Well thanks to popular demand I have decided to make this a short story, maybe four or five chapters, but I will only continue if people want me to, so please be sure to review if you want more and thanks to all of those who reviewed and asked for more, glad to know somebody likes my writing. If this makes you cry, I'm sorry, but it made me cry too, so your not alone.

As I stand here looking down to my sleeping child, I began to wonder, is what I'm doing right? It pains my heart knowing this is the last night I have with him, he is a little over seven months and I know that these past few months have been hard, especially without his father.

According to Agent Spender and the doctor's, he's normal. A normal healthy little boy who no longer has his special gift. Which I must admit is a good thing, it scared me not fully understanding the things my son was going through. But now I think about it, is he being normal any better? I mean can I handle him like this? Is he still in danger? I've been thinking about this for the past couple of days, and I know that's why I signed the papers, he needed to be with a family that wasn't broken, two loving parents at his side; and right now I couldn't offer that. It seemed that every time I tried to be his mother, I failed. His life was at risk and we were without his father.

An attempt at ending his life had been made and I knew he was not safe with me, I knew I had to let him go. As he slept I dreamed of a world where he was still mine, I wish there was another way, that somehow this wasn't happening, that I would wake up and he would be in my arms, his father sleeping next to us on the bed, but I know this is just a dream, a dream I will always hold dear in my heart.

He's sleeping peacefully, and I begin to wonder if he knows I'm letting him go. I wonder if he'll understand and want to come home if the time is ever given. Or if he'll hate me for the rest of his life and never want anything to do with me. This is one of the hardest decisions I have ever had to make and it's even harder when the other half responsible for him is not here to tell me it's ok, that what I'm doing is right, or to talk me out of it and tell me to keep him.

I find the tear rolling down my face as I stand watching over him, I've been standing here for what seems like an eternity, but all it's been is fifteen minutes. I refuse to leave his side tonight, knowing that in the morning he will leave mine forever. He seems so innocent, but he has seen so much. I don't want him to see what his father and I have seen. I want to keep him protected and if it means giving him away, I will do all I can to be the mother I have failed to be.

I turn from the stop I stand in and look up, as my eyes travel upward, I see him. He's standing there, in the clothes he left us in. He leans against the doorway to the bedroom as a smile creeps across his face and I loose all control, the tears fall graciously as we stare at each other.

"Tell me what I'm doing is right." I beg him, I need to know from him I'm making the right choice, that he won't hate me. I watch as he approaches me, and rests a hand on my shoulder.

"What you're doing is right." He says giving me the smile that makes me go weak at the knees and with that said I collapse into his embrace and cry into his shoulder as he holds me close and rubs my back.

Soon the cries of William pull me out of my day dream and back to him, I find myself standing in the room, facing the door with tears streaming down my face. It was a dream, a simple little vision, like the one I had had when I found him dead in the forest. It was nice, but I only wished it was real. I needed him here, with me. I needed him to tell me he still loved me and that we would get through this. As the cries continued I walked over to my boy and picked him up. I walked around the apartment and sang him to sleep, but as he drifted into his own world, I did not have the heart to let him go, not yet. So instead I carried him into my room again and placed him on my bed between two pillows, I then laid next him and closed my eyes as I slept there.

That night I dreamt. This one was different than all the others. This one was nice, comforting almost. I stood in a forest, so lush with bright green leaves and trees that stood miles high. I could hear the laughter of his little voice and I saw him run past me and disappear behind the trees. He appeared to be at least eight, he looked just like his father, and I thank god for giving him to me. Soon he was joined by another, only this man was far older. He chased after him laughing and telling him to slow down. I knew Mulder was always meant to be a father and soon he disappeared behind the same tree. It wasn't long until I showed up, I had dirt all over my face and clothes, mud was covered in my hair I was yelling out random things to the two about how pushing me in the mud would result in a mean payback.

I sat on the rock and watched as Mulder and William came back into view and apologized, then I watched as the three of us played in the dirt and leaves. The dream ended with Mulder and I shoving William into a nearby creek before jumping in ourselves. I knew it was a dream, a simple hope, a fantasy I wanted to become a reality, but it never would.

The bright sun woke me the next morning as I awoke to find William fast asleep next to me. I watched him again as he slept. I always found comfort in watching him like this, I felt that I could protect him and nothing bad could happen to him.

That morning after I had showered, I picked William up and I played him with him one last time. I repeatedly told him I loved him, I wasn't sure if he knew what it meant, but I made sure he would always know how I felt. He would smile at me every time I said love and something in me told me he knew. He was smart, he was my son after all. I laughed as he made his way over to a stuffed alien that lay on the floor. It had been a toy his father had given him before he left. As he sucked on his thumb, he held the alien close and smiled as I spoke.

"What you got there, Buddy? You got an alien." His face lit up at the last word, and he raised it up, almost as if he were handing him to me. "No, Will. Spooky is yours." He held it close to his chest again and smiled once more.

It pained me knowing these were the last few hours I would ever have with my son. It killed me to know that I was letting him leave. As a knock on the door sounded, I got up and walked past his bag. In it were his clothes, his toys, his life and as I opened the door, the woman from the adoption agency stood smiling.

"Ms. Scully, I'm here for William." She said, her smile never fading. I walked over to my boy and picked him up, I then walked over to the door and handed the woman the bag, but I couldn't give him up, not just yet.

"I love you William. Don't you ever forget that. You're daddy loves you too." I placed a soft kiss on the top of his head and handed him over as well. His little bunny eared hat rested on his head and I cried as the woman walked off carrying the one thing I loved more than life itself. As I took one last look in his little eyes, I knew that one day I would get him back. That one day he would be mine again.

As he vanished down the hall, I closed my door and ran into my room where I threw myself on the bed and cried. For the next two hours I cried and cried, never once caring about the world outside because without him, there was no world. Finally around noon, I got up from my bed and walked into the bathroom. I washed my face and cleaned up my appearance before I grabbed my keys and walked out the door.

As I approached the house, I parked in the driveway and headed for the door. Along the way I had shed many more tears and I knew they would keep coming until the pain was gone. As I knocked on the door, my mother answered it. She didn't know yet, but when she looked at me, I fell into her arms and cried.

"Where's William?" She asked softly as she lead me into the house.

"He's gone mom. I had to give him up. He needed to be safe, he wasn't safe with me." I watched as tears fell from her eyes and she took me into her arms again, together we cried for hours. I would ask her again and again, how was I going to tell Mulder? Yet she had no answer. For hours we cried and I felt like such a horrible person, but my mom told me exactly what I needed to hear.

"What you did was right and took a lot of guts. By keeping him you would selfish, putting your needs before his. By giving him away you saved him, you made the sacrifice that was best for him. You were a mother." I knew what she said was true and it hard. I cried again and lost myself, I wanted my baby back and I wanted him now.

As the days pass I find myself learning to deal with this. My mother was right, I was given one last chance to be his mother, one last moment to make his life the best and chose it. Keeping him would have been selfish, but is that Mulder would see it? Would he understand everything I did? Could he ever forgive me? Better yet, would I ever see him again to tell him what I've done?

As I sit in my room looking over the few photos I have of our son, I smile. Knowing he's safe and that someday I'll have him back, someday, if not soon, than many years from now. I will have him, his father and I will have him. Like every night I pray, I thank god for giving me such a miracle and I pray for Mulder, I pray he's alright and that he knows I never meant to hurt him. I pray that William will be safe and that I will see him again soon. After praying I crawl into bed and cry myself to sleep.

Please review and let me know if I should continue thanks a million for reviewing you all rock!