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Chapter 2 "Let's not pretend like we saw this coming."
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We say goodbye
I turn my back
Run away, run away
So predictable
Not far from here
You see me crack
Like a bone, like a bone
I'm so breakable
I'm on the road
To who knows where?
Look ahead, not behind I keep saying
There's no place to go
Where you're not there
On your rope, I hold tight
But it's freeing...
"Prodigal" One Republic
It was a good thing I was the fastest runner. I wasn't sure how long it had been since we started our game of cat and mouse, but it seemed I had eluded the dogs for the time being. I was exhausted, but more than that- I was furious, pissed, confused, hormonal, and depressed. I let out a deep breath. It was deeper than depressed...I was about to become the trophy wife for some self-centered ass. No, not even a trophy wife, even that was too good for me. I was going to be used to carry on a genetic line. A damn piece of ass...did it get any better?
'HEAR THAT?! That's it- you've got everything! You've taken every last piece of me and twisted the hope right out of it!'
My desperation only came out as a broken howl. Forsaken by any possibility that I would ever be happy. I wanted to curl up and die, but my legs carried me farther up the steep incline I was climbing, willing me to keep moving. I had to keep going. Perhaps if I outran them for the full week, this would be over and they would leave me alone. It was something. At this point, I was grasping at straws to keep myself sane.
I couldn't even try to see the good in this situation at this point. If these were different circumstances, I might have been happy that I wasn't sterile, but I couldn't bring myself to be happy about having children with a man I hardly knew, much less loved. I might have even been happy about breaking away from the packs, becoming a lone wolf- if things were different. Yet, as it stood, I just felt alone. More empty than I had before. I actually missed the erratic thoughts of my brothers in my head.
I reached the top of the small mountain, finally slowing to a stop. My thoughts were still less than clear and a I felt jumpy, instinct dictating everything before my mind had time to process it, but I could focus enough now to phase back. I collapsed as soon as my human form took over, naked and trembling with emotion. Distance helped. It seemed the more distance I had from boys, the better my condition got. I pulled my body close, balling up on the dark forest floor.
I wasn't sure when I had realized it was night, but I wasn't on the ground long before I got up and wiped my cheeks of the tear stains. I was going to make it through this, just like I made it through everything else. If it was one of the jerks who caught me first, I wouldn't go down without a fight. I sure as hell wouldn't make it a pleasurable experience. I looked down, letting out a shaky sigh as I realized I needed some clothes and something to eat. I looked around, not really recognizing anything in the moonlit woods, but I started walking forward nonetheless. I didn't want to phase- I hated feeling like I was stuck that way, especially with no way to communicate, but I had to admit it would be faster. No matter- walking just gave me time to think. I tried to turn everything over in my head, but it seemed useless. Run away- that was the only option that seemed available. Damn it.
It was now beyond obvious that I was doomed from the moment my mother named me Leah. I had read my namesake's story in my mother's old Bible when I was younger. She was married to Jacob, which made me want to hurl at the time, but only after her father decieved him. Her life was filled with nothing but pain and sorrow. She spent her life trying to make her husband love her, when really he wanted her sister instead. She was a pathetic, jealous bitch. It wasn't until the last few years that I started to realize how well my name fit me.
I stumbled over a log- taking in my surroundings again only to realize I knew where I was standing. After all that running, I ended up just a few miles outside of La Push. From here, the closest house was Emily and Sam's. I bit my lip anxiously. I couldn't go home- that would be the first place anyone would look. If there was any descency left in the world, which for me I was sure there was not, Sam would be out on patrol. But by now, I had bigger concerns than petty jealousy of the people I cared about.
I noticed I was still shaking as I walked up onto the small porch and raised my hand to knock, but I couldn't feel anything- so surely I wasn't cold. As soon as a few hard beats sounded on the wooden door, I backed off the porch and watched the lights come on inside. I backed even further into the yard as I realized my instincts were rising again. Sam must be inside, probably coming to the door. Great. Just terrific. I was out of reach for the porchlight's glow when it came on and the door creaked open. Sam's voice sounded tired, it must be late, but I wasn't sure.
"Who's there? Guys- what do you want?" I guess he figured it was Paul or Jared.
"Sam- I... is Emily awake?" My voice sounded small and unusual to me- broken and defeated in a way I had never heard it before. I stayed in the shadows, my arms crossed over my naked chest in a futile attempt to comfort myself. There was a long pause as I stared toward the ground illuminated by the warm light of their home.
"Leah? Is that you? Wh- What is it- What's wrong?" I could hear his footsteps come farther out onto the porch, making me back toward the forest a few more steps. My eyes finally looked up at him, the worry in his voice also etched into his face.
"Its nothing- I was just-" My voice died in my throat as a breeze brought Jacob's scent to my nose. My heart was racing again automatically and my eyes darted around the edges of the forest for a sign of his direction. "Shit."
"Leah?" Sam prompted, his concern growing- no doubt from my wild expression. He took another step, catching my attention immediately.
"Stop- don't... please Sam- just- just stay there- I need you to stay away from me." My voice sounded frantic, and if my thoughts weren't hazing over again, I might have worried that I resembled a lunatic. My back was to the edge of the forest now as Sam stood on his bottom step, obviously starting to say something, but a noise from the other side of the house interrupted and I took off like a startled deer again. Well- a startled wolf anyway. Within steps of the forest I had phased and my legs were carrying me toward the beach, instinct too strong to be denied.
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JacobPOV
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Her scent caught my wolf nose just as I noticed that Sam's porchlight was on around front. By the time I ran into view, Sam was standing alone in the yard, looking confused. I phased back, pulling on my cut-off shorts and wiping a spot of blood from my brow. It took everything I had not to chase that beautiful- NO. NO. NO. This was Leah we were talking about. It had to be the hormones. Even though I knew deep down that I was never going to fall for Renesmee in that way, I sure as hell couldn't let myself fall for my Beta. I mean, don't get me wrong- Leah is definately...er- likeable...its just that I cared so much for her. I couldn't live with myself if I ever imprinted again and left her. At least, that's what I told myself- despite the fact I knew imprinting again was an impossibility.
"What the hell is going on?" Sam interrupted my thinking as he ushered us back into his home, Emily already waiting with coffee. I could tell by her expression that I looked haggered, but that was the least of my concerns right now. My wounds were already healing, but my mind was racing- part of me trying to figure out how to save my Beta, the other part fighting off the overwhelming urge to...well- 'dominate' her.
Sam asked what was happening again, so I began by telling him about the new pack, then about Leah's 'situation', and finally, about the fight I had with this pack when they started to chase after Leah. My anger rose a fraction just thinking about them, having to fight them off to keep them from running after my Le-...my Beta. I took a deep breath, Emily handing me a hot cup of coffee with a worried look on her face.
"And Seth? Where is he?" Sam raised a brow, obviously as worried for my pack as I was. I had to give it to Sam, he was a hell of an Alpha. Since we split the pack down the middle, I could only hope to be as good a leader as he was. Frankly, it scared the hell out of me that he was talking about recombining the two packs lately, so he could step down. I understood he wanted to be with Emily, but me taking over a pack of 32 wolves by myself was ridiculous!
"I sent him to warn the Cullens about the newcomers before the fight broke out. I told him to tell them to stay inside until we all meet back there. He should be out grabbing Quil, Embry, and the others now." I ran a hand through my shaggy locks, leaning back in the chair. "I don't know what we can even do, Sam. We can't get near Leah without the urge to chase her taking over us, believe me. Then there are those jerks chasing her, too. We can't go starting a war with potential allies over this, but we can't just give Leah up either..." I stared into the dark liquid sitting at the bottom of my cup, hoping the answer would come to me. Nothing. Damn it. I couldn't just let Leah go, not like this. Not now. Not yet...
Sam stood up then and grabbed his phone, putting it to his ear for just a moment before speaking with someone on the other end. "Jared. Everyone is to meet outside the Cullens in 10 minutes, we have a serious problem." He paused for a moment and sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "No- just make sure everyone else stays downwind, I'll explain soon. Okay." He hung up the phone. "C'mon- we have to hurry. Jared just spoke with Seth and apparently Collin, Paul, and Embry came across Leah's scent in the forest and have disappeared."
I followed Sam out of the house as soon as I was able to pick my jaw up off the floor. Great, just what I needed- more horny wolves chasing my Beta around in the woods! I scoffed, phasing behind Sam as we kept pace with each other all the way to the Cullen's home. Our minds had immediately been filled with our pack's thoughts- confusion and lust seemed to be the major emotions coming into play. I could hear the animalistic things rolling around inside Embry's head, causing me to growl as I ordered them to come to the Cullen's and give up their search for Leah. Thank God no one had cornered her yet. At least, no one from our side.
'I swear if one of those idiots gets ahold of her...'
'Cool it, Jacob- we'll figure something out...' Sam thought, trying to be convincing, but my hormones were already putting up a fight to go after her, save her...take her.
'Where's Seth?' I had sifted through everyone's thoughts, but Seth was nowhere to be found. It was then that I saw him in one of the other's mind, standing outside the Cullen's in his human form. 'Why the hell did he phase back?'
'Think about it, Jake. Would you really want to be hearing all these thoughts about YOUR sister?' Quil laughed as he pointed out the angry and disgusted look on Seth's uncomfortable features. He had a point. Even I was finding it hard to deal with the thoughts of those who had become intoxicated with Leah's scent. They couldn't help it, but it was a good thing Leah couldn't hear us anymore- heads would roll.
As soon as we were all together, we worked out the last of our patrol regimen. Everyone not out on patrol with one of the Alpha's would stay behind to guard the Cullen's place. Sam and Seth were each taking a group of 4 guys to run perimeter looking for the outsiders. Sam agreed to let me look for Leah on my own. I had to find her, bring her home. I had to protect her.
'She is mine.' A small voice in the back of my mind kept chanting to me. It has to be the hormones, Jacob. Instinct- thats all. Leah doesn't even like you- how in the hell could you expect her to want- Damn it, STOP. She is your Beta. Thats all.
I was trying to trace her scent, fragrant and intoxicating in a maddening way, just enough to drive me crazy. She had always smelled nice, but this was unbelievable. Pheramones, Jacob- get a grip. I kept tracking her, trying not to go in circles. I let out a low growl when her scent kept overlapping with those jackasses, but I tried not to think about it too much. My legs carried me faster as I neared the beach cliffs, finally coming out of the forest to overlook First Beach. I spotted a small figure sitting on a log that made my heart jump up into my throat. She was alone. God- I had been so worried about her.
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LeahPOV
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I could smell the salty ocean breeze as it brushed past my face, clearing my head as best it could. What was I going to do? Obviously, my body wasn't going to allow me to sleep much until this disaster was over, but I was already emotionally drained. My physical self, however, was still just as tense as when I started- always on the alert, always on edge. It was like I was constantly poised for a sprint. My blood must have been replaced with adrenaline while I wasn't looking.
The sky was starting to lighten, soon the sun would poke over the horizon. I listened to the calming lull of the waves crashing on the cliffs nearby, hugging my naked body closer as I tried to imagine what it would be like if I were forced to leave here. The haze in my mind didn't let me get very far, but the emotion swelled up in my throat all too quickly and tears began to wet my cheeks. Damn. I definately didn't miss PMS.
"Tag...you're it." An all-too familiar voice rang out behind me, causing my legs to spring up from the log and face my Alpha. His hands raised defensively as he backed away. His irresistable smirk curled his lips, but his brown hues were filled with something else. Something I couldn't quite place. "Woah- slow down, Leah- its just me. I just want to talk to you. We've been worried..."
"You have to go, Jake. I can't- I- I can't control it..." I pleaded. I took a few more steps back, trying to control the lust that fueled this instinct to run. The pebbles shifted beneath my barefeet, my eyes shifting along the edges of the beach before returning to Jacob's features. It was then that I noticed he was pulling something from his pocket. I took another step back involuntarily. Once again, he held his hands up in defense, revealing that he had fished my cellphone from his shorts.
"You kinda left that behind, I figure you might need it if you get into trouble." He shrugged sheepishly as he leaned forward a step and placed it on the log where I was previously seated. He then backed away to his original position, looking more anxious than before.
I glanced at the phone, then back up to Jacob. "And who would I call if I did get into trouble? One of the boys?" I scoffed slightly, shaking my head as the raw emotion became evident in my voice and tears glistened behind my dark blue eyes. I couldn't remember ever crying in front of Jacob, and I fought against it even now.
"Me, Leah. You'll call me." I was slightly taken back by the seriousness and concern in his voice, my eyes searching his for some reason behind his caring. I was no longer part of the pack- how did this do the pack any good? He couldn't possibly care about me- not like this. He had that halfling freak. He didn't need me. "And don't try that strong, independent lone wolf shit with me either. I'm going to do everything I can to keep those bastards away from you, but I need you to help me out here, Leah. I need to know what you want me to do." His brown hues were begging me for something, but all I could think of was running.
"Jake- I...I don't know. Maybe-" Before I could even begin to collect my thoughts, Jacob's russett wolf form stood before me, growling at five large figures that santered out of the shadows. My mind flew into a panic and I didn't even let it register that I had phased as I held my phone between my teeth and stared at the newcomers. Troy and his two goons, I recognized- the other two not so much. I was backing towards my only escape into the forest, figuring that these two new figures were more of Troy's pack.
It was apparent in the next few moments that a fight was going to break out. Jacob's hair was standing on end and Troy was staring at me like he had already won this twisted game. Jacob was outnumbered- he couldn't fight them! Not for me! Damn it, this was all wrong. I couldn't make myself move, at least not in the direction I wanted to go. I wanted to help my Alpha- I was his Beta, how could I leave him like some coward?! For all my effort, I still felt myself backing away- growls vibrating up from my chest. I deserved this- somehow I deserved to watch the men I love get taken away from me. And as true as I thought that may be, I knew that Jacob didn't deserve this. He didn't deserve to die for some woman who brought nothing but misery to everything she touched.
It was all moving in slow motion as about 5 of my former packmates bled out of the forest to surround the intruders. All the scents hitting my nose, the tension and growls- I couldn't weld myself to the ground any longer and took off like lightening toward the forest. Everyone began the chase, Jacob and Troy rolling into a fight- biting and snarling at each other until they once again joined the rest of the hungry wolves on my trail. I could hear them- their animalistic growls and excited barks. Though I couldn't feel it, I could tell my body was wearing down. I was slower than usual, no doubt from lack of sleep these last two nights.
I ran through a stream, soaking my paws and acknowledging the sound of splashing behind me moments later. They were closer than they should be. I quickened my pace, noting the familiar scents in the air around me. My mind was working overtime trying to figure out what to do. I couldn't just let them have me. I took a sharp left, remembering that I was running adjacent to the sea. I suppose the feeling of wanting to be caught is fading into desperation. I could hear fighting and howling in the distance, no doubt most of my followers were brawling with each other. Damnit- I'm not worth this!
The trees thinned out, parting to reveal the high cliffs overlooking the Olympic Peninsula. I took a deep breath, feet halting right on the edge of the rocks which dropped down into the murky undertoe below. I turned back to see Jacob, Troy, and Embry stop abruptly at the mouth of the forest. Jacob's eyes looked horrified as he realized I had nowhere to go. I took a deep breath, dropping the forgotten phone from my teeth and phasing. A shiver ran up my spine, but I was certain it had nothing to do with the cool morning breeze. Jacob was the first to join me in human form, then Troy and Embry. Had I the room, I would have backed away, but as it was- my feet were on the absolute last edge of earth the cliff could spare.
Jacob's terrified expression was now stretched across all his features, his hand reached out to me almost in reflex. "Leah- please, hon...just-"
"Stop saying my name like that." I shook my head, blue eyes meeting his brown.
"Like what?" He raised a brow trying to be sarcastic. A bittersweet smirk tugged at his perfect lips. It wouldn't work- he couldn't lighten everything up this time.
"Like you actually care about me..." I felt a tear slide down my cheek as I said the words, hardly a whisper. Shock and hurt seem to take over his features, but I couldn't process their meaning as I took a full step backward, letting the void swallow me as I disappeared from their sight. Falling freely to the ocean below. Perhaps the water would take pity on me- have mercy on me in a way that nothing else would. Perhaps it would let me die beneath its cool depths and be freed from everything. It was then then that I thought of Jacob. His face twisted in pain as I uttered those words. Jacob, of all people- deserved happiness. He deserved to live a long and happy life with his imprint, with someone like Nessie. As much as I would hate to admit it, the little halfling girl was a ray of sunshine, just like her Jacob. She had never been anything but polite and happy, making me realize a long time ago that he was better off with her. He deserved happiness with a girl who deserved it as well. He deserved not to be bothered with someone like Leah, who always weighed down his bright thoughts with her selfish anger and sadness.
He was better off this way. He would understand that.
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Thanks for the great reviews, guys! I hope you like this chapter just as much. Its a bit shorter, but I felt like leaving it there for dramatic purposes. R&R!