Um, this is just a filler chapter really. Contains no important information or anything... its mainly just for crackfic-filling purposes. Ha.
Anyway, honestly, I think I could have done better. It's not my favorite piece and in some part its kind of rushed. But oh well, the story must go on!
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Nothing at all... (weep)
CHPATER TWO: FAI'S FEAR OF FLYING
Kurogane sat in the dinky plastic chair, his arms folded across his chest menacingly and his left leg bouncing up and down with a rhythm.
He was trying to quell the beasty temper inside him, but so far, it was a losing battle. His prominent glower managed to keep most people away, but the fact was, the airport was just too jam-packed for them to really go anywhere. And the large, blubbery guy sitting next to him, snoring as loud as a fire truck, was completely oblivious to the death-glare Kurogane was shooting at him.
There were just too many people (and way too many freaking kids running around) for Kurogane's temper not to be affected.
With their newly acquired mission, the two spies were on their way to Russia- Moscow specifically, where Fei Wong Reed was located.
They were still far from Russia and judging by the sheer population of people crowded around him, it was going to be a long while as well.
Kurogane closed his eyes and tried to tune out the annoying babble of the people in close proximity of him by imagining them being silenced by various techniques he knew how to use.
There was always the throat jab. That would leave them sputtering and gasping for air, but he didn't really think that would be an improvement.
He could always put them in the sleeper, but…how was he to get everybody if he only had two hands…?
There was a crash followed by a wailing cry of a baby not too far and Kurogane clenched his hands tightly into a secure fist. Two little kids were running around playing tag, not caring if they ran into complete strangers. A group of teenage girls across from him were fawning out loud over some magazine with loud exclaims of "He's soooo hot!" and "Oh my GOSH!!!"
Didn't these people know the art of silence? And personal space?!
It was just the type of setting Kurogane couldn't stand. His annoyance level was set pretty high, (thanks to Fai) but he could feel it wearing down drastically.
He tried to think clearly and shake away the violent thoughts. At least there was one good thing: Fai was actually behaving himself.
He had been so unnaturally quiet it was hard to believe. Normally he'd be chattering Kurogane's ears off with nonsense crap or running around acting as if he were twelve years old.
But there he sat, quiet and reserved, which was so not like him. Kurogane casually glanced to the side to see Fai reading something, his unusual quietness severely freaking Kurogane out.
Now that he thought about it, Fai had been acting very strange all morning long- ever since they had first stepped into the airport…
His cheery attitude and nonstop talk had quieted drastically while they were checking in their luggage and now he was downright mute.
"Hey." Kurogane grunted, shifting in his seat to face his partner. "What is wrong with you?"
Fai looked up from what he was reading (a safety manual Kurogane could now tell, that was usually folded up in the backseat pockets of the seats on the plane…how did he get that?) and smiled brightly.
"What do you mean Kuro-chu?"
"I mean why are you being so damn quiet?"
"Eh?" Fai scratched the back of his head and offered a somewhat worthy oblivious look. But Kurogane didn't buy it for one second. "I don't know what you're talking about Kuro-wan."
"That's not my name!" Kurogane growled. He seriously thought about dropping the whole thing and returning to his brooding, but his curiosity got the better of him. "You know what I mean. You're never quiet. It's against your nature."
Fai folded his little safety pamphlet and turned to put it away in his bag. "Well, do you want me to talk, Kuro-chi? We can talk about everything!" he offered a particularly bright smile.
Kurogane inwardly shivered. Hell no would he want that idiot to start talking. This was such an odd occurrence for him to be so quiet; he wanted to know why it is, so he could possibly use it to his advantage in the future…
Deciding he didn't want to spit on his good luck, Kurogane grunted and turned back to his own business. He wasn't complaining one bit for Fai's lack of conversation. Hell, a silent Fai was awesome company.
Still, in the back of his mind, he was wondering what exactly made Fai suddenly mute…
After a wile of sitting in cramped spaces and executing the utmost self-control he could manage, Kurogane was immensely relieved when they finally called to begin boarding. He almost jumped for joy, but that also fell under the self-control category.
Fai on the other hand, couldn't have been any more dreaded to go. He groaned as they picked up their carry-on's and made their way to the gate. In line, he kept shifting and biting his lip until Kurogane found that was three times more annoying than his constant talking.
"What the hell is your problem, Fluorite?!" he growled, finally fed up.
Fai jumped at the harsh tone and looked at Kurogane with wide eyes. After a moment, he shakily smiled. "Kuro-sama, really, there's nothing-"
"Don't even." Kurogane cut him off, swiftly placing a hand over Fai's mouth. "First off, my name is Kurogane, you idiot. Get it right! And secondly, don't freaking lie to me."
A few people around them turned and gave him a critical eye, which he didn't particularly care about. Fai slumped his shoulders and reached a hand up to remove Kurogane's own hand that was covering his mouth. "Kuro-chu, I was going to say there's really nothing for you to worry about."
Kurogane scoffed and rolled his eyes. "Tch- like hell I'd be worried." As he said that, he could feel his face redden and the fact that he couldn't control that annoyed him. In response, Kurogane glowered at the blonde. "You're constant fidgeting is getting on my nerves. You've been acting freaking weirder than normal since we stepped in the building."
"I just don't like airports that much…" Fai trailed off. By his tone, Kurogane knew that was all he was going to get out of his idiotic partner.
After getting their ticket checked, Fai and Kurogane walked down the ramp that lead to the airplane. Kurogane keenly noticed Fai shaking more with each step. They were greeted by an overzealous flight attendant who offered to help them find their seats. She took a look at the seats listed on their ticket.
"Oh, you're in row 23A, sir." She informed Kurogane. "It's almost at the back of the plane; after the 2nd emergency escape…"
She took a look at Fai's ticket next. "And you're in 23B. Lucky you! You get the window seat!"
She was smiling too much to notice that Fai was staring at her as if she had two heads. If physically possible, Fai had paled even more.
Muttering an incomprehensible 'thanks', Kurogane turned and began to trek through the tiny isle to their seats. He glanced up at the overhead labels until they read 23A and 23B.
Suddenly, Fai brushed past him into their seats and sat down in the one farther from the window. In an instant, he was already buckled, the seat belt secured so tightly it looked like it was cutting him in half. Kurogane reached up and opened the overhead compartment. While stuffing his baggage into the tiny space, he lazily said, "Hey idiot, you do know you're in my seat, right?"
He reached down and picked up Fai's carry-on bag he had just deserted in the isle when rushing past Kurogane.
"Kuro-tan, I'll give you five bucks if you let me sit here." Fai said, watching him stuff his bag in the compartment without any delicacy.
Kurogane raised an eyebrow, smirking slightly. "Why? What's wrong with the window seat?"
Fai bit his lip, offering no excuse. "Please, Kuro-mii?!" He jutted out his lower lip.
Kurogane glared at him, but found his money offer somewhat appeasing.
"Ten." he said, folding his arms.
Fai rolled his eyes, but reached for his wallet. Kurogane secretly smiled. He could buy another manga at the next stop with that money…
-----
With a bonus ten bucks in his pocket and a surprisingly silent companion at his side, Kurogane was feeling fairly good about this mission so far. True, they hadn't even left the city yet, but this mission seemed to be going fairly well.
In a moment, their plane would be taking off towards Moscow and Kurogane couldn't be any happier to leave the damn city for a while. He had enough of the lame computer work and was more than ready to fight somebody…
The plane suddenly jolted forward. They were taking off.
As they gained speed, Kurogane sat back and relaxed, despite the growing bouncing of the plane. He closed his eyes and silently took a deep breath, prepared to take a long and well-needed nap…
Suddenly something gripped his left hand with surprising force. Kurogane's eyes shot open and he was ready to attack his assailant.
He was quite stunned to see it was Fai, holding his hand in an unbelievable grip. His hand was wrapped to tightly around Kurogane's, his fingernails were even cutting into him.
"Ow! Dammit Fai! Let go of me!" Kurogane retaliated. He tried to win his abused hand back, but Fai was not relenting one bit. Kurogane took notice that Fai had his eyes screwed shut and was nearly hypervenelating. With each quick, shallow breathe, Kurogane could here him chanting a somewhat depressing mantra: "We're going to die. We're going to die. We're going to die..."
The plane shook as it gained speed, faster and faster down the runway. Kurogane just looked at Fai curiously and confused. Suddenly his odd behavior all morning long was beginning to make sense and Kurogane had to even admit to himself that he was retarded not to catch it sooner.
"You're afraid of flying." He said simply, putting everything together.
How could he not have noticed before? It was so painfully obvious now. He knew something was up with the blonde, but he figured it was something stupid like his favorite candidate getting voted off American Idol or some other idiotic shit.
Fai peeked open one eye to glance at him. "Am not." He said, attempting to smile. Another light jolt of the plane quickly wiped his attempted smile off.
Kurogane lightly chuckled.
Fai relented.
"Ok. Maybe a little." He gushed. "But it's not like I'm…terrified of flying. Just a little…uneasy." He seemed to be trying to convince himself. The plane suddenly smoothly left the runway, but was immediately deeply inclined. Their bodies were pushed back against the seat.
Fai gasped and screwed his eyes shut again, his death grip on Kurogane's hand tightened, if possible.
"We're gonna die. We're gonna die. We're gonna die…" Fai began to mutter again. He was getting hysterical.
Had this been a different scenario, Kurogane would have yanked his hand back and told the idiot to suck it up, but for some reason, he couldn't bring himself to do it- not when the blonde was so blatantly afraid. Jeez, the dumbass was turning him into such a sappy pansy…
Fai managed to hold it together until the plane eventually evened out, and once it did, he seemed to relax a bit with the smoothness of the ride. However, Kurogane could clearly see that Fai was still notably freaked about being in the plane.
"You are such an idiot." Kurogane suddenly spoke up, with a light tone. Just as he hoped, Fai turned his attention to him with a questioning stare. Kurogane continued. "Of all the things an agent should be scared of, you're terrified of flying?"
Fai didn't respond, but his shoulders did seem to slump slightly. "I know. It's dumb, but I get nervous…"
"It's not dumb- tons of people are afraid of flying. I just think it's funny that you of all people are. After all the crap we've gone through, airplanes seem just so trivial…"
"Glad you think so." Fai muttered, folding his arms across his chest.
Kurogane chuckled again. "You'll be fine. Trust me."
Fai turned to look at him. "Aren't you the least bit uneasy about flying this… high in the air?"
"Not really. I just don't think about it."
Fai seemed to mull over his words. The two of them were silent for about half a minuet before a person sitting in the row in front of them turned and coughed in an interrupting manner.
"Excuse me, sir? I don't mean to eavesdrop, but did you say you were afraid of flying?"
Fai looked slightly confused at the comment, but nodded his head anyway.
The man grinned an all-knowing, wide smile. "If it makes you feel any better, the chances of a plane going down are like… one in a thousand? Of course, when they do going down, rarely does anyone survive…plane crashes tend to be quite brutal and fatal…" the man trailed off, mumbling something about calculating the average damage of a plane crash.
Fai paled considerably enough to compare with a fresh piece of printer-paper (which was a cause for alarm since he was already as white as snow).
Kurogane glowered at the man. He forward towards him and in a harsh tone said, "Hey, how 'bout you shut up?"
The man knew a threat when he saw one and turned back around with the swiftness of a jackrabbit on the run. But the damage was done and Fai was back to being hysterical.
---------
It had been a good hour or so into the flight and Kurogane had thought that surely Fai would have down by now. He was, as of right now humming softly to himself, gripping the arms rests tightly. Not too bad…
The plane shook so slightly from turbulence it was barely noticeable.
"Oh, COME ON! That can't be normal!"
Nearly every head turned in their direction.
So much for being calm,
"Idiot! Stop freaking yelling!" Kurogane hissed, smacking Fai's arm with the back of his hand. "You're acting like a lunatic!" Kurogane settled back comfortably in his seat. "And calm down!" he added. He could tell the other passengers were getting fed up with Fai's behavior; their sympathy quickly died in the early minuets of the flight.
"Don't tell me to calm down!" Fai raged. He steadily glared at the seat in front of him, unwilling to tear his eyes away.
Kurogane had never seen Fai like this before. He was so blatantly scared, he was lashing out. He didn't even know it was possible for the blonde to be so angry.
And there was no helping him when he was this agitated. Every attempt to help him was shot down and snapped at. The poor flight attendant nearly had a hear attack when Fai callously told her to 'F-off' after she asked if he needed anything.
In a way, it was kind of funny. Actually, Kurogane thought it was hilarious.
This new attitude-adjusted Fai was so drastically different from the annoying punk he insisted on being all the damn time. It was like he was sitting next to a complete stranger. Mind, a very aggravated and currently short-tempered stranger.
Kurogane tried to stifle a tiny laugh that threatened to leak, but this new angry Fai was very perceptive…
"What are you laughing at? You making fun of me?!" Fai rounded on him, angry glare set in place. It made Kurogane chuckle harder.
"No, you spaz. Take a chill pill." Kurogane replied.
Fai glared daggers at him, which was ironic, since it was usually the other way around. This mission was so screwy already…
"Oh shut up." Fai huffed. Kurogane, for Fai's sake and the sake of every other passenger on the plane, killed his laughter. They still had a long flight ahead of them, and if he couldn't get Fai to calm down, it was going to be long and excruciating.
He looked the blonde straight in the eyes. "Fai," He spoke directly but softly to him, trying to get through the hysteria and into his head. "Seriously, you need to calm down, or else they'll give you a parachute and push you off."
The millisecond the words slipped out of his mouth, Kurogane wanted to shoot himself. Fai's face turned from angry red back to terrified white.
"P-push…me…off?!" he squeaked, suddenly hyperventilating yet again.
Kurogane winced. "Aw shit. Fai, I didn't mean…um, I meant that-uh…" Kurogane stumbled horrible over his words, unsure of how to fix it.
The rest of the flight was absolutely unbearable, with Fai nearly on the verge of tears the whole time. But Kurogane had to admit that he was partly to blame.
Only partly though…no need to go overboard.
-----
Kurogane didn't know which was worse: the time Fai attempted drunken karaoke, or this.
The second they had landed, Fai had dropped his bags and flung himself to the nasty, airport floor, hugging and kissing it, catching virtually everybody's eye. He had returned to his normal self ever so spectacularly, blazing in all his crazy and psycotic glory.
"Oh! Land! I love you so much!"
Kurogane had a full-blown conniption, complete with the angry twitching and compulsive death threats.
"Gah! You retard! Get off the floor!" he hissed as inconspicuously as possible. However, being in a slightly crowded airport and Fai attracting enough attention to compete with a parade, nothing between the two of them went unnoticed by the curious and slightly shocked onlookers.
"I promise I'll never leave you again!" Fai cried, apparently not hearing Kurogane. Kurogane's permanent scowl deepened into something dangerous. He was issuing the utmost restraint he had, but with Fai rolling around the floor like a little six year old, he was quickly loosing his self-control.
It made him want to punch the stupid idiot into a bloody pulp that he could ship back to Yuuko with "happy birthday, bitch!" attached to it.
But that would cause and even bigger scene; something they didn't need, being undercover agents in foreign territory and all.
"Stop that! You'll blow our covers!" Kurogane whispered harshly. He managed to kick the idiotic blonde hard enough to make him stop wiggling on the ground to look up at him.
"Eh? But Kuro-sama, our targets are terrorists." He stated confused.
"I know that, you dumbass! And you're going to get us freaking killed!"
Fai cocked his head to the side. Kurogane could tell that behind that dumb head of his, gears were turning…
Too bad he was too much of a blonde idiot to get anywhere far...
"But, why would terrorists be in an airport? That's just crazy!" he asked with genuine curiosity.
Fai didn't bother to keep his voice down at all, and in less that three seconds, all levels of pandemonium broke loose…
"What? There are terrorists here?! Oh no!"
"Run! Everybody get out!"
"Terrorists! There are terrorists here!
Soon, Fai and Kurogane were forgotten in a frenzied commotion. People were scrambling to get out of the airport, running every which way. Screaming and crying and complete bedlam overtook the once orderly and calm airport. Amongst the commotion, Kurogane glared his nastiest and deadliest glare down at the stunned blonde.
"You just couldn't keep your mouth shut, could you?"
End of Chapter two…meh. So, what do you think? I initially only thought of the last part were Fai is rolling around hugging the ground...so, I had to come up with a whole chapter to provide such a scene. I hope it wasn't too excruciating to read.
.Tameny.
