I walked beside Hakkai and watched as he looked at the ground. He was quiet and thoughtful, but he has been for the past few days. "What ya thinking about Hakkai?"

"Oh, nothing much Goku just something that I need to work out." He rubbed the back of his head and grinned at me.

I noticed he does that when he is either feeling shy or embarrassed. Maybe he didn't want to be alone with me. I wonder if he can smell things like I can and knows that I like him.

"Did you and Gojyo have an argument recently?" He stopped at the tree line waiting for me to show him the way.

I will kill that cockroach if he said anything. "No not really, why?"

"I noticed that he as been acting differently towards you and I assumed he was trying to make up for his insult by being extra nice." He chuckled.

I smiled feeling relieved. "Naw, we just had a chat and came to an agreement. I'm not a kid anymore and well he said he would try to treat me better." I shrugged. "We're cool, but he's still a hentai kappa."

Hakkai laughed. "That he is" His green eyes sparkled for a moment and I wished he would show that side of himself more. We walked into the trees and I spotted the hive.

"That's quite an impressive hive, but I don't think we should get too close." He squatted down and looked up.

I sat on the ground next to him and shifted around to get comfortable. "You think they have honey like Sanzo said? The Monks at the temple would sometimes let me have a taste, but I think they did it just so I would leave them alone. They thought I was a little brat, but I was just curious."

Hakkai patted my shoulder. "I can imagine how hard it was for you at the temple." He looked me in the eyes and ruffled my hair. "You have changed quite a bit since then Goku, but it's still good to be curious, how do you thing I learned so much?" His touch and kind words made my stomach flutter. I wanted to lean into his hand and make him touch me more, but he stood up. "I am afraid there will be no honey for you though, this is a wasp's nest."

"Bummer, oh well it's still cool." I picked up a stick and poked at the papery hive.

"Ah, Goku…I don't suggest angering the wasps, they are aggressive and won't hesitate to attack you." He tugged at the back of my t-shirt and we backed away.

"Oh, then this big hole I made is really going to piss them off isn't?" I dropped the stick and turned to Hakkai.

"Oh dear." He grabbed my arm and ran deeper into the woods. "I do believe you have caused quite a stir. We were lucky we ran so fast, otherwise Sanzo would have his chance to laugh at us." He leaned against a tree laughing.

"Heck yeah, but I think a few got me." I rubbed at a spot on my hand that had started to turn red and sting.

"Let me take a look." He sat down and took my hand in his. I can see why Gojyo says Hakkai has beautiful hands. His fingers were long and thin, but shaped nicely. Even though he doesn't use a weapon, he does have several calloused spots from driving all the time. "Looks like they did get a few stings in, hold still while I remove the stingers."

"Ouch" He took out the stingers and then soothed my wrist with a bit of his chi. It was a weird feeling, but I liked it because it was warm and soothing. "Thanks Kai" I gave him a big smile.

"You are most welcome." He held my hand for a moment longer looking at something.

"What ya looking at?" I bent my head to see.

"You still have faint scars from the chains on your wrists, I never noticed them before." He ran his thumb over them. "Sanzo spoke to me briefly about your time in the cave."

"Yeah? You and Sanzo get along pretty well don't you? Probley cuz you aren't loud and messy."

Hakkai smiled. "I suppose so. We have a few things in common and I know how to make a good cup of coffee, so he tolerates my presence."

"Sanzo says I'll probley have them as a reminder for a long time. They don't bother me like yours and Gojyo's do." I felt him tense. "I mean, when I see them I just think about how happy I am to be free. They make me think of how Sanzo rescued me and then I got to meet you guys and now we are good friends…" I heard myself ramble and stopped. "Sorry Kai." He looked at my wrist and then at me. There goes my gut again, jeez all he has to do is look at me with that serious, but kind face and I melt.

"There is no need to be sorry Goku. It's true I don't have a happy feeling attached to my scar as you do, but it also reminds me of what could of happened if Gojyo had not found me." He started to make circles with his thumb on my palm. "For a long time it reminded me of what I did, what I lost and what I had become. Now that it has been a few years, the memory it's not as bad as it once was." His voice was soft and quiet; I had to lean in to listen.

"Good, because I would hate to have missed out on meeting you Hakkai." I was serious and I think when he looked into my eyes he knew I truly cared for him.

He took a deep breath and looked away. "I'm sorry Goku; I seem to have gone all melancholy on you."

He still had my hand in his. I move a little closer so our shoulders were touching. "It's ok really. You hold too much inside, if you don't watch out you will become grumpy like Sanzo." I nudged him a little.

"I hope not." He nudged me back. "Thank you for being a good listener Goku, I'm sure Gojyo gets tire of listening to me."

"I don't think so; I bet it makes him feel good to know you trust him with your thoughts. He's a good guy in his own way and he likes you too."

He chuckled softly. "I know he does, we have spoken about it before."

Crap, maybe that's the weird scent I'm getting from Hakkai. Maybe he loves Gojyo and knows the feeling won't be returned. Dang...now what? "Can I ask you somethin' Hakkai?"

"You can ask me anything Goku." He had begun to trace the scars on my wrist again.

"Do you love Gojyo?"

"Of course, he is my best friend."

"Oh" I felt my heart drop and I couldn't help but pull away from him.

"Goku?" He looked confused. "Did I do something wrong?"

I shook my head. "No, no" I stood up and took a few steps. "I want to go see the fish in the stream." I ran off. My head was spinning and I couldn't breath. Why would he like someone like Gojyo? The stupid kappa doesn't love him back and he chases women all the time. I crashed through the brush and flopped down on my stomach by the pond. Resting my chin on my hand I splashed the fish with the other hand. Damn it…I let a tear drop and mix with the water. Maybe I am just a stupid monkey.

"Goku" Hakkai sat down next to me. He didn't say anything, just let me lay quietly. I felt a warm hand on my back and like a fool let out a big sob. "Goku? What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I just want to be alone" I closed my eyes so I couldn't see his reflection in the water.

"I don't think I should leave you alone when you are so upset. Come here." Hakkai pulled me into his arms and held me as I made a mess of his t-shirt. "Shh…it will be alright." I could hear his voice rumble in his chest and feel his hands run up and down my back. It made me feel safe like when I have nightmares and Sanzo lets me sleep next to him. I began to calm down enough to sit up and look him in the face.

Hakkai wet a clean handkerchief and wiped away my snot. "I bet you think I'm a baby now don't you?"

He held my chin in his hand. "No Goku, it takes a strong man to show his tears to another, I wish I was so strong." Hakkai leaned forward and removed my shoes and rolled up my jeans. Then he did the same for himself. He nodded to the water and he slipped his feet in. "Go ahead it feels good."

I was a little surprised at his suggestion, but now that I had stopped crying and only sniffled a bit, I had to admit it did look inviting. "Oh cold...cold" I jerked my feet back.

"Indeed it is." Hakkai kicked his feet gently and the water splashed up on his pants. "Feeling better?"

"Yeah, thanks." I poked my toes into the mud and stirred it into a cloud of muck. "Hakkai you really think I'm strong?" I peeked from under my bangs because I was still embarrassed about crying like a kid.

"I think you are the strongest one of us all, I admire that about you. Even when things seem hopeless you don't give up and I don't mean just in battle." He lay back on the grass with his arms under his head.

I leaned over and touched his cheek with my damp fingers and watched a drop run down his cheek. My heart felt like it was going to jump out of my chest and I had to swallow a few times just so I could speak. "Ah...ah Kai…I admire you too."

He opened his eyes and the color was so beautiful. His eyes always remind me of the trees at the temple. "Is that why you got so upset when I said I loved Gojyo?"

All I could do was nod and hope he understood why I couldn't speak. I was having a hard time focusing on anything but his skin under my fingers and the look in his eyes.

"I think you may have misunderstood Goku. I love Gojyo, that's true but it is not romantic love. He saved me, cared for me and helped me feel better about what I had become. We are close, but his interests lay elsewhere." He sat up and our foreheads touched. "If I may be so bold…"

Whoa, the moment his lips touched mine I felt a dizzying heat rush straight to my stomach. His lips were warm and soft as he pressed harder against mine. I figured kissing Hakkai would be good, but this was almost too intense. I sat back and I knew I had a stupid look on my face.

He sat up and held my arm. "I'm sorry if that was unwelcome Goku." He licked his lips, like he was trying to taste what was left of my kiss.

I dove forward and pinned him to the grass. Straddling his hips so he couldn't mistake my meaning, I brushed my nose against his neck and smelled that warm welcoming scent I have always loved. "I want more Kai…I really like you and I want more."

"Hmm" was all the sound he made before he tangled his fingers in my hair and pulled me down for another kiss. I didn't have a lot of experience in kissing, so I let him guide me. Hakkai must have understood because I found myself on my back and his slender body pressing my short one to the grass.

Hakkai teased my lips with his tongue and I opened my mouth enough to let him in. I let a small noise escape my throat as the tip touched mine and tasted his mouth. I tasted the tea we had and something deeper, like a sweet, srtong power just below the surface. I pressed deeper trying to get more the taste on my tongue. He moved away and I though he was going to stop. Then I felt his lips on my neck moving towards my ear. Hakkai breathed in the scent of my hair and I knew now that he could use his sense of smell like I did.

"Hakkai…that feels good" I had to arch my back so I could get closer to him. I knew enough about sex to know what was happening. Besides I could smell his arousal and it was making my body react.

"Goku…I…oh gods you smell good." He licked my neck and nipped at my throat. He pushed my shirt up and I gasped as he licked my nipple. I never knew they could feel like that.

"Kai...please "I had no idea what I was asking for, but I needed more. More touch, more tongue, more of Hakkai. My body was tense and I pushed my hips into his body trying to ease some of the pressure.

Hakkai was running his fingers over my chest and kissing my collar bone when he froze. He sat up and pushed a hand through his hair. "Goku…I'm so sorry I shouldn't push this." He stood up and walked away.

"Hakkai, what the hell?" I chased him into the trees and found him leaning against a tall rock. He had his eyes closed and his head tilted back. "Kai, hey why did you leave like that?" I leaned against him.

"Oh Goku, it's just too fast too soon." He wrapped his arms around me and squeezed. "I'm sorry, I just can't."

I snuggled into his chest. "It's ok really. I was sort of nervous, but I didn't want to say anything. Besides I want my first time to be someplace soft and comfy."

His chuckle vibrated my ear. "Thank you for understanding. I think taking it slow would be the best for both of us."

"Yeah, but not too slow I liked that." I wiggled my hips into him to tease him just a little.

"Alright I promise." He did kiss me again. "Should we go back to the hotel? I suppose you are getting hungry."

At the mention of food, my stomach rumbled. "Yeah I am starving." I let go and we fetched our shoes. Then we began walking back to the hotel. Hakkai moved closer and took my hand. "You think Sanzo will change rooms with me?"

Hakkai smiled and gave me a look like he knew a secret. "I am sure the switch has already been made. Sanzo spoke to me earlier today and said he was tired of my complaining and would room with Gojyo tonight."

"Really? He usually hates rooming with the kappa." I didn't care why as long as I could snuggle with Hakkai.

"Well I think he has had a change of heart." He squeezed my hand and winked. "Let's just say it won't be an issue if we want to share a room now and again."

I didn't quite understand, but I was happy to know Hakkai was willing to share my room. Hopefully share my bed soon as well.