Me: Listen, I'm REALLY sorry it took me a long time to update!
Sakura: Too much school work she says.
Me: it's only true!
Hinata: Especially with her report card.
Me: HEY!
Temari: It's not her fault that you got a C!
Me: JERKS!
Tenten: You didn't even get an A!
Me: YES I DID!
Ino: Oh yeah! WHEN!
Me: In math!
Temari: You got a 93, and that was only because of last minutes 5 extra credit!
Me: But it was still an A!
Sakura: Um… not really…
Me: DO you want to be with Gaara?!
Sakura: I am sorry.
Ino: And I am going with Kankuro!
Temari: AND I'M WITH SHIKA-KUN!
Temari: Squeal
Me: Alright, here's the second chapter of 'My Ten Ways to Steal Gaara from Sakura Haruno'!
Ino: This is not in Matsuri's P.O.V, but in Violet's!
Temari: Violet does not own Naruto.
Matsuri was crouching from behind a bush, watching the couple in disgust. She was looking at one in disgust, and one in admiration.
'Soon Gaara-kun, soon you shall be mine!' Matsuri cackled inside of her mind.
'Now… my brilliant plan! Humiliate her!' Matsuri screamed into her mind again, and took out a huge blue piece of paper. It was her blueprints of her plan.
'Humiliate her by spreading a rumor about her,' Matsuri reread in her mind.
Matsuri cackled again, only this time out loud. Many Sand shinobi stared at her, and someone threw a rock at her.
"SOME PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO ENJOY THEIR TIME AT THE PARK!" a man cried out, immediately hushed by his wife.
"Come on dear, don't scare the children," his wife told him, shooing him to the nearby lake.
Sakura and Gaara stared at the husband and wife, before following them to the lake.
Sakura giggled and Gaara smiled a small smile. He kissed her on the cheek as she giggled some more.
Matsuri glared at Sakura. Not only was her giggle cute, but Gaara had kissed her! 'Even if it was only on the cheek, NO one gets kissed by Gaara, except for me!' Matsuri thought possessively.
She smiled evilly at her plans, and started tip toeing towards the couple. They were standing in front of the lake, Sakura's head resting on Gaara's shoulder.
Matsuri smirked and used a ninjutsu to turn herself into a big, hairy man who had a beard and looked like he was drunk.
She came out of the bushes, swinging to the side, back and forth, back and forth, acting like she was drunk.
"AHH!" Sakura screamed as the big man (otherwise known as Matsuri), hit her, making her fall into the lake.
Sakura made hand signs so fast that no one could see them. Matsuri thought while rolling her eyes, 'It's useless. You'll never be able to stop yourself from falling into the lake… heh… you're wearing a white shirt so that seriously will embarrass you.'
As Matsuri smirked, waiting for Sakura to fall into the lake, her eyes widened as the tips of Sakura's hair were touching the water, but the rest of her wasn't. Sakura's heels were bent back, chakara keeping her on top of the water, her normal strength and flexibility keeping her from falling in.
Matsuri swore under her breath and saw Gaara help Sakura up. Many people clapped for Sakura's swiftness, and Gaara checked if she was okay. Once he found out she was alright, he glared at Matsuri. Matsuri shrunk under his glare, and felt her temperature drop, and she turned an unhealthy pale.
"Why'd you push my girlfriend?" Gaara asked calmly, but you could see his eyes meant 'I'm going to kill you punk.'
She was scared, and felt like she was about to pee her pants. She started swinging again, hoping that it would stall time.
"Don't worry sis… I'm not drunk!' she said, trying to sound drunk. She thought, 'Hopefully he'll think I'm drunk…'
Gaara twitched, believing that she/he was drunk. She smiled in her mind, but frowned after she saw Gaara lift his hand.
The events after that were blank to her, and she felt her left eye swelling.
'Ow! My Gaara-kun! Why'd you punch me! I know you love me!' Matsuri thought in her mind, crying chibi tears that she thought looked cute, but it made her look like a retard.
Sakura sweat dropped at Gaara's action, and looked at the new black eye that man had.
Sakura glared at him and slapped him over the head.
"Gaara-kun! He's drunk, he didn't mean it!" Sakura yelled at Gaara.
While Sakura lectured him, Gaara rolled his eyes and kissed her.
Sakura blushed and he slowly retreated.
"Will you PLEASE stop talking now?" Gaara asked, crossing his arms.
"Um… sure?" Sakura replied unsurely.
Gaara gave her a small smile and took her hand. They walked down to the Chinese stand to pick up take out because well people, face it… Temari can't cook.
Matsuri walked back home and immediately went to her freezer.
'Well, plan 1… failed. A big, FAT, juicy F,' Matsuri thought, putting a bag of frozen peas on her swelling eye.
Me: Alright, I am SO sorry it took me so long to update!
Sakura: But it is her spring break so she should be able to finish up the story.
Ino: The stupid teacher gave her EXTRA homework, just because she didn't like her!
Tenten: She's just hated by the teacher because the teacher hated her brother.
Hinata: Violet wants to thank all of you awesome reviewers!
Temari: This story has gotten WAY MORE reviews than her other ones.
Gaara: Why am I here again?
Kankuro: Violet dragged us both here…
Shikamaru: I don't want to be here.
Neji: Do you know anyone who does?
Me, Sakura, Ino, Tenten, Hinata, Temari: US!
Lee: GOOD FOR YOU! I AM HAPPY TO BE HERE TOO! THE YOUTHFULLNESS FLOWS THROUGH VIOLET'S VEINS!
Sakura: Alright, come join us next time for My Ten Ways!
Me: But we need to add something to the end…
Hinata: Bloopers?
Temari: Yeah, but when she tried to put on the bloopers for the 'Friends Forever' story, which didn't pair Shikamaru-kun and me, they sort of… SUCKED!
Me: HEY!
Ino: How about we just try to let her try again?
Hinata: Alright…
Tenten: Sure.
Sakura: Might as well.
Temari: I have nothing better to do.
Gaara: As long as I didn't mess up.
Kankuro: Please, you messed up more than me!
Neji: That's only because you and I haven't been in the story yet.
Me: Oh, you're just mentioned, you don't actually show up.
Neji: Jerk…
Naruto: HEY! WHY WASN'T I HERE IN THE BEGINNING?!
Me: What?
Naruto: I DON'T KNOW!
Me: Alright, let's try my failed attempt of bloopers!
Bloopers are in bold and italics.
Matsuri chucked evilly to herself outloud, and some guy threw a rock at her. Instead of hitting her, it hit a tiger that pounced on him. Everyone started spazzing out and then the guy and the tiger stopped.
"APRIL FOOLS!" he called out. The tiger bowed and smiled a cheeky smile.
"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT YOU MORON?! IT ISN'T EVEN APRIL!" Sakura yelled.
"Exactly, you would NEVER suspect April Fool's pranks in the summer!" the guy yelled out, giving them the peace sign.
Sakura sweat dropped and punched him.
"Don't worry Crazy, the nice men in the white coats will take you away," Sakura said soothingly and called the 'nice mean in the white coats'. They took him away, avoiding the kicks and punches and words he threw saying he wasn't crazy.
Matsuri acted like a drunkard and pushed Sakura into the lake. Sakura was currently texting on her cell phone, and forgot to focus chakara into her feet.
"What the he…" Sakura called out before screaming.
She fell into the lake, her cell phone electrocuting her.
Matsuri, Gaara, and everyone in the park started to laugh, and Sakura started to tear up.
"GAARA HOW COULD YOU?!" Sakura yelled, crying.
Gaara stopped laughing and glared at everyone.
"Stop laughing," he said coolly.
Everyone started to stifle in new giggles that were forming.
Behind him was an evil looking Sakura, with the word 'Inner' across her forehead.
"SHANNARO!" Inner Sakura who took over Outer Sakura yelled.
Inner Sakura strangled Gaara. Gaara was turning a unhealthy shade of blue, which scared Matsuri and everyone else.
Gaara moved his arms weakly and fished his hand into his pocket.
Gaara threw up something in the air which made Inner Sakura look at it and drop him on his butt.
"STARBURT JELLY BEANS!" Sakura and Inner yelled as they gobbled it up.
"Violet! You're dead!" Gaara yelled as he threw a rock at the video camera.
Me: Told you they sucked.
Tenten: Um… no they don't?
Temari: Cough Cough Liar Cough
Ino: Are you coming down with a cold or something?
Sakura: Idiot…
Hinata: Join us next time!
Me: I'll try to finish this by April 1st
