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Old feelings

Barry woke up with a pounding headache and a small light being shined in his eye. He tiredly attempted to swat it away finding Caitlin's disapproving face. Faintly he heard Cisco arguing with Joe about what happened. Once Caitlin announced to everyone Barry was awake a small crowd was formed around his bed.

Cisco was the first to speak "What happened man?"

Barry cringed at the memory "I really don't know, one second I was talking to the Meta human and the next thing I know I'm in 4th grade again and Tony Woodward is breaking my ankle."

"You had a flashback to your 4th grade bully who terrorized you every day?" Iris confirmed.

"You don't have to remind me." Barry mumbled. "It was so much more real than a flashback he was there and I was helpless and in pain just like grade school, I tried to get away but he was everywhere."

Caitlin frowned at that. "What triggered it?"

Barry replayed what happened "We were talking and he turned around and we made eye contact, his eyes were…so cold"

"And that's when the flashback started?" Joe inquired.

Barry nodded his confirmation. "How did you guys find me so quickly?"

"Well your vitals were dropping rapidly and we could hear you through your eyepiece you were whimpering and crying out. We called Joe, the police were already on their way but he managed to get to you first and sneak you out back."

Barry blushed at the amount of vulnerability he showed. "I'm really sorry" he told the team "I don't know why I was effected so much."

"Hey it's ok, just because you're a superhero doesn't mean you're invincible." Iris said comforting him. Barry nodded his thanks but couldn't shake the feeling of failure.

"Did you get a good look at his face or any unusual features that could be helpful to his identification?" Cisco asked.

"Umm I didn't really get a good look before you know what happened…" Barry trailed off awkwardly. The others nodded understandingly at him. "But he's a male medium height average weight probably late 30s. " I'm really sorry I couldn't be more helpful." Barry added feeling uncharacteristically unsure of himself.

"Hey you'll get him next time." Caitlin told him kindly. The thought of having to face him again made Barry feel undeniably sick. "Since the eyes seem to be the focus point of his powers wear these" she said handing him sunglasses "and avoid looking him in the eye."

"Got it." Barry said praying that would work.

Ignoring the disproving looks from Joe and Iris he decided to stay at STAR labs and train. He managed to create lots of new ways to take the mysterious Meta human down without making direct eye contact. Cisco swore he would come up with a nickname for the villain once they learn the extent of his powers and his identity. Both Cisco and Caitlin had to practically force Barry to take a break. Barry's got beaten before but this time it was different, the Meta found a way to unlock all those feelings he had as a kid. The feelings of blame, doubt, insecurity, and self-hatred he had more than his fair share of experimenting with after his mom died. A day full of training did boost his confidence and mood, he was in a much better mood at the end of the day when he went home.

The next few days we're very relaxing for Barry. The crime in the city was much lower and there was no sign of the hallucination causing Meta human. Barry's guard was still up, after he spent all day in his office where he was assigned on smaller crimes which were open and shut cases. He would go to STAR labs and train or catch robbers a throughout the city until Joe would call him home for dinner. After that he would finish some lab reports and fall into a restless sleep. As much as Barry would hate to admit it most of his time was consumed by that Meta, it was his last thought at night and first in the morning. It's what drove him to be better, faster, and stronger. Barry followed this routine for a few days, his family stopped worrying about him as they were unaware that his obsession to beat the META grew. He was in STAR labs when everything fell apart. Barry and Cisco were arguing about what pizza toppings were the best when an alert sounded from a lab computer signaling a break in at the local bank.

"If this is the meta human it's pretty obvious he's running low on money" Caitlin observed "this is the third bank he robbed since he got here." Barry was praying it wasn't the Meta human, despite all the work he put into training he still felt unsure of himself.

"Hey man you're going be fine." Cisco assured him.

"You know how to beat him, you got this Barry" Caitlin added.

Barry nodded determined not to let his friends down and he sped away grabbing the sunglasses.

By the time Barry rushed to the crime scene he was feeling more confident. Walking through bank the sight of two bank tellers slumped over both covered in sweat made his heart drop. The Meta was definitely here. Barry crammed his sunglasses on and cautiously made his way to the back room. The Meta once again was facing his back to Barry throwing money into an old bag.

"Let us help you" Barry said grabbing the Meta's attention "You don't have to be the bad guy.

The Meta turned around and Barry kept his eyes on the floor. "The flash we meet again" he drawled "you've faced enough villains to know it doesn't work like that."

"But it can work that way!" Barry insisted "Be the hero."

"And how much does that pay?" The Meta questioned with a teasing tone.

"That's what this is about the money?!" Barry angrily asked.

"Oh you have no idea" the Meta said with a sly grin walking over to the flash and tilting his head up forcing their eyes to meet.

"Sunglasses… cute" the Meta said with a smirk as icy blue eyes met hazel. Within seconds the Flash was taken back to the day his mother was killed and he could do nothing about it.

The Meta grabbed his bag of money and climbed over the flash's trembling body. Sometimes mental pain is worse than physical. He had a meeting to attend to about a certain vigilante and the price one is willing to pay for a broken Flash.

The mysterious Meta human is going be attending a Rogues meeting. I haven't decided if I'm going include it in the next chapter but if you think I should then mention it in the reviews! It's really late here right now and I'm super tired so I'm really sorry for any grammar mistakes you might find. But please review, I love your feedback!