Author's Note: I am eternally grateful for your continued support and readership. It not only inspires me to write, it reminds me that I am not alone in missing Alex and Izzie. There will be a few rough spots in this story but then again what story is good without a few rough spots? I hope you enjoy! In regards to a few confusing reviews I want to point out that Alex did not go to Izzie and she didn't get over everything that happened between them. I could explain that second one in detail but won't. The answer is in this chapter. I will say this, the story takes place near Christmas 2011, which means they have been divorced for a year. For those who are interested in this sort of thing, I listened to Chasing Pavements by Adele.
Chapter Two
We can do no great things; only small things with great love - Mother Theresa
Silence wrapped itself around Izzie as she sat on the floor of her closet, staring up at the neatly hung clothes. There was plenty of black and several dresses that were perfect for a funeral; the question was what did one wear to their psychotic ex-father in law's burial? An even bigger question, she mused, was why the hell was she going? The answer was simple. She was a weak-willed, soft-hearted, still loved her ex-husband, first class idiot. That was why she had driven like a bat out of hell to Joe's when he didn't answer his last text and why she had told him she would go with him to Iowa. Regardless of how their marriage had ended, Alex had been there for her during a time when most men would have ran. He had made what could have been the last months of her life amazing. Because of him she'd had her dream wedding. Because of him she had a chance at motherhood. Going to Iowa to help him bury his asshole of a father was the least she could do.
Letting out a sigh, Izzie reached forward to trail her fingers over the hem of a long sleeved black cashmere sweater dress she had modeled for Banana Republic. Paired with some thick black tights and some dressy boots it would work. There wasn't much damage that could be done to it in a suitcase. Another sigh breathed past her slightly parted lips as she forced herself to stand up. She had been sitting there at least twenty minutes. That was twenty minutes too long. It would take her at least thirty minutes to get to Meredith's; which meant she didn't have much time if she wanted to keep within the hour timeframe she had promised Alex.
"You're such a sucker," she muttered as she tossed a standard sized black leather suitcase on her bed. She still couldn't believe she had offered to do this. A glutton for punishment, that was what she was. Driving half-way across the country with a man who had told her to stay out of his life. Goes back to being a weak-willed, soft-hearted, first class idiot when it comes to Alex Karev, she thought as she neatly folded the outfit she had decided on for the funeral. For good measure she added a pair of black slacks and a blouse she knew wouldn't wrinkle, as well as a couple pairs of a jeans, some sweaters, and, at the last minute, some of her sexier underwear. She told herself it wasn't for Alex. She just liked the way the silk and lace felt against her skin. Plus, her mother had taught her to always pack her best panties when she was going on a trip where there would be people she didn't know. The why of it was lost on Izzie and usually she didn't follow the rule. This time was an exception. If for some reason Alex seen the contents of her suitcase she wasn't going to let him see the frumpy granny panties she'd been wearing lately.
The high pitched ring of her cell phone startled her as she fought to zip the over stuffed suitcase. Over packing was another trait her mom had instilled; you never know what you might need so pack a little of everything. She hadn't packed everything but close enough. She gave up on the zipper as she reached for her phone. As she suspected it was Alex. Having him call felt a little weird. They hadn't talked since he told her to stay out of his life. "Almost ready," she panted as she answered the phone. God help him if he told her she didn't need to come. Whether Alex Karev liked it or not she was going with him. This was something she needed to do; she could feel that down to her bones.
"Want me to just come get you?"
The question surprised her a bit. It shouldn't have as it was a logical suggestion. It would save her a trip across town and him the wait. "Sure. I'm just off eighty-second street. The Little Madrid apartments." She winced as he started lecturing her about the neighborhood and asking if she had a dead bolt. "Yes, I have a deadbolt! And seriously, Alex, the neighborhood isn't that bad. A little old and run down but not bad." Resisting the urge to roll her eyes, Izzie propped the phone against her shoulder and finagled the suitcase's zipper closed. She muttered a curse under her breath as she hauled the luggage toward her front door. Knowing Alex he had called half-way to Tacoma. Fifteen minutes later, he proved her right by knocking on her door.
"You shouldn't just open the door without finding out whose there."
Another lecture? Izzie thought about reminding him that they were no longer married, hell they weren't even friends. He didn't have the right to question her living arrangements or tell her how she should or shouldn't answer the door. "I knew it was you, Alex." Without listening to the rest of his grumbling about her apartment she shrugged into her navy blue Northface jacket and grabbed the bag of snacks she had packed when she first came home. She would leave the luxury of hauling out her suitcase to Alex. "Do you want me to drive? I've spent the last twelve hours sleeping so I should be good to go for a while."
"Twelve hours? Lucky you." With little effort, he lift her suitcase and walked out the door without answering her. It was typical Alex. Lucky for him she understood how he worked, how he thought. She would be the one driving because he hadn't had much sleep. A painful jolt stabbed her heart as she thought about one of the reasons he hadn't had much sleep. Her name had been Lucy and she was a doctor, not a skank. Izzie hated when there was a name to the faceless sluts Alex bedded. Her throat tightened as she followed him out, pausing only to make sure the locks on her door were secure. When she had agreed to staying out his life it had been so he could have a shot at happiness. That was what he had said he wanted; to be free to find a woman who could love him and stick around. She had the love part down pat, it was the sticking around part she had trouble with. It was hard to stay when she knew he was with her out of pity. If she hadn't gotten sick he wouldn't have married her. How did she stay when she knew something like that?
"Here." Alex turned to hand her the keys to his car. Their fingers brushed, sending a jolt of electricity up her arm. The electricity made her long for the past; when he would trail his fingers up and down her arm while staring into her eyes and telling her he loved her. If she closed her eyes she could almost still hear him. "You sure you're good to drive? You're looking a little spaced out."
Blinking, Izzie brushed off thoughts of the past. What good was there in wishing for things that couldn't be? It was better to stay in the here and now. "Sorry. Was just thinking." She closed her fingers around the key chain, a little surprised that he still used the tarnished letter I key chain she had given him as a joke. She wanted to ask him why he had kept it but decided not to. The answer would probably disappoint her. Most likely he had forgotten he had it or was just too lazy to change it out.
"Do I want to ask?"
Wrinkling her brow, Izzie asked what he meant and then started laughing when he said her thoughts, did he want to ask what her thoughts had been. "Probably not," she answered truthfully. The last thing she wanted was him to pity her…again. She had more self respect than that. At least she hoped she did. "Just…wishful thinking." The words came out sounding sadder than she meant for them to. If Alex noticed he didn't say. He silently shoved her suitcase into the back and then settled into the front passenger seat. Izzie fought back a sigh as she slid behind the wheel of a car she knew all to well. She was going to use this trip to either get over Alex or win him back. Those were her only two options because living the way she had lived since the divorce wasn't working.
