Chapter 1 – The New Cat Toy
Disclaimer- I don't own Hetalia which belongs to Himaruya, and manuals based off of LolliDictator. I do, however, own my oc Akemi!
One Friday October night I was sneaking out of my private woodlands behind my home. Finally making it to my front door, I notice a slip of paper sticking out. Someone must have came by when I was practicing my hand to hand combat in the woods with my handmade dummies.
"Neko, Akemi, you have a package awaiting you at your local post office," I read aloud. I giggled a little as I crumpled it up. It always gets me when people used my human name. I had to pick something appropriate right? Skipping inside to my bathroom I prepared to go out to town. Not bothering with my close cut raven hair that only was long enough to cover my right eye. No one can ever see that eye. EVER. After straightening up my Black Butler Grell t-shirt, I looked into the mirror one last time. A 114 year old girl who only seemed 14 looked back with two different colored eyes. I had one luminous green somewhat normal left eye, but a blazing amber cat slitted right eye. I quickly brush my bangs to cover it again. I must always try to keep it covered to prevent humans from becoming to nosy in my business.
An hour later I'm back home with a brand new package in my arms. I never understood why they would waste their time sending that stupid note to my doorstep if they could have just sent me the package while they were at it. Stupid humans are so silly. Plopping onto my bed I pull out my laptop. I ordered some new Hetalia DVDs last week, and I planned on spending the rest of the night watching them! What was more amusing than hilarious stereotypical countries and their cheeky antics. Yeah, I said it. I said cheeky antics. Sue me.
A flash of neon colors then sent me almost five feet in the air almost blinding my sensitive eyes.
"MY EYES! I'M BLIND! … okay, I'm fine!" I yelled. What is it? Putting on my totally kick butt sunglasses I read the colorful text. "Congratulations! I've just won your own set of our Hetalia units. Click "Continue" to accept." What's a 'unit'? Can I eat it? Well, anyway, nothing I can't handle! Besides it's probably just some new merchandise or something like that, and everyone knows you can't have too much Hetalia products! Clicking the big continue button I waited for it to ask my address, name, etc., but instead it only thanked me for my order, told me it'll be arriving in the morning, and closed itself out. Strange. As long as I get my stuff I guess it's okay though.
Eventually I got too tired to watch any more Hetalia, so yawning and rubbing my eyes I rested my head on my fluffy pillow and hugged my Russia plushie closer. I wish some things could always be like this. Calm and quiet.
/The Next Morning/
5 am I was rudely awoken by some idiot beating the crap out of my doorway. I swear I will tear out this imbecile's tongue out if he keeps hitting my door! And as if they actually heard my thoughts, the knocking suddenly stopped. Thank God.
BRING, BRING, BRING, BRING!
"AAAAHHHHHH! I SWEAR IF YOU RING THAT DAMN BELL ONE MORE TIME, I WILL PUSH YOU DOWN A STAIR CASE MADE OF BROKEN GLASS WITH RUBBING ALCOHOL AT THE BOTTOM!" I screamed as I ran down stairs and pulling open the door. There stood a random guy with greasy old man hair and mustache. Ew.
"Sign this," he demanded shoving a pad and pen at my chest. It toke all my power not to rip that dirty old man's unibrow off, but I managed to sign it without any fuss.
"May I ask what I'm signing for?" I asked handing it back with maybe a little too much force. He only gestured to person sized box behind him, handed me a thick manual, and practically ran to his mint green truck. I couldn't hold in the laughter as he drove off. Must suck to drive around in a truck with flying mint bunny on it for a living. Pfffffffffffff, He probably deserved it that jerk.
Then I turned to the huge box. Is this the unit? I looked down at the manual. This will tell me what it is, right? Opening it up to the first page I hungrily read each word, eager to know what I won.
"CONGRATULATIONS! You have just purchased your very own ARTHUR KIRKLAND unit. This manual was written in order to ensure that you, the owner, can unlock your unit's full potential as a guardian, boyfriend, and/or pirate," I read aloud.. England! I nearly spazed out when I read that. I read more of the manual. I had to cover my nose to prevent a nosebleed when I read his "length." Either this person was a pervert or the owners really were perverts. Finally, I got to how to wake him up. Option one and five seemed too easy and boring while options two and four wouldn't do because I couldn't cook to save my life and I don't have those songs on my Ipod. Choice three it is!
I ran to my cellar and looked through my vast collection of vodka and imported German beer looking for some whiskey. What? I don't drink the stuff, but its a hobby. Oh well, where is that whiskey! After eventually finding two bottles I ran back to the large box blocking my front door. Standing a healthy distance away I clicked them together. Thankfully I hadn't been an inch closer or else I'd have been impaled with a large stake from the crate. Scrabbling out came the great United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland begging for the whiskey, and I happily gave it to him. In a matter of twenty seconds he had managed to chug down both of the bottles.
"So now that we got that out of the way," I say holding out my small hand with my best creeper smile, "Welcome to hell!"
"Pardon me, miss. I didn't quite catch that last part," he said a little flushed from the alcohol while he toke my hand in his and sloppily shook it.
"Don't worry about it. You, my good sir, may call my Akemi. Akemi Neko," I introduced myself. "How about I show you to your room. I'm sure you'd need to know where to pass out in when you're too hammered to stand," I nonchalantly say leading him up the long spiral stair. He too drunk to get up them without falling down and cracking his head open by himself and because I didn't want to loss my first toy yet. I decided to lock arms and go up together. Someone get a camera, I am in heaven!
"And this is your room!" I announced swinging open the door in a flourish revealing a British themed room with the union jack bedsheets. "If ya need anything, and I mean ANYTHING, I'll be next door reading some UsUk doujinshis... I mean on my laptop on ... Don't destroy too much, okay?"
"Sure, love," he said groggily stumbling to his new bed and I'm pretty sure he fell asleep before his head touch the pillow. Well, looks like I don't have to worry. Carefully I shut the door and sprinted down the hall past my room and through the open third floor window. In midair as I felt the air whoosh against my skin and transformed into my cat form as I have done a thousand times before. I landed on my pure black paws and toke off running. To anyone watching I would be only a midnight streak of black zooming by. I had some adventures to plan for my new cat toy. The only thing to do is figure out the most fun way for him to find out what I am. What fun! But then again, maybe It would be better to let him find out for himself. Which ever is fine with me. I'm just happy not to be alone anymore.