The meeting was the same was usual, with the dreary and pigheaded council men pandering on and on over discussions of war with the Kingdom of the West and whether our economy should seek to create a new form of currency. As Queen, I was allowed the power to respond to these questions, but not the power to interrupt each council member's argument. I watched and partially listened to their points, but still I couldn't see past their arrogant demeanors and their unvirtuous past. Especially Lord Barkus, who I saw caressing a maid at my coronation ball, was only more irritatingly drool as he carried on by saying that he firmly beliefs in "bringing force down on them." I wonder how his wife would feel about his "heavy handed" social activities.
Eric's voice suddenly came into my head as I glanced at Lord Barkus, saying "Lord Barkus doesn't get his name for nothing, all that barking with his mistress must make him seem like a real houndog." He said jokingly.
I laughed as though he was really there, with his charming and brash humor. Lord Barkus looked up to me and he had a puzzled expression on his face. My laugh faded as his expression turned angry.
"You find this funny, your Majesty?" He asked bluntly.
"No, not at all. I'm sure the council is enthralled with your political bantering. Carry on, we're all interested." I said sarcastically.
He continued and still feeling Eric's presence, I put my head down and smiled. He could always make a boring moment interesting. I only grew solemn at realizing he was only a thought and not really there.
I could hear pitter patter echoing behind the door to the council room as I watched Susan rush through the door, breathless and frantic. "My Queen, the soldiers have returned from war. They are here, come quick."
My heart raced with joy and I excused myself to follow her to the main entrance of the castle. It was pouring rain outside and the ground was covered in mud. But I didn't care. Eric was home at last.
Several generals led the rest of the group along on their glorious steeds as they trudged into the village, exhausted and relieved to be home to their loved ones. As they came to the castle, I searched for Eric, wanting to see his expression as he laid eyes on me. I hoped he would be happy to see me.
"My Queen, I return to you with news of our victory. We have successfully won the war for the King across the pond." General Hamus cried, handing me the conformation letter. "Though not all of us have returned home." He stepped off his horse to come towards me.
My heart stopped for a moment, overcome with fear and panic at his hinting words. "Who has not returned?"
"I'm sorry my Queen, but your friend, the Huntsman, he didn't survive the last battle."
I was motionless, still praying to God that this was only a nightmare and I had fallen asleep during the council meeting.
"How, how, what happened?" I asked, trying to not come undone at the seams.
"A fire, there was a fire in the woods where we ambushed the Dronamors. It spread too quickly and soon the whole forest was enflamed. Eric was helping his comrades get out after they were trapped under a tree trunk. But then he was trapped by a ring of fire. We heard his screams through the flames and we tried to get in, but the flames were too powerful."
Flashes of his words played a grim picture in my head. His determination, the horror the men felt as they endured such blazing heat, Eric doing all he can to get everyone else, and soon he was surrounded and engulfed himself.
It was almost too much for me to handle. Too much to fathom. Knowing his promise would not be fulfilled. That he wasn't returning to me.
"I'm so sorry, my Queen. We did all we could, but he is gone."
"Did you collect his body? I mean his corpse." That last word tasted like ash in my mouth. However, I needed to let him rest in peace at least.
"We did, but he is burned severely."
"Bury him then. In the field by his mother's old house. He'd like it there."
"As you wish."
The men all trailed away. As they did, Susan, seeing my saddened expression turned to me.
"My Queen, are you alright?"
"I'd rather not talk about it." I said firmly. Tears were starting to build up in my eyes. I started to walk down the hallway, wanting to be alone as soon as possible.
"Your Majesty..."
"I'd rather be alone!" I cried angrily. I turned away from her and I rushed to my room. A single tear fell from my face and I tried to hold back my approaching tears, gasping for air as I did.
I've never been so manic, so uncontrollable in my demeanor, as I sobbed like a little girl. My mother's death, my father's murder and my imprisonment struck me fierce, but something about this hit me harder and I only gave in to my grief. I knocked over the chair beside my bed and I tossed my pillows off my bed until they hit the wall one by one. I stopped for a moment and paused only to feel tears streaming down my face.
My knees were weak, leaving me feeble and unable to stand, to which I succumbed to the numbness and I crumbled to the floor beside the fireplace as I sobbed. My hand went over my eyes, as my mouth continued to cough out my screams of sorrow. My heart throbbed at the utter pain, the pain of losing him. Losing my life. My reason to believe in the world again. My love, I knew, for sure now there was no pain like the one I was experiencing was any harder to bear.