A/N: So after writing "Blessed Regret" last night, I knew it couldn't end there, and now after writing this part, I know it can't end here either. I guess that means my once one-shot is turning out to be a three-shot… hope you don't mind : ).
A/N2: This part is a bit shorter but most of the backgroung is covered in the first chapter so definetely refer to that if you get lost.
Regretful Blessings
It's simple really. All the moments of your life can be summed into two categories: the ones you regret and the ones that made you question how you got to be so blessed.
For Jennifer Jareau those moments of regret in her life had always outweighed her blessed ones.
The time she stole her brother's video game and ran it under the sink before placing it carefully in the back of the freezer, he didn't talk to her for a week. The time her father caught her stealing a candy bar from the local grocery store, the look of disappointment in his eyes tore holes through her. Or when she had to place the photograph of another young girl about her age on the power point slide labeled 'victims', the file had been on her desk for weeks before the girl was found murdered.
All of those regrets in Jennifer Jareau's life had made her to question her judgment, every ounce of herself even.
That is until she got her first glimpse of the flawless brunette striding after her boss in the direction of the conference room, adamantly stating the BAU was where she was suppose to be.
Yes, the first time she saw Emily Prentiss in her perfectly fitted slacks and pristinely tailored jacket that hugged the curve of her body as if both were cut from the same materiel, JJ thought maybe, just maybe, her judgment wasn't completely screwed up.
Like all the other relationships between objects in the natural world: good and evil, ying and yan, you cannot have one without at least a small part of the other.
For JJ those tiny parts were her blessings. The moment she saw a nervous Emily drop to her knee while pulling out a breathtaking ring from her pocket to ask those four amazing words, the way Emily's hair felt against her shoulder on a long plane ride home, the feeling that a simple glance from her wife's chocolate eyes sent her weak at the knees every time.
It was those moments that made JJ to forget her uneven scale of life.
Because as long as she was able to hold onto her tiny blessings, the numerous burdens of regret could wait.
Feeling the release of warmth from her hand, JJ knew what came next. She fought, just as she did every time she felt Emily's hand slip from hers, to open her eyes and scream for her not to leave, but just like every time before… she lost that battle.
Time is a funny thing when you have only your limited senses of touch and hearing to rely on. It's not like someone is willing to sit beside you and meticulously count out every tick of the clock. JJ was actually most grateful no one did that, however, she figured a nice time hack every now and then would be nice.
But forced to rely on her ears and the simple touch of a hand in hers, JJ quickly mastered the routine of her life.
She measured morning by the casual break in Emily's tired voice, as her wife paused to take sips of her black coffee before continuing to talk to JJ about anything and everything. Morning was broken into mid-day with the light whisper of lips on her forehead and the release of Emily's hand which was quickly replaced by another hand she was so fond of. And for a predictable amount of time, she would listen as her best friend jabbered on about her deep desire to sexually attack a certain dark co-worker. Those talks with Garcia made her smile, well inwardly she thought at least. It was what her friend asked of her at the end of their conversation that broke JJ's heart. She wanted more than anything than to tell Pen she was right there, right there in front of her, and she needed them all too. But again that was a fight she lost every day.
The parts of time JJ feared the most were the moments that felt like hours when she was left alone with only the beeping of machines and imposing swish from the tube that filled her lungs with air. The bright walls of her conscious seemed to close tighter around her and the regrets of her life threatened to swallow her whole…
But as always, just as she was about to slip away completely into the blinding white light, her heroine swooped down to save her, whisking her safely back to the land of the living. She had always marveled at how the simple touch of Emily's hand, could save her over and over again.
It was that instant of everyday JJ looked forward to, because as is customary with routine, it always comes.
And for JJ it was a reminder of the one great blessing of her life.
Flashback…
JJ heard the door at the back of the house being broken down.
She felt the arm around her throat tighten as her friends set up positions just inside the living room to her left.
Then she saw her, and it was like the first time she had seen her in the bullpen all over again.
Emily's presence meant it would all be ok.
She held in a gasp as the barrel of the 9mm that had been pressed to her temple slowly caressed the side of her face.
She heard the amused laugh of the bastard that held her captive as he toyed with the torment of her wife and team.
She pulled Emily's eyes to hers.
JJ fought to assure her everything would be alright, as a single tear slid down her cheek.
JJ would kill the bastard for putting her wife through this hell.
That's when she saw it just out of the corner of her eye.
She didn't have time to think, she didn't need to.
She took her moment of opportunity to pull from Williams' grasp, turning abruptly to face him.
Her only felling was of hot metal against her chest.
Her ears only registered a sharp crack in the deafening silence, but her heart filled with relief as she felt familiar arms wrap around her suddenly falling body.
It was like drifting off to sleep after making sure Emily knew how much she loved her. The gently sway of Emily's rocking lulling her further and further away.
She was content to let the darkness overtake her knowing her scale of life had taken a dramatic tip in the favor of blessings…
Emily was safe and there was nothing JJ would ever regret about that.
A/N: I hope this chapter lightened the story a little for everyone. Write me and let me know your thoughts on JJ's POV through it all.
