Prologue 2
"This is the third day I haven't seen them."
"Well I'm still glad. No more scams or tricks."
"Well don't you feel even slightly worried as to why they aren't here with no word as to where they went?"
"Nope."
"So typical of you Kevin."
"What? You mean to tell me you worry about them? Of all people you Nazz?"
The class fell into argument as insults started being thrown around. Three days after the Eds were supposed to be back from Japan. "Alright class, settle down." The teacher said, walking into the room. It didn't. Sighing he pulled out an air horn and blew it. The students came to attention after rubbing their ears.
"Well I got some announcements to make before class starts. The students Ed, Edd, and Eddy as of now will no longer be attending Peach Creek Junior High."
"What?!" exclaimed the students, even Kevin.
"As of now, they have been transferred to the…uh…Shi…bu…sen Shini…gami Weapon Meister Vocational School in Death City Nevada."
"The heck's that supposed to mean?!" Marie Kanker asked.
"It means that these three are not coming to this school anymore."
"Wait, aren't they coming back at least?"
"To pack up a few things from their homes, yes they'll be back by the end of this week; but after that I doubt it, unless that school lets them come back for winter vacation."
"What's a Weapon Meister Vocational School."
"It's a school where the students are trained in the art of war with various weapons in hopes that they will be able to defend the worl from the resurection of the evil Kishin, the god of destruction." Johnny said.
The class turned back towards him.
"Plank watched a documentary on it."
"Right…well when the Eds do come back, I'll be sure to give them a proper send off." Kevin said, smiling malisciously.
……
"Whelp we're home." Edd said sighing.
"Yeah. But it feels like we never left Death city."
"I know what you mean Eddy. It's like we're bound to that city now. It's amazing how similar a place seems just by staying there a week."
"No. I mean the sun's still smiling." Eddy pointed dismally to the sun.
"What?!" Edd turned and saw that the sun still indeed have the same cackling face he saw during hi whole week in Death City.
"He followed us home guys." Ed cheered gleefully.
"It was always like that. You mean to tell me you never noticed till now?" Wukong asked behind them, not even glancing back. "Whatever it may be, you're home now. Come Eddy, show me your place so we can get back. I'm getting the creeps just by being in a suburb now. Then we'll get whatever Double D needs, and Ed?"
Ed turned. "I can feel my brain baking in my skull."
"After seeing how you live I doubt you need much, but we'll stroll by."
Not too far away from the bus the group was watched by two people. One was a jock wearing his usual red hat named Kevin, the other was the only person Kevin allows to hang around with him for any extended duration: Rolf.
"So the dorks finally came home. Bout time."
"Yes, but what of the two newcomers, the one that hoists the brainy Ed-boy by his arm and the one that fights with the 'watch your wallet' Ed-boy."
"Heck if I know." Kevin replied getting a better look at the girl that was pulling Edd along by the arm. "But I'm gonna find out." He smiled.
……
"Move it sock head." Cutter said. During the week they have been training in Shibusen, Cutter had worked Edd to the bone with training and practice, to the point Edd was ready to collapse from exhaustion. But on the plus side, he was able to wield Cutter very effectively in her weapon form, a feat that surprised him even now. Now she called him sock head too. After hearing Eddy use it, the name stuck and it was her favorite nick-name for him. If he didn't know any better, he thought she hated him.
"Calm down Cutter." Wukong said. "Relax, and enjoy yourself here, cause lord knows I can't now. Wouldn't be good if both weapons were tense."
"Right." Eddy replied. During their time, Eddy and Wukong had been getting along together very well. And Eddy always agreed on Wukong's advice just as Wukong accepted any plan Eddy bought up. A mutual relationship. Eddy went around to the back of his house. "You just stay here Wukong, if my parents see you inside they'll probably freak. Once I got them all ready you can come by."
"Gotcha. But don't get carried away now. We mainly came over to get your stuff, not make friends."
"Whatever." And Eddy disappeared over the fence.
……
A few minutes passed and Edd stood fidgeting around, Cutter usually got gruff when he was this close to her in human form but right now, she was just staring into the sky. Wukong was right next to her, pulling his hood over his eyes. Ed was off being his usual self, laughing along with the now laughing sun, or rolling in the grass. The peace was disrupted by the sound of brakes being applied sharply. In the driveway, Kevin was on his bike trying to look as nonchalant as possible. "Hey dorks, heard all about where you've been. Sucks to be you." He smiled.
"Hi Kevin!" waved Ed gleefully. Wukong looked up from his nap, blinking exhaustion out of his eyes. Cutter got up and stretched her limbs
"So whose the new guys? Some friends ya made?" Kevin got off his bike and strode over, not taking his eyes off Cutter the whole time.
"Yes, I suppose you could say that." Edd replied. He gestured to Cutter. "This is Cutter." And to Wukong. "And Wukong. He's better acquainted with Eddy than anyone else."
"Oh. Like that is he?" Kevin smiled as he edged closer to Cutter. "And what about her?"
"She's my companion." Edd said, a little defensively now. Kevin caught on and put a hand on Cutter's shoulder.
"You know that your hanging with a bunch of dorks that have been scamming this neighborhood since their diapers right?"
"Should I care?" Cutter replied.
"Not really, just that you should watch your wallet around them." He replied, noting that Edd was growing more furious.
"That is enough Kevin! Is this the way you welcome us home?! By bad mouthing us then trying to seduce my friend?!" Edd yelled, unable to contain it anymore.
"What're ya gonna do about it Double-Dweeb? She seems to like it."
"I never said that." she muttered darkly.
"Edd doesn't have to do anything. I'll do plenty." Wukong said, and delivered a punch squarely in Kevin's cheek. Before he hit the ground, Wukong bought his left leg around, caught Kevin in the neck, and pinned him to Eddy's garage door with it.
"I've been around Eddy long enough to know how he is, and I've been around long enough to know how you are now. And from that, I know, that I really don't like you. If I see you talking, poking fun at, or even looking at us, I'll…well, when I'm done with you, you'll be begging me to kill you, something I don't give out now. Get it?" he said, adding pressure to his foot at the last part.
Kevin winced. "Yeah…got…it."
"Good." Wukong smiled, releasing his foot, allowing Kevin to slump to the ground. "Now kindly shove of, I gotta make a good impression on Eddy's parents now."
Kevin scrambled to his feet, got on his bike and pedaled off, just as the front door opened. "Hey my parents are ready to see ya now. Just so you know I embellished a couple of things so you'll have to do what I say. When I do this, agree, when I do this, just deny anything they say."
"Okay…what exactly did you tell them about me?"
……
"Well Kevin, as you people say it." Rolf laughed as he pursed his lips together. "Sah-mmmmmmmmoooooooooooooooothhh."
"Shut up."
"Was that the welcoming party, where was the cake?"
"Shut up."
"Well, what now?"
"I said shut up."
Rolf looked at Kevin who was sulking now. He shrugged and walked off, knowing right now talking to Kevin would b impossible. Kevin balled his hands. "Dorks are dead." He said to himself.
…..
"And that takes care of your house." Sighed Cutter.
"Honestly though Cutter, your acting really surprised me." Edd said.
"What about it?"
"For one I've never seen you put on such a cheerful face, even if it was fake. And your attitude was like that of some preppy bimbo. Practically the exact opposite of you."
"I don't like it. That's why I don't do it very often." she simply replied. There was some silence between the two. Edd continued to rummage through his room to see what he absolutely had to take and what could stay. This was something of a very difficult decision as everything had a reason to go along with him.
"Hey Double D." whenever she used that name she was being serious.
"Yes?"
"Thanks for defending me back there. I know you didn't really do anything but throw a hussy fit, but the fact that you actually did. It was nice. Thanks."
Edd blushed. "Uh no problem. It was the least I could do."
"Yeah emphasis on least sock head." She grinned.
……
Ed was in his room, after receiving a visit from both Wukong and Cutter. Sarah yelled at him. Ed obeyed her every whim but then for once, mother took his side and let him stay in his room for the night uninterrupted. Ed was happy.
……
Kevin was still in the park thinking about all the nasty things he was going to do to the Eds before they left. Nazz came by, along with Rolf. "Hey Kevin, Rolf's been telling me you tried to hit on one of Double-D's new friends, is that true?"
Kevin said nothing. "And then you got your butt whupped." Nazz continued.
Kevin still was silent. "Geez Kevin, say something, you've been here almost all day, the sun's going down, and you haven't left the park for anything. What's eating you?"
"Those dorks think they can just waltz on in like they're something special then blow us off like we aren't even around. I'll make em notice us. And I'm gonna make sure they remember us the whole time they're at that Shibe-whatever place of theirs.
"Kevin? What's wrong with you? You've never been like this."
"I'm just angry is all. After all the garbage they put us through, the Eds are gonna be hundreds of miles away where I can't pay em back for it! I'm just really ticked off right now."
"Rolf would hate to interrupt this crybaby moment, but when does the moon smile?"
Kevin looked up at Rolf incredulously. "The heck are you talking about-oh that. Creepy." Kevin and turned to see the moon. It was no longer the half shining ball of rock. It was now a giant crescent with a face, which was giggling. "What is up with that?"
"Your doom little children." The three turned again to the forest and saw a man wearing a silk shirt that was painted like it was a broken mirror, the thousands of eyes painted in seemed to watch everything at once. "That's what it is. That's what I am."
"The heck are you?!" Kevin demanded, still peeved, but now gave his anger some direction.
The man was unfazed, not even looking at them. "It is our doom I am your doom. I am the world's doom. I will be the one to surpass the god of disorder and panic. I will be the one who rules over the rubble of this world."
"You are technicians yes? Skilled in the use of weapons? I bet you are, I sense three in this backwards slum. And now I am closer than ever. You must be them. You must be. I have never been so close. Where are your weapons? I will devour them."
"The heck are you talking about weirdo?" Nazz yelled.
"Forget it, this guys obviously a nut job, and that moon thing is…we must be real tired. Lets' go."
"Go? You won't go."
"Watch us." Kevin made to leave but his legs refused to cooperate. He looked down and to his horror, his legs were grasped by a long black appendage. He only had a second to realize one had grabbed him and his friends when hey were swept up.
"I am the one who end it all. I am the one who will destroy all. And from the bones of the dead I will lash my throne, where I will rule over everything and nothing for eternity." The strange man finished.
……
"You feel that?" Cutter asked.
"Yeah. Such evil…" Edd replied.
"And so close to home let's go."
……
"Oh man, that's one nasty soul." Wukong said, sensing a Kishin egg developing.
"Ugh and you eat those things?" Eddy asked.
"It's the only way to make me a death scythe now."
"How many till you do?"
"I got forty three so far, so just fifty six more and a witch soul. This'll be good warm up for ya now. Let's go."
"You got it. Some action!" cackled Eddy, cracking his knuckles together.
……
Ed woke with a start. "Ed feels sick to his tummy."
He got out of bed and climbed out the window, following the source of his stomach ache, hoping to stop whatever was doing it.
……
It was actually two separate monsters that held them. One held Kevin and Rolf, another held Nazz. In front of them the crazy man led the two creatures to a clearing in the forest. With a gesture, the monsters tied the three kids to a rocks that were arranged all around the clearing in some strange ritual. Kevin looked around and saw that the creatures had been busy, as they had just about everyone in the cul-de-sac. Sarah, Jimmy, Johnny, even he Kankers were all hung in a row next to him. If only he wasn't upside down maybe all the blood gushing in his head would stop long enough for him to get an idea. Under the direct moonlight, Kevin saw the monsters. They didn't seem to have any true form or color, just constantly shifting lumps of meat that shifted in size, shape and color every moment. Between them stood the crazy man, now that Kevin was more or less forced to look at him, he managed to get a good memory of his looks. He had long, unkempt black hair that went almost to his waist, his pale skin matching the grey pants he wore, so much that it looked like he was wearing a second skin. What creeped him out was that the man walked barefoot, and was oblivious to all of the shards of broken glass embedded in them. A trail of blood constantly dripped from his feet. In his hand he held what looked like a Ziploc bag full of blue glowing balls. He took one out and stuffed it in his mouth like it was a marshmallow.
"Once again, I have been fooled. But fooled I have been not for much longer. Even now the weapon bearers move to me. Even now they approach me. I am shaking with anticipation."
"You better hope they find you first." Marie Kanker growled, finally free of her bonds, and had just released her sisters. "Before we finish with you that is." And they made a jump for him and his monsters. The man threw his bag into the air, calmly turned, and slammed a fist into the charging Marie. "You do not possess it. Be purged." And the force sent her flying back, slamming into a tree. Before the other two could react to their fallen sister, the man was on them. It was over in exactly one second, the other two perched unconscious next to Marie. "You are merely feed. Nothing more." He said, doing twirl, catching his bag, and turning back to his beasts that still stood at attention.
He suddenly gasped and jumped to a side. A moment later, a harpoon like blade embedded itself in the ground where the man was just standing. "They come." He laughed. "They come."
To everyone's surprise, Eddy jumped out of the bushes, pulling his chain whip back, its length wrapping around his casting arm. "Hello. Bozo." he said.
"Ed-boy? Someone turn Rolf around so Rolf may confirm with his eyes what Rolf's ears have heard.
The man giggled. "There was but one? No. There were two. I sensed two."
As if two answer him, a shot rang out, hitting one of the monsters square between what was probably its head. It slowly morphed and twisted as more shots were being poured into it, before dissolving into a glowing red orb. Edd walked out, holding a PSG1 closely to his chest, aiming it at the second creature. "Hey that was my kill!" Eddy growled.
"Ah you got plenty as it is." Cutter retorted, her face appearing in the gun's reflection.
"Yes, they are all gathered here." The man cheered. He spun around and jumped to dodge Ed, who cannonball'd into the ground. "Stop with the belly hurt!" he declared.
"Are those the same Eds we know?" Nazz asked to herself.
"I dunno. I really don't."
The man turned to Ed. "I seek no audience with you be gone." And jumped for him, using the same attack as he did on the Kankers. Ed grabbed his assailant by the wrist, slammed his arm down and delivered a punch of equal force to the man's jaw. He went flying, but recovered mid air and landed squarely on his right toes. "Hey!" he yelled. "I actually felt that, good job." His face held only a slight bruise, but he was coughing blood. He snapped his fingers and the remaining monster crouched into an attack stance. The man sat on a rock, and started stuffing his face with the blue orbs in his bag like it was popcorn.
The remaining monster lunged for Ed but was stopped by Eddy. "You ain't goin' nowhere big guy." It screeched and lased out at Eddy. He jumped to the side, and blocked a second attack. Jumping over a third attack, he lashed out with his chain whip, leaving a long gash in its flesh. It screeched, not in pain, but anger that its target wasn't dying. It countered, and though Eddy managed to block it with Wukong, the force of the impact sent him off his guard, which the monster exploited, with a mighty swing. Eddy landed several feet away, not badly injured but really disoriented. The monster shrieked as Edd began to pour shots into it, now that Eddy was no longer blocking his aim. "He's mine!" Eddy yelled and he got up. "Wukong, we're doin' it!"
"Gotcha!"
The souls of Eddy and Wukong resonated perfectly with each other, temporarily merging and amplifying each other's soul wavelength.
Soul Resonance! they yelled simultaneously. The whip grew in length and the blades on each chain grew larger. Eddy swung his arm around and it enveloped the artificial monster. The whip's head swung about and embedded itself in the monster's flesh.
Iron maiden.
Eddy pulled. The chains bit deep into the monster, and constricted themselves tighter and tighter, ripping the monster to shreds. With a final pull, the whip pulled back, tearing the construct to shreds. In its place, the red corrupt human soul floated gently to the ground. "Oh yeah. That's how it's done." Eddy boasted.
"I loosened him up for you…" Cutter said.
"But I still killed it." Wukong retorted.
The man's eye twitched. Then cackled, throwing his head back. "I went through a lot of trouble to get those two. I suppose the mistress will want to know about that." He giggle lightly, bending so far back that his head rested on the ground. "There was not two but three. Her research will benefit greatly. And then I-", he straightened up. "shall reign as the new God-King!" and he stuffed the blue balls in his mouth and bounded off.
"Hey we ain't done with you yet!" Eddy yelled, ready to jump after him. He then realized that Wukong wasn't at his wrist anymore, but was back in human form holding a kishin egg. "Ah he's too far gone now, plus he's hopped up on all those human souls, he'll be miles away. 'Sides I'm hungry." He stuffed the soul in and chewed it. Eddy gagged. "Do those taste good or something?"
"No." Cutter replied, eating her own kishin egg.
"I just like the texture against my tongue. Like a giant gummi ball that won't ever melt." Wukong smiled, still chewing for a few more seconds before swallowing.
"Fellows, aren't we forgetting something?" Edd said, pointing to the cul-de-sac kids still hanging from the rocks, one of which Ed was perched on the top staring at the moon. "His gums are bleeding again." He stated matter of factly. "I really think he needs a dentist guys."
……
Kevin held true to his original promise. He gave the Eds a send off to remember. Not exactly the way he was originally intending but after the incident the night before, it was the least he could do. The Eds were the heroes of the day, and were treated like so, the weapon partners regarded as something of awe. During that time Kevin went up to Cutter and apologized for the way he had tried to hit on her. Cutter accepted it in her own way: by giving him a wedgie.
The party Kevin threw ended too quickly and the Eds were expected to return to Death City by the end of the day. Even then the kids were still there to give them a warm send-off. The Kankers each said goodbye to their respective 'boyfriends' with a tearful embrace that the Eds desperately tried to repulse. Rolf gave the Eds a farewll-to-thee-good-luck-and-may-your-goat-cheese-never-grow-moldy song, which he kep thankfully short.
Ed waved back an boarded, along with Edd, and Cutter. Eddy stayed for a moment and eyed Kevin. The two glared at each other for a minute, and Wukong stood ready in case things got ugly. Eddy was the first to crack a smile and they started laughing, patting each other on the back. "You take care of yourself dork."
"Same to you jerk." Eddy replied, and boarded his fight. Wukong stayed for a moment and looked at the waving kids. "You know, all you need is a weapon, and you could join too now." He said, picking his teeth with a pinky. He let his last words set in to the kids as he boarded the flight. The kids were deep in thought as they watched the plane make for the runway. "A weapon eh?"
"How do we go and make that happen?"
"Meh, We'll find one."
……
Everything was tied up smoothly at home for the Eds. "Well Edd for once something turned out without us getting our butts kicked maybe your bad luck curse has been lifted."
"Yes, I agree tha-hey! I told you I have no bad-luck curse!"
"This is the captainn speaking, I regret to inform you that the lavatories are not working, and as an apology, complimentary drinks will be given throughout the flight."
Edd fell silent. "I spoke too soon." Eddy groaned.
"Friggin PATH-E-Tech." Cutter muttered.
