sitting on opposite couches.
"Thank you for letting me stay here Cate." Sara said softly.
Catherine grinned. "It was no problem Sara, you're welcome here anytime, holidays, middle of the year, any time okay? Lindsey loves you and you're my friend, so what kind of friend would I be if I didn't let you stay."
Sara moved and sat next to Catherine on the couch. "I love Lindsey too," she said quietly, "and I love you Cate," Sara said grabbing Catherine's hand quickly.
Catherine sighed. "Sara sweetheart, you're only 18. You're still young, you're about to go off to college. Trust me you don't want this or need this."
Sara's face fell and she dropped Catherine's hand. "Oh, I'm sorry Catherine. I…it's just that this is what I wanted but…If you don't want it."
Catherine smiled softly and lifted Sara's face up. "Sara it's not about whether I want it or not, it's about what's best for you, an 18 year old definitely doesn't need a 30 year old girlfriend okay? Look we'll discuss this in 5 or 6 years, if you are still interested then we can talk okay, I can't guarantee anything but we'll talk, okay?"
Sara nodded, but a few tears slipped down her cheeks.
Catherine smiled sadly. She stood up. "Well I'm going to bed, goodnight Sara. I'm sorry." Catherine kissed Sara on the forehead, before walking to bed.
Little did Catherine know, that it would be that moment, the kiss Catherine had placed on Sara's head that would make Sara fall even harder for her.
-
The next morning Sara got up early so she could make breakfast for Catherine and Lindsey.
Lindsey was up before Catherine and came tottering down the stairs into the kitchen.
Sara picked Lindsey up and placed her on her hip. Lindsey gave Sara a kiss on the cheek. "Mowrnin Sawar." Lindsey muttered sleepily. "What's yous doin'?" Lindsey asked curiously.
"I'm making breakfast for you and your mommy because I'm going…I'm going on holidays for a while, but I'll be back okay, I promise." Sara said softly.
Lindsey looked upset. "I donst wants yous to go!" She yelled. Sara took Lindsey over to the table.
"I'm sorry Linds, but I need to go, I will be going to school, but I'll be back at Christmas okay?" Sara told her, "Christmas will be soon, alright?"
Catherine came down stairs just as Sara was dishing up pancakes. Catherine smiled. "Wow Sara, it's gorgeous, they look so delicious." Sara couldn't help but wish Catherine would add 'and so do you' to the end of that statement.
Sara smiled. "I'm glad Lindsey helped me. She a great little cook." Sara told Catherine seriously but winked at her.
Catherine looked over to the pouting three year old. "Are you okay Lindsey?" Catherine asked.
Lindsey looked sullen. "When's Cistmass mommy?"
Catherine looked confused but answered anyway. "Not for a lon…" had Catherine been paying attention she would have seen her making motions for her to stop, unfortunately Catherine didn't notice it. "long time."
Lindsey glared at Sara. "Yous lied!" She yelled, "you said dat Cistmass was soons, you said dat youst be home soon! Yous lied!" Lindsey threw herself at Sara her chubby little fists hitting her legs.
Sara picked her up. "Hey sweetheart. Sssh, I didn't lie, I said it would feel like no time okay? I promise I will come home soon." Sara held Lindsey, petting her hair soothingly.
Catherine just watched on in interest. She had been about to yell at Lindsey for hitting Sara, but after seeing Sara dealing with it, she just left it.
-
"Byebye Sawra," Lindsey cried at the airport. "I miss yous."
Sara smiled, but she too was crying. "I'll miss you Linds. Look after your mommy for me okay? Be a big girl okay, mommy needs your help more than she says." Sara responded giving Lindsey a huge hug.
Sara moved to Catherine. "I'm going to miss you Ms. Willows." Sara told Catherine crying, but with a cheeky voice, tears streaming down her face.
"I'll miss you too Sara," Catherine responded starting to cry. "You're coming to Las Vegas for Christmas right?"
Sara grinned, "I wouldn't miss it for the world."
-
A/N
YAY! Sorry it took so long to update, the middle of the chapter was really hard to write.
I was so amazed when I saw I had 16 Reviews! Thank you sooooooooooo much!
I would love it if everyone reviewed again it would mean so much to me. My friend who writes Harry Potter said my story was good but I should expect to get many more reviews than 3 or 4 so when I had 16. WOW!
Thanks to everyone who put me on their alerts or favourites, that was cool too!
I really want to know what you thought of my portrayal of Sara, she is quite different to what she's like in the show. Part of it is that she's still incredibly young. And everything that happened is quite fresh. In my portrayal of Sara I always worry I've made her too open about what happened to her, but I convinced myself that Sara trusts Cath now because she met her when she was 14. But I really would like a 2nd or a 16th opinion.
Also wondering, I would really like a beta reader. Preferably an American, so they can help me American-ize my words. Because there are a lot of different spellings in Australia. I have enough trouble remembering to spell 'mom' or 'mommy' because in Australia it's spelt 'mum' or 'mummy'. So I can barely remember that, so I'm not going to remember any of the others. So if you're interested please let me know.
Also. I'm on holidays over Easter (so the next 4 days) So unfortunately there won't be anymore updates for about a week. However! Apart from that I'm on school holidays for the 10 days after that so you should get a few updates over that period of time.
Have a great holidays everybody. When I get back I want to find lots of reviews. (that's my easter present from you guys)
i.love.you.miss
