Whoot! Exams are over, managed to not fail that badly, and I have returned to the world of fanfics with more updates and a brand spanking new name! No, I haven't been usurped by an evil twin, I'm still cherryblossomroses, just with a new name, as explained on my profile, so no big dramas or heart-attacks :D Of course, those who wish to can still call me cherry :) Otherwise it's 'Dilly'. I may change back some time in the future. Maybe. It's refreshing.

Meh, not the best chapter I've written. It's just mainly a filler for background info, setting up the story and all that stuff. It'll get going along next chapter, I think. XD


Die Lebendsliste

Chapter 1 - Einsamkeit der Puppe

Loneliness of the Doll


You will find as you look back upon your life

That the moments when you have truly lived

Are the moments when you have done things

In the spirit of love.

- Henry Drummond -


THWACK!

Sakurada Jun groggily blinked open his eyes to find himself staring into a pair of clear, sky blue eyes gazing impassively back at him. Mumbling something incoherently, he turned to go back to sleep when a second healthy 'whack' resounded in his ears and a sharp, stinging pain quickly spread across his cheek.

"What the hell was that for?" The boy sat up fully awake now, his hair ruffled and resembling an odd bird's nest with tufts sticking out here and there. Scowling, he rubbed his reddened and sore cheek, glaring at the petite doll who stood beside his bed. Shinku, fifth doll of the Rozen Maiden, merely stared stonily back at him.

"You're late," she said flatly, and held up her teacup. Suddenly panicked, Jun flung the covers off and swung his legs over the side of the bed.

"What time is it?"

"Eight-thirty."

"CRAP!" Jun launched himself across the room, hurriedly grabbing bits and pieces off his desk, books, pens, pencils, and stuffing them messily into a bag. "I'm going to be so late…" he mumbled. Shinku watched him as he almost tripped over his chair trying to reach a notebook that was lying on top of his keyboard. After a few minutes of frantic rummaging around his room, Jun turned to face the doll.

"What?"

"Um, aren't you going to get out? I kinda need to change…"

Shinku regarded him coolly for a few moments, her lips curling slightly in an expression of mild reproach.

"Stupid servant," was all she had to say, before striding out of the room with her nose in the air.

"JUUUN! WE'RE GOING TO BE – oh, there you are. Tomoe's waiting at the door." Nori smiled brightly at Jun as he flew down the stairs, buttoning his shirt and tugging on his blazer.

"Hey," Jun greeted Tomoe standing in the doorway, "just a few more minutes? Gotta make tea…" he disappeared into the kitchen, muttering under his breath and Tomoe couldn't help but let slip a smile. Even though he was running late, making Shinku's tea was something he wouldn't even think of missing.

"Here." The doll wrenched her eyes from the television and watched Jun as he set the tray and tea set down on the coffee table, before pouring out the tea so hurriedly he almost spilt it.

"You are really quite clumsy, Jun," she observed mildly. He turned to her, wanting to make some sort of comeback, when he noticed the enormous, dusty book sitting in her lap. Peeling golden letters in some foreign language – German, it looked like – were stamped across the cover. It was so thick it almost looked heavy enough to crush her little doll's legs as it teetered precariously on her knees when she leant forward to pick up her cup.

"Research," said Shinku, noticing Jun's stare. Her eyes involuntarily shifted to the two still figures sharing the couch seat beside her.

"Don't tire yourself out too much. You'll definitely find a way," he said gently, missing her look of surprise as he turned to leave. They hadn't been talking much lately, as he'd been so busy with schoolwork and she only saw him in the morning, afternoons and on weekends now. Such kind words exchanged between them were becoming few and far in between.

"Jun."

He looked back at the sound of Shinku's quiet, mellifluous voice addressing him. Her eyes were soft; a look he'd been missing recently, and she had the steaming cup of tea cradled in her hands like it was made of precious glass.

"Thank you." The corner of her lips curved upwards ever so slightly in a faint smile, before she turned back to the television, one hand resting absentmindedly on an open page of her book. "Also…have a nice day at school."

For that, Jun thought as he joined Nori and Tomoe at the door, he definitely would now.


It had been almost a full year since the defeat of the fake eighth Rozen Maiden, Barasuishou, and everyone's lives had seemingly resumed their normal routines. Well, almost normal, mused Shinku as she sipped at her tea and glanced up down at her page.

After returning, Jun had continued to spend time studying at the library, until a month ago he decided he was finally ready to go back to school. It was to be his first year of high school, and whilst at first he had been hesitant despite Tomoe's encouragement, in the end it was Shinku who, as usual, finally convinced him to discard his fear.

Since he'd missed most of middle school; Jun had considered there really wasn't much point in attending the very last term. Instead he'd waited until the new semester and started in the same high school as Tomoe and Nori, the latter almost crying with joy when she realised that she'd finally be able to walk to school with her brother like she'd always dreamed.

Of course, whilst finally being able to go back to school was rather nice (he was now able to avoid that demonic Suiseiseki more easily now), it wasn't without its disadvantages. For one, he was still unused to getting up so early after spending so much time just lounging around at home. As well as that, Shinku had told him quite sternly she still expected her regular serving of tea at least once in the morning and in the afternoon, if he was not to be at home during the day.

It was very hard work fitting everything into the twenty four hours of the day he was given – juggling school, making tea, homework, yelling every five minutes at Suiseiseki (and lately, Kanaria too) and carrying out Shinku's orders, which were no less demanding than they had always been.

The fifth doll herself was not idling aimlessly about either. She had taken Rozen's word very seriously, and had devoted herself entirely to seeking some way to restore Hinaichigo and Souseiseki's Rosa Mysticae. A brief and rather awkward meeting with Suigintou had confirmed that the first doll was not in possession of either, and endless hours of wandering through the N-field had failed to turn up anything.

On top of this, Shinku was churning through every scrap of information about the Alice Game and the Rozen Maiden she could find. She had even started watching less and less Kunkun shows. Every few days she would instruct Jun to borrow certain books from the library, and she had even taken up searching on the internet using Jun's computer in her relentless search for knowledge. Still, even after a year, she was getting nowhere. The internet and few books about the Rozen Maiden she could get a hold of told her no more than what she already knew.

Sighing, Shinku drained the last of her cup and rubbed her temple wearily, a dull headache nudging the back of her head. She'd been staying up late these past few nights, reading through several new books she had seen about whilst browsing the net. Searching the vast endlessness of the N-field too, was a tiring task, especially since Jun wasn't with her to provide her with a direct source of power. She winced as the shattering of glass, followed by a loud crashing sound reverberated upstairs.

"OHOHOH! The great and almighty Suiseiseki has – awww dammit, he's not here!"

It would be interesting to note that at this exact moment, a kilometre or so away, Jun felt a shiver run down his spine and he had the oddest feeling that his bedroom window was no longer in its frame. It couldn't be…her

Shinku set her book aside with a sigh and walked over to the bottom of the stairs, looking up at the Gardener bursting out of Jun's room, glass shards sprinkling off her hair and clothes, and stood pouting with her hands on her hips.

"Hello, Suiseiseki."

"Hmph. Is the chibi already gone, Shinku?"

Another sigh.

"Obviously."

"What a rude chibi, desu! Not even waiting for me to greet him in the morning. Is he my medium or what? I should teach him a lesson or two about manners. Honestly, he's so obnoxious."

Shinku smiled up at her sister, not fooled for a single moment.

"Are you missing him, Suiseiseki?"

The Gardener started to blush furiously and almost tripped down the stairs as she spluttered denial.

"O-Of course not! Good riddance, I say! It's so much more peaceful without him around and…and…I can do whatever I want! Hahahaha…" she trailed off as Shinku arched one perfect eyebrow.

"Ok fine, I'm just disappointed because I fully had an entrance speech and everything all worked out and now he's gone off to stupid chibi school, I can't see the look on his face when I smash my case into his head."

"Have you ever considered, perhaps, that is exactly why he takes pains to avoid you?" Shinku joined Suiseiseki at the top of the stairs and peered into Jun's room, surveying the damage. His much-abused window was, as usual, scattered in pieces all over the floor.

"Can you not find some other form of entertainment? Perhaps some choice of amusement that does not involve my having to waste power fixing broken glass?" said Shinku as a red glow illuminated the room and she directed the fragments of window back into place.

Several kilometres away in some other part of town at the gates of his school, Jun felt the medium's ring grow warm and he gritted his teeth, muttering darkly under his breath. "Damn, evil doll again…"

"How are the Shibasaki's?" enquired Shinku as she and Suiseiseki settled themselves down on the couch. Nowadays, Suiseiseki alternated her time between Jun's house and the old watch-maker's; ever since Souseiseki's departure Suiseiseki had taken it on herself to ensure that she kept the elderly couple company in her twin's absence.

"Oh, they're doing all right. They miss Souseiseki, though. I think I might take her along with me tomorrow," said Suiseiseki, gently stroking her twin's head, which lay in her lap. Shinku nodded, and resumed studying the book she had been reading earlier.

"All hail! The smartest of the Rozen Maiden has successfully – OOMPF!" The newly arrived Kanaria, who had just entered through the unlocked sliding door, found her mouth occupied by the large fluffy cushion Suiseiseki had launched across the room with deadly accuracy into her face.

"Ding-ding! Bullseye!" Suiseiseki punched the air triumphantly. Much to the Gardener's annoyance, Kanaria visited them almost every day straight after Micchan went to work, and even sometimes had dinner with them on the days that her medium had to work late. In light of Hinaichigo's absence – the sister with whom they both would have normally enjoyed quarrelling with – both Suiseiseki and Kanaria had begun something of a turbulent, volatile and rather violent rivalry of their own. They argued almost incessantly, driving Jun mad and once even prompting Shinku to threaten a hair-slap if they didn't cease 'that infernal noise'.

Still, Shinku considered as she watched Kanaria tear the cushion savagely from her mouth and yell a furious insult at Suiseiseki, the whole affair with Barasuishou and the past year had brought them somewhat closer together – all of them, Suigintou included; even though nowadays she rarely saw the first doll unless by chance they came across each other in the field of N.

Those thoughts only seemed to remind her more of her obligation to find some way to end the Alice Game, and the need to revive Souseiseki and Hinaichigo. The absence of the two dolls was like some unseen scar that marred everyone's thoughts. Though all of them had managed to deal with it in their own way, Shinku knew that both dolls were still sorely missed, and they would continue to be for as long as they were gone. The enormous responsibility rested on her shoulders, and it was a burden she had decided she would carry to the very end. She wouldn't rest until her sisters opened their eyes again.

Sighing, Shinku rubbed at her forehead once more as another headache threatened to rise. Though she would never admit it, she was finding herself being more and more affected by Jun's absence every day. She had thought that she would hardly mind if he wasn't around the house, but his absence had left a much larger gap in her life than she'd expected even though he came back home every afternoon.

She hardly spoke to anyone anymore now that he wasn't around – both Jun and Nori were away for the entire day. She cared little for Suiseiseki and Kanaria's verbal stoushes and they, likewise, were often too preoccupied with each other to engage with her unless it was to resolve another petty dispute. It was a while before she realised that his unsettling feeling growing in her chest was loneliness – just the pure need, a simple desire to be around him the way she used to, and the feeling only grew more uncomfortable as it ruffled her pride to think that she could be so influenced by his presence, or rather, the lack of it.

Trying to block out the distractingly shrill voices of Suiseiseki and Kanaria firing off at each other, Shinku frowned in concentration and re-immersed herself in her book. She became so absorbed in reading that she momentarily forgot that Jun wasn't around and held her cup out distractedly, eyes still glued to the book.

"Jun, go fetch me some more tea."

There was a hesitant silence as Suiseiseki and Kanaria ceased their verbal assault and both turned to stare at their sister. Shinku's head snapped up as she realised her mistake, and she frowned down at the cup in her hand.

Why did I just say that? How could I forget that Jun isn't at home?

"Ohhhh…" drawled Suiseiseki, after a few moments. "Oh oh ohhh…"

"What?" the fifth doll snapped tersely, her eyes flashing with irritation. The Gardener slapped a hand on her hip and waggled her finger in the blonde's face.

"I get it now, Shinku…I get it now, why you've been so boring and quiet and depressed lately."

"Depressed? Since when have I been depressed?"

"Oh, come on, even Kanati agrees that you've been moping around all day lately."

"It's Kanaria!"

Suiseiseki ignored the green-haired doll and instead leaned in close to Shinku with widened eyes.

"You always have this gloomy look on your face, you hardly ever smile anymore…well, I suppose you never do usually anyway…and you don't talk to anyone either!"

"I haven't the faintest idea what you have been talking about," said Shinku, her tone and face carefully neutral.

"Awww, pish," Kanaria snorted. "You've constantly got your nose buried in some book or disappearing off along into the N-field without letting any of us come along with you, and you're even starting to get sleep deprivation."

"As much as I hate to admit it, I agree with Kanabana just this once – "

"KA-NA-RI-A!"

"– Shinku, you are so totally having withdrawal symptoms, and I think you know why," Suiseiseki smirked, like she'd just discovered the ultimate purpose of life. "Looks like I'm not the only one who misses the chibi."

Shinku's eyes hardened and she thrust her teacup at Kanaria.

"You. Go and make me tea," she commanded, her tone frosty.

"Shinkuuu…" Suiseiseki sang, shuffling up close to the blonde on the couch. "How much longer are you going to be in de-nial~?"

"I'm going to Jun's room." Shinku said shortly, snapping the book shut and tucking it under her arm, before marching up the stairs, face tight with irritation. Suiseiseki decided to take that as a sign of victory.

It looked like there was someone who was missing Jun even more than she was.


Mmmm...wish I could have made that better. Please read and review! I'll try update soon as I can ;P