Holidays are Heavy formerly Holidays Are Hell
Author: MoonStarDutchess
Chapter 2: Uneasy Holidays
Disclaimer: Full Metal Alchemist and all its characters are the property of Hiromu Arakawa. No profit was made from this fanfiction. The only things that I do own are the OC's if any. This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance of original characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The author holds exclusive rights to the overall course of the plot. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited
"Oh, my," Gracia said and looked to Roy. "Did we offend her? Is Christmas against her religion?"
Roy shook his head. "She doesn't get offended easy, and she doesn't have a religion. I didn't know she didn't celebrate Christmas." Roy thought back at the times when she told him she was going to her grandfather's home for Christmas. He never had any reason to doubt that she wasn't doing what she said. Through their years together, he'd always wanted to ask her to come with him, but propriety always prevented him from doing so. So if she weren't spending Christmas at Grumman's then why would she lie?
"Is Miss Riza okay?" Elicia asked.
Roy wasn't sure if he could be truthful if he answered. It wasn't often that haunted look flashed across her face so clearly. Even Gracia noticed it. He took a deep breath and tried to plaster on a smile but failed. Instead, he patted Elicia's head. "Yes, I'm sure she'll be fine."
"You don't sound convinced," Maes said.
"I'll meet you at the hotel. I need to go talk to her."
"Please, see if you can get her to stay. She someone special to you and I'd like to get to know her," Gracia said.
"How can you tell?"
"The way you looked at her when she was holding that baby," Gracia said. "You wanted that child to be yours. I know that look from a man. How long?"
"What? Huh?" Maes said, looking from Roy to his wife and going back and forth with the actions until his neck hurt. Anyone who looked close enough could see Riza was special to Roy, but he was confused about the how long inquiry his wife made.
"About a year," Roy said, "but longer if I count the years I've known her."
"For goodness sake, what in the heck are you two talking about?" Maes asked. "I'm your best friend, I should know these things."
"I'll explain to him," Gracia said. "Just go get her and bring her back."
"Thanks Gracia," he said and walked off. "I'll meet you all back at the hotel."
Maes stared at his wife, waiting for her to turn around. She looked over her shoulder at him and grinned. "Roy's in love with Riza."
"Well, I think anyone with eyes that has known him for more than ten minutes can figure that out. What was the, how long, question about?"
"I meant how long he's been in love with her, but from what I gather, the year answer refers to how long they've been dating. He's been in love longer. Maes's mouth dropped. "A year? Why didn't he tell me?"
"They probably just wanted to keep it to themselves to keep people from nagging them about marriage. Especially you," she said.
"But I was nagging him about that anyway," Maes said. When I actually saw him.
"Not at your optimum nagging level," Gracia said. "You haven't talked to him that much."
Even though Maes had just thought about the lack of time he spent with Roy, hearing Gracia say it made his stomach drop. They weren't the close friends they used to be. There was no time for them to be. It had nothing to do with a lack of fondness either. Roy was a busy man and Maes was out of the loop. Sometimes a sense of uselessness washed over him as he watched his friend rise in the ranks all without his help. Roy hadn't really needed him after all.
"Are Miss Riza and Uncle Roy going to get married?" Elicia asked. Maes was thankful for his little girl's interruption.
"No, Elicia," Gracia said. "Not yet anyway."
Maes's thoughts changed from feeling useless to feeling pleased. At least Roy had Riza. A solid dependable woman he actually loved. Both Roy and Riza deserved the happiness that being together in marriage provided. "Let's get back to the hotel," he said.
-/-/-
The moment he walked into the house where they were staying, Riza's Aunt Ophelia approached him with a worried expression. "Roy, what's happened to Riza? She was supposed to stay another day, but she told me she had to leave for Central."
"I'm not sure," he said. "I'll have a talk with her."
"Please, see if you can get her to stay. It's so lovely having her here. We already love both of you," Ophelia said.
He smiled. From the moment they showed up to drop things off for Grumman, the family had welcomed them warmly. He'd like to get to know everyone here better as well. When the time was right.
He walked to the room he shared with Riza and saw she was packing her things. Her movements were quick but her folding and organization were the same as if she were taking her time. She jumped when he shut the door but didn't turn around.
"Don't try to convince me to stay. It won't work."
Roy walked over and wrapped his arms around her. He rested his chin on her shoulder. "I don't understand. You never struck me as the type to hate holidays.
"Please, I don't want to talk about it. Just let me go to Central and wait for you there."
"I can't let you spend holidays alone," he said. "My heart won't let me do that."
"I've done it for years, Roy," she said and went back to packing her case even though his arms were still around her. "I'm used to it. Don't worry."
"So you lied to me."
"What?"
"You told me you spent that time with your grandfather."
"Damn it," she muttered. He felt her trembling as he gently turned her around so she faced him.
"I . . . I never went to my grandfather's house for the holidays. Not once. He always tried to get me to, but I never could. Roy, I can't make myself celebrate holidays."
He took the clothing from her arms and placed them on the bed. Then he cupped her face and leaned forward. "Why?" he whispered.
Riza's hands went up to his waist and gripped the fabric of his black coat.
She took a deep breath. "Holidays have never been happy for me. I haven't celebrated them since I was eight years old."
"You celebrated them when I was staying with you."
"No, we didn't," she said. "You were never there on holidays. You always left a week early and came back a week after."
She's right. For some reason he had a vision of Christmas at Hawkeye's in his mind.
"We never decorated before you left to spend holidays with Christmas. That should've given you a hint we weren't going to celebrate it."
"I just assumed you and your father—"
"You knew how my father was. Did you really think he'd waste time on a holiday?"
Roy let go of her, walked over to the bed, and sat down on it, causing her suitcase to slide slightly toward the edge of the mattress. "Every year since we've first met, you've always accepted my Christmas gifts," he said.
"To make you happy."
"Come here." He held out his hand to her. She walked over and took his hand. He pulled her until she sat on his lap. "Why didn't you say something?"
"Because I don't want pity. I don't need it. While holidays are so happy for everyone else, for me they symbolize the opposite."
"Tell me why? What hurt you so much on holidays that kept you from wanting to celebrate them?"
Riza buried her face in the junction of his neck and shoulder and took a deep breath. Roy trailed his hand up and down her back as he felt her tense. He'd never seen her so distressed over anything other than Ishbal.
"I love you Riza," he said, feeling moved to say the three words even though she was well aware that he felt that way.
"I…I love you too."
He fell back on the bed and then kissed the top of her head. When she made no movement to stand, he said, "So does this mean you're staying."
She yanked away from him, her hands pressing against his chest hard to give her momentum to get to her feet. "That's low," she spoke, her voice shaking.
He sat up. "What's low?"
"Saying that to get me to stay."
He got to his feet, hurt that she thought he'd speak such powerful words only to get his way. He would never speak those words lightly.
"Of…of course not. I felt…I just…"
"Get out." She slammed her suitcase and grabbed the handle. His hand darted out to cover hers and his other landed on top of the case to keep her from yanking it off the bed.
"I love you," he said again. "I felt moved to tell you. There's no ulterior motive. I just want to spend the holiday with the people I love, and you're one of them."
"I don't know how to do that."
"Then tell me why you don't know. Why did you go so long without celebrating?"
"It's a long story," she said. "You should get back to the Hughes family."
Roy moved her luggage off the bed, sat down, and leaned back on the pillows. "Come here and talk to me."
He saw her hesitate at first, but then she sat down and leaned back against him. Then she began her story.