November
Melinda was in the last five minutes of her Monday morning tai-chi class when she felt the pair of eyes watching her from the door. Not that she needed to turn around to see who it was. She and Maria had shared their lunch break almost every Monday for the past two years, and often found themselves sitting in the small café next door; the pouring rain outside would do nothing to hamper Maria in her quest to consume enough coffee that she could function following a weekend off.
Maria leaned against the door frame and grinned as her friend led the class through their final motions, encouraging the careful control of inhalation and exhalation, before calling an end to the session. No matter how many times she ran the session, and how often the same moves were repeated, Melinda was always filled with a sense of peace once it was over.
As the last attendee left the room, Maria walked in, smiling in greeting as Melinda began to pile away the yoga mats the class had used.
"I assume coffee is needed?" Melinda asked, taking one look at Maria and knowing full well where they were heading.
"God yes. I swear I'm still hung-over from Friday."
"Is that even possible?"
"I didn't think so, not until I woke up on Saturday afternoon feeling like I'd had a lobotomy, and swore never to drink again."
"Bullshit, you'll be out again next weekend."
"Probably true."
Melinda threw a look at her over her shoulder, and Maria shrugged.
"Okay, definitely true, but let me just pretend for now."
She rolled her eyes as she piled the last of the mats away into the corner of the room, and turned back to face her.
"So, where did you go after the bar?"
"This 80's themed club down on 7th."
"80's? Really?"
"I think so?"
"You think?" she asked, a smirk spreading across her face. "That bodes well."
"Well it's not my fault, Izzie insisted we go out after the bar closed and –"
"- and naturally you thought it would be a great idea considering how much you'd already drank."
"Naturally." The grin was back. "From what I remember it was pretty good."
"And how much do you remember?" Melinda asked. She knew full well she'd received several text messages at around 4am that she'd struggled to decipher, including one with a photograph attached of what appeared to show Maria and a friend pole dancing.
"Not a lot… there might have been shots?" The look on Melinda's face made Maria continue quickly, clearly skipping a lot of what had happened before she gave her more ammunition to blackmail her with. "Anyway the last thing I remember was calling Steve to come and get me."
"At what? 5am?"
"Yeah."
"And he came?"
"Yeah, bless him, he got up and walked down to the club."
"You must be a pain to live with, remind me again how you convinced him to marry you?"
Maria grinned and Melinda simply rolled her eyes. The two of them headed out from the studio, pausing momentarily to allow Melinda to lock the door behind her, before walking off towards the main entrance.
"Speaking of marriage Mel," Maria said, as they exited the gym area and arrived at reception "End of the month, Saturday the 29th? We're going dress shopping."
Melinda now groaned. Shopping with Maria generally was bad enough; the woman had a habit of going into multiple stores over the course of a day to try clothes and shoes on, before deciding she actually wanted an item she'd seen in the first shop they'd visited. Melinda could only imagine how much fun bridesmaid's dress shopping would be.
"Don't look at me like that, you're coming" Maria said seeing the expression on Melinda's face, who immediately tried, and failed, to change it for one that looked more supportive. "I know you don't do dresses but this one is important."
"I know" she sighed, mentally imagining being forced into a dress made of chiffon and lace, and momentarily feeling slightly queasy. "I know it is, I'll be there don't worry."
"Good." Maria held open the main entrance door for her and they headed out into the rain. "Oh, and Mel? You're not wearing your leather jacket over it either."
TEXT: Hi, Phil? It's Melinda, person you threw drinks at last weekend? X
TEXT: Not sure that's quite how it went down cat-woman. X
TEXT: Keep telling yourself that captain. I assume you'd like your jacket back? X
TEXT: Despite how good you looked in it, yes please. X
Melinda looked down at her phone with a small smile. Was he flirting with her? They were flirting weren't they? Had she come off flirty when they had met? She tried to focus back on Halloween; he'd seemed nice enough despite the cocktail disaster. But being her best friend's brother was a slight issue; didn't that break some kind of moral code? She shrugged and carried on – it was only texting.
TEXT: You want to meet this week sometime? X
TEXT: I have Thursdays off. You free then? X
TEXT: I'm working in the morning, but am free from 1 till 3? X
TEXT: Perfect. I'm coming to the centre anyway, meet you at reception? X
TEXT: Okay, will see you then x
TEXT: See you then cat-woman x
When Melinda walked into reception on Thursday afternoon, about ten minutes later than she should have arrived, she was expecting Phil to be there waiting for her.
What she wasn't expecting was the small child clinging to one of his legs. It took Melinda few moments to realise she must have been his daughter. On second thoughts, of course she was his daughter. Maria had mentioned a few months back how she was glad Phil was moving closer because it meant she would be able to spend more time with her niece, but Melinda hadn't really given it another thought. And for some reason, the two things didn't click when she met him the other night.
"Hey" she called out, moving behind the reception desk and taking a file down from one of the shelves behind it.
"Is it bad I'm slightly disappointed you don't have cat eyes anymore?" he replied in greeting, as he walked over to her hand in hand with his little girl. At a guess, Melinda thought the child must have only been around four or five.
"Yeah, a little." She smiled at him, coming back round to the front of the desk, before turning to the kid. "Hey" she said quietly, bending down so she was more at her height. "It's Lola right?"
The girl smiled shyly and gave a small nod, before hiding behind Phil's leg again.
"Maria mentioned there was a kids aqua class at half-past, so I thought I'd book Lola in and see how she likes it."
"It's a good class" Melinda said, standing back up to face him. "And Sharon who runs it is great with the kids, always playing games and everything… she'll love it."
"You still want to go?" Phil asked, looking back at his daughter with a smile. Melinda couldn't help but see the resemblance; the kid had Phil's smile and blue eyes, but the caramel hues glinting in her hair were definitely not his. And either she took after her father's love of comic books, or he pushed it on her, but Melinda could see she was wearing an "Avengers" tee-shirt under her coat.
Lola nodded, smiling back, before looking at Melinda curiously.
"Is Auntie Maria here?"
"She's in her office" Melinda said. "I can ask her to come out when I get your dad's jacket?"
"Yes please."
"Okay" she looked back to Phil with a small smile. "I'll be back in a moment."
Melinda walked back across reception and through the doors leading to the staff areas. She'd brought his jacket in that morning and hung it in her locker to stop anyone else taking it, so once she retrieved it, she set off to find Maria. She knew her friend wasn't on her lunch break, but had a feeling she would appreciate the distraction greatly, especially given the amount of work she was doing at the moment.
"Hey," Melinda said, coming to a stop once she reached Maria's office. "There's an adorable kid in reception asking for her aunt."
"Is it half 1 already?" she asked, looking up from the pile of paperwork on her desk. Melinda would hate to sit behind a desk and spend her life doing administration and signing off on things, but Maria was determined and ambitious, and was hoping to become manager within the next few years. "Wow, alright, I'm coming." Maria threw down her pen, following Melinda out of the room and back to reception.
"How's my favourite niece?" she called as soon as they got through the door.
"I'm your only niece" Lola replied with a giggle, running over to her and jumping into her arms.
"Yeah? You're still my favourite. So you ready for your first pool party kid?"
"Yeahhh!"
"Awesome. You want me to take her through to get changed?" she asked, flickering her gaze between Phil and Melinda as though she knew something they didn't.
"Yeah, thanks Maria. See you later Lo."
"Bye dad!"
Maria took her niece's hand, and with a wave to Phil, the two headed off through the double doors leading to the gym.
"She's so cute."
Phil grinned happily after his daughter, despite the door having already closed behind her. "She's amazing."
Melinda could hear the notes of pride in his voice, and had to smile. "How old is she?"
"Almost five now, I can't believe it."
"Must be so nice, having someone looking up to you for everything."
"Yeah, I mean, it's hard sometimes, doing this on my own, but she's worth it."
Melinda realised with a jolt that she already knew he had raised Lola on his own. Maria had mentioned to her a few years ago that her brother's wife had died in a car accident, but once again, it was something she had somehow managed to momentarily forget.
"Your jacket" she said, handing it to him with a small smile before she said something to upset him. "Thanks again."
"No problem, again I'm sorry for the spillage."
"It wasn't your fault, seriously, stop apologising for it."
"Sorry."
He grinned sheepishly, before dragging a hand through his hair. "Are you… are you free for a bit now?"
Melinda looked at him. "Yeah, until 3…why?"
"I've got an hour until Lola's class finishes…would you like to go for coffee or something?"
She smiled. "Sure."
Twenty minutes later and the two were sat opposite each other in a small coffee shop down the road, watching the raindrops trickling down the window panes. He'd originally ordered her a coffee, which in all honesty Melinda possessed a strong dislike for, but he had paid for it (despite her protests), so she was planning to drink it just to be polite, but when he saw her face her realised his mistake. Five minutes later and she had a steaming mug of green tea in front of her, and Phil had made a few joke remarks about drinks being cursed around the two of them.
It was comfortable really, considering the fact it was only the second time they had met, but Melinda wondered whether it was because she knew Maria so well that she felt like she already sort of knew Phil.
"So how long have you worked with my sister?"
"About three years now." Melinda sometimes struggled to believe it had only been that length of time; often it felt like a lot longer.
"You're one of the bridesmaids for her wedding aren't you?"
She nodded in response, taking another sip of her tea, feeling it warming her through after their walk in the rain.
"I remember a few months back she gave our mum a list of who was doing what at the wedding" Phil continued. "I knew all the others, but didn't recognise your name."
"I don't really know many of her other friends, so it might be a bit weird."
"They're okay," he replied, a small smile on his face. "A bit wild when they all get together, but they're nice really."
"Wild like Maria gets?"
"Yeah."
"Great" she replied sarcastically. She loved Maria, she really did, but a room full of people just like her could be slightly too much to bear.
Phil laughed, clearly in the knowledge of exactly what a party animal his sister and her friends could be when they got going.
He'd removed his coat once they had arrived, and it now lay with his spare jacket across the back of a spare chair at their table. Melinda had been quite surprised when he had taken it off, revealing a pair of well-toned arms that she had not realised he had been hiding, and had not noticed before. She had to force herself to keep her eyes on his face.
"So, you've just moved here?"
"Yeah, about a month ago now."
"You liking it much?"
"It's nice," he replied, smiling a little as he took another sip of coffee. "It's a bit quieter than Portland, but I think we'll be okay."
"Why'd you move?"
"Closer to family" he said quietly, but the way he avoided looking at her when he answered made Melinda realise it was probably something to do with losing his wife.
"And does Lola like it?" she asked, changing the subject quickly. She wasn't sure if he knew that she was aware of what had happened to his family, but she didn't think it wise to bring itup today.
"I hope she will," he replied, turning back to face her again. "We've not had much chance to explore yet, but I've got her enrolled in a local playgroup – she goes Monday to Wednesday - and Maria said there was a park nearby that she'd like so -"
"- It's just round the corner from here."
"How close?"
"Literally about ten minutes away." Melinda pulled her phone out of her pocket and checked the time. "I can show you if you want? It's on the way back to the centre anyway."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah, why not."
They finished the remainder of their drinks and Phil put his coat back on. Melinda grabbed her umbrella from the chair next to her, and the two headed out. He held the door for her again, as he had on their way in, like a proper gentleman, and as she passed him with a small smile, she had to remind herself that this was just a casual meeting, nothing more.
The rain had finally ceased, and the November sun was trying it's best to fight through the mass of swirling grey clouds above. The temperature however, was still pretty low, and Phil could feel the nip of the wind against his face as the two of them walked towards the park.
Melinda turned them down a small footpath lined with trees, and as she walked she occasionally kicked a pile of wet leaves, just like a child would do. The scent of damp earth filled Phil's nostrils as they moved, and he took a deep breath.
"This is amazing. It's so…green around here."
She raised an eyebrow at him as she looked at their surroundings.
"Okay, well not right now. Now everything is orange and dead and autumn-y."
"Is that even a word?"
"Of course."
She laughed slightly as they carried on, and Phil could see the pink tinge to her cheeks the cool air left behind. She was gorgeous; he'd thought she looked great when she'd been dressed up, but out here in the autumn light, he couldn't keep his eyes off her. Phil had a feeling she was one of those people who had no idea about the effect she had on others.
"But it'll be green again one day," he continued, before she saw him watching her. "That's what I meant."
"It's a good place to come and relax sometimes," she said after a while. "I like it… it's peaceful."
A few more steps and they rounded the corner, entering the park itself.
Phil could imagine what the area would look like in a few weeks' time as winter arrived, the freezing cold forming crystal icicles on every tree, the fields covered in a blanket of snow deep enough that Lola would be able to throw herself into it and make snow-angels. They could come here, and have a snowball fight, just like in the Christmas movies they always watched together. Then in the summer, there would be kids playing and laughing, families having picnics and food fights in the long grasses as the sun shone down, and evenings spent watching dragonflies dance over the dewy blades towards the pond on the other side.
He smiled as he took it all in.
Lola would love it.
They walked in silence for a bit on the way back, but despite how little they knew each other, Phil was surprised that it didn't feel awkward at all. It felt almost, natural.
"So what made you decide to teach self-defence?" he asked eventually, after the whirlwind of thoughts running through his head convinced him he was genuinely interested in the life of the woman walking beside him; that hadn't happened since…well, since he'd met Audrey really.
"Long story short?" she replied, halting in her path and brushing her dark hair from her face, staring at some unknown spot in the distance. "Something happened, and it made me realise that everybody should be able to defend themselves if need be."
He looked at her carefully, but she turned away and kept walking, so he dropped it. Before she had looked away though, he could have sworn he'd seen a flash of anger in her eyes, but as soon as it had appeared it was gone again.
Phil had to remind himself that the only reason they were actually here was technically so he could get his jacket back; they barely knew one another, and he had no right to dig through her past if she didn't want to talk about it. Which, from the firm tone of her reply, she did not. And anyway, it wasn't as though he didn't have his own tragic backstory.
By the time they arrived back at the centre, it was almost half 2, and Phil decided to wait in reception for Maria to bring Lola back out.
"Thanks for showing me the park" he said gratefully, as Melinda wandered back around the reception desk to check out the details of her next class. "She's going to love it; I might take her this weekend."
"She will" Melinda agreed with a small smile. "And no problem, thanks for the tea."
"It was nice, wasn't it?"
The way he phrased it made her think he wasn't just talking about the drinks. "The tea, or…?"
"All of it."
She looked over to see him watching her, a small smile on his face. She couldn't help but smile back, knowing full well she hadn't actually smiled so much in a very long time.
"Yeah," she agreed. "It was."
They both stood in silence for a few moments, the only sounds being the hum of the heater in the far corner, desperately working to keep the area at a semi-warm temperature, and the distant sound of music, no doubt from a currently running aerobic or dance class in one of the studios.
"Would you like to do it again, sometime?"
Melinda looked at him, a small feeling of butterflies stirring in her lower stomach. She wanted to meet him again, badly, and she had no idea just how much until the moment he asked.
"Yes, I would" she admitted.
"Me too."
It became almost a routine. The next two Thursdays, they repeated the previous weeks' activities. First, Phil dropped Lola off at her kids aqua class, Maria took her through, and then he and Melinda headed out to the local café. The only difference each week being that as it headed towards the latter half of November, the wintery chill in the air got more prominent.
As they chatted, the two gradually discovered new things about one another. She asked him about his job, what he did, and was surprised to find out he was also a teacher, although high school history wasn't exactly the same as kick-boxing. Phil said it was hard, being the new teacher in the area, because a lot of the students thought they could mess about in his classes, and he was struggling to keep a few of them motivated, especially in the build up to Christmas.
Lola was almost five, and Phil talked about her a lot. It was clear to Melinda that his daughter was the focal point of his life, and he adored her, but she could tell he was extremely protective over her. Almost, over-protective. But she brushed it off as it being because she was an only child. Melinda didn't talk to Lola much herself, only a hello each time the two of them arrived in reception each week, and she would ask how her aqua class had gone, but she still liked the kid. And apparently Lola was enjoying her life in their new house, and hadn't really asked about Portland, which Phil was relieved about. On Saturday afternoons he took her to the park Melinda had shown him, and casually slipped into conversation that if Melinda ever wanted to, she was welcome to join them both on these outings.
She'd smiled and thanked him for the offer, but came up with an excuse when he did. She wasn't sure why exactly, because she did like him, and the kid, but deep down she told herself it was just because they were a family, and she didn't want to intrude on their time together.
Phil told her he had Thursdays and weekends off with his daughter, and that she went to his mother's each Friday.
Melinda knew his mother. She'd met her a couple of times over the past few years, either when she'd been round at Maria's house, or when the two had been out on one of Maria's shopping trips, and she liked her. Anne Coulson was lovely, and Phil seemed strangely happy that Melinda already knew her.
She told Phil about her own life, that she was an only child, that she had been raised by her mother alone and that they had moved a lot due to her mother's work. Melinda had never really been one for sharing her life story, but she found it quite easy to talk to him about the places she had lived, and the things she had done. She mentioned her room-mate, and talked a bit about some of her other friends.
It was natural.
He still held the door for her each week, and the butterflies she'd felt when he'd first asked her to meet again came back when she saw him.
Each time they said goodbye to one another, they promised to meet up again.
The last Thursday in November came around faster than they even realised, and once more they embarked on their routine.
The two left the café just as they had previously, and without even really thinking about it, wandered around to the local park again. Only this time, instead of leaving and returning to the centre, they ended up sitting side by side on a bench, overlooking the rest of the park. Somehow, and Melinda wasn't sure how it had happened, they were talking about Phil's life back in Portland, and after a few moments of silence, she knew he was debating whether to say something.
"What?"
He looked at her. "What?"
"I can almost hear you biting back your words."
"How much do you know about Lola's mother?" he asked, when it appeared his words had found a way out.
Melinda hadn't known for sure that was what had been on his mind, but she'd had a feeling. They'd spoken about most other things, but his wife had been one topic she had avoided bringing up, for fear of causing him unnecessary pain.
"Maria… she told me that she died a few years ago." Melinda had sorted through her memories to recall that conversation a few weeks ago. Maria had been visibly upset one morning, following a day off work, and when Melinda questioned her on it, she told her she had been to the memorial that was held each year. That had been the third one she had been to.
"Did she tell you how?
"She said it was a car accident" Melinda replied quietly.
"True," he nodded slowly in her peripheral vision. "But it wasn't exactly an accident as such…it was…I mean…"His words trailed off, as though stolen by the wind, and she turned to see him looking into the distance, a slight frown forming between his eyes.
"Phil, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to" she said quietly, gently resting a gloved hand on his arm without thinking about it.
"No, it's okay," he replied, smiling sadly at her. "I need to talk about it more… bottling it up doesn't help."
"I understand."
"Do you mind?"
"No." She wouldn't want him to tell her if he didn't feel it was right, but if he was comfortable about it, then she would leave that decision up to him. "If you want to tell me, you can."
"I feel like you should know… in case we ever… you know… it's kind of why I'm so protective over Lola too."
He sighed, shaking his head slightly, before looking into the distance.
"Audrey, she used to be in the Portland Symphony Orchestra, she played cello. There was this man; he went to all of the shows. At first she was flattered, you know? But then she opened the curtains one night and he was stood outside our house."
Melinda swallowed, a shiver that had nothing to do with the cold snaking down her spine. She pulled her coat closer with one hand, as though wrapping herself up would protect from his words.
"We called the police, naturally, and they warned him to stay away, but he didn't. He began stalking her. Then one weekend, she was out with her parents, in the car… from the CCTV recovered, they must have realised he was tailing them a few cars back. Her father pulled out to overtake but…"
Phil swallowed hard and closed his eyes, and Melinda tightened her grip on his arm.
"Audrey was killed on impact, as were both her parents. Just like that, half a family gone." He shook his head hard, as though clearing the images from his mind. "But somehow," he continued, taking a deep breath and looking at her again with a small smile. "Through some unknown miracle, Lola survived."
Melinda gasped, eyes wide in shock.
"She was in the car?! How old was she?"
"Almost three months."
She sat in stunned silence, not even sure how to comprehend everything he'd told her.
"It hurts that she doesn't remember her mother," Phil added quietly, "but at the same time, in a way I'm glad, because…"
"Because memories like that are not something anybody should live with."
"Exactly." He looked back at her as he realised the way she spoke suggested she personally knew about haunting memories, but after a few seconds she dropped his gaze and instead watched a group of children playing on the slide across from them. "Anyway," Phil continued, "I got sick of people looking at me differently in the street, looking at us differently, like we were about to break."
"That's why you moved."
"Yeah."
"I'm so sorry Phil."
He placed his hand over her own, which was still holding onto his arm, and smiled gently at her. In his expression she could see sorrow, but there was also hope, and she swallowed as his blue eyes seemed to convey every emotion he felt straight into her soul.
"It's been over four years. It's time to move on."
It wasn't harsh, the way he said it, it was reality. Living in the past did nothing, and he had a daughter to raise the best he could.
For a while, nothing else was said. They sat side by side and just watched other people in the park, letting the crisp afternoon breeze wash around them, sending stray leaves dancing across their feet. At some point, Phil linked their fingers together, and Melinda didn't stop him.
They walked back to the centre hand in hand.
Melinda told herself it was just to provide him some comfort, support for what he'd been through, but deep inside, she knew it wasn't.
And that thought both scared and excited her.
TEXT: So, to apologise for depressing you so much today with my tragic backstory, would you let me take you out again, but properly? I'll be more cheerful, honest! X
TEXT: I guess it depends, if there is no tragic backstory, are you planning to pour more drinks all over me instead? X
TEXT: I'll try to resist, but I can't promise anything…. X
TEXT: I'll hold you to that! X
TEXT: Is that a yes? :) X
TEXT: That's a yes Phil. X
TEXT: Great! :) Are you free next Friday night? The 5th? Lola will be at my mother's… X
Melinda looked down at her phone and thought. Friday Night? He wanted to take her out properly at night. Something told her this wasn't going to just be a case of a few casual drinks; it was a date. She hadn't been on a proper date in a long time mainly because she wasn't very good at them, always running out of things to say or feeling uncomfortable. She could feel the nerves in her stomach bundling together. But this was with Phil, and Phil was nice, he was charming, he was attractive. And they had things in common didn't they? And the last few times they had met, the conversation had flowed fine. It would be okay. No big deal.
TEXT: Should be fine, so, where abouts we going? X
TEXT: There's this a new Italian opened in the town centre? X
TEXT: Sounds good. Let me know a time. X
TEXT: Will do. I'll see you next week Melinda :) XX
"What are you smiling at?"
"Nothing" Melinda replied, throwing her phone back onto the sofa beside her and looking up to find her roommate smirking. Natasha had only been back a few days, but already Melinda missed the peace and quiet that was lost every time the Russian made base for a few more weeks.
"Bullshit."
Natasha glanced from Melinda to the phone and back again, before pouncing forwards to the sofa to grab it. Melinda fought back, not quite sure why she didn't want Natasha to read her messages, but the Russian was quicker, and she then stood with a grin as she flicked through Melinda's phone.
"Phil? Who's Phil?"
"He's…"
"Oh my God, Phil as in Maria's brother, Phil?"
Melinda looked back to the television, despite it currently showing nothing but a blank screen, as though nothing else were happening. "Maybe."
"Does she know?"
"There's nothing to know, it's probably just a few drinks."
"A few drinks? Yeah right. Melinda May is going on a date, a proper date…. have you seen the smile on your face?"
"Shut up Natasha."
Please let me know your thoughts!
